FabSwingers.com forum: If your genitals could talk

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What would yours say?

Mine would probably say "Have you forgotten how to use a razor woman!"

Or "Please don't let that man with the huge girth near me".

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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I'm not a bloody magic lamp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oi you, yes you, when in the fuck are you going to put me somewhere warm and moist. I got needs you know. Thats it, throttle me with your big strong hands, self self self self

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was that it?

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

If you keep shaking me like that it's not surprising I throw up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Feed me.

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Mine would say bollocks!

Or cojones if I'm on holiday

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

It's dark in here.

And I can't get rid of this annoying git next to me.

Talks bollocks all the time..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Isn't life good?"

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oi ! It's dark in here !

Pass me a torch !

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Steve, when I said I want to be somewhere warm, sticky and wet, I didn't mean your manky stinky 6 day old scuzzers"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Some very amusing genitalia we have

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They'd be singing Where has all the luv gone?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"They'd be singing Where has all the luv gone?"

A singing penis. How cute

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

"They'd be singing Where has all the luv gone?"

Mine would be singing that Englebert Humperdink song "pleeeaase releeeaase meeee"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My best friends a cunt & my neighbours an arsehole

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By *andaCouple
over a year ago

co down

Hey eyes...... Are ya feckin painted on?

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By *ylonesqueMan
over a year ago

Near Aberystwyth

Mine would say,

"Remind me again what I'm for".

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By *lutmeup500Woman
over a year ago

London

It would say "why have you named me Nancy? I'm a vagina!"

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

• Tell them all its not a doorbell. No-one is coming quicker if they press it harder.

• FFS trim at least?!

• Are you gonna let someone else touch me? I'm bored with you.

• Buy new batteries.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would probably say: "Sorry about your keyboard

-Marc

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It would probably say: "Sorry about your keyboard

-Marc"

I hope you cleaned it before Courtney used it again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am bored, same old hand every night"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It would say "why have you named me Nancy? I'm a vagina!""

Nancy is a popular name for a vagina

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By *irceWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

WTF....I guess, lol....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mine might say "What's that cherry smell?"

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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago

CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. THE MOORLANDS. BARMOUTH.

Hello big boy, come in xxx

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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago

CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. THE MOORLANDS. BARMOUTH.

Or it would just

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Closed for refurbishment..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm imagining people's genitals with mouths now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Closed for refurbishment.."

Designer vagina?

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By *lutmeup500Woman
over a year ago

London

"It would say "why have you named me Nancy? I'm a vagina!"

Nancy is a popular name for a vagina"

really?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Genitalia says to arm " How come you got it first ?". Arm replies "Premature ejaculation".

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It would say "why have you named me Nancy? I'm a vagina!"

Nancy is a popular name for a vagina

really?"

Yes

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By *outhernchappieMan
over a year ago

brighton

Isn't it cold today......

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Just been looking through some pictures and found one with a guys arm up my fanny.. I'm pretty sure it was saying "fuck. well there goes my youthful tightness.. I'll be a bucket if you don't settle down! OUCH I don't stretch that far, you fuckhead!"

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Mine is saying "I'm feeling the need to go potholing"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good god man do you know that vaginas are a thing have you tried using one instead of your fucking hand. Which isnot only unhygienic he's far too aggressive and has calases, now go get a woman. Twat!

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"Closed for refurbishment..

Designer vagina?"

Lol wouldn't be much point. Waste of money for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't even need two hands, but well played for trying!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Mine just said ouch in sympathy for yours. She doesn't stretch very well. A whole arm??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You don't even need two hands, but well played for trying!

Do you have small hands?

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

"Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Mine just said ouch in sympathy for yours. She doesn't stretch very well. A whole arm?? "

Lmao no but it felt like it!! Was barely to his wrist.. Clever camera angles though

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"What would yours say?

Mine would probably say "Have you forgotten how to use a razor woman!"

Or "Please don't let that man with the huge girth near me"."

I don't know but they'd probably be turning the air blue during my next waxing appointment.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Mine just said ouch in sympathy for yours. She doesn't stretch very well. A whole arm??

Lmao no but it felt like it!! Was barely to his wrist.. Clever camera angles though

Why do we let people do these things to our bodies?? Lol

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Mine just said ouch in sympathy for yours. She doesn't stretch very well. A whole arm??

Lmao no but it felt like it!! Was barely to his wrist.. Clever camera angles though

Why do we let people do these things to our bodies?? Lol "

Because it feels good?

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

"Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Mine just said ouch in sympathy for yours. She doesn't stretch very well. A whole arm??

Lmao no but it felt like it!! Was barely to his wrist.. Clever camera angles though

Why do we let people do these things to our bodies?? Lol

Because it feels good?"

Precisely this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have no idea what mine would say ?

Are you quite finished proving I'm good yet ?

I need a rest ?

I need more ?

Don't go back to anyone that does not appreciate me ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What would yours say?

Mine would probably say "Have you forgotten how to use a razor woman!"

Or "Please don't let that man with the huge girth near me".

I don't know but they'd probably be turning the air blue during my next waxing appointment."

I used to be really good with pain,now I can't even have my lower legs waxed without crying

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have no idea what mine would say ?

Are you quite finished proving I'm good yet ?

I need a rest ?

I need more ?

Don't go back to anyone that does not appreciate me ? "

Lol I can imagine yours to have a very big head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have no idea what mine would say ?

Are you quite finished proving I'm good yet ?

I need a rest ?

I need more ?

Don't go back to anyone that does not appreciate me ? "
thought yours might say will I fit inside there lol.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Steve, stop pissing about and make use of my second reason for being here"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Currently my vajajay is saying "SHAVE ME PROPERLY, WOMAN!!"

Mine just said ouch in sympathy for yours. She doesn't stretch very well. A whole arm??

Lmao no but it felt like it!! Was barely to his wrist.. Clever camera angles though

Why do we let people do these things to our bodies?? Lol

Because it feels good?"

Oh yea

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""Steve, stop pissing about and make use of my second reason for being here""

Not "Give me a rest Steve" ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine would say "I know when I'm not wanted"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine would say ouch

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

My oh My, smashed it again.

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By *eforfuncplCouple
over a year ago

Morecambe

Mine would say

Wtf just happened there lol X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Mine would say ouch

What you been doing to it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My oh My, smashed it again.

Walking into glass doors with an erection is dangerous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mine would say ouch

What you been doing to it?"

Forgot I don't have any pics visible now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Mine would say ouch

What you been doing to it?

Forgot I don't have any pics visible now

Ohhh,I think I have an idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

CAUTION! Unstable erection, follow diversion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stop sticking your fingers down my throat

Or....

And the Oscar goes to... (Me obviously haha)

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

""Steve, stop pissing about and make use of my second reason for being here"

Not "Give me a rest Steve" ?"

"Now I see, now I don't, now I see, now I don't, now I see......ooooh! I've sneezed!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Those pelvic floor exercises are working but jeez that cucumber has gone past its sell by date.

Sarah

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By *lutmeup500Woman
over a year ago

London

"why do you fuck so much?!"

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

It would probably tell me to give it a rest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't listen to your head, I'm in charge!"

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By *odramafunCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire/staffordshire

"It would probably tell me to give it a rest"

Was about to say that

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"What would yours say?

Mine would probably say "Have you forgotten how to use a razor woman!"

Or "Please don't let that man with the huge girth near me".

I don't know but they'd probably be turning the air blue during my next waxing appointment.

I used to be really good with pain,now I can't even have my lower legs waxed without crying "

It's not that bad if I have it done regularly but it's been several months since my last wax this time. It will smart.

It's worth it though.

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