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Favourite joke

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hi all. So what's your favourite joke?

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By *argaryen starkCouple
over a year ago

pinxton

why do women give birth ? .................... cos it hurts and they deserve it

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Don't let the sisterhood see that one, I will get some popcorn ready just in case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"why do women give birth ? .................... cos it hurts and they deserve it"

if it was men who had to give birth the world would end

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

At the moment, it is one of Phil Pagett's:

What idiot invented the speculum and didn't call it a flap jack?

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By *ylonhunterMan
over a year ago

uk

What did the chair say to the door????

Put your knob away

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By *ust_for_laughsCouple
over a year ago

Hinckley

Two parrots sitting on a perch, one says to the other ‘can you smell fish?'

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By *ehind blue eyes38Man
over a year ago

Market


"why do women give birth ? .................... cos it hurts and they deserve it

if it was men who had to give birth the world would end"

That's not funny at all.

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"At the moment, it is one of Phil Pagett's:

What idiot invented the speculum and didn't call it a flap jack? "
we brad a smiley with tears, I'm crying with laughter now

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By *argaryen starkCouple
over a year ago

pinxton

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes ? nothing you already told her twice

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By *argaryen starkCouple
over a year ago

pinxton

whats the difference between my ex wife and titanic ? only 1500 men went down on titanic

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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago

carrbrook stalybridge

Tettley recon the best way to make a cup o tea is to agitate the bag first .

So I slapped her arse and said " two sugars fatty and quick "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On arriving back at Cape Kennedy after the first successful lunar landings Buzz Aldrin gave a little speech about the epic event, thanking all those who made it possible and ended saying.... "and good luck Mr. Siemowicz". At the time most thought he was referring to one of the team involved with the Apollo craft but years later he was asked who Mr.Siemowicz was but didn't reply - it was only later after Mr.Siemowicz's passing that he recalled the tale of when he was playing ball in the garden as a child he heard his neighbours the Siemowiczs, arguing through an open window and Mrs. Siemowicz shrieking - "Oral Sex! You want Oral Sex!! You'll get that the day the boy next door walks on the Moon!!!"

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By *argaryen starkCouple
over a year ago

pinxton


"On arriving back at Cape Kennedy after the first successful lunar landings Buzz Aldrin gave a little speech about the epic event, thanking all those who made it possible and ended saying.... "and good luck Mr. Siemowicz". At the time most thought he was referring to one of the team involved with the Apollo craft but years later he was asked who Mr.Siemowicz was but didn't reply - it was only later after Mr.Siemowicz's passing that he recalled the tale of when he was playing ball in the garden as a child he heard his neighbours the Siemowiczs, arguing through an open window and Mrs. Siemowicz shrieking - "Oral Sex! You want Oral Sex!! You'll get that the day the boy next door walks on the Moon!!!""
this is a myth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 31/01/16 10:23:30]

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I'm liking Masai Graham's new joke. It's one that he put on facebook and everyone seems to be in the process of stealing it without actually crediting him with it, which is a bit rum.

I heard it was Ikea's 25th birthday the other day, so I sent them a cake. Well, 2 eggs, some flour and sugar plus a whisk....

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

It's unrepeatable in polite conversation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"!!!"this is a myth"

I thought this was a 'Joke thread'

and not an historical facts thread

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By *argaryen starkCouple
over a year ago

pinxton


"!!!"this is a myth

I thought this was a 'Joke thread'

and not an historical facts thread "
and whats funny about repeating something that never happened and claiming it as a joke ?

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By *ormalguy71Man
over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Self service checkouts: taking the embarrassment out of buying lube, condoms, and the Sun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"!!!"this is a myth

I thought this was a 'Joke thread'

and not an historical facts thread and whats funny about repeating something that never happened and claiming it as a joke ?"

Take it or leave it. Some think it humorous and others don't.

Do you apply the same criteria to all humour ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i should have asked him ....met him on the london to edinburgh train about 5 years ago

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

The human race

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whats the difference between a Prostitute and a Cadbury's cream egg?

It only costs 55p to lick out a cream egg

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