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By *unwithasub OP   Couple
over a year ago

sheffield

So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Leave it till the 2nd date,,,,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just be straight forward with it but give her options like start slow maybe 3 sum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?"

Lucky guy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why would you need to mention it? I'm assuming that she knows that this is a 'date' and not just a drinka dn that you have a husband?

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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago

North Cambs


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?"

Maybe just get into a bit of a relationship with this person first ..aren't you jumping the gun a tad?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?"

Who has the date? The man or woman? Does the girl know you have a partner?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?

Who has the date? The man or woman? Does the girl know you have a partner?"

Was ff

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By *unwithasub OP   Couple
over a year ago

sheffield

To clarify,

D has a date with the lady

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By *ittenandthepirateCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

If Craig or I (or both) have a date with someone, they know right from the beginning that we are poly as it's written on our dating profiles and we double check they've read it and are okay with it. I don't think it's fair to spring that on someone half way through a first date!

If she already knows what you are looking for and you mean you'd like to ask her for her views on it, I'd probably just ask how she feels about the concept but not mention anything about being part of your relationship just yet. If you like each other, see her a few more times and see where it goes. If it'll work as a poly triad, it'll happen naturally

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To clarify,

D has a date with the lady "

Is D the man? Does she know you are a couple?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you have been communicating with the lady for months and have never mentioned the fact your poly and looking for a 3rd to join , then I would think there is no point mentioning it on the date ,seems odd to be flirting for months but yet not discussing what ye want at all from this ?

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By *unwithasub OP   Couple
over a year ago

sheffield

Our interaction has been limited, it's a waitress at a coffee shop he goes to regularly, very difficult topic to bring up over the counter!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is be pretty pisses off if I hadn't been told before the date if I'm honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/01/16 17:25:40]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is be pretty pisses off if I hadn't been told before the date if I'm honest "

This phone!

I'd be pretty pissed off

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

She might be so lovely on a meet but a fucking nightmare to live with....

"WHARS ME FACKING BLOTTERS GONE? " of a Sunday luncheon.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Our interaction has been limited, it's a waitress at a coffee shop he goes to regularly, very difficult topic to bring up over the counter! "

I personally think most Women outside the swinging scene would tell you they are not interested, But if she has been giving you the right signals I think the best option is to be honest with her and say you have a partner who doesn't mind you dating other Women or maybe ask your partner to speak to her

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Our interaction has been limited, it's a waitress at a coffee shop he goes to regularly, very difficult topic to bring up over the counter! "

You can't go on a date with someone and just launch into this. Have a modicum of respect for the woman.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Anyone who brought up having a relationship on the first date would have me backing away slowly. See how it goes first!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Our interaction has been limited, it's a waitress at a coffee shop he goes to regularly, very difficult topic to bring up over the counter! "

Can we assume, as you seem to be dodging the question the woman think he is single?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Anyone who brought up having a relationship on the first date would have me backing away slowly. See how it goes first!"

Me too and that would be a monogamous relationship, bringing up the subject of polyamory with a third party I hadn't even met properly would have me running for the hills screaming.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Our interaction has been limited, it's a waitress at a coffee shop he goes to regularly, very difficult topic to bring up over the counter!

Can we assume, as you seem to be dodging the question the woman think he is single?"

Can you imagine how that conversation is going to go?

"I really like you, and so does my partner. We want you to move in with us both. Tonight!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone who brought up having a relationship on the first date would have me backing away slowly. See how it goes first!

Me too and that would be a monogamous relationship, bringing up the subject of polyamory with a third party I hadn't even met properly would have me running for the hills screaming. "

Maybe not screaming but with a look on my face,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?"

Wait does she know you have a partner?

If not youve started the whole thing out on a lie and people dont react well to "so btw i have a partner" on the first date if they dont already know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?"

Wait does she know you have a partner?

If not youve started the whole thing out on a lie and people dont react well to "so btw i have a partner" on the first date if they dont already know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?

Wait does she know you have a partner?

If not youve started the whole thing out on a lie and people dont react well to "so btw i have a partner" on the first date if they dont already know"

All things considered the fact that they've assumed that she's bisexual and open to a poly relationship with someone she's flirted with while at work and someone she's never met will probably make her reaction to the 'oh I've got a partner' conversation compartitively calm!

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

These coffee shop employees..

Naughty bunch

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By *enard ArgenteMan
over a year ago

London and France

Polyamory and swinging are not the same thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?"

Do you not think that you might be jumping the gun a wee bit?

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch


"So I have a first date with a girl who me and my partner are both attracted to who has been flirting with me for months, how to bring up the subject of a polyamorous relationship on a first date?

Wait does she know you have a partner?

If not youve started the whole thing out on a lie and people dont react well to "so btw i have a partner" on the first date if they dont already know"

I'm rather thinking the same , chatting for months you say ? Perhaps she is hoping for a bf ? She could end up most hurt ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As people are asking the op some questions, I would like to know....

Where is this coffee shop

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cut to the chase : take a Vicar and some cake with ya

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By *r and mrs sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

BOLDON COLLIERY

have a feeling the OP might be looking for a new coffee shop in the near future

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Polyamory and swinging are not the same thing.

"

But they can be compatible

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