FabSwingers.com forum: Evening Standard

By *lovis OP Man
over a year ago

Twickenham

n the early stages of a relationship, is there an ideal way to respond when asked, “how many previous lovers have you had?”

Researchers claim that ten is, in fact, the most pleasing answer for both men and women.

More than 1,000 people took part in an online survey for dating site IllicitEncouters.com, which asked how many previous bedfellows they would want a new partner to admit to having.

I'm

Between eight and 12 was the most popular answer, chosen by 38 per cent of women and 37 per cent of men.

The poll suggests those who had more than 10 sexual partners were considered promiscuous, while having fewer than 10 would be considered sexually inexperienced.

Men, in particular, were more wary of women who had a higher score than 10. Any number above 20 was considered a turn-off, according to the survey

People were also asked if they particularly wanted to know the truth about how many lovers a new partner had in the past when entering into a new relationship.

In response, 35 per cent of women said they would want to know a man's total, while 30 per cent of men wanted to know a woman's sexual history.

The news comes after it was revealed this week that British people are most likely to meet their lifelong partner at the age of 27.

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman
over a year ago

Burbage

I would rather tell a partner the truth and risk losing them than lie to them and always have that dishonesty between us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never asked anyone else, it's none of my business what they have done in their past. If I was asked I'd lie and say 4.

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By *inzi LTV/TS
over a year ago

The Garden of Eden in Beautiful North Wales

I'm generally more interested in the person not their past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've never asked anyone else, it's none of my business what they have done in their past. If I was asked I'd lie and say 4. "
.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men, in particular, were more wary of women who had a higher score than 10.

Score?! It's not an exam you get graded on!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/01/16 21:25:03]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely this depends how old they are?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did worry that my promiscuity would stop someone finding me attractive enough to be with romantically. I don't think it's wrong to find it unattractive that someone has had several partners, though they're not the type of person I'd associate with.

I'm glad I found someone who says he really doesn't care.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?"

Is this at age 27?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it just me that thinks that the answers to these kind of things are really situational?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?"

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would rather tell a partner the truth and risk losing them than lie to them and always have that dishonesty between us"

I did this after my ex husband demanded to know, and told me the number didn't make any difference!

Despite being in my late 20's my number wasn't that big.

However huge mistake! I had this used against me throughout the relationship! Really regretted telling the bastard!

Moral of the story...unless he is a swinger, don't tell any vanilla your true number!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm glad I found someone who says he really doesn't care. "

Doesn't care? There are lots of men on here who consider it a good thing. Nothing would spell divorce quicker for me than a wife who couldn't enjoy sex in a broad way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given. "

I just think ideal number of partners is going to be different depending on your age and other factors. If they don't collect that sort of data these things cant show any bell curve/ pattern or whatever so they don't really show anything. Just that that happened to the average answer for those people xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm glad I found someone who says he really doesn't care.

Doesn't care? There are lots of men on here who consider it a good thing. Nothing would spell divorce quicker for me than a wife who couldn't enjoy sex in a broad way. "

I only want a monogamous relationship though, so I'm one of the odd ones out here.

We still enjoy sex, just with only each other.

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

I hate these surveys. My desire to insist on "and a half" after my number always leads to a lengthy, and embarrassing discussion....

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given.

Largest age bracket for Match is 25-44. Most men are 35ish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive got a month to meet my lifelong partner..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What if the number is ....... I've no idea but it's a lot!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm glad I found someone who says he really doesn't care.

Doesn't care? There are lots of men on here who consider it a good thing. Nothing would spell divorce quicker for me than a wife who couldn't enjoy sex in a broad way.

I only want a monogamous relationship though, so I'm one of the odd ones out here.

We still enjoy sex, just with only each other. "

You went cold turkey huh? Whatever floats your boat. I remember my first visit to Chameleons and there was no turning back to monogamy after that (for me).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given.

Averages don't really mean anything anyway. I'll be there skewing the stats by meeting mine at 16.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I genuinely wouldn't ask.... But not sure I would tell either if a vanilla was asking?

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given. "

Hang on a mo, wouldn't that age be skewed by all the people who have already found their lifelong partner, so aren't on Match.com?

(Though I suspect they're less bothered about facts, and more interested in the free publicity...)

No, hang on, that doesn't work either, since surely no-one on Match.com has found their lifelong partner?

Buggar, now I've said 'Match.com' twice...

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By *irceWoman
over a year ago

Gloucester

"I'm generally more interested in the person not their past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given.

Averages don't really mean anything anyway. I'll be there skewing the stats by meeting mine at 16. "

I met mine at 13,we could really fuck them up. I'm divorced though,so I'm now a divorce statistic. My marriage lasted 30 years,so that probably fucks up divorce statistics too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given.

Hang on a mo, wouldn't that age be skewed by all the people who have already found their lifelong partner, so aren't on Match.com?

(Though I suspect they're less bothered about facts, and more interested in the free publicity...)

No, hang on, that doesn't work either, since surely no-one on Match.com has found their lifelong partner?

Buggar, now I've said 'Match.com' twice...

I hadn't thought of that. Perhaps Match.com could've just funded the survey, and a company like YouGov could've done it on their behalf?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyway, this is just a survey done to create content in order to create more high value links for Match.com. It's not a scientific article, it's just a marketing/SEO exercise that's kinda interesting.

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By *ingerrrrWoman
over a year ago

Meath

I've just tried to count up and I don't think I can get to a definitive number..

I'm sure there's others I've forgotten..

Does messing anout at a party count or does there have to be climax??

Think I'll just stick to 6.. Yeah that will do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just tried to count up and I don't think I can get to a definitive number..

I'm sure there's others I've forgotten..

Does messing anout at a party count or does there have to be climax??

Think I'll just stick to 6.. Yeah that will do.

There was one girl where I literally got in for about 8 seconds and then her boyfriend phoned her. She answered and didn't want to resume after he put a downer on it all. Does that count?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely this depends how old they are?

Is this at age 27?

It was a survey of 1,000. Match.com said people found "the one" most commonly at 27. No other specific ages were given.

Averages don't really mean anything anyway. I'll be there skewing the stats by meeting mine at 16. "

Averages are not what I mean sorry. I mean patterns in data. It means nothing unless it's gathered properly xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just tried to count up and I don't think I can get to a definitive number..

I'm sure there's others I've forgotten..

Does messing anout at a party count or does there have to be climax??

Think I'll just stick to 6.. Yeah that will do.

Wanna make it 7 and 8?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Me and my ex husband asked each other out of idle curiosity neither where bothered.

When may and I where discussing it it was comparing now many women he'd slept with compared to men but neither of us knew anyway how many.

But if your talking about sex with your partner guess it will come up at some stage guess it depends on why your asking

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By *ecretlyASoftieWoman
over a year ago

Hull but travel regularly

I was asked this by an ex and he got the huff because mine was more than his and caused a big row. If you can't handle an honest answer, don't ask!! Taught me not to answer the question anymore and I stopped counting. It got too many to count aoon after that anyway!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think this is important. There are people on this site who are well on the way to hundreds of partners and if I met one of them, fell in love with them it wouldn't bother me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't mind the numbers its if they are smart eg get tested and use condoms.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't even cross my mind to ask anyone as it's thier past..I'd be more Interested in them anyhow not thier past.

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Evening Standard - Sexual Partners Survey