FabSwingers.com forum: Things you'd never see on a fab tag line or status.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hey bored an thought this could be a laugh. What's a few things you'd never expect to see on a fab profile, like:

Sorry No single women and we mean No single women.

Its all about quantity not quality if you have a hole your my goal

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

I've just seen if my pussy is as big as a sky remote

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a male profile....

'Don't waste your time meeting me I can't get it up!'

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"On a male profile....

'Don't waste your time meeting me I can't get it up!'"

Haha he better have the best tongue in the world

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By *0hnnyBrav0Man
over a year ago

Great Wyrley

Its all about quantity not quality if you have a hole your my goal

This is going on my status now loool

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've just seen if my pussy is as big as a sky remote

Lol I wonder in she can change the channel with a good pussy clench

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Its all about quantity not quality if you have a hole your my goal

This is going on my status now loool"

Haha let us all.know if it works

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On anyones profile...

*I have a low sex drive*

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

The GUM clinic called me to go back would you like to cum as well

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lol how about not meeting I still have a hand and half a bottle of lube.

Just here for the pix

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Albino he/she seeks similar"

(credit to Jimmy Carr)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please look at my pics, its like a penis only smaller.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Haha nice ones guys.

We genuinely saw in a magazine date page ones. Cross dressing farmer with own tractor seeks similar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I cry everytime I ejaculate"

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Only here to keep my virginity

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm here to stay a virgin too.. An who don't enjoy a good cum cry haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Need a hand washing my cock. I'm not touching it, its fucking green

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My cock is orange.

My hobbies include eating cheesy wotsits and wanking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My cock is orange.

My hobbies include eating cheesy wotsits and wanking."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""I cry everytime I ejaculate" "

PMSL!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I need a real woman, someone who doesn't keep going down on me

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Happy Birthday Mum

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hahaha happy birthday mum that is soon wrong. Wonder how many people have found family on this site

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Its all about quantity not quality if you have a hole your my goal

Pretty sure I've seen that one.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

[Removed by poster at 01/01/16 18:11:41]

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

[Removed by poster at 01/01/16 18:12:19]

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Fuck it.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Fuck it."

I see that one all the time too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please send random friends request. I love pic hunters.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will meet unverified new site users with no pics and fill in later profile text only if you're between 18 and 99.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want someone to get me pregnant

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

I've got the flatulence almost completely under control now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I want someone to get me pregnant

Hehe seen so many people rage themselves ad breeders but no make me pregnant ones..

But soo funny lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please send random friends request. I love pic hunters."

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Is it my age why I can't get a meet? I am a young 99

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've seen this status

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its all about quantity not quality if you have a hole your my goal

Pretty sure I've seen that one."

Yes seen this too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey bored an thought this could be a laugh. What's a few things you'd never expect to see on a fab profile, like:

Sorry No single women and we mean No single women.

Its all about quantity not quality if you have a hole your my goal

Sorry dude but we have put both of those statuses up . After a spate of single bi fem meets we actually put a status up saying ' looking for fun tonight , but no single females '

And although the latter wasn't exactly as we put it , we have statuses like ' looking for a quantity of quality ' up quite often .

On the subject of what we are not likely to see , I guess a status like ' not meeting for the foreseeable future , just here for the chat ' hang on , no not that one .....

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By *rnyashellcplCouple
over a year ago

Haydock

Just went down on my sister n my mate was right, it is like low alcohol lager, it tastes good but it's just not fkn right

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By *r H and Good PetCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Just here for strings attached fun. If you have massive amounts of baggage, and cannot handle casual sex, message me.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Help me cheat whilst she's upstairs cleaning

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By *r H and Good PetCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I hate giving oral

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I am not the droid you are looking for.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just here for strings attached fun. If you have massive amounts of baggage, and cannot handle casual sex, message me. "

Haha brilliant. Although sure we all get that kinda message in our inbox from time to time

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I am not the droid you are looking for.

Dam I was sure you was the right DROID. .

The dark leader will be so pissed with me now going back empty handed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Man's status

Come girls be a bit more original than "hi how are you "...

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

I bloody like sex when I am on my period

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am not the droid you are looking for.

"
HaHa love it that one is perfect for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Small soft cocks only

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

I'm on the sex offender's register.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can only meet between 7am and 7pm due to electronic tag.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Hiv is not for Christmas it's for life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Happy Birthday Mum

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

I want to call you mother whilst I'm fucking you

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

Can all my previous meets contact their Doctor ASAP!!!

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By *eedsfun20152015Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Single guy looking for fun...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not u , it's me !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please DON'T read my profile before messaging me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

your maw never verified me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Playing STI bingo, I only need Clamidia.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about, "Yea it was 9 months ago our last meet and yes she is yours"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/01/16 23:18:50]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meet request.

Location : local church

Looking for : Anyone free for a couple of hours this Sunday, looking for someone to marry. Singles only please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dr tells me I have mouldy cock rot. If I have fucked you... opppsss

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By *iss Penny TrationWoman
over a year ago

"Small soft cocks only"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cock pics only, from 30 different angles. NO FACE PICS PLEASE!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only meet very short men .

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By *eedsfun20152015Man
over a year ago

Leeds

"Only meet very short men ."

haha

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By *iss Penny TrationWoman
over a year ago

"Cock pics only, from 30 different angles. NO FACE PICS PLEASE!!"

this haha

I'm using that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No messages more than 5 words please and only message me once you have copy and pasted the same message to 10 people before me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've taken some Imodium and I'm ready to meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Timewasters only please, don't message me if you are genuine!

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By *ongtalljonMan
over a year ago

North Wales

On a female profile....

Cum smash my back doors in

On a male profile....

Thanks for all the messages, please be patient while I read through them all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On a female profile....

Cum smash my back doors in

On a male profile....

Thanks for all the messages, please be patient while I read through them all"

Lololol...and if I haven't replied it means that I'm just playing hard to get and want you to keep messaging me until I reply.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hahaha thanks guys some of these had us in stitches..

Love the humour on this site. Was definitely worth the post hahah

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

Party tonight. Single guys free, single women and couples £50...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm going to do some of these!

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

"Cock pics only, from 30 different angles. NO FACE PICS PLEASE!!

this haha

I'm using that one "

Just actually laughed at the station

No lesbian photos just man on man fucking shits

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

On a ladies profile;

Looking for a guy to have a Threesome With me and my mother.

Just for my safety my dad accompanies me to all my meets and films them for his personal wank bank.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lol if anyone tries any of these even for just an hour I really wanna know what you get

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

Stars wanted for snuff movie...

Looking for a pair of single attractive bi-sexual ladies for our son's 16th birthday...

PTA seeks bikini clad car washers for Junior school fund raiser...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can fit a lynx can up my flange"

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

""I can fit a lynx can up my flange""

Or for a guy...

Anyone know where I can get a mini sky remote, so I can make my cock look bigger???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Only meet very short men .

haha"

You may laugh but neally all men in the north east are .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bareback only, we have STDs

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Would all the ladies and couples please stop begging me for a meet as I am pre booked 6 months in advance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please look at my pics, its like a penis only smaller."

Have you been watching Jarhead? Lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Youre an ugly bitch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone fancy pushing my piles back in?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone fancy pushing my piles back in?"
I'm coming to meet you but have to stop at chemist to get viagra

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Under veris ,I've known her for years she's ugly and her pussy tastes so bitter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pics of my anal prolapse available by request.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I need a real woman, someone who doesn't keep going down on me

Many men enjoy a real woman going down on them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seeking DP. The tummy bug is almost better.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"Cock pics only, from 30 different angles. NO FACE PICS PLEASE!!"

Slightly off topic but when my friend at the time put me on Fab all she put in my profile was "Send lots of cock pics"

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"Youre an ugly bitch

Nasty word that

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

Repent your sins and god will forgive you...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cock pics only, from 30 different angles. NO FACE PICS PLEASE!!

Slightly off topic but when my friend at the time put me on Fab all she put in my profile was "Send lots of cock pics"

Haha bet that worked a treat

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