FabSwingers.com forum: Depression

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Anyone know much about the facts of it or any advice on how to handle it for a friend weird thing to post on hear I know but theirs nice helpful people on here aswell

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By *otsoSnowWhiteWoman
over a year ago

My Ice Castle! South Wales

Depression comes in different forms and people cope with it different to others. There are loads of good websites that give advice on it, self help techniques etc. But all that should go hand in hand with help off a gp if your friend is willing to see one or has already seen one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

extremely debilitating, demoralising and a bloody awful thing to go through. Tablets might suppress the feelings, but won't cure it, psychiatric help has a better chance. Hell, even talking about it to a friend, anyone willing to listen will help, at least in the short term.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been through it on and off since my early twenties as stated above tablets will help short term to get through day to day and possibly spiralling downwards but your friend needs to find the route cause psychiatric help is best. Also I've always found getting fit helps too as exercise releases endorphins but its different for everyone. Your friend has let you in on how they are feeling and talking to someone is a start. Keep an eye on him/her over this time of year if its family related especially

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell then to get help from the GP initially. Sadly this always takes a long time so act promptly.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depression comes in different forms and people cope with it different to others. There are loads of good websites that give advice on it, self help techniques etc. But all that should go hand in hand with help off a gp if your friend is willing to see one or has already seen one."
my friend is trying to get back into the army nd is worried that getting help or going to a gp would ruin his career which I think is making it worse :/

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for people's advice helping me understand a bit better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for people's advice helping me understand a bit better "

It might affect him going back, depends what the problem is. But, if it does, then it's probably for the best anyway. Having been in the army and seen the damage it can and does cause, if he is depressed, the army most definitely isn't the place to be.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thanks for people's advice helping me understand a bit better

That's what I've said to him as I've been in nd now left it's probably not the best for him but seems to have his heart set on it nd got all his eggs in one basket nd thinks he'll be a failure if not trying to cheer someone up with so much negativity is quite hard :/

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Depression and weight loss have similarities of which approaches have the highest success rates. A combination of measures has lower levels of relapse in the longer term, based on population studies.

There are some things that we can do for ourselves and others where we benefit from outside help. Exercise can be very good for our emotional well being - if we're not motivated, that can be easier thought about than getting ourselves to keep at it though. It doesn't have to be gym type exercise to gain benefit though, walks etc are helpful.

There are many medication options today and being assessed by a GP is important. It hands some responsibility to them to look after you. The most commonly prescribed usually take some weeks to take full effect and we individually respond differently to them.

If medication is used, evidence suggests that we are better if we also have a therapy to help too. NHS therapy can take some time to secure, so private therapists may be great now. Some counselling is offered free by some organisations. I'd shop around for an approach that most attracts me.

Social support from friends etc is also something that depressed people lack in and may withdraw from.

Depression is an individual thing but I'd focus on treatment approaches that have wide success. Medication and therapy are the two elements to seek out, via diagnosis though anyone can initiate private therapy service.

Christmas can be a really tough time for those with depression, so continue your support for your friend.

If booking a GP appointment, I'd tell receptionists that one is needed urgently.

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By *helbeeCouple
over a year ago

Nuneaton

You can have good an bad days with depression esp if mixed with anxiety

It can be a dredfull thing to have

Excercise,getting out for a walk. Having a relaxing bath can help esp excercise as its the good feel factor an endorphins

Ive had a health scare recently an had to stop cardiovascular excercise ie step aerobics an a running machine.

I know when i was excerciseing i felt good an i got fit an toned.

Im hoping to get back to cardiovascular workout after Christmas

Im sure your friend will over come depression it takes time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depression comes in different forms and people cope with it different to others. There are loads of good websites that give advice on it, self help techniques etc. But all that should go hand in hand with help off a gp if your friend is willing to see one or has already seen one. my friend is trying to get back into the army nd is worried that getting help or going to a gp would ruin his career which I think is making it worse :/ "

I think it's more than 2 incidents of self harm where you become medically ineligible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The most common cause of depression is a feeling of low self worth (aside from those predisposed to depression due to inherited genes or due to a chemical imbalance)

Day-to-day depression is compounded by other factors in life that seem to consolidate a number of things;

A) a lack of control over ones future, associated with financial issues

B) a loss of worth through a break-up or losing a job

C) grieving; for a loved one or a past when things were better

Essentially each persons depression is different but what remains consistent are two things; catalysts and coping mechanisms.

Each person's catalysts that expedite or sustain their depression have a compounding effect. To resolve depression one must find the root cause of the depression, "what motivates one to be demotivated"? Once the root is discovered, coping mechanisms can be introduced to mitigate the root.

Someone mentioned exercise, any passion is good, it will release endorphins that will help tilt the chemical imbalance. However caution is needed, quick fixes (alcohol, drugs and even food), can be detrimental in the long term and unsustainable.

My advice is help your friend discover the root, or have a counsellor do the same, once the root (often completely unexpected) has been exposed, avoiding the things that "nag" at that root, can be built into a coping mechanism. Fundamentally, if depression is a constant in this persons life, then help from a professional is required. If the depression is inconsistent, then it is usually something we can manage with local support and life changes.

You mention your friend is ex forces and looking to get back in. It is possible that when leaving the forces your friend lost a huge chunk of his life, hence his desire to go back to it (though unfortunately this may not be the solution).

Help your friend find the root and together (and with others) work on how that root cause can be removed from his life.

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By *he Knight is YoungMan
over a year ago

22 Acacia Ave, Preston-for now

I suffer with PTSD as a result of my last job (confined space rescue) and my ex partner who abused me mentally and physically (broken bones,stabbed,her older kids threatening to kill me).

I've had CBT and counciling and now live in a safe house.

People say to me why didn't you fight back or leave ?

This kind of abuse lasted for 10 years and was a slow progression that after a bit I thought I was the problem and did think of taking my own life (nearly did).

I am happy again now and very single,never will I be in a situation like that again.

I still get depressed and have very dark days but now have my son with me as she attacked him and broke his wrist with a chair leg (a charming woman !).

We are both getting through the nightmare together and though he is my son he is my best friend aswel.

Don't dwell on the past as that is where it should stay,look forward to the future as it is your unwritten book to fill will happy memories.

Big love and huggs to all x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A friend sent me a clip of video from 2001 - probably the ONLY video of me from that time.

It was at the lowest of my depression and never realised but watching myself I could see how unwell I'd become. My eyes were glazed and lifeless like shark's eyes or something.

I was sleep deprived, poor eating habits and very depressed.

Since realised I've probably had elements of PTSD due to the horrors I experienced there.

It's a horrible thing. Get him as much help as you can.

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