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It always means so much...

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

…even the softest touch.

Those little shows of affection that your partner shows you, just how important are they to you? How much thought do you give them. For example, the little kiss before you head off to work, the holding of hands, the arm around your waist, snuggling up together in front of the tv etc.

Being the sad (envious) bastard that I am, I see couples when I’m out and about doing these kinds of things and I just wonder if what they’re doing actually means anything to them or if are they just going through the motions because it’s just seen as something that couples do.

Does the meaning of these little things fade over time? As a relationship goes on do they disappear altogether or even lose their meaning? If that’s the case, do you miss the little shows of affection?

I’ve never been in a long term relationship myself so my experience is limited but I know personally that I enjoy those seemingly insignificant moments more than pretty much anything else. Walking down the street holding hands for example always means a lot to me. Memories of those things never fade from my mind. And I know personally I would never take such things for granted. I miss the little things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My OH always says to me... It's the little moments that make up the big moments

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I imagine when it stops being fun, when you take things for granted then it's time to consider an alternative?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

One of "our" songs is a song called little things mean a lot and that's exactly how we are, its just us, the way we are. My son said one day you can tell you love each other cause your always smiling at each other.

Grand gestures are great but its the little things that you do constantly on a daily basis that count.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I can't speak for others... But yes the little things matter. A smile across the room or a kiss before you settle down to sleep at night.

We've been together nearly 16 years and I think some people mistake us for newly weds... We're very 'touchy feely' and always hold hands.

In fact I miss him now reading this as he's out at a jam session until early evening

Nita

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"One of "our" songs is a song called little things mean a lot and that's exactly how we are, its just us, the way we are. My son said one day you can tell you love each other cause your always smiling at each other.

Grand gestures are great but its the little things that you do constantly on a daily basis that count.

"

Like I said, I'm no expert but I believe this to be true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One of "our" songs is a song called little things mean a lot and that's exactly how we are, its just us, the way we are. My son said one day you can tell you love each other cause your always smiling at each other.

Grand gestures are great but its the little things that you do constantly on a daily basis that count.

"

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When we are out in company for the evening at a party or something we always have to sneak off for a few minutes to have a little cuddle when where at home where always touching or stroking or something walking by the chair and a little kiss on the cheek

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really really miss those little things. I think that to me they are the things that help cement a relationship. A look, a kiss. It's all about the shared intimacy. Maybe I'm just a soppy old girl!!! But this post has just made me cry!!! Sorry guys. Having an emotional day!!!

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"I really really miss those little things. I think that to me they are the things that help cement a relationship. A look, a kiss. It's all about the shared intimacy. Maybe I'm just a soppy old girl!!! But this post has just made me cry!!! Sorry guys. Having an emotional day!!! "

Awww you're not just a soppy old girl at all. I'm a soppy old git too! Don't tell anyone but I've been known to shed a tear over this stuff too. What you say rings so true for me. Shared intimacy is a good way to put it. I would happily take a walk, hand in hand with a woman right now over sex with her. I adore those little things and I miss them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I really really miss those little things. I think that to me they are the things that help cement a relationship. A look, a kiss. It's all about the shared intimacy. Maybe I'm just a soppy old girl!!! But this post has just made me cry!!! Sorry guys. Having an emotional day!!!

Awww you're not just a soppy old girl at all. I'm a soppy old git too! Don't tell anyone but I've been known to shed a tear over this stuff too. What you say rings so true for me. Shared intimacy is a good way to put it. I would happily take a walk, hand in hand with a woman right now over sex with her. I adore those little things and I miss them "

Aaaarrrrhhh thank you. Just blubbing a bit more now!! What I wouldn't give for a hug right now!! Oh well. The dog will have to do!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't miss those moments; in 30 years we were together I rarely experienced small gestures from him. No kisses,just cold cuddles because he wanted to feel wanted I think. He wasn't the romancer with me unless he was trying to make up for something really bad he had done or someone else told him he should do it. I thought it was his personality,but he does it with his new partner. It would be nice to experience it before all my teeth fall out

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"I really really miss those little things. I think that to me they are the things that help cement a relationship. A look, a kiss. It's all about the shared intimacy. Maybe I'm just a soppy old girl!!! But this post has just made me cry!!! Sorry guys. Having an emotional day!!!

Awww you're not just a soppy old girl at all. I'm a soppy old git too! Don't tell anyone but I've been known to shed a tear over this stuff too. What you say rings so true for me. Shared intimacy is a good way to put it. I would happily take a walk, hand in hand with a woman right now over sex with her. I adore those little things and I miss them

Aaaarrrrhhh thank you. Just blubbing a bit more now!! What I wouldn't give for a hug right now!! Oh well. The dog will have to do!! "

I haven't even got a dog! I'm sending you a virtual hug right now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't miss those moments; in 30 years we were together I rarely experienced small gestures from him. No kisses,just cold cuddles because he wanted to feel wanted I think. He wasn't the romancer with me unless he was trying to make up for something really bad he had done or someone else told him he should do it. I thought it was his personality,but he does it with his new partner. It would be nice to experience it before all my teeth fall out "

I know exactly where you're coming from!!! Mine was a 20 year relationship. I have had the feelings briefly since though. I'm hoping one day I'll have them again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"…even the softest touch.

Those little shows of affection that your partner shows you, just how important are they to you? How much thought do you give them. For example, the little kiss before you head off to work, the holding of hands, the arm around your waist, snuggling up together in front of the tv etc.

Being the sad (envious) bastard that I am, I see couples when I’m out and about doing these kinds of things and I just wonder if what they’re doing actually means anything to them or if are they just going through the motions because it’s just seen as something that couples do.

Does the meaning of these little things fade over time? As a relationship goes on do they disappear altogether or even lose their meaning? If that’s the case, do you miss the little shows of affection?

I’ve never been in a long term relationship myself so my experience is limited but I know personally that I enjoy those seemingly insignificant moments more than pretty much anything else. Walking down the street holding hands for example always means a lot to me. Memories of those things never fade from my mind. And I know personally I would never take such things for granted. I miss the little things.

"

This right here just restored a tiny bit of faith in the male race.... Thank you OP xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't miss those moments; in 30 years we were together I rarely experienced small gestures from him. No kisses,just cold cuddles because he wanted to feel wanted I think. He wasn't the romancer with me unless he was trying to make up for something really bad he had done or someone else told him he should do it. I thought it was his personality,but he does it with his new partner. It would be nice to experience it before all my teeth fall out "

What made you stick around so long?

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By *ivemeyoursoulWoman
over a year ago

Easter just around the corner!

I do miss the more intimate things,holding hands etc. Thankfully my 15 year old daughter still holds my hand at times when we're out,my 13 year old would rather be grounded for life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"…even the softest touch.

Those little shows of affection that your partner shows you, just how important are they to you? How much thought do you give them. For example, the little kiss before you head off to work, the holding of hands, the arm around your waist, snuggling up together in front of the tv etc.

Being the sad (envious) bastard that I am, I see couples when I’m out and about doing these kinds of things and I just wonder if what they’re doing actually means anything to them or if are they just going through the motions because it’s just seen as something that couples do.

Does the meaning of these little things fade over time? As a relationship goes on do they disappear altogether or even lose their meaning? If that’s the case, do you miss the little shows of affection?

I’ve never been in a long term relationship myself so my experience is limited but I know personally that I enjoy those seemingly insignificant moments more than pretty much anything else. Walking down the street holding hands for example always means a lot to me. Memories of those things never fade from my mind. And I know personally I would never take such things for granted. I miss the little things.

This right here just restored a tiny bit of faith in the male race.... Thank you OP xx"

Thank you very much

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

"

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like "

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it."

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk."

Not the case at all, I'm oblivious to anyone else around us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Over 35 years together and yes, the little things still mean a lot. Especially when he throws me his last rolo

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk."
really, you think holding hands in public is showing off. What do you think we do go round targeting people we think are single and start holding hands to rub there noses in it. I couldn't give a flying fuck what others think, I'm the one blissfully happy not whinging.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

And if you didn't spend your life gawping at people you wouldn't notice it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk.really, you think holding hands in public is showing off. What do you think we do go round targeting people we think are single and start holding hands to rub there noses in it. I couldn't give a flying fuck what others think, I'm the one blissfully happy not whinging."

Not the holding of hands, but I've seen some over the top public displays of affection which look so false it's embarrassing.

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk.really, you think holding hands in public is showing off. What do you think we do go round targeting people we think are single and start holding hands to rub there noses in it. I couldn't give a flying fuck what others think, I'm the one blissfully happy not whinging."

No!! I just said that tongue in cheek. I guess should have put a wink at the end of it. I do wonder if people are serious about what they're doing though sometimes. I was joking about the rubbing our faces in it bit!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk.really, you think holding hands in public is showing off. What do you think we do go round targeting people we think are single and start holding hands to rub there noses in it. I couldn't give a flying fuck what others think, I'm the one blissfully happy not whinging.

Not the holding of hands, but I've seen some over the top public displays of affection which look so false it's embarrassing. "
well there not little gestures then. I can't bare to see full on public snogging but this thread was about the small things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

19 years later and the little things still matter and we do them as much now if not more than we used to!

Sometimes its just a certain look, a squeeze of a hand or a random 'I love you' text when you are having a rubbish day!! X

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"I've never been like that with my two exes.

Maybe that's why we're not together anymore.

Miss I, would you like to come for a walk with me? We can hold hands if you like

I'm not a touchy feely person to be honest. Personal touches done in private between two people is romantic, done in front of others and I start to question for whose benefit are they doing it.

Well that's one of the things I mentioned in my original post. As an observer I do sometimes wonder why some people are doing these things in public. Sometimes I feel it's just showing off a little bit. Rubbing it in the faces of us sad single folk.really, you think holding hands in public is showing off. What do you think we do go round targeting people we think are single and start holding hands to rub there noses in it. I couldn't give a flying fuck what others think, I'm the one blissfully happy not whinging.

Not the holding of hands, but I've seen some over the top public displays of affection which look so false it's embarrassing. well there not little gestures then. I can't bare to see full on public snogging but this thread was about the small things.

"

That's right the full on snogging is definitely showing off a lot of the time. That I don't like to see. But yes, we were talking about those little things. Good point.

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"19 years later and the little things still matter and we do them as much now if not more than we used to!

Sometimes its just a certain look, a squeeze of a hand or a random 'I love you' text when you are having a rubbish day!! X"

That's true love in my book

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With my ex... probably the time I threw up on him just before we had sex - too much South African brandy - but he held my hair back when I was knelt over the toilet, then popped me in the shower, washed my hair, washed me, dressed me in one of his t shirts and cuddled me til I fell asleep. We weren't the affectionate type.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"19 years later and the little things still matter and we do them as much now if not more than we used to!

Sometimes its just a certain look, a squeeze of a hand or a random 'I love you' text when you are having a rubbish day!! X

That's true love in my book "

Couldn't agree more

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"With my ex... probably the time I threw up on him just before we had sex - too much South African brandy - but he held my hair back when I was knelt over the toilet, then popped me in the shower, washed my hair, washed me, dressed me in one of his t shirts and cuddled me til I fell asleep. We weren't the affectionate type. "

Hello stranger. You old romantic you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"With my ex... probably the time I threw up on him just before we had sex - too much South African brandy - but he held my hair back when I was knelt over the toilet, then popped me in the shower, washed my hair, washed me, dressed me in one of his t shirts and cuddled me til I fell asleep. We weren't the affectionate type.

Hello stranger. You old romantic you! "

I know

Well I did text you yesterday!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I tried explaining to my other half that it's the little day to day things that matter not grand gestures. He doesn't get it mores the pity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

20 yrs with one bloke then 3 yrs with another - the difference was amazing - just the first few weeks i realised how much those little things existed and never knew about before - and now with W - opening car door for you - carrying the shopping bag - simply just asking me if im ok - the ex was definitely awful

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"With my ex... probably the time I threw up on him just before we had sex - too much South African brandy - but he held my hair back when I was knelt over the toilet, then popped me in the shower, washed my hair, washed me, dressed me in one of his t shirts and cuddled me til I fell asleep. We weren't the affectionate type.

Hello stranger. You old romantic you!

I know

Well I did text you yesterday!"

I don't know who you texted but it wasn't me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree OP. I'd rather have a heartfelt message on a post-it note left on the bathroom mirror than an extravagant bunch of flowers. Holding hands, getting unexpected text messages, sharing simple everyday things is the way that intimacy develops. It's not all about getting laid.

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Oh crumbs this thread has made me miss being in a relationship

What I'd do for an evening of cuddles and snogs...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh crumbs this thread has made me miss being in a relationship

What I'd do for an evening of cuddles and snogs..."

Yep, me too!!

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By *uncpl83Couple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

It's not all about the touching or kissing for me but the unexpected txts just to say he loves me or the bath ran for me when I get home with a glass of wine on the side and a nice scented candle lit, the times he'll pop to the shop and come back with my favourite chocolate bar, how he is always there for me and stands by me (even when he knows I'm in the wrong) lol and how much of a fantastic father he is to our children! Everything about him basically, which is why I married him and I'm one very lucky lady!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I agree OP. I'd rather have a heartfelt message on a post-it note left on the bathroom mirror than an extravagant bunch of flowers. Holding hands, getting unexpected text messages, sharing simple everyday things is the way that intimacy develops. It's not all about getting laid. "

post-it-notes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My OH always says to me... It's the little moments that make up the big moments "

I very strongly believe this too x

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By *oward1978 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rotherham


"It's not all about the touching or kissing for me but the unexpected txts just to say he loves me or the bath ran for me when I get home with a glass of wine on the side and a nice scented candle lit, the times he'll pop to the shop and come back with my favourite chocolate bar, how he is always there for me and stands by me (even when he knows I'm in the wrong) lol and how much of a fantastic father he is to our children! Everything about him basically, which is why I married him and I'm one very lucky lady! "

Beautifully put Sounds perfect.

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