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i'd rather frig myself off. | |||
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Obviously wasn't as good as the OP because my poem got deleted | |||
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Lol  | |||
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"Bea utifull poem Cut an paste this bad boy and see what happens " | |||
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"It has become obvious from recent posts that us men are struggling to get responses from messaging women on this site. The usual advice (decent pictures, well written profile, original messages) just isn't working so I thought I would offer a new solution, guaranteed to work; poetry. Hi how are you doing today? I got veris from men &TV but I’m straight I say Seen your pictures and you look really hot Here darling take a look at my cock shot I’m very well endowed don’t you know Much, much bigger than your favourite dildo Not had much luck on here, my sex life’s quite dull But as the wise man says- patience, lol However if this offer you should decline It will be your loss and not mine Come now treacle don’t put up a fight Come on babe let us both meet tonight Of all the guys on here let me be your pick Can’t wait until you are sucking on my dick Hurry now, don’t leave your reply too late Just one thing though- I can’t accommodate Though I do have a car that was made in Spain So I could take you dogging down lover’s lane I know that good men on here are quite sparse But I’m a great guy, let me do you up the arse I’ve got all the banter and the Craic We could even do this thing bareback Or bring your sexy friend for a threesome Guaranteed to make me heavily cum Shaved all over so I’m not hairy like an orang-utan Could I bring my mates over for a gangbang Let’s go to a swingers club for some cavorting And maybe a spot of watersporting Will shag you so hard and leave you begging Perhaps even give me some cheeky pegging After all this fun I could be quite spent And now as the old saying went Roses are red and violets are blue I have cake and some Haribo too So sweetheart it seems you are in luck Fancy a fuck? " Haha made me chuckle. Xxx | |||
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"What if they don't wear knicker?   "well I don't hence why they never manage to make them drop hahaha | |||
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"What if they don't wear knicker? well I don't hence why they never manage to make them drop hahaha "Well what absorbs all the moisture ? | |||
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"I'm a fool for poetry. Do you do naked readings?" I'll do the reading, you do the nakedness!! | |||
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"Copy and pasted the poem to a potential playmate... Didn't work "Lol....you didn't?? | |||
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"In response .... You send me pics of your cock expecting to make my knickers drop ! I'm here for sex n fun not because I can't get none ... so send me pics to make me wet not pics of your bathroom or you covered in sweat . I like to get to know my guys not get told they wanna cum in my eyes So here is a clue to what I like a man that can go all night. Deffo not as good as op's but it made me chuckle writing it xx" There was a lady called Miss Watson From the wrong boys she got all the attention They sent her pictures of cocks Wearing nothing but socks In bathrooms too filthy to mention | |||
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" love it!"Hey gorgeous, not seen you in here before, how have I missed that cute smile in searches? | |||
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"In response .... You send me pics of your cock expecting to make my knickers drop ! I'm here for sex n fun not because I can't get none ... so send me pics to make me wet not pics of your bathroom or you covered in sweat . I like to get to know my guys not get told they wanna cum in my eyes So here is a clue to what I like a man that can go all night. Deffo not as good as op's but it made me chuckle writing it xx There was a lady called Miss Watson From the wrong boys she got all the attention They sent her pictures of cocks Wearing nothing but socks In bathrooms too filthy to mention" Very good but it should be pics instead of pictures to fit as a limerick | |||
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"In response .... You send me pics of your cock expecting to make my knickers drop ! I'm here for sex n fun not because I can't get none ... so send me pics to make me wet not pics of your bathroom or you covered in sweat . I like to get to know my guys not get told they wanna cum in my eyes So here is a clue to what I like a man that can go all night. Deffo not as good as op's but it made me chuckle writing it xx There was a lady called Miss Watson From the wrong boys she got all the attention They sent her pictures of cocks Wearing nothing but socks In bathrooms too filthy to mention" | |||
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You entice me with your words and Spanish car and you think that will get you far, you even speak of my sexy arse and clubs yet you never mention my love of back rubs.
Darling it's not hard to open my door
Oh sweetheart you can give me much more
I want your eyes, your voice, your touch before we fuck ...
Give me your kiss and when your hands are upon my breasts and Your mind so wild with what's to cum
I'll steal your Cake and Haribos and run and run and run
MWAH XX
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"Response to Your poem to me... Oh darling my heart is all a flutter and my question is ...do u do it with butter? You say you are straight and I know I'm hot - why do I need to look at your c ock shot? They are all so similar Taken from the angle below so we can see him grow .... A lean to to left and a lean to the right and some seem of belly button height! No luck on FAB you say Your sex life dull Yet it's this treacle's loss not to play? Oh come now darling .....we are fabulous FAB women The doorbells of pity don't ring and make us rock
You entice me with your words and Spanish car and you think that will get you far, you even speak of my sexy arse and clubs yet you never mention my love of back rubs.
Darling it's not hard to open my door
Oh sweetheart you can give me much more
I want your eyes, your voice, your touch before we fuck ...
Give me your kiss and when your hands are upon my breasts and Your mind so wild with what's to cum
I'll steal your Cake and Haribos and run and run and run
MWAH XX
"You can take my cake and haribos but don’t you run With our minds and bodies together we could have fun Anticipation building in both of us of what’s to come You will just have to promise not to tell my mum! Take you in my arms as I gaze into your big, blue eyes Distracting you whilst I have a cheeky grope of your thighs Trying to find the lock that is on your door With you how I long to score! People on the forum are reading this and on us betting Maybe you should see my cock pic- it’s what you’re getting! Now I run my hands all over your body Not forgetting the back rub- obviously Kiss you on your soft, sensual lips Move my hands down and onto your hips Tracing the outline of the curves of your body What will happen is going to be extraordinary Whisper in your ear and hear your Aussie voice Breathe in my aftershave (Brut)- what a good choice You should know now that I’ve never asked for pities I just really want to play with your big titties Now I move downstairs for a bit Just to have a little lick of your clit Very soon we will be in a sweaty, passionate muddle Bur afterwards I will always make time for a cuddle I know my Spanish car may be old and starting to knock But between us I’m sure that we can make it rock! | |||
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"It has become obvious from recent posts that us men are struggling to get responses from messaging women on this site. The usual advice (decent pictures, well written profile, original messages) just isn't working so I thought I would offer a new solution, guaranteed to work; poetry. Hi how are you doing today? I got veris from men &TV but I’m straight I say Seen your pictures and you look really hot Here darling take a look at my cock shot I’m very well endowed don’t you know Much, much bigger than your favourite dildo Not had much luck on here, my sex life’s quite dull But as the wise man says- patience, lol However if this offer you should decline It will be your loss and not mine Come now treacle don’t put up a fight Come on babe let us both meet tonight Of all the guys on here let me be your pick Can’t wait until you are sucking on my dick Hurry now, don’t leave your reply too late Just one thing though- I can’t accommodate Though I do have a car that was made in Spain So I could take you dogging down lover’s lane I know that good men on here are quite sparse But I’m a great guy, let me do you up the arse I’ve got all the banter and the Craic We could even do this thing bareback Or bring your sexy friend for a threesome Guaranteed to make me heavily cum Shaved all over so I’m not hairy like an orang-utan Could I bring my mates over for a gangbang Let’s go to a swingers club for some cavorting And maybe a spot of watersporting Will shag you so hard and leave you begging Perhaps even give me some cheeky pegging After all this fun I could be quite spent And now as the old saying went Roses are red and violets are blue I have cake and some Haribo too So sweetheart it seems you are in luck Fancy a fuck? " genius....Having a right laugh. Brilliant | |||
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I thought it might help break the ice between us.
Sadly I don't think she liked my introduction. Worth a try | |||
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My balls are heavy, so I write to you all,
i hope you are ready, bent over in the hall.
my wife doesn't know so you can be quite certain.
it won't be long before I wipe on the curtain..
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"way to long
My balls are heavy, so I write to you all,
i hope you are ready, bent over in the hall.
my wife doesn't know so you can be quite certain.
it won't be long before I wipe on the curtain..
"Great! Loved the last line. | |||
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"I think there is a trend Of that we can be certain Our pose is all too infectious Let us not be a burden Please wipe ur "spunk" On your own trunk And leave the curtains To be free of funk Mwah" well it wasn't an outright no  | |||
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"way to long
My balls are heavy, so I write to you all,
i hope you are ready, bent over in the hall.
my wife doesn't know so you can be quite certain.
it won't be long before I wipe on the curtain..
"Perhaps you are getting carried away Meets don't happen everyday But what will wife say if you wreck the place Maybe just cum on her face | |||
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"Hey there girl, yes you over there Don’t ignore me don’t you dare You know I’m the best thing on this site All the other blokes here are just shite Saw your profile and fabbed your pic So in return here’s a photo of my dick With a Sky remote as a guide To fit it all in you’d better open wide And see that I’m all trimmed beneath Now you won’t get pubes stuck in your teeth Just shows that I’m a considerate lover So why would you bother with any other? So come round and see me quick In no time you’ll be sitting on my prick Hurry up now you had better run So that I can stick it up your bum Sexy words in my ear you may gently whisper Whilst I lay back and fantasise about your sister Just keep the noise down when you cum We really don’t want to wake my Mum!! " Nailed it | |||
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