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90% Unread messages

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By *oger That OP   Man
over a year ago

essex

It is hard not to spam messages to females/couples when such a large proportion aren't read. I understand woman receive hundreds of messages and its impossible to read and reply to them all. But it is becoming impossible to write personal messages to females inserting their secret word or phrase to show you've read the profile and still not even getting a read.

If you want a life outside of Fab then Spamming is the only way!!! Woman shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand why women should moan about "hundreds" of messages. There are numerous filters to avoid this or they could actively search out and message guys themselves like I do, works perfectly for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you want a life outside of Fab then Spamming is the only way!!! Woman shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

"

Ok. How about this?

"If you want a life outside of Fab then mass deleting messages is the only way!!! Men shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

"

And just to note, we read and respond to all messages, often to the detriment of conversations that we actually care about. But your statement works both ways.

-Courtney

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"It is hard not to spam messages to females/couples when such a large proportion aren't read. I understand woman receive hundreds of messages and its impossible to read and reply to them all. But it is becoming impossible to write personal messages to females inserting their secret word or phrase to show you've read the profile and still not even getting a read.

If you want a life outside of Fab then Spamming is the only way!!! Woman shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

"

Do you mean sending the same or similar message to everyone? I actually can't see a problem with that as long as you remember to change the name or remove the "x". I think people expect too much from an initial message myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand why women should moan about "hundreds" of messages. There are numerous filters to avoid this or they could actively search out and message guys themselves like I do, works perfectly for me. "

WOW! U like the older guys huh? lol only 70 years to go and I'm in

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By *oger That OP   Man
over a year ago

essex

Yes it does work both ways i agree.

But mass deleting (although maybe essential sometimes) does not help the site. Spam messages does as it is just an olive branch to see if there's any interest. This seems to me as a fair way of trying to start a chat with people.

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By *oger That OP   Man
over a year ago

essex

Yes this is exactly what i mean... Expecting too much from an initial message!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes it does work both ways i agree.

But mass deleting (although maybe essential sometimes) does not help the site. Spam messages does as it is just an olive branch to see if there's any interest. This seems to me as a fair way of trying to start a chat with people.

"

I disagree with this. Sending mass messages to people does not help the site. You should look at profiles to determine whether you are compatible with someone. If everyone did that then there wouldn't be a need to send mass messages because most people don't meet most other people's requirements. I know we don't. I don't think we are an exception.

-Courtney

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Yes it does work both ways i agree.

But mass deleting (although maybe essential sometimes) does not help the site. Spam messages does as it is just an olive branch to see if there's any interest. This seems to me as a fair way of trying to start a chat with people.

I disagree with this. Sending mass messages to people does not help the site. You should look at profiles to determine whether you are compatible with someone. If everyone did that then there wouldn't be a need to send mass messages because most people don't meet most other people's requirements. I know we don't. I don't think we are an exception.

-Courtney"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys who clearly haven't read a person's profile and are not what the person is looking for spoil the site. Mass deleting wouldn't be so common if people took the time to actually read a profile before messaging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Those 90% of women are the ones who skim through the messages,picking out the hot ones. You don't want to meet shallow women like that anyway do you? Think of it as a filter

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By *aneandpaulCouple
over a year ago

cleveleys

We always delete. THE hi ones think i am worth more than that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes it does work both ways i agree.

But mass deleting (although maybe essential sometimes) does not help the site. Spam messages does as it is just an olive branch to see if there's any interest. This seems to me as a fair way of trying to start a chat with people.

I disagree with this. Sending mass messages to people does not help the site. You should look at profiles to determine whether you are compatible with someone. If everyone did that then there wouldn't be a need to send mass messages because most people don't meet most other people's requirements. I know we don't. I don't think we are an exception.

-Courtney"

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By *oger That OP   Man
over a year ago

essex

I don't mass message... I search genuine people i think i could get on with and like the look of. I read profiles, look at pics, often check the type of people they meet then if interested message them. But still more often than not its not read and then deleted.

This is time consuming and seems wasted. My point is, i can see why you would mass message. Maybe not to every person with in 100 miles as i agree that would ruin the site completely, but maybe get a half decent message then send it to 5 or 6 people you like and then cross your fingers.

Maybe semi-mass message would be more appropriate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It is hard not to spam messages to females/couples when such a large proportion aren't read. I understand woman receive hundreds of messages and its impossible to read and reply to them all. But it is becoming impossible to write personal messages to females inserting their secret word or phrase to show you've read the profile and still not even getting a read.

If you want a life outside of Fab then Spamming is the only way!!! Woman shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

Do you mean sending the same or similar message to everyone? I actually can't see a problem with that as long as you remember to change the name or remove the "x". I think people expect too much from an initial message myself."

Agreed!

If I was a guy I wouldn't even bother messaging people who expect you to write lengthy, original messages and use silly bloody code-words!

Being blatantly honest - if I don't find a guy attractive on his pics then no message from him, however original or well-written, is going to make me meet him!

What I think guys SHOULD do though is spend time writing a decent profile text - as evidence of a personality IS important!

If the profile text and pics are good - I don't really mind how short or standardised the message is!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't mass message... I search genuine people i think i could get on with and like the look of. I read profiles, look at pics, often check the type of people they meet then if interested message them. But still more often than not its not read and then deleted.

This is time consuming and seems wasted. My point is, i can see why you would mass message. Maybe not to every person with in 100 miles as i agree that would ruin the site completely, but maybe get a half decent message then send it to 5 or 6 people you like and then cross your fingers.

Maybe semi-mass message would be more appropriate."

Well, this sounds just fine.

-Courtney

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By *asycouple1971Couple
over a year ago

midlands

We find the copy and paste messages boring and tend to just delete them.

Also the hi how are you messages as well goes straight in the bin.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women are the biggest time wasters on here. They say read my profile,tick all my boxes,send a two paragraph opening message with the word CRUMPLEHORNGUTTERBLUSTER in so I know you read my profile. So,a man reads,ticks,writes,sends and his message is deleted. It would save so much time if the women put must look like *insert hot celeb name * and have a *insert dick size* and be educated to *insert qualification * and drive a *insert car name*. We should be more honest about what we want and not just have lists of what we don't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol dont worry about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Women are the biggest time wasters on here. They say read my profile,tick all my boxes,send a two paragraph opening message with the word CRUMPLEHORNGUTTERBLUSTER in so I know you read my profile. So,a man reads,ticks,writes,sends and his message is deleted. It would save so much time if the women put must look like *insert hot celeb name * and have a *insert dick size* and be educated to *insert qualification * and drive a *insert car name*. We should be more honest about what we want and not just have lists of what we don't. "

Great codeword by the way

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By *oger That OP   Man
over a year ago

essex

I think this is probably the best answer to this...

I have sent messages before saying, if you like these pics im happy to chat as much as you want!

I think generic "Hi, how how you doing blah blah blah" is time wasting. If i don't have the time i'm going to use the "Hi, do you like the look of me" approach..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand why women should moan about "hundreds" of messages. There are numerous filters to avoid this or they could actively search out and message guys themselves like I do, works perfectly for me. "

Me too although I don't even message people, if I ever see a message in my inbox I know I've got myself a forum timeout

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By *oger That OP   Man
over a year ago

essex

This is the best response... And your profile is exactly the profile i like..funny read!

I tried to test my new spam messaging on you, but obviously site supporters only. Ive done that before and got burnt!! Paid, messaged a site supporter only person.. and boom!! deleted with out a read. Worst £4.99 spent by me.


"It is hard not to spam messages to females/couples when such a large proportion aren't read. I understand woman receive hundreds of messages and its impossible to read and reply to them all. But it is becoming impossible to write personal messages to females inserting their secret word or phrase to show you've read the profile and still not even getting a read.

If you want a life outside of Fab then Spamming is the only way!!! Woman shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

Do you mean sending the same or similar message to everyone? I actually can't see a problem with that as long as you remember to change the name or remove the "x". I think people expect too much from an initial message myself.

Agreed!

If I was a guy I wouldn't even bother messaging people who expect you to write lengthy, original messages and use silly bloody code-words!

Being blatantly honest - if I don't find a guy attractive on his pics then no message from him, however original or well-written, is going to make me meet him!

What I think guys SHOULD do though is spend time writing a decent profile text - as evidence of a personality IS important!

If the profile text and pics are good - I don't really mind how short or standardised the message is! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/11/15 10:17:56]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes it does work both ways i agree.

But mass deleting (although maybe essential sometimes) does not help the site. Spam messages does as it is just an olive branch to see if there's any interest. This seems to me as a fair way of trying to start a chat with people.

"

I can see what you're saying, but the problem with 'spamming' is that there is a fine line between showing your interest and coming across pushy. I often do miss messages and when I'm pulled up about it I apologise and continue the conversation but when they come across pushy I just block xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just how it is, send a message and don't expect a reply then when u get 1 it feels more special.

Doesn't really annoy me

Arranging to meet then other person backing out and ignoring u without explanation is annoying

but hey ho. NOWT AS QUEER AS FOLK

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you want a life outside of Fab then Spamming is the only way!!! Woman shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

Ok. How about this?

"If you want a life outside of Fab then mass deleting messages is the only way!!! Men shouldn't moan as it is the just how it is, its not because we dont love you

"

And just to note, we read and respond to all messages, often to the detriment of conversations that we actually care about. But your statement works both ways.

-Courtney"

Fully agree with Courtney, this couple have always read messages when I've sent them, they must recieve hundreds of pointless crap messages. I've had to block men from mailing as I was getting the same, even though profile says straight people just don't take notice of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Women are the biggest time wasters on here. They say read my profile,tick all my boxes,send a two paragraph opening message with the word CRUMPLEHORNGUTTERBLUSTER in so I know you read my profile. So,a man reads,ticks,writes,sends and his message is deleted. It would save so much time if the women put must look like *insert hot celeb name * and have a *insert dick size* and be educated to *insert qualification * and drive a *insert car name*. We should be more honest about what we want and not just have lists of what we don't.

Great codeword by the way "

It rolls off the tongue don't you think

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land


"I don't understand why women should moan about "hundreds" of messages. There are numerous filters to avoid this or they could actively search out and message guys themselves like I do, works perfectly for me.

Me too although I don't even message people, if I ever see a message in my inbox I know I've got myself a forum timeout "

That's my fear with only friends being able to pm an unexpected message makes me think naughty step beckons

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Copy and paste messages tends to indictate someone is messaging everyone in their search. I can understand, if it obvious it's a spam message, that it gets deleted. My attitude would probably be, they're not really interretested in me, they'll fuck anyone.

If I send a message I never expect a reply and am pleasently surprised if I do get a response.

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By *mokes n MirrorsCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth and Newcastle (sometimes)

We read every message sent to us but it's not the quantity that pisses us off but the rude,crass and downright lazy attempts to get our interest. Our profile includes every bit of information needed to get the ball rolling including a size limit (we are a bit weightist) and we still get messages from people that have no chance whatsoever of meeting us.If people follow the profile 'rules' we'll message back a polite refusal (or occasionally a 'get your ass round here now'response) yet some time down the line they'll attempt another contact. We don't forget and even if we did the 'notes' facility and the fact it says how long ago we messaged you is on the side of your profile means an auto delete. A good profile and some good pics and actually reading the profiles of people before you hit the send button will greatly improve your chances and lessen your disappointments.

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By *izzyRascalWoman
over a year ago

North Hants

My profile is hidden for now as I was just getting way too many pointless messages. I absolutely hate when its just Hi or when you know they haven't read your profile (I don't have a password but you can still tell). Before I always tried to respond to every proper message even if just a polite no thanks but it would take up so much time. And there there were the guys who would come back again like "Why aren't you interested?". I now prefer to engage with the existing people I have or to reach out myself to new possiblities.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spamming to me implies you're just messaging any old person. Are there really sooooo many women and couples on here that you really, actually want to meet (as opposed to just getting your dick wet)?

But I agree with others that women shouldn't whinge about messages. Just block and do the messaging yourself if you can't be arsed replying to loads of messages from men (like I can't). Works for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How about this for a revolution everyone just uses the site the way they wish and stops trying to change how others use it. Men and women

It's a pointless exercise in time wasting...

Although some good advice on this thread x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got to disagree OP. When I was a newbie I did do the scattergun thing and messaged loads. It didn't work.

Now I rarely message anyone unless I really like the look of them and try to make sure that it's not a generic message and that its one specific to them.

You'll find if you take time to search and find specific people and target your messages you'll get a much, much higher response rate. They might not all end up with sex meets but at least you'll get your foot in the door with a higher chance of response and conversation starting!

Good luck fella!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes it does work both ways i agree.

But mass deleting (although maybe essential sometimes) does not help the site. Spam messages does as it is just an olive branch to see if there's any interest. This seems to me as a fair way of trying to start a chat with people.

"

A lot will click through and look at the profile and pics first before opening the message.

Do you think your profile shows you in the bets light? It will be seen far more often than your messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/11/15 12:05:59]

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