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New job at the zoo

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

A guy starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.

First is to clear the exotic fish pool of s. As he does so, a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade. Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat

anything.

...

Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps that pelt him with coconuts. He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both. What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything... He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.

He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South American Bees. As soon as he starts, he is attacked by the bees. He grabs the spade and smashes the bees to a pulp. By now he knows what to do and shovels them into the lions cage because lions eat anything.

Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. He wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like here?"

The lion says: "Absolutely brilliant!

Today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Interesting work if you can get it

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By *ushandkittyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

The version I heard at school had birds instead of fish, so it was finch, chimps and mushy bees

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Battered finch?

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Battered finch?

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By *ittle Pocket PerveWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

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By *olgate OP Man
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got excited to hear about someone's new job at the zoo.

So disappointed!

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Yikes. I think Arthur Askey wrote that one...

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