FabSwingers.com forum: A loved one farting :(

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How do you cope knowing, having heard, having smelled a loved one farting. Maybe the love of you life? Does it _educe the love you have for them? How can something so smelly come from someone so beautiful you think?!?!?

I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah. I'm filing my divorce papers at lunch.

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Eh?

You're a sensitive soul aren't you?

Nose picking on the other hand, would definitely make me pause for a moment and question their appeal......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't say I like it, but can't help laughing when it happens

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By *rs-Naughty_Mr-CuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Nr coleford

forever giving wife a dutch oven in bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not pleasant,but everyone does it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it can and should be done privately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I laugh when he does them. I never do them in front of him.

Doll x

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

It warms the bed up, so I don't mind too much

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you cope knowing, having heard, having smelled a loved one farting. Maybe the love of you life? Does it _educe the love you have for them? How can something so smelly come from someone so beautiful you think?!?!?

I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it

Weird as it sounds, I feel very similarly about this. I've thought about it many a time, and I think it may actually be down to me, in that I can idealise people so much, that I neglect to think about their standard, human habits, and as a result, even such simple human things such as farting can shatter those illusions I've put so much love into.

My advice would be, learn to accept that nobody's perfect, and true love comes with accepting someone as a whole, real world package.

...unless of course, we're talking flying face farts, anyone who does that never really loved you anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh for the love of god if you can't fart in front of a love one or whatever!! Better out then in that's what I say!!

It's like shitting in a public toilet why is it so frowned upon?! Everyone has to do it!! (However a use the disabled now and again if I have a bad bowel problem!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah. I'm filing my divorce papers at lunch.

-Courtney"

After drinking pints of I presume cider, I reckon Marc probably filed his first thing this morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh for the love of god if you can't fart in front of a love one or whatever!! Better out then in that's what I say!!

It's like shitting in a public toilet why is it so frowned upon?! Everyone has to do it!! (However a use the disabled now and again if I have a bad bowel problem!) "

Why would you use a disabled toilet if you have bowel problems?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh for the love of god if you can't fart in front of a love one or whatever!! Better out then in that's what I say!!

It's like shitting in a public toilet why is it so frowned upon?! Everyone has to do it!! (However a use the disabled now and again if I have a bad bowel problem!)

Why would you use a disabled toilet if you have bowel problems?"

To be quite open and honest about it, it stinks and well quite loud at times, the hand dryer doesn't always cut it! DISCLAIMER: I only use them if their quite and no one about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah. I'm filing my divorce papers at lunch.

-Courtney

After drinking pints of I presume cider, I reckon Marc probably filed his first thing this morning

Be quiet you! Divorce is a personal thing.

-Courtney

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By *oward1978Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

It's just a fart. Nothing to get upset about. There's worse things in life.

Would it be wrong (weird) for someone to say they quite like the idea of a woman farting?...Yes, I thought so. Just thought I'd ask the question

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's just a fart. Nothing to get upset about. There's worse things in life.

Would it be wrong (weird) for someone to say they quite like the idea of a woman farting?...Yes, I thought so. Just thought I'd ask the question

I love the fact you are so quirky about things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should embrace the situation and have a farting competition, you never know you may have fun and win too

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

"It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different"

I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No matter what they've done, I've done worse.

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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

That's love for you

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By *oward1978Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

"It's just a fart. Nothing to get upset about. There's worse things in life.

Would it be wrong (weird) for someone to say they quite like the idea of a woman farting?...Yes, I thought so. Just thought I'd ask the question

I love the fact you are so quirky about things

Thank you Miss I

Quirky eh?! I think other people may use different words to describe my 'interests'!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different

I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny

For you. Probably not who was giving.

Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.

I've been close when getting oral.

Not done it yet.*touch wood*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My husband once did one so bad that my instinct was to call him a Fucking prick!! Hardly grounds for divorce, but inc_edibly close! It's now my default thing to say when they are bad.

I do find it amusing that people are uptight about things like farting though.

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Really?

Wow!

I don't care about that stuff. If I love someone I love someone. I don't think bodily functions are a deal breaker. I'm not saying come in and have a shit while I'm in the bath but if you've gotta go then you've gotta go.

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

Even the Queen farts

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By *edMan
over a year ago

cambridgeshire

Surely if you live your other half you'd prefer then to fast occasionally rather than explode?!?

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

"It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different

I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny

For you. Probably not who was giving.

Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.

I've been close when getting oral.

Not done it yet.*touch wood*"

He found it funny too xD

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Really?

Wow!

I don't care, either. I was being facetious.

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different

I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny

For you. Probably not who was giving.

Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.

I've been close when getting oral.

Not done it yet.*touch wood*

He found it funny too xD "

tbh, I probably would've too.

And I'd plot my revenge for sure

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Really?

Wow!

I don't care, either. I was being facetious.

-Courtney"

I know... I was answering the OP!

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

"It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different

I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny

For you. Probably not who was giving.

Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.

I've been close when getting oral.

Not done it yet.*touch wood*

He found it funny too xD

tbh, I probably would've too.

And I'd plot my revenge for sure

He got his revenge by pushing me down a muddy hill... but really the only person it affected was him because his mum made him do the washing while she ran me a hot bath

The moral of the story... I have no idea but it was all pretty funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a natural thing

I fart, you fart, we all fart.

Just light a match.

Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different

I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny

For you. Probably not who was giving.

Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.

I've been close when getting oral.

Not done it yet.*touch wood*

He found it funny too xD

tbh, I probably would've too.

And I'd plot my revenge for sure

He got his revenge by pushing me down a muddy hill... but really the only person it affected was him because his mum made him do the washing while she ran me a hot bath

The moral of the story... I have no idea but it was all pretty funny "

That's just mean.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What follows is a link to an apt, and highly amusing video that you will enjoy. Please copy and paste it into the address bar of your favorite web browser.

https://youtu.be/S_YDmIq0cyg

And enjoy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to wait untill we're all snug, then fart on their leg and you get that 'parrrrrp' sound

Best pray you dont leave a little brown butterfly on their thigh though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I accidentally farted on my partner when I laughed during spooning. He said he'd never be able to look at me the same way.

It's natural and can't be avoided, I only ask he leaves the room to do it when it smells like his guts are dying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You should embrace the situation and have a farting competition, you never know you may have fun and win too

Sounds like the duelling farts skit family guy did!

But the loser could end up need fresh undies lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well we all do it and some more than others due to medical conditions such as I B S and a like but it can't be helped.

If someone feels comfortable in a relationship a fart should not cause a problem lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex loved one would walk ahead of me in an empty Asda aisle and fart. Unaware,I would walk through a mist of rotting flesh/bad eggs and almost throw up. By this time he had disappea_ed around the end of the aisle,leaving me with the evidence for people coming up behind me to point the finger at.

I would like to add that my little poofs rarely smell. I think it's because I drink a lot of tea and don't eat a lot of meat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My ex loved one would walk ahead of me in an empty Asda aisle and fart. Unaware,I would walk through a mist of rotting flesh/bad eggs and almost throw up. By this time he had disappea_ed around the end of the aisle,leaving me with the evidence for people coming up behind me to point the finger at.

I would like to add that my little poofs rarely smell. I think it's because I drink a lot of tea and don't eat a lot of meat. "

Ahh, the old 'gas claymore'

Wise man.....

And does tea filter farts?...I'd love if it did....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like to add that my little poofs rarely smell. I think it's because I drink a lot of tea and don't eat a lot of meat.

Ahh, the old 'gas claymore'

Wise man.....

And does tea filter farts?...I'd love if it did...."

I think tea produces wind but not of the smelly kind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

O i love how us men just embrace farting its natural you women should let them go

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I hear the have pills to make them smell like butterflies in spring meadow!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex never heard me fart, I always left the room, I suppose it was the way I was bough up, as a child we would get a slap if we farted in public, we was told to go and do it privately and that's something I've always done, my ex used to think I was nuts when I'd go to the bathroom every time I broke wind but its just something I've always done because I was made to from a very young age

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it

We both roll about laughing at each others anal trumpeting. The louder the funnier. If it stinks waft it at them. The look on their face if its unexpected is funnier still

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm 29 I have two kids and a mortgage and farts are still hilarious to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"forever giving wife a dutch oven in bed"

S always tries to do that to me too. He's only succeeded approx 3 times in 6 years!

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Och we can fart, burp and throw up in front of each other. Not all at the same time though. And we don't make a regular occurrance of it. But we are human. We eat curry. Sometimes they just sneak out.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When I met my partner he had never farted in front of anyone, soon brought him down to my level and he wins the farting competions.

Would draw the line at farting on a first date though, to me its just a sign of being comfortable around someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Really?

Wow!

Same here! Except I have been through the having someone coming in and having a shit while I'm in the bath while in a 1 toilet household

Hooray for the downstairs toilet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In church or chappell, let the bugger rattle. Just say excuse me and don't make a thing of it, I'd still wuff you.

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By *is_irtygirlCouple
over a year ago

somewhere out there

"My ex never heard me fart, I always left the room, I suppose it was the way I was bough up, as a child we would get a slap if we farted in public, we was told to go and do it privately and that's something I've always done, my ex used to think I was nuts when I'd go to the bathroom every time I broke wind but its just something I've always done because I was made to from a very young age "

Yep that sounds like me. To this day I try not to fart in front of others.

Him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it affect the love for them ?are you serious. It happens. We all do it, although I deny it

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By *essiCouple
over a year ago

suffolk

"It warms the bed up, so I don't mind too much

Lol lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it

It's best to fall in love with the a actual person rather than a sanitised ideal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

True love is when you can take a dump in each others presence.

Love me, love my shit (and shitty smell).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We both experience irritable bowel syndrome, so if we couldn't cope with each other fans farting, we'd be screwed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women's farts smell of roses anyway so it's all good

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By *al2001Man
over a year ago

kildare

I don't fart in front of people. Its very rude. I have two young teen boys and they don't either

Its how you're brought up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"O i love how us men just embrace farting its natural you women should let them go

Because a lady doesn't fart in public

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't bother me in the house

In public though ...

Especially if it's a ripper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol it gives me a chuckle when Mrs GNB farts...

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