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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady?" Red wine please, to drown my sorrows | |||
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"Can I have a slow comfortable screw against the wall please " *sloe | |||
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"Can I have a slow comfortable screw against the wall please " you can buy one get one free. limited offer. t&c's apply. | |||
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"G&T please. Double. " you can. but drink sensibly please, this is a respectable forum. | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady? Red wine please, to drown my sorrows oh dear. have some nuts on the house." Not sure that will help my sorrows after Sa lost, but will help my hunger | |||
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"Pint of Stowfords please! Are there any crisps or nuts??" a lady with red wine and sorrow took the last of the nuts. pork scratchings do? | |||
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"Can I have a slow comfortable screw against the wall please you can buy one get one free. limited offer. t&c's apply." Love a good BOGOF | |||
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"Pint of Amstel please barkeep! " you may have a tankard young squire | |||
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"Sparkling mineral water, ice and slice please " ding ding. attention bar. we have the nominated driver for tonight. | |||
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"Pint of Quager and a fizz bomb chaser please barkeep " coming up | |||
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"Cocktails for us tonight please xx " one or two umbrellas? | |||
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"Sparkling mineral water, ice and slice please ding ding. attention bar. we have the nominated driver for tonight." Yeah thats right - just because someone chooses not to drink they automatically become everyones free lift home... excellent. Thats so much fun for me, having to stay until everyone wants to leave as they get pissed. Reminds me why I don't often go to the pub. | |||
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"7 pints of peroni plz.... when you have done 7, do another 2 cos I would have had 2 bu then " bu then?? i think youve had enough. youre barred. | |||
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"I'm having a Jim beam black cherry and cherry Pepsi Max as we speak " please. no drinks from other bars in this establishment. | |||
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"Gin and Tonic with ice and a slice here" simple. done. | |||
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" a lady with red wine and sorrow took the last of the nuts. pork scratchings do?" Sorry I don't like it when you get a hairy scratching!! | |||
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"Pitcher of Mojito please, one glass " hmm can i see some id please? | |||
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"Can I have a pint of lager and what ever the beautiful lady is having.......if she ever turns up that is..... " lager and beer googles for later sir | |||
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"Dark rum and please " not served that in ages. a good choice madam | |||
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"I fancy some bubbles tonight Can I have some proseccco please " certainly. mind they dont go up your nose | |||
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"Rose wine plz x thank you " a large glass? | |||
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"I fancy some bubbles tonight Can I have some proseccco please certainly. mind they dont go up your nose" And a tissue please | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx" this is not val d'isere. | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. " certainly. straight up where madam? | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam?" Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like | |||
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" a lady with red wine and sorrow took the last of the nuts. pork scratchings do? Sorry I don't like it when you get a hairy scratching!!" Sorry I stole all the nuts | |||
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"Make mine a large pint of Smooth Cal" certainly sir. your seat at the end of the bar is reserved. | |||
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"I fancy a gin and tonic with pink grapefruit juice please " made your mind up? fancy or want? | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like" there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with." Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! | |||
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"G&t Plymouth gin ice slice in a tall glass please xx " very refreshing. | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together!" I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me? | |||
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"7 pints of peroni plz.... when you have done 7, do another 2 cos I would have had 2 bu then bu then?? i think youve had enough. youre barred." mfao...pisshed I fisnk nosht | |||
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"I fancy a gin and tonic with pink grapefruit juice please made your mind up? fancy or want?" You were too slow I've gone elsewhere | |||
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"pink grapefruit? just as well youve gone elsewhere. we dont want your kind in here. ruffians!" | |||
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"Don't think much of this bar. Still waiting for my drink from hours ago- would have died of thirst by now " Same here ,, tell you what I'll nip behind the bar and get us a bottle of red and we can share | |||
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"Don't think much of this bar. Still waiting for my drink from hours ago- would have died of thirst by now Same here ,, tell you what I'll nip behind the bar and get us a bottle of red and we can share " Make it a nice full-bodied red babe x | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. " you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds?? | |||
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"Don't think much of this bar. Still waiting for my drink from hours ago- would have died of thirst by now Same here ,, tell you what I'll nip behind the bar and get us a bottle of red and we can share Make it a nice full-bodied red babe x" Rioja reserve suit you madam ? Full boddied rich and fruity | |||
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"I'm happy, happy, happy. Can I have champagne with strawberries please? Xx" Looks like thr barkeeper is otherwise engaged. What are well celebrating tonight? Must be very good, champagne, strawberries coming up, shall I add some edible rose petals to up the mood? | |||
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"Don't think much of this bar. Still waiting for my drink from hours ago- would have died of thirst by now Same here ,, tell you what I'll nip behind the bar and get us a bottle of red and we can share Make it a nice full-bodied red babe x Rioja reserve suit you madam ? Full boddied rich and fruity " Very sorry for the wait, Rioja you say? Only the finest available here, two glasses, and a nice table over by the fire is available, do enjoy | |||
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"I'm in a red wine mood, bottle ta " Any preference of the variety? | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds??" Oh Suzy, I'll serve you, that sounds like a fabulous d*unk | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds?? Oh Suzy, I'll serve you, that sounds like a fabulous d*unk " Drink even | |||
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"Pinot please " Good choice, a large glass? | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds?? Oh Suzy, I'll serve you, that sounds like a fabulous d*unk " thankyou.. id appreciate it xx it is a lovely drink like alcoholic milkshake could i possibly have a straw so i can act like a big kid too | |||
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"Champers for me won a bit at the bookies so may as well, spread the wealth " I just served a lady the same, giod choice, any strawberries to complement it? | |||
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"I'm still on the g&t because I'm hanging onto the summer before I switch to winter drinks! " Ice and a slice | |||
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"Long Island iced tea please and a straw " Good call, crushed ice or normal? | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds?? Oh Suzy, I'll serve you, that sounds like a fabulous d*unk thankyou.. id appreciate it xx it is a lovely drink like alcoholic milkshake could i possibly have a straw so i can act like a big kid too " Anything for you, straw coming right up xx | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds?? Oh Suzy, I'll serve you, that sounds like a fabulous d*unk thankyou.. id appreciate it xx it is a lovely drink like alcoholic milkshake could i possibly have a straw so i can act like a big kid too Anything for you, straw coming right up xx" thankyou honey xx | |||
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"strawberrys and cream schnapps with milk and lots of ice please, make it a large one will you...pint glass will do..thanks xx this is not val d'isere. you mean your not serving me? wtf on what grounds?? Oh Suzy, I'll serve you, that sounds like a fabulous d*unk thankyou.. id appreciate it xx it is a lovely drink like alcoholic milkshake could i possibly have a straw so i can act like a big kid too Anything for you, straw coming right up xx thankyou honey xx " Your more than welcome | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water" Ice and lemon? | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? " Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself " Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar | |||
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"Cocktails for me too. -pornstar martini please xx " Oooh good choice, straw and an umbrella too | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me?" Yes please, men! | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar " I'll just wait until your hours are finished then get you d*unk | |||
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"Cocktails for me too. -pornstar martini please xx Oooh good choice, straw and an umbrella too " Yes pleeease xx | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me? Yes please, men!" Ahh, men indeed I had 15 hotties let me down earlier on the field of play. Another vodka for you? | |||
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"Cocktails for me too. -pornstar martini please xx Oooh good choice, straw and an umbrella too Yes pleeease xx " Xoming right up xx | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar I'll just wait until your hours are finished then get you d*unk " Ah now there's an offer | |||
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"Ive got some Russian standard platinum.vodka open.. Slurp" Ah we taking that straight or with a mixer? | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me? Yes please, men! Ahh, men indeed I had 15 hotties let me down earlier on the field of play. Another vodka for you? " Yes pleas large! I've had four this week let me down | |||
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"Two slippery nipples for us please " Most certainly, coming right up | |||
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"Two slippery nipples for us please Most certainly, coming right up " well thankyou | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me? Yes please, men! Ahh, men indeed I had 15 hotties let me down earlier on the field of play. Another vodka for you? Yes pleas large! I've had four this week let me down " Extra large vodka coming up, they obviously were not good enough for you, hopefully a good man will come along quickly for you | |||
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"Two slippery nipples for us please Most certainly, coming right up well thankyou " Your welcome | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me? Yes please, men! Ahh, men indeed I had 15 hotties let me down earlier on the field of play. Another vodka for you? Yes pleas large! I've had four this week let me down Extra large vodka coming up, they obviously were not good enough for you, hopefully a good man will come along quickly for you " I hope so | |||
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"Vodka straight up. Need it. certainly. straight up where madam? Well as I'm not getting lucky now and where you like there's a lady with a large wine i think you could sit with. Show me!! We can drown our sorrows together! I'm drowning my sorrows with wine, care to join me? Yes please, men! Ahh, men indeed I had 15 hotties let me down earlier on the field of play. Another vodka for you? Yes pleas large! I've had four this week let me down Extra large vodka coming up, they obviously were not good enough for you, hopefully a good man will come along quickly for you I hope so" So do I for you | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar I'll just wait until your hours are finished then get you d*unk Ah now there's an offer " Just gonna perv the barrista until the bar closes | |||
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"Oi bar drinker! Werz mi beerz from erleyer " What number are we on now Marmite? | |||
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"Oi bar drinker! Werz mi beerz from erleyer What number are we on now Marmite?" 12 | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar I'll just wait until your hours are finished then get you d*unk Ah now there's an offer Just gonna perv the barrista until the bar closes " A barrista is a expert coffee maker, im a connoisseur of alcochol beverage making lol | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar I'll just wait until your hours are finished then get you d*unk Ah now there's an offer Just gonna perv the barrista until the bar closes A barrista is a expert coffee maker, im a connoisseur of alcochol beverage making lol " But perve away | |||
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"I'll take a tonic water Ice and lemon? Yes please and another glass of red wine for yourself Ahh thanks, I best take it easy though, can't be d*unk behind the bar I'll just wait until your hours are finished then get you d*unk Ah now there's an offer Just gonna perv the barrista until the bar closes A barrista is a expert coffee maker, im a connoisseur of alcochol beverage making lol " Connoisseur of alcohol now consumer of alcohol later | |||
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"Oi bar drinker! Werz mi beerz from erleyer What number are we on now Marmite? 12 " Good night for you then Hope your enjoying it | |||
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"Whiyz yooz pikkin onz meee juzt coz I loike a dwink todai ...hic" Lol, is it a celebration? Or just a social night? | |||
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"Half a pint of larger and a packet of crisps please. " Only half?! Any particular flavour. I have the whole range | |||
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"Workiin ard at gettin pessit " Sounds fair enough, it is a Saturday after all | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz " Any lemonade to complement it? | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz " With you there fella, two straws please! | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz With you there fella, two straws please!" Certainly, 2 straws it is | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz With you there fella, two straws please!" Yeah let's race with a straw | |||
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"NOOOO! NEVER spill a good drink! Does this bar serve food? T bone well done and chunky chips if its on the menu " T-bone well done, sacrilege lol, chunky chips yummy, I can do that for you certainly | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz With you there fella, two straws please! Yeah let's race with a straw " I'm good with a straw, strawnado anyone?! | |||
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"I'm in a red wine mood, bottle ta Any preference of the variety? " Malbec please circa 2001 would be great! | |||
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"Thanks, im starvin! Bordalise sauce too? " Bernaise sauce will be served in the jug on the side just for you | |||
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"I'm in a red wine mood, bottle ta Any preference of the variety? Malbec please circa 2001 would be great! " Certainly, I like youe choice | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz With you there fella, two straws please! Yeah let's race with a straw I'm good with a straw, strawnado anyone?!" Whats strawnado? | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady?" Have you got any decent ale on? | |||
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"I gotta go for a lay down, rhe sourhern comfort straw race has gone to my head.... " I'll keep the steak warm for you until your ready | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady? Have you got any decent ale on? " I have a range tonight, Doom Bar was proving popular on the forums earlier, or something else tickle your fancy? | |||
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"Be about 1:30 when I get back up (finish work) lol " It will be waiting | |||
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"Baileys on ice please... " Ooh yummy, my favourite winter drink for some reason, good choice | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady? Have you got any decent ale on? I have a range tonight, Doom Bar was proving popular on the forums earlier, or something else tickle your fancy? " I might have found something else to tickle my fancy I am actually drinking another from the Sharps range as i type! Although i do like a nice Black Sheep - dont we all? | |||
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"Is your pool table open for playing on?and can we have two more slippery nipples please " Yes it is open, just try not to stain the felt lol. Of course, skippery nipples coming right up | |||
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"Is your pool table open for playing on?and can we have two more slippery nipples please Yes it is open, just try not to stain the felt lol. Of course, skippery nipples coming right up " Skippery nipples?? I meant slippery nipples | |||
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"Is your pool table open for playing on?and can we have two more slippery nipples please " WHOA WHOA WHOA back it up Pedro - i have a £1 down on the table. Winner stays on | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady? Have you got any decent ale on? I have a range tonight, Doom Bar was proving popular on the forums earlier, or something else tickle your fancy? I might have found something else to tickle my fancy I am actually drinking another from the Sharps range as i type! Although i do like a nice Black Sheep - dont we all? " Who doesn't like a nice black sheep Ooh glad youve foubd something you fancy | |||
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"Cup of tea and a couple of biscuit please. " Certainly, milk and sugar? | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady? Have you got any decent ale on? I have a range tonight, Doom Bar was proving popular on the forums earlier, or something else tickle your fancy? I might have found something else to tickle my fancy I am actually drinking another from the Sharps range as i type! Although i do like a nice Black Sheep - dont we all? Who doesn't like a nice black sheep Ooh glad youve foubd something you fancy " Mind those Slippery Nipples sounded nice | |||
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"rugby has finished until tomorrow. what will it be squire/m'lady? Have you got any decent ale on? I have a range tonight, Doom Bar was proving popular on the forums earlier, or something else tickle your fancy? I might have found something else to tickle my fancy I am actually drinking another from the Sharps range as i type! Although i do like a nice Black Sheep - dont we all? Who doesn't like a nice black sheep Ooh glad youve foubd something you fancy Mind those Slippery Nipples sounded nice " Yes they do don't they | |||
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"Just checking.... What time is last orders??? " When you all pass out lol | |||
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"would love a cheesy bell end right about now" I have cheesy wotsits behind the bar somewhere, will they suffice? | |||
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"Baccardi and , if one is offering" Most definitely, large with ice? | |||
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"A frosty IPA please landlord! " Ipa coming up, will a chilled glass be OK for you? | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz With you there fella, two straws please! Yeah let's race with a straw I'm good with a straw, strawnado anyone?! Whats strawnado?" Bottle of wkd, a straw drink it in one! | |||
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"Baccardi and , if one is offering Most definitely, large with ice? " That would be fantastic | |||
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"Those skippery nipples are going down very well,do you have any chalk for my cue please,and one of those rest things?i can't quiet get my leg over,thankyou " I'll search for the chalk, do you need help with the leg over? And whilst we're at it, another round? | |||
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"Lol.... beer took so long im stone cold sober again! Right.... southern comfort by the bottle plz With you there fella, two straws please! Yeah let's race with a straw I'm good with a straw, strawnado anyone?! Whats strawnado? Bottle of wkd, a straw drink it in one!" Nit had a bottle that since I was a uni, brings back memories lol | |||
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"Baccardi and , if one is offering Most definitely, large with ice? That would be fantastic " Not a problem, coming right up | |||
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"Oh yes please,some more slippery nipples please,and a step ladder if you have one handy, hubby seems to have disappeared " All the more nipples for you in that case | |||
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