FabSwingers.com forum: Doe's and don'ts for the first meet??

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi were a new couple on fab & have no experience meeting anyone..

We have been chatting to a nice guy that were planning on meeting At the weekend For a chat and all going well some mmf fun...

Just wanted to know from people's experiences where is best to meet for the first time and any suggestions for what is best to arrange for the night...

Thanks for any serious comments

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this is a really personal question and difficult to answer because it really depends on what you want from the meet.

My best advice would be to talk about what you are OK with, and what you aren't. We were very communicative with our first meet, and it went really well as a result (also a single guy).

I hope you have lots of fun!

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do whatever you feel comfortable with! Relax and enjoy. Too much planning can ruin a meet.

Hope it goes well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best to meet for first time in a club or a social place, that way if things dont go to plan you can still have a good night out.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Do meet in public

Do discuss your hopes and expectations beforehand

Do try to relax

Don't give out addresses

Don't do anything you're not comfortable doing.

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Don't have too high expectations

Don't get d*unk

C...

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By *imply_SensualMan
over a year ago

Widnes

Best to meet with no expectations to start - you might not like each other when you meet……

Have a plan if things go well, either back to yours, a hotel or a club, but spell out the limits and boundaries for you all before you start.

Make sure you have condoms, some guys might 'forget' theirs.

Have a plan B if you don't like each other, then you can still have a decent night out.

Have a great time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have a quiet drink beforehand. When I introduced a new man to one of my fwb he was very nervous. I felt it was my duty to put him at ease. He had spoken to my friend by phone message previously so we all kind of new what to expect. Altogether none of us had strict boundaries. Your dynamics will be different. Make sure you're crystal clear about what you all want and are willing to do. Hope it goes well

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi thanks all for the really good advice... We have been chatting all week in a group chat on kik and we all get along really well.. We have all discussed what we all want from the meeting and all getting to know eachother.. He seems like a very nice clean respectful hard working guy that seems very honest. As we don't want to give are mobile numbers to any one etc

Were unsure weather to meet at a pub for a chat first or just invite him over to the house for a chat and a brew then see what happens naturaly and what we all have discussed what we would like etc trying to avoid a bad experience I guess

Thanks again guys xxxx

xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi thanks all for the really good advice... We have been chatting all week in a group chat on kik and we all get along really well.. We have all discussed what we all want from the meeting and all getting to know eachother.. He seems like a very nice clean respectful hard working guy that seems very honest. As we don't want to give are mobile numbers to any one etc

Thanks again guys xxxx

xxxx

I would recommend meeting in a public place, first. Its up to you, but meeting in public is safer and there is always the possibility that you don't get along....

-Courtney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not to put a dampener on things but be aware, they might not turn up but if this does happen, don't let it out you off Fab because plenty do turn up.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not to put a dampener on things but be aware, they might not turn up but if this does happen, don't let it out you off Fab because plenty do turn up.

Good luck

Looking at their profile I would submit that IF he failed to show, it would be not only disrespectful and your typical definition of time-wasting, but it would be HIS loss.

I have a lot of respect for people who put time in to their meets and conduct themselves properly, and no time for those whom believe game playing is acceptable.

I second the advice given by other posters re: meeting in a public place, somewhere warm and atmospheric but not too noisy as it's a barrier to communication, then see where things go and what materialises.

Good luck, hope the meet goes well.

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By *moothies.Couple
over a year ago

Woodthorpe

Sounds like a positive start but always meet for a coffee or drink somewhere neutral first. Not everyone is as honest as you'd like them to be and may have sent photos that were taken a little longer ago than you'd imagine!

Hopefully you won't have that problem

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By *errible_TwoCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

When we first started out we always met for a social drink on the first meet and never played we found this easier so we could go away and talk together about if we liked or disliked them then arrange for a play if all was happy, we always use to like to plan out what would happen in a meet but our expectations of what we wanted never happened but now we just go with the flow and enjoy the night and if we want to do something new and are happy with ppl we are playing with we will ask them if they are interested in trying with us, we have rules and we stick to them and we make sure the others are aware of them too even tho once we thru one rule out of the window on a meet but we were happy with them to do that and have discussed it since and now have that rule for selected ppl, but like others have said try to relax and enjoy yourself and don't get d*unk, it's not attractive and you will regret it, we aren't drinkers but we have been with ppl who got wasted and we had to leave as I got injured cos of it

Have a good meet and I hope everything goes well x

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By *moothies.Couple
over a year ago

Woodthorpe

Mrs Smoothie has already posted, but to add to it.

Meet somewhere neutral first and only progress if you are both happy with the situation. Don't let the person you're meeting put you under any pressure to do something you're not quite sure about. If there are any doubts, leave it as a social and go away and talk to each other. Then if you decide to progress, arrange a play date.

If the guy is honest and genuine, he will respect your decision. If he's not, then you're probably better off without him.

The first time can be very exciting and tempting, but can cause problems if one of you isn't sure.

Take your time and enjoy the whole experience.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi thanks for all the really helpful comments we have decided to all meet for a drink in a pub first to chat then if all goes well, were all going to just relax and not plan anything and see where the night goes

Hopefully this will be the first of are naughty adventures

Thanks again all

Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As others have said, always meet in a public place first.

Discuss between yourselves how far you are prepared to go for your first time and back each other up, if either of you feel uncomfortable with going any further.

If the guy is as genuine and as honest as he seems he should make sure you are both happy before progressing. Not enough to spoil the mood, but enough to reassure and be reassured himself.

Most of all....have fun! Good luck and enjoy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do meet in public

Do discuss your hopes and expectations beforehand

Do try to relax

Don't give out addresses

Don't do anything you're not comfortable doing.

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