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"tesco"

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By *pecialized OP   Man
over a year ago

newcastle/northumberland

I was standing in a queue in Tesco's.........

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought i was going to have a heart attack laughing so hard

Stupid cow..........why else would I buy dog food?

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By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

best one i have heard in ages

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By *pecialized OP   Man
over a year ago

newcastle/northumberland

thank ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol what are you guys like lol .... paul once put a multi pack of condoms and one of those vibrating cock rings into an old ladies basket and followed her to the checkout .... OMG I couldn't look when the assistant asked were they hers and then had to explain when told no lol debs xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my husband is a sod for doing this

when we are at the checkout he stands at one end and puts the shopping on the conyeor belt and i stand at the other end and pack the shopping

when he gets to the salad stuff he holds a whole cucumber up in the air and shouts "love love" i turn round and shout what and in the loud voice so everybody can hear him he says

"did you get the batterys for this"

he did it once and there was a young girl on the till poor sod didnt know where to look

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By *pecialized OP   Man
over a year ago

newcastle/northumberland

classic im gonna try that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"classic im gonna try that

"

lol hes a sod for doing it im use to it now and just play along

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was standing in a queue in Tesco's.........

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought i was going to have a heart attack laughing so hard

Stupid cow..........why else would I buy dog food?"
very funny..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

haha ive never laughed so much in my life..u lot r great

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