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"Dear PSA, how do I persuade a bloke who isn't interested in me to meet me and shag me senseless? Ta muchly." You never told me you're interested in me?!! | |||
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"Please take a ticket and wait in line. Ticket number one....... Question; Pervs and timewasters, how do you deal with them? Answer; If you don't like people looking at your photos, don't have any on your profile. If you don't want the hassle of timewasters don't send messages or read any sent to you. If you don't want people to look at your profile, delete it. NEXT......." Why didnt you just write this reply on the persons thread  | |||
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"Dear PSA, how do I persuade a bloke who isn't interested in me to meet me and shag me senseless? Ta muchly." Dear VV I assume you've tried sending "fancy a fuck" messages and pictures of your foof? That's always a great place to start. If that's not working, try relentless messages until he weakens. Most men are oblivious to subtlety and frequently miss hints and flirtations. Alternatively, fuck his friend and make him jealous. | |||
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"Dear PSA Why is it when the pooch is up the world is up lol . And what's a lay in ?? Lol "Dear Taff. The body clock of a pooch is seldom aligned with that of the human counterpart. This is often true of all animals. I myself was awoken at 6am with a furry pussy on my face. Have you considered obtaining another pooch? This may help as the body clocks of two pooches will align, in much the same way as a house full of women will eventually all synchronise their "special times". There is no such thing as a lay in, it's an urban myth. | |||
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"Oh, you did....carry on " 
The Green arrow is your friend. | |||
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"Oh, you did....carry on
The Green arrow is your friend. "the green arrow sounds like a superhero | |||
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"Where is milton keynes' parkrun and where do i Park lol Tried looking on the website and can't work it out, even my mum can't work it out and she's lived here for 30 years!! "Good morning Evie Milton Keynes parkrun can be found by turning left at the first roundabout, straight across the next one, 3rd exit from the next one, 1st exit at the next, 2nd left at the one after, 5th exit at the next. You'll find it just down the road on the right. After taking the 4th exit at the next roundabout. | |||
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"dear PSA, is there a cure for imbecility? I think I might have contracted this during my school years "Dear mistermac I believe you have spelt imbecility incorrectly..... As we all know, this is not your responsibility. It's the fault of the teachers and the government. The fact that you failed to pay attention, take notice of your teachers or complete your homework is not your fault. I believe you have a compensation claim here and suggest you consult a legal professional. | |||
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"dear PSA, is there a cure for imbecility? I think I might have contracted this during my school years
Dear mistermac
I believe you have spelt imbecility incorrectly.....
As we all know, this is not your responsibility. It's the fault of the teachers and the government. The fact that you failed to pay attention, take notice of your teachers or complete your homework is not your fault.
I believe you have a compensation claim here and suggest you consult a legal professional.
"Thank you wise PSA, I will get right on learning how to spell imbecility, and contact claims direct, or that underdog thing, right away  | |||
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"Dear PSA Why can't I get a shag? Sincerely Frustrated X" Dear Punk Mist I must admit to being a tad stumped by your conundrum. I can see no reason why you can't get a shag. It could be that you are far far away and the geography of your area doesn't have many fab members. I suggest you turn off all of your filters and lower your standards. Also, and I appreciate this isn't wholly professional, but I'd be happy to shag you if we were closer. Editors note; there is no doctor/patient privelidge here, there has been no breach of the hypocratic oath...... | |||
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"Dear Markoh Why have I awoken with a snotty nose and feeling poo this morning when I am due to go on holiday on Monday and need to get all my laundry done today? Miss VS x " Dear Miss VS This is a common problem. When busy, the human body stores illness enabling us to continue our duties without failure. When we have free time the body senses this and releases stored illness as it knows we have "time" to be ill. I can only hope that your snotty nose doesn't get worse, you may contract manflu...... | |||
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"Dear Markoh Why have I awoken with a snotty nose and feeling poo this morning when I am due to go on holiday on Monday and need to get all my laundry done today? Miss VS x " As an aside, there is a forum thread where the poster wants to purchase dirty knickers. I suggest you contact him as this may ease the amount of laundry you need to do. | |||
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"Dear PSA Is there any truth in the fact, that if you fall asleep with your headphones on you can get brainwashed, I once fell asleep with the telly on the QVC channel and when I awoke I had the urge to buy tat! I say this as I feel asleep last night listening to a Tony Blair speech on peace in the middle East and now I have the urge to buy a back pack and go to his next speech in person! "Dear sexy bum. This is true. You have been brainwashed. Clearly you are easily influenced. Close your eyes, relax and listen to my voice...... Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money". Don't forget your pin number.... Aaaaaaaaaaand wake up!!!! Cured. | |||
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"Dear Markoh Why have I awoken with a snotty nose and feeling poo this morning when I am due to go on holiday on Monday and need to get all my laundry done today? Miss VS x Dear Miss VS This is a common problem. When busy, the human body stores illness enabling us to continue our duties without failure. When we have free time the body senses this and releases stored illness as it knows we have "time" to be ill. I can only hope that your snotty nose doesn't get worse, you may contract manflu...... " Dear Markoh I shall heed your advice and ensure I keep away from all Men for the next 48 hours so as not to contract such a debilitating and life threatening disease whilst my defences are low and my knickers are receiving sky high bids on fleabay Kind regards and thanks Miss VS | |||
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"Editors note; there is no doctor/patient privelidge here, there has been no breach of the hypocratic oath..... I believe you are taking advantage now! Fab people are genuinely looking for advice.. and your just thinking of getting yourself laid. Do you think this is a swingers site? "Oooooh look, a squirrel, over there!!!!!! Phew, think I got away with that..... | |||
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"dear PSA, is there a cure for imbecility? I think I might have contracted this during my school years
Dear mistermac
I believe you have spelt imbecility incorrectly.....
As we all know, this is not your responsibility. It's the fault of the teachers and the government. The fact that you failed to pay attention, take notice of your teachers or complete your homework is not your fault.
I believe you have a compensation claim here and suggest you consult a legal professional.
Thank you wise PSA, I will get right on learning how to spell imbecility, and contact claims direct, or that underdog thing, right away "All advice given here is free of charge. No commission required. Good luck with your claim. Be aware, you may be setting a legal precedent. It's possible future that your efforts are recorded in the history books and be read by future generations. But then again maybe they won't be read.... | |||
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"Dear Markoh Why have I awoken with a snotty nose and feeling poo this morning when I am due to go on holiday on Monday and need to get all my laundry done today? Miss VS x Dear Miss VS This is a common problem. When busy, the human body stores illness enabling us to continue our duties without failure. When we have free time the body senses this and releases stored illness as it knows we have "time" to be ill. I can only hope that your snotty nose doesn't get worse, you may contract manflu...... Dear Markoh I shall heed your advice and ensure I keep away from all Men for the next 48 hours so as not to contract such a debilitating and life threatening disease whilst my defences are low and my knickers are receiving sky high bids on fleabay Kind regards and thanks Miss VS " Happy to have helped, enjoy and have a super holiday. Achooooooooooooo. Agh bollocks. | |||
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"Dear PSA Is there any truth in the fact, that if you fall asleep with your headphones on you can get brainwashed, I once fell asleep with the telly on the QVC channel and when I awoke I had the urge to buy tat! I say this as I feel asleep last night listening to a Tony Blair speech on peace in the middle East and now I have the urge to buy a back pack and go to his next speech in person!
Dear sexy bum.
This is true. You have been brainwashed. Clearly you are easily influenced.
Close your eyes, relax and listen to my voice......
Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money".
Don't forget your pin number....
Aaaaaaaaaaand wake up!!!!
Cured.". Unfortunately I've been fleeced already by QVC but I'm now in possession of 4 steam mops and some lovely spangely costume jewellery | |||
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"Dear PSA, What does the A stand for? " Dear Little Pocket Perve. I suspect it's a corruption of the thread title; public service information has been bastardised into public service announcement. I'm guessing the poor souls sending in their questions are so stressed, so confused at the depth of their problems they are unable to read with any clarity. | |||
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"Dear PSA, Why is it that the plural of fungus is fungii, but the plural of penis is penises? "Dear Testarossa This is an easy one to answer. It is nothing more than a quirk of the English language. Which is in fact has its origins in Greek and Egyptian. This may on the surface be confusing, just consider English the cross bred mongrel of languages. | |||
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"Dear PSA Is there any truth in the fact, that if you fall asleep with your headphones on you can get brainwashed, I once fell asleep with the telly on the QVC channel and when I awoke I had the urge to buy tat! I say this as I feel asleep last night listening to a Tony Blair speech on peace in the middle East and now I have the urge to buy a back pack and go to his next speech in person!
Dear sexy bum.
This is true. You have been brainwashed. Clearly you are easily influenced.
Close your eyes, relax and listen to my voice......
Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money, Send Markoh all of your money".
Don't forget your pin number....
Aaaaaaaaaaand wake up!!!!
Cured..
Unfortunately I've been fleeced already by QVC but I'm now in possession of 4 steam mops and some lovely spangely costume jewellery "There is a plus side to this; your house will be scrupulously clean and you'll look pretty when you go out later. Win win. | |||
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"dear PSA, is there a cure for imbecility? I think I might have contracted this during my school years
Dear mistermac
I believe you have spelt imbecility incorrectly.....
As we all know, this is not your responsibility. It's the fault of the teachers and the government. The fact that you failed to pay attention, take notice of your teachers or complete your homework is not your fault.
I believe you have a compensation claim here and suggest you consult a legal professional.
Thank you wise PSA, I will get right on learning how to spell imbecility, and contact claims direct, or that underdog thing, right away
All advice given here is free of charge. No commission required.
Good luck with your claim. Be aware, you may be setting a legal precedent. It's possible future that your efforts are recorded in the history books and be read by future generations. But then again maybe they won't be read...."In which case, it needs translating into grunts and pelvic thrusts so our degenerated ancestors can understand... ... ... ... And maybe me too haha | |||
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"Dear PSA, What does the A stand for? Dear Little Pocket Perve. I suspect it's a corruption of the thread title; public service information has been bastardised into public service announcement. I'm guessing the poor souls sending in their questions are so stressed, so confused at the depth of their problems they are unable to read with any clarity. " Although at least one of us just can't read.... I'm pretty sure that's me | |||
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"Dear PSA, What does the A stand for? Dear Little Pocket Perve. I suspect it's a corruption of the thread title; public service information has been bastardised into public service announcement. I'm guessing the poor souls sending in their questions are so stressed, so confused at the depth of their problems they are unable to read with any clarity. Although at least one of us just can't read.... I'm pretty sure that's me "I don't think you were the first. | |||
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"Dear PSA, What does the A stand for? Dear Little Pocket Perve. I suspect it's a corruption of the thread title; public service information has been bastardised into public service announcement. I'm guessing the poor souls sending in their questions are so stressed, so confused at the depth of their problems they are unable to read with any clarity. Although at least one of us just can't read.... I'm pretty sure that's me
I don't think you were the first. "Yeah, I just claim incompetence on my own behalf | |||
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"Dear PSI, How come the East Midlands region on here is only slightly smaller than Asia? Yours in anticipation, Confused of Cloud Cuckoo Land." Good evening Ace Fab takes its geography from books, which as you know are printed flat, as opposed to a globe which is well, erm, globey. When viewed on a globe the world can be viewed in scale, so we see an accurate representation of one place against another. When printed in an atlas all the pages are the same size and we can't accurately view one place against the other in perspective. We look at the UK on a globe, turn it round and see immediately the size and distance corrolation. You don't get that in an atlas. England is on page 6, France is on page 147. Also, the UK can be drawn to scale on one page, Asia cannot, so the proportional scale is wrong. Asia and England both fit on the same size page. This is why fab geography is inaccurate. | |||
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"Surgery is closed until 12.30. Please take a ticket and wait in line. The management thanks you for your patience. Here's some nice hold music......" sits patiently listening to the hold music... turns out it's a 30 second snippet of Mars Bringer of War by Gustav Holst | |||
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"Surgery is closed until 12.30. Please take a ticket and wait in line. The management thanks you for your patience. Here's some nice hold music...... sits patiently listening to the hold music... turns out it's a 30 second snippet of Mars Bringer of War by Gustav Holst" Greensleaves next......  | |||
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