FabSwingers.com forum: You stink!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How does one go about telling a work colleague that their personal hygiene isn't really up to scratch? But do do it in a way to not cause offence? Should I just get d*unk and tell them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Drop a note in their handbag? Or put in their locker etc?

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

No idea! Not a pleasant experience and no real nice way to say it, just don't go directly squirting them with air freshener

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A perfume/aftershave/anti-perspirant gift set for their Secret Santa if you can wait that long x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

This is really, really difficult and when I worked with someone with that problem I'm afraid I chickened out. Is there an HR department? Could you ask them for advice?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It should come from their direct line manager

I'd that's not you then have a quiet word with who is,

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By *o-jCouple
over a year ago

Outskirts of Notts

Accidentally spray them with the fire extinguisher ?

Jo x

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

It's a really difficult conversation. I found that the best way was to be kind but straightforward.

I took the colleague somewhere quiet and asked if they were alright as it didn't appear that they were taking care of themselves as well as they used to. I added that if I was getting smelly I would want to know.

It worked for a about a week.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It could be a medical condition.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"It's a really difficult conversation. I found that the best way was to be kind but straightforward.

It worked for a about a week. "

This is the mature and kindest approach.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We used to work with a woman that had smelly feet. Used to stink the office out. Sadly I think she knew as she used to spray them with perfume and stuff so we chickened out of saying anything....it's such a delicate situation and chances are the person already knows and is embarrassed about it.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

i have had to do it and it is not easy, especially as it was a young girl i had to tell.

Do you have a good relationship with them currently? if not is there someone who does that could perhaps help as it is often better hearing these things from someone you are close too rather than an acquaintance etc.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

I had a girl who I was responsible for once, stunning lady, however she had a problem, at home..

Think don't embarrassed about it and discuss it as a behavioural situation, not an identity, there will be no problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just pull some spray out and say here try this its really nice. Then spray myself. Job done without telling them they stink

Peach

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"We used to work with a woman that had smelly feet. Used to stink the office out. Sadly I think she knew as she used to spray them with perfume and stuff so we chickened out of saying anything....it's such a delicate situation and chances are the person already knows and is embarrassed about it."

The woman I worked with wasn't aware, the problem went away when they had a shower installed instead of a bath and she was prepared to spend the five minutes it took to shower.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once worked in an office where a member of the day shift (I worked nights but there was an overlap) had dreadful flatulence. The seat took the worst of it and his colleagues took to spraying the seat while he was away from the desk. I never found out if he was aware of it and just chose to ignore it but everyone steered well clear of that particular desk. Kinda felt sorry for him cos he was a nice guy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How does one go about telling a work colleague that their personal hygiene isn't really up to scratch? But do do it in a way to not cause offence? Should I just get d*unk and tell them? "

Seriously I'm a whimp and fully admit it

I'd tell my manager its then their place to deal with any complaints

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"No idea! Not a pleasant experience and no real nice way to say it, just don't go directly squirting them with air freshener

I said this tongue in cheek but back in the nineties this is what some people did, so the line manager had to get involved and offer to buy them new shirts etc and asked them to get up earlier than their daughters so they had time in the bathroom, but it is a difficult situation to have but sometimes you just have to bite the bullet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had exactly this issue at our place of work and to be honest with you mate, there is very very little you can do, if you tell tuem and they take it the wrong way you could end up with being accused of bullying, at our place it was a guy who stank, to the extent that guy's couldn't eat their snap in the restroom, we told our gaffer no end of times but to no avail.... As it turned out he left anyway. But yes a very horrible position to be in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm one of the people that had to be told. I genuinely didn't realise I was smelly until I had been told about it. Wasn't the nicest way, especially seeing as how it was my manager at the time during a meeting. But I shower regularly now, and yet I have no idea how to broach the subject with my current team leader.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I'm one of the people that had to be told. I genuinely didn't realise I was smelly until I had been told about it. Wasn't the nicest way, especially seeing as how it was my manager at the time during a meeting. But I shower regularly now, and yet I have no idea how to broach the subject with my current team leader."

How would you have preferred to have been told? There can't be a good way of course but the least bad way.

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

I 1s bought a work colleague a bottle of mouth wash. Hos breath was fucking toxic it worked but i ended up on bullying charges i mean wtf it was true hows that bullying least i told the smelly twat unlike the rest of the sheep

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

"It should come from their direct line manager

I'd that's not you then have a quiet word with who is,"

We did this. The smell in summer was unbearable!!

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By *eforfuncplCouple
over a year ago

Morecambe

Just be straight .......

Wtf is the smell in here !! Smells like a dead rat xxx everyone will/should think fook is it me ??? Xxx

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Just tell them you used to be smelly and you're grateful someone told you how to fix it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Start by giving a nickname such as stinky Pete or pepe le Phew.

Then drop subtle hints Like, Christ on a bike ever heard of deodorant.

If that fails, just by a desk fan and always makesure your upwind.

But I am a builder and we not known for being subtle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a tough one, and I hope you can get it resolved because I know how difficult it can be. I used to work in an office with a gent who stank of stale urine and it was a really difficult situation as he did have a colostomy bag. So I did some research and discovered a smelly bag was either leaking/not fitted properly or wasn't being properly cleaned. Myself and 7/8 colleagues eventually got to a point where we had to complain to HR as it was getting worse and worse and was making working there really unpleasant...we even stated in the complaint we were concerned for his health as there was a risk of infection if there was an issue with the bag. We were all basically told off like playground bullies and told we had to put up and shut up...I found a new job not long after as I couldn't continue to work in an office that made me feel physically sick.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just be straight .......

Wtf is the smell in here !! Smells like a dead rat xxx everyone will/should think fook is it me ??? Xxx

Smells like bigfoots dick!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How would you have preferred to have been told? There can't be a good way of course but the least bad way."

I would have preferred them not to have said I reek in front of 20 of my colleagues and two other manager's personally. The awkward silence that followed was horrible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How does one go about telling a work colleague that their personal hygiene isn't really up to scratch? But do do it in a way to not cause offence? Should I just get d*unk and tell them? "

I had this same issue with a bloke I worked with. I took the forward approach and cornered him in the locker room. "Ere mate whack some of this on and use my spare shirt, you stink like a donkey, you just come out the gym or something?". Went down well, he still stinks and I ain't got my shirt back.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

How would you have preferred to have been told? There can't be a good way of course but the least bad way.

I would have preferred them not to have said I reek in front of 20 of my colleagues and two other manager's personally. The awkward silence that followed was horrible"

That was unkind and unnecessary and must have been awful for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/07/15 22:14:25]

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The teacher at a local school told all the kids in her class to start bathing every day as they stink of puberty.

I don't know if they've taken it seriously but they were all talking about it.

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

Sadly in the company I work with, they just bundled a bloke and doused him with deodorant. They are not mature or subtle, no one did anything either.

I was not present when this happened.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Sadly in the company I work with, they just bundled a bloke and doused him with deodorant. They are not mature or subtle, no one did anything either.

I was not present when this happened."

people can be really horrible can't they.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Sadly in the company I work with, they just bundled a bloke and doused him with deodorant. They are not mature or subtle, no one did anything either.

I was not present when this happened."

That's horrible.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Be sensitive, do it privately and show concern but be direct and let them know the effect upon you. Also try to fathom why they have the problem. Poor home, broken shower, gets up too late for cleansing, clothes not cleaned, cant afford energy etc. You may be able to help find a solution.

As they may have a medical condition, be sure that you're reasonable and supportive. It may be a symptom of something else, such as depression. As long as you deal with it directly, you won't be giving them employment concern, which HR involvement might.

I usually assume that someone may have had hell at home and I wont make things worse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm willing to take one for the team - I'll not shower for a week and see how people tell me at work. I'll then report back with my preferred method.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Could I text from an anonymous number?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could I text from an anonymous number? "

How about an anonymous note with letters cut out of the newspaper. It spares your blushes talking to them and brings with it a sinister aire of "SoRt youRSElf OuT yoU StinKY PerSoN"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is really, really difficult and when I worked with someone with that problem I'm afraid I chickened out. Is there an HR department? Could you ask them for advice?"

We have one guy that stinks out the whole floor of his workplace. But he insists on keeping the door open to his office! Not just a B.O. smell, its a mixture of B.O., clothes that have become musty from not being stored sufficiently dry, wet dog (he has about 6), and a sort of cheesy smell. Some days he's worse than others. But he is the HR manager!! When he started, he shared an office with the M.D., a few weeks later the M.D. found him an office in a separate building. Mine!!! And he has no idea about social interaction or personal space, you REALLY don't want to end up sat next to him in a meeting.

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