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whats the best joke a child ever told u?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

when i was 8 i used to tell everyone this joke i never knew what it meant but i told the old women at the bingo hall:

How do you get 6 pounds of meat out of a fly?

Unzip it

By far the best ever though was told to me by my daughter last week:

Q. whats the difference between a bird and a fly?

A. a bird can fly but a fly cant bird

I was well impressed

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

From a 12 year old... "£90 isn’t a lot for a pair of trainers"

Well it made me laugh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"From a 12 year old... "£90 isn’t a lot for a pair of trainers"

Well it made me laugh."

makes me wanna cry.

"What did the dog say when it sat on sandpaper?"

"Ruf ruf"

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

not really a joke but it had me and my sister in stitches

my nephe wwas thinking of things he wanted for christmas when he turned round and said

'dont worry if its lots of pennies mummy cos if it is we can just ask Granddad to buy it'

we have taught him well

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a frog.

...no, I didn't get it either but we dutifully laughed like banshees!

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By *ast and modifiedCouple
over a year ago

near glasgow


"when i was 8 i used to tell everyone this joke i never knew what it meant but i told the old women at the bingo hall:

How do you get 6 pounds of meat out of a fly?

Unzip it

By far the best ever though was told to me by my daughter last week:

Q. whats the difference between a bird and a fly?

A. a bird can fly but a fly cant bird

I was well impressed "
what bees give milk? boobees was the reply

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By *ugartitsandhimCouple
over a year ago

North West

2 Flys in the airing cupboard which ones in the army ..................................................................................................The one on the TANK

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"2 Flys in the airing cupboard which ones in the army ..................................................................................................The one on the TANK "

was a joke on one of those noel edmunds shows where he talks to kids a few yrs back

one cute looking 8 yr old girl asked him how you make a snooker table laugh, he shook his head and asked , her reply was "stick your hands in its pockets and tickle its balls"

was a classic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My 5 year old loves her only joke

what did the rug say to the carpet ?

stay down ive got you covered

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Not the best but worst my son came out with this when he was about 12

What do santa claus and michael jackson have in common? They both come in childrens bedrooms. I wasnt a happy mother

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"My 5 year old loves her only joke

what did the rug say to the carpet ?

stay down ive got you covered

"

classic, i might use that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Next doors little girl asked me…… What did the elephant say to the crocodile when the crocodile sank its teeth into the elephants trunk …… I replied I don’t know, what did the elephant say when the crocodile sank its teeth into the elephants trunk !… the little girl sighed before nipping her nose between her thumb and forefinger and replying,,,

Duhhhh…….. I vuppose u vink vats vunny…..

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By *woBiTwoCouple
over a year ago

north manchester

"Of course I'll tidy my room and do my chores if you just give me my pocket money a day early dad!!!"

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By *irtydanMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

knock knock

whos there

jester

jester who ?

jester a minute and i will find out

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By *irtydanMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

[Removed by poster at 12/11/10 16:24:36]

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By *s2_ukCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

[Removed by poster at 12/11/10 16:46:28]

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By *s2_ukCouple
over a year ago

Northampton


"Next doors little girl asked me…… What did the elephant say to the crocodile when the crocodile sank its teeth into the elephants trunk …… I replied I don’t know, what did the elephant say when the crocodile sank its teeth into the elephants trunk !… the little girl sighed before nipping her nose between her thumb and forefinger and replying,,,

Duhhhh…….. I vuppose u vink vats vunny…..

"

Made me laugh the most so far

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By *acreadCouple
over a year ago

central scotland

Andy Cameron used to do a Sunday morning radio show and folk were phoning in with jokes (must have been the days before delays)

A little lad phoned in and..

Wee boy: What vegetable makes your eyes water?

Andy C: An onion.

Wee boy: No its a turnip.

Andy C:How can a turnip make your eyes water?

Wee boy:You ever been whacked in the balls with a turnip?

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