FabSwingers.com forum: Profanysaurus

By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

For when a suitable, yet still contemporary profanity escapes you:

a couple to start you off:

Disco fanny: The full strength flavour achieved after 6 hours on a dance floor in PVC trousers.

Cider visor: The Somerset equivalent of Beer Goggles.

Wank Mop: A lone sock employed to prevent varnishing your bed sheets. Often found lurking under beds.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

you forgot the beef box and the crunchie x

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Clitrature: One handed reading material.

Greyhound: Very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

Horse's handbrake: A raging bone on.

Eating sushi off a barber shop floor: Cunnulingus.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Tit Pants: a bra

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Badger fanny :: pubic hair with grey in it

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Badger fanny :: pubic hair with grey in it

hahahahaha love it!!!!

blue waffle - dont know if it goes with the topic but i like making people look at the pics online hehehe

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Quim Chin, Muff mouth: A bearded fellow.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For when a suitable, yet still contemporary profanity escapes you:

Disco fanny: The full strength flavour achieved after 6 hours on a dance floor in PVC trousers.

and a new meaning to "glitter balls"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Badger fanny :: pubic hair with grey in it

hahahahaha love it!!!!

blue waffle - dont know if it goes with the topic but i like making people look at the pics online hehehe"

under no circumstances google blue waffle. you have been warned

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Two Bagger: Someone so ugly that two bags are required, one to cover their head and one to cover yours in case theirs falls off.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Conkers deep: To be in a state of deep penetration .

Crunchie: A sock worn the morning after being used as a wank-mop.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Badger fanny :: pubic hair with grey in it

hahahahaha love it!!!!

blue waffle - dont know if it goes with the topic but i like making people look at the pics online hehehe

under no circumstances google blue waffle. you have been warned

don listen to them

do it do it do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oi, Spunk Breath !!,,,,Simple term used to describe someone who publicly agrees with every thing a male boss or counterpart says.

You horrible snot gobbling fuck pig !….. For general non specific application as and when the user feel someone deserves to be called this..

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Conkers deep: To be in a state of deep penetration .

Crunchie: A sock worn the morning after being used as a wank-mop."

wash your own crunchie next time - you nearly broke the washing machine - and I'm not even going to mention the curtains!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welly fanny::: just makes a squelching noise when in it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Badger fanny :: pubic hair with grey in it

hahahahaha love it!!!!

blue waffle - dont know if it goes with the topic but i like making people look at the pics online hehehe

under no circumstances google blue waffle. you have been warned

don listen to them

do it do it do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

feel free to google 'lemonparty' tho

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not strictly part of the profanysaurus but if homicide is the murder of humans is countryside the murder of politicians?

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"Conkers deep: To be in a state of deep penetration .

Crunchie: A sock worn the morning after being used as a wank-mop.

wash your own crunchie next time - you nearly broke the washing machine - and I'm not even going to mention the curtains!!!!!!"

B.V.H: Abbr, "Blue veined hooligan" A six inch tall, one eyed skinhead.

Budgies tongue: Descriptive, the female erective bit!!

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By *andsomgeorgeMan
over a year ago

Rugby

An Aussie friend enlightened me to the phrase and meaning of the word Gunt. It's the name Aussies give to the area between the gut and c***. Usually found on women wearing low rise jeans with a bit of a muffin top.

Real charmers those Aussies. Great phrase though, made me chuckle.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Brown Daisy: Unpleasantly scented flower which attracts flies rather than bees.

Rusty Sheriff's Badge: see above.

Chocolate Starfish: see above, above.

Granny's Old Tea-towel Holder: see above, above, above.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Corduroy button hole,,,

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

the wee man at the head of the boat!!!!!!!!! x llf Inv

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"Corduroy button hole,,,

Audition the finger puppets: A single-act, one man show not suitable for children.

Autograph the gusset. To allow the turtles head to sign the inside of your underpants.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"the wee man at the head of the boat!!!!!!!!! x llf Inv

ooooo, I'd forgotten him!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the wee man at the head of the boat!!!!!!!!! x llf Inv

Who is usually the cox!

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"the wee man at the head of the boat!!!!!!!!! x llf Inv

Who is usually the cox!"

oh you couldn't be more wrong!!!!

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Genie Rub: to buff up a skin lantern until you are granted three sticky wishes.

Haddock Pastie: beef curtains

Beef Sideburns: only worn during deep drilling inn the ravine.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"the wee man at the head of the boat!!!!!!!!! x llf Inv

Who is usually the cox!

oh you couldn't be more wrong!!!!

aka Budgie's Tongue.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Starfish Trooper: An Arsestronaut'..

Release the chocolate hostage: To liberate Richard the third.

Wet as an otters pocket: Descriptive as to the moistness of a ladies kipper mitten.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

L.R.F (low resolution fox) - A female who appears to be attractive from a long distance, but is in fact unbelievably ugly close up.

Scud: A rocket that upon inspection turns out to be largely unsuitable for injecting with fuel.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"L.R.F (low resolution fox) - A female who appears to be attractive from a long distance, but is in fact unbelievably ugly close up."

FFS, thought we agreed not to make this personal.........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really wish i didnt have such a curious nature, i had to google both lemonparty and blue waffle, ewwwwwww i dont feel very well now

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

[Removed by poster at 12/11/10 12:41:39]

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Ant and Deck: a favourite pornographic shoot position where the lady lifts her legs and displays a partially bald twat and a little arsehole.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Conkers deep: To be in a state of deep penetration .

Crunchie: A sock worn the morning after being used as a wank-mop."

sorry think u will find that is "conkentration"?

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"L.R.F (low resolution fox) - A female who appears to be attractive from a long distance, but is in fact unbelievably ugly close up.

FFS, thought we agreed not to make this personal.........

I can't see you that clearly that far bleedin' north now can I!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"L.R.F (low resolution fox) - A female who appears to be attractive from a long distance, but is in fact unbelievably ugly close up.

Scud: A rocket that upon inspection turns out to be largely unsuitable for injecting with fuel."

laughing so much ive produced an air bisquit

(fart)

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"I really wish i didnt have such a curious nature, i had to google both lemonparty and blue waffle, ewwwwwww i dont feel very well now

yuk! put me off my Hula Hoops!!

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"L.R.F (low resolution fox) - A female who appears to be attractive from a long distance, but is in fact unbelievably ugly close up.

FFS, thought we agreed not to make this personal.........

I can't see you that clearly that far bleedin' north now can I!!

that's cos I rendered you blind the first time!!!! MWAH xxxxxx

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"I really wish i didnt have such a curious nature, i had to google both lemonparty and blue waffle, ewwwwwww i dont feel very well now

yuk! put me off my Hula Hoops!!

just the one bag or a multi pack????

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"I really wish i didnt have such a curious nature, i had to google both lemonparty and blue waffle, ewwwwwww i dont feel very well now

yuk! put me off my Hula Hoops!!

just the one bag or a multi pack????"

The shock didn't last too long, I just looked at your Wee Bald Sailor rowing through the Clam Fields and I'm fine now!

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"I really wish i didnt have such a curious nature, i had to google both lemonparty and blue waffle, ewwwwwww i dont feel very well now

yuk! put me off my Hula Hoops!!

just the one bag or a multi pack????

The shock didn't last too long, I just looked at your Wee Bald Sailor rowing through the Clam Fields and I'm fine now!

Luv you too ya Pumpers Lump

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wish I hadn't opened this thread!

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Whitney dressed as Britney: mutton dressed as lamb.

Feltch: to orally reclaim a recently injected love custard from the hairy clam or chocolate starfish.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Ming the merciless: Death by chocolate starfish.

One for Funky:

Monkey bath: A bath so hot when lowering yourself in you go 'Oo! Oo! Oo! Aa! Aa! Aa!'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

for the more generous lady:

Hung Like a wizards sleave

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Ming the merciless: Death by chocolate starfish"

oh, I just love it when you talk romantic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i hate to sound like a facebook fan but sometimes i really wish thier was a like button on here, i'm writing these down and aim to use them all in the pub later lol

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"for the more generous lady:

Hung Like a wizards sleave

or......... Opera house: A large vagina, with heavy pink safety curtains.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"for the more generous lady:

Hung Like a wizards sleave

or......... Opera house: A large vagina, with heavy pink safety curtains.

im just wondering if the guy who designed sydney had that in mind, what with it being down under and all that, i'll never be able to look at that building the same way again lol

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Double bassing: To have sex from behind while fiddling with the ladies left nipple with one hand and her budgies tongue with the other, a position similar to the one adopted for playing the double bass, though the sound is slightly different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Double bassing: To have sex from behind while fiddling with the ladies left nipple with one hand and her budgies tongue with the other, a position similar to the one adopted for playing the double bass, though the sound is slightly different."

Look up calfornia steam roller, i friend told me about it once.....or should i say ex friend lol

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Look up calfornia steam roller, i friend told me about it once.....or should i say ex friend lol"

ewwwwww.... not the steam poop!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"for the more generous lady:

Hung Like a wizards sleave

or......... Opera house: A large vagina, with heavy pink safety curtains.

Sometimes refered to as "a bucket of welks"....... Thats it I`m off noo.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Look up calfornia steam roller, i friend told me about it once.....or should i say ex friend lol"

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ewwwwww.... not the steam poop!!!

the one and only, the poor lad didnt get out much, was funny as hell we all had to put subjects in a tub, pick one at random and give a speach on it to the room, (Uni thing) i wrote that and he picked it, i was so busy laughing i still dont know what he said to the room lololol

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Bobble Head: someone who enjoys a regular gobble on a pork sword.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

this thread is now giving me the boak..... you've brought it to a whole new level Nice, llf

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

68: a blowjob given on the strict understanding that 'I owe you one'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"68: a blowjob given on the strict understanding that 'I owe you one'"

Thats my fave position !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ant and Deck: a favourite pornographic shoot position where the lady lifts her legs and displays a partially bald twat and a little arsehole. "

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Feather weight – someone you must be desperate to fuck. linked to the term ‘punching above your weight’

Bottle opener – similar to above, but acknowledging your belief you would have to be d*unk to go there.

Probe - a person who is up their own arse, without the need for alien intervention.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Malteser moment – the realisation your penis isn’t the only thing being pulled out after anal.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

James – rhyming slang meaning not a very nice person – see James Blunt.

Fury Jim – bastardised version of above meaning a hairy vagina.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

"Malteser moment – the realisation your penis isn’t the only thing being pulled out after anal.

eeeewwww!!

apple catchers - Generously proportioned knickers.

air buffet - A lingering gaseous meal, more substantial than an air biscuit, to which one may make several visits.

Apache - Sex without a condom. Riding bare back.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

bally heck exclmn. arch. Wartime form of 'bloody hell' when swearing was rationed. Strong expletives were reserved for soldiers on the front line.

bang v. To have sex; to shag. e.g. 'We were banging, like a shite house (qv) door in the wind". n. A sexual encounter; a shag.

banjo n. On the penis, that thin ridge of skin connecting the polo neck to the bobby's helmet (qv).

bannocks interj. Scotch equivalent of bollocks. n. Jockspeak for knackers; plums (qv).

Is that last one right Fmuma??

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

Quick! The serious posts have started again, keep it going!!

barge-arse n. A woman of rotund posterior aspect.

bark at the ants v. to yoff (qv). See stripey laugh.

barker's egg n. Poodle shit. A dog turd so old it has gone white.

barking spider n. Ringpiece; anus; chocolate starfish (qv).

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

gazungas n. Large breasts.

geetle n. A bumbob. The little pointed bit that hangs outside your rusty sheriff's badge after you've had a Gladys (qv),

geezerbird n. Gadgy woman; half-a-gadge. A butch looking woman.

gender bender n. Effeminate, flowery male of varying or obscure sexual orientation e.g. Marc Almond out of Soft Cell.

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By *nvictus OP Man
over a year ago

Beeston

X-ray specs n. Spectacles usually available by mail order only from crappy magazines which enable the wearer to see through a woman's clothing.

XXX A special video certificate awarded to pornographic films of exceptionally poor sound and picture quality.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Polo and Inv - pair of sick gits!!! you've put me right off ma spit roast dinner

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