FabSwingers.com forum: National joke day apparantly

By *unlovers OP Couple
over a year ago

rotherham

Would love to hear some good jokes today as its my day off and could do with a good laugh

Prize for the best joke

Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Velcro.......

What a rip off !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a recurring dream once

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hanna-Barbera took the decision to export the popular 1960's cartoon 'The Flintstones' to the middle east.

Reactions were mixed.

Viewers in Bahrain don't like it, but those in Abu Dhabi do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Newcastle uninted make Steve Mc Claren their new manager

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why was 6 afraid of 7?

because 7 8 9 (seven ate nine)

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By *unlovers OP Couple
over a year ago

rotherham

Err. Right good start

Any good ones now

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

0 & 8 walking down the street. 0 says to 8 whys your belt so tight?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Two snowmen chatting.

One says "can you smell carrots"?

Taxi.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Two monkeys are in the bath

One says 'Oooh ooh aahh ahh eee eee'

And the other says 'Well put some cold in then'

Bill and Ben are in Bed.

Bill says 'Flob alob alob'

and Ben says 'If you love me you'd swallow'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Two snowmen chatting.

One says "can you smell carrots"?

Taxi......."

Did the taxi arrive on time?....lol

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By *ig Ted 66Man
over a year ago

Hinckley

So....

I heard this farmer shouting;-

"Lambs for sale.... were £10, now only £5"

I thought to myself;

Blimey! that's sheep at half the price?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Two snowmen chatting.

One says "can you smell carrots"?

Taxi.......

Did the taxi arrive on time?....lol"

Taxi arriving on time? That's a joke all on its own......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's brown and sticky? Lol.. I'm such a child

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By *ig Ted 66Man
over a year ago

Hinckley

"What's brown and sticky? Lol.. I'm such a child

A brown stick....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My wee sis had to be taken away by social services once....just cos I was rocking her to sleep!

To be fair the rocks were fucking huge.....

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

I can't stand those Russian Nesting Dolls. They are so full of themselves!

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

I bought a new car which runs on ferrets. Made the classic mistake today and filled it up with weasel.

c/o Tim Vine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you call a man with a pig on his head..... Hammed

What do you call a man with a pig and a cow on his head..... Muhammed

What do you call a man with a pigand a cow on his head and a vibrator up his ass..... Sheik Muhammed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guy goes to a fancy dress party in his boxers, a girls asks him what he's supposed to be, he replies with premature ejaculation, she looks puzzled, to which he adds... I've just come in me pants!!

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Toon Army !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What is yellow and lives off dead beatles?

Yoko Ono xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What do you call a man with a pig on his head..... Hammed

What do you call a man with a pig and a cow on his head..... Muhammed

What do you call a man with a pigand a cow on his head and a vibrator up his ass..... Sheik Muhammed

A man fucking a pig...Ramaham

A man fucking a sheep...Ramalamb

Or the guy stuck in a jar.....Ramdin

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

If you have trouble sleeping, just lay as far as you can to the edge of the bed. Sooner of later you will drop off.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper ...... sold his soul to Santa.

Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb? Let’s go play on our bikes.

i'll get me coat!!!

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

My fear of moving stairs is escalating!

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By *rank EinsteinMan
over a year ago

Burton upon stather

Englishman, irishman and a scot are accused of burglary and are found guilty.

In the courthouse the judge says due to new sentencing laws you are allowed one vice for your time inside.

Englishman says I want a lifetime supply of hookers, the scot says I want a lifetime supply of whisky, the irishman says I want a lifetime supply of cigarettes.

They all get locked away and their vices provided.

Years later new evidence comes to court so the judge goes to visitors each man.

The Englishmans shagged himself to death.

The scots drank himself to death.

The irishmans sat in his cell surrounded by cartons of cigarettes, looks up and says

Got a light?

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By *rank EinsteinMan
over a year ago

Burton upon stather

What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I bought a new car which runs on ferrets. Made the classic mistake today and filled it up with weasel.

c/o Tim Vine"

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By *ig Ted 66Man
over a year ago

Hinckley

Two big blue-bottle flies in an airing cupboard... which one is the soldier?

... the one sat on the tank...

'Berdum Tisshhh'

I thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women asks the doctor how many calories are in sperm? Doctor replies believe me love if you swallow no one cares how fat you are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What is yellow and lives off dead beatles?

Yoko Ono xx

Lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What do you call a man with a pig on his head..... Hammed

What do you call a man with a pig and a cow on his head..... Muhammed

What do you call a man with a pigand a cow on his head and a vibrator up his ass..... Sheik Muhammed

A man fucking a pig...Ramaham

A man fucking a sheep...Ramalamb

Or the guy stuck in a jar.....Ramdin

A man fucking a sheep and his wife walks in : Ramalambadingdong

Ah, memories of Gene Wilder in Woody Allen's film.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The government

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