FabSwingers.com forum: Useless but true facts

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Whenever you hoover up a spider, six of it's friends sneak out and steal one of your socks....fact!

What worthless (un)true trivia do you know?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The first Zulu to be killed ever was Will.....as they said...."fire at will!"

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Useless but true- your foot will fit exactly into the space between your wrist and elbow

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time you empty the kitchen bowl, thers's always a teaspoon left in it..

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the moon were just 5,000 miles closer to the Earth in it's avergae orbit the increase in gravitational on the oceans would mean that there would be a three inch gap between the sea bed and the water.

Oh sorrow, that's supposed to be in the arrant nonsense thread!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the early 1940s, Heinz produced a version of Alphabetti Spaghetti especially for the German market that consisted only of little pasta swastikas.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no real name for the back pf the knee!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you make a cow laugh hard enough, milk will come out of its nose.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *lutandhubbyCouple
over a year ago

west midlands

why do chickens have wings when they cant fly ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If you make a cow laugh hard enough, milk will come out of its nose. "

laugh so much!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

statistically, in america, you have more chance of being killed working in a mcdonalds then you do being a police officer.....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

statistically, in america, you have more chance of being killed working in a mcdonalds then you do being a police officer.....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shishkebabs were invented when a Turkish mathematician tried to make an abacus out of meat.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

Barbie's measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *issbehaveCouple
over a year ago

wrexham

"why do chickens have wings when they cant fly ?

they can, just not very far or high, mine used to roost over night in the trees, I guess thats cos foxes cant climb trees! lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *issbehaveCouple
over a year ago

wrexham

its still legal to kill a welshman caught within Chester city walls after midnight, but only with a bow and arrow!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

During "Happy Days" mania, nearly half of all newborns in the United States were named "Fonzie".

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *issbehaveCouple
over a year ago

wrexham

"If you make a cow laugh hard enough, milk will come out of its nose. "

LMAO!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

how does spiderman get out of the bath??

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its illegal to keep an Elephant in your garden

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"why do chickens have wings when they cant fly ?

oi!!! speaking of chickens....

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

during the 1913 derby at epsom a horse trampled a woman in the name of freedom and equality.

97 years later and horses still can't vote.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

once someone mentions it to you - you can never spend the rest of your life without thinking of a pencil sharpener, every time you see a cats arse.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times"

do we know this from experience??

another horse related one - horse cant vomit

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

whoopi goldberg has no eyebrows and now you know this fact you will not be able to watch one film with her in without constantly looking for them

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

next time you get into that hotel bed remember Humans shed about 1.5 pounds of skin each year. The average person will lose around 105 pounds of skin by age 70.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

whoopi goldberg was married to peter cushing but refused to use her married name for fear of general amusement

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The human body is completely turned over every seven years, so if you'v not met someone for over seven years, you've never, technically, met them

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

do we know this from experience??

another horse related one - horse cant vomit"

Yes they can!!!! Well the last one to catch a glimpse of my cock was.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Billy the Kid was really a baby goat

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

Over 2500 left handed people a year are killed from using products made for right handed people!

.... bet it is those darn scissors!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

"Billy the Kid was really a baby goat

lmfao

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *lackboaWoman
over a year ago

greenock

elephants cant jump........which is a good thing really !

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lyn Cooper will show you her 'money box' if you showed her your 'sausage and baked beans' first.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Supposedly, elephants can't walk backwards and if they try they die

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich

If you get a hole in your sock such that you can see a big toe - put it onto the other foot - the other big toe will then poke through.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no such thing as a white horse.

The double white gene in horses is fatal.

There is however, a grey gene, hence all horses are grey, rather than white.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Test tube babies don't have belly buttons..they do however have barcodes

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Test tube babies don't have belly buttons..they do however have barcodes"

that'd be a belly bar code then.

We are all equal, just some of us are more equal than others.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no absolute knowledge. And those who claim it, whether they are scientists or dogmatists, open the door to tragedy. All information is imperfect. We have to treat it with humility - Jacob Bronowski, The Ascent of Man

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you forget something memorable how memorable was it if you forgot it?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's an Irish naval base at Ballybutton

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/11/10 22:43:04]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most spiders in this country have enough venom to kill a human being.

They don't have strong enough fangs to pierce human skin though, phew!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times"

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

you always find something in the last place you looked

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

ring tailed lemurs chew on (but dont kill) giant millepedes because they spray a substance similar to ecstasy in defense and the Lemurs like getting high

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

pet shops don't sell wasps, but they've always got them in the window

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971"

Yes its the equivalent to five old pence, so whatever that equates to today, I was born after decimalisation so not too hot on old money, sorry, perhaps you can help!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

The Sun burns 4 million tonnes of its own mass per second!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971

Yes its the equivalent to five old pence, so whatever that equates to today, I was born after decimalisation so not too hot on old money, sorry, perhaps you can help!

Oooooo.... saucer of cream for miss kitty lol!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971

Yes its the equivalent to five old pence, so whatever that equates to today, I was born after decimalisation so not too hot on old money, sorry, perhaps you can help!

Oooooo.... saucer of cream for miss kitty lol!"

Miow! I love cream!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971

Yes its the equivalent to five old pence, so whatever that equates to today, I was born after decimalisation so not too hot on old money, sorry, perhaps you can help!

ahhh you mean 5d then - some benefits to being old lol (will never forget the date as it's my mum's birthday)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there's a bear on foxes glacier mints

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Androphobia is a fear of men.

Caligynephobia is a fear of beautiful women.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Scopophobia is a fear of being looked at.

Clinophobia is the fear of beds.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"there's a bear on foxes glacier mints"

I just read that as 'there's beer in foxes glacier mints'....

...should have gone to Specsavers (please note that other brands of Optician are also available).

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"The Sun burns 4 million tonnes of its own mass per second!!!"

Wouldn't it be easier not to print it?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

The numbers on a roulette wheel add up to 666

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971

Yes its the equivalent to five old pence, so whatever that equates to today, I was born after decimalisation so not too hot on old money, sorry, perhaps you can help!

ahhh you mean 5d then - some benefits to being old lol (will never forget the date as it's my mum's birthday)"

12 pennies or 12d was a shilling, 20 shillings to £1 so being fined 5p is the equivalent to being a shilling in pre-decimal currency. 5d would be about 2p as close as near enough!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

"If you get caught d*unk in charge of a horse and carriage, the fine is 5p, as it hasn't been updated since Victorian times

one assumes it was a shilling in Victorian times as we have only had decimal currency since 1971

Yes its the equivalent to five old pence, so whatever that equates to today, I was born after decimalisation so not too hot on old money, sorry, perhaps you can help!

ahhh you mean 5d then - some benefits to being old lol (will never forget the date as it's my mum's birthday)"

12 pennies or 12d was a shilling, 20 shillings to £1 so being fined 5p is the equivalent to being a shilling in pre-decimal currency. 5d would be about 2p as close as near enough!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *empnbunkCouple
over a year ago

south coast

A giraffe can clean its own ears with its 21-inch tongue!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Some insect species males have special penises that can scoop out any sperm already in the female and replace it with their own...sort of like ethnic sperm cleansing I suppose.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icelymarkedMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Bumble bees can't fly .... they are airodynamically impossible!

Please don't tell the bumble bees

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Dogs can't look up

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Apparently the only land based animals that could survive a nuclear holocaust are cockroaches and Dale Winton, FACT!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dogs can't look up"

no but they can lick their balls, fair swop i think

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most vampires are described in folklore as flushed and ruddy, with swollen bodies and bloated faces. Often, they can be identified because they're sitting up in the grave.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

If you put all of the premiere league pitches back to back on their heads in a row they would probably reach to somewhere quite far away... like the Moon or the Sun.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most spiders in this country have enough venom to kill a human being.

They don't have strong enough fangs to pierce human skin though, phew!"

same with crane flys (daddy longlegs)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Turtles evolved from pebbles.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turtles evolved from pebbles."

thanks for that i didnt know turtles were related to fredy flinstone

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Did you know we all have to call Turnips, Swedes now thanks to bureaucrats in Brussels!

Also, vice-versa the Swedish must be called Turnips.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Horses have an instinctive fear of pigs.

This is because they were a natural predator, as horses have evolved from a fox-sized, four-toed forrest dwelling creature called Eohippus, and pigs would have been bigger!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did you know we all have to call Turnips, Swedes now thanks to bureaucrats in Brussels!

Also, vice-versa the Swedish must be called Turnips."

Funky has slipped off his pirrelli and banged his Swede, methinks!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oDownEasyMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Strawberry milkshakes are the colour they are because they are produced from vampire cows.

The flavouring actually comes from using crushed blackcurrants with a split personality.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Apparently 'Déjà vu' translated to French is 'une expérience répétée'.

Not nearly as attractive sounding as the English version is it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tennis pro Evonne Goolagong's last name means "kangaroo's nose" in Australia's aboriginal language

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

To most humans Prawn society is baffling.

For instance there are as many King prawns as normal prawns.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you pull a spiders legs off, he can't walk

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *eizvollWoman
over a year ago

in my own little world :-)

"To most humans Prawn society is baffling.

For instance there are as many King prawns as normal prawns."

Please can I come and visit your planet???

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"To most humans Prawn society is baffling.

For instance there are as many King prawns as normal prawns.

Please can I come and visit your planet???

All are welcome to Funky Town, of which I am the mayor.

Especially those with pretty bottys, such as yourself

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *eizvollWoman
over a year ago

in my own little world :-)

"All are welcome to Funky Town, of which I am the mayor.

Especially those with pretty bottys, such as yourself

A compliment as well

Better book my flights!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Scallops have SIXTY eyes

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Only 30% of humans can flare their nostrils.

I am one of those elite.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ixson-BallsMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

Peter Karpin, a German espionage agent in World War I, was seized by French Intelligence agents in 1914 as soon as he entered the country. Keeping his capture a secret, the French sent faked reports from Karpin to Germany and intercepted the agent's wages and expense money until Karpin escaped in 1917. With those funds the French purchased an automobile, which, in 1919, in occupied Rurh, accidentally ran down and killed a man, who proved to be Peter Karpin

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the term rule of thumb comes from the victorian age where husbands were allowed to beat their wifes but not with anything wider than a thumb

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I read once that women are from Venus and men are from Mars.

This, despite neither planet being capable of sustaining any life. Crazy!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

90% of people who post useless but true facts use Google to find them...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Scallops have SIXTY eyes"

I actually didn't need to know that..I eat too many to need to know that!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Hummingbirds are the only animal that can fly backwards...

hey, hold on. Dragonflies can too!!! You mean you can't trust everything that's on the internet!!!! I can feel a stern letter coming on for those chaps at Google...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dogs can't look up"

Pigs not Dogs

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"Pigs not Dogs"

Agreed!

Also cats not dogs either.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Pigs not Dogs

Agreed!

Also cats not dogs either.

...but they can both fly backwards!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Turkeys can reproduce without having sex in a process called parthenogenesis. Not surprising really; have you seen a turkey? Doubt they get much action.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By 2025, zoologists believe that the kangaroo will have developed an additional pouch for his iPod.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

The longest word in the English language, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, is 'pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis'.

It doesn't mean anything - it was invented in 1935, purely so it could be the longest word in the English language.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

If you sneeze with your eyes open your eyeballs will fall out

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

"Did you know we all have to call Turnips, Swedes now thanks to bureaucrats in Brussels!

Also, vice-versa the Swedish must be called Turnips."

in truth a swede is larger and orangey brown, what you made lanterns from on bonttie night

a turnip is smaller and white

hope this helps

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Polar bears can eat as many as 22 penguins in a single sitting.

Sometimes with the wrappers on

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Turkeys can reproduce without having sex in a process called parthenogenesis. Not surprising really; have you seen a turkey? Doubt they get much action.

Sudden paranoia attack!! I think I'm pregnant!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'ithyphallaphobia' is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/11/10 14:08:55]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"'ithyphallaphobia' is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis!!"

...otherwise known as a wife.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"'ithyphallaphobia' is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis!!"

At a recent swingers night, I entered the 'Best erection of the night competition.'

I made it to the semi's.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"'ithyphallaphobia' is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis!!

...otherwise known as a wife.

But did also you know that 14 percent of all facts are fictitious and 27 percent of people know that

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I invented Bees.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I invented Bees."

Who violently steals honey?

Robert Mugabee

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I invented Bees."

I invented the bee inventor

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ex Prime Minister Gordon Brown is an accomplished studio musician, and has played trumpet and woodwind for the likes of Tony Bennett, Frank Sinatra and (most recently) Paul Anka.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Granite strewn socks are a proven cure for the black death

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"I invented Bees."

Due to their diminishing numbers in recent years I guess you had a lot of product recalls?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Sea horses evolved into land horses to avoid their sugar lumps dissolving before getting to eat them.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every member of the Australian band Men at Work is currently unemployed.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

One for Funky::: Monkeys never catch the cold

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The loss of the South American rainforest has decreased the friction of the surface of the Earth, causing it to spin faster and thereby cool the air, reducing global warming.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"I invented Bees.

Due to their diminishing numbers in recent years I guess you had a lot of product recalls?

No I'm phasing them out slowly to be replaced by my new design of insect.

The Spider monkey!

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/S1pGbK_WY26ih-wC9NvDTWJohjxng2WFggs-BlT7iVA?feat=directlink

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *lderguy4funMan
over a year ago

ROTHERHAM

ive been told a woman can take 12inch but she cant take a foot. maybe im wrong

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

foxhunters have found a loophole in the law and now dress foxes up as small children and chase them around the country

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *azarus70Man
over a year ago

Cheshire

The heart of a blue whale is the size of a vw beetle , and irs arteries are wide enough for a human to swim down.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"I invented Bees.

Due to their diminishing numbers in recent years I guess you had a lot of product recalls?

No I'm phasing them out slowly to be replaced by my new design of insect.

The Spider monkey!

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/S1pGbK_WY26ih-wC9NvDTWJohjxng2WFggs-BlT7iVA?feat=directlink"

The tip of a spider monkey's tail can support the weight of its entire body. Also they are the species of monkey that are used in films more than any other.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Singer Cat Stevens is allergic to cats.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *azarus70Man
over a year ago

Cheshire

The drummer in the band Zz Top is called Brian Beard , but he's the only member without one!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

On average, a child uses 730 crayons by their 10th birthday.

Funky's still using them

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"I invented Bees.

Due to their diminishing numbers in recent years I guess you had a lot of product recalls?

No I'm phasing them out slowly to be replaced by my new design of insect.

The Spider monkey!

http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/S1pGbK_WY26ih-wC9NvDTWJohjxng2WFggs-BlT7iVA?feat=directlink"

eeeewwww! Modelled on an old work colleague of mine!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

welsh is exactly the same language as english...only spelt backwards

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because of an onion allergy, the singer Meatloaf can't eat meatloaf.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"welsh is exactly the same language as english...only spelt backwards"

!skcollob

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

on the 4th november, it is customary to poke a small child in the eye and shout "onions"

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the last supper, Jesus was automatically charged an 18% gratuity

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Apart from Humans, Dogs are the only animals with a prostate gland.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

britain is open between the hours of 9-5 monday to friday only

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

If you stand 8 double decker buses on top of one another then fold an A4 piece of paper in half then imagine a grizzly bear wearing a bandana holding a machine gun....... erm sorry I'm not sure where I'm going with this.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"If you stand 8 double decker buses on top of one another then fold an A4 piece of paper in half then imagine a grizzly bear wearing a bandana holding a machine gun....... erm sorry I'm not sure where I'm going with this."

...oddly I was.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

there are over 50 mediums in the uk.

however, no record is kept of how many rare or well done there are

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Osama bin Laden has seen Woody Allen's "Annie Hall" 15 times.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

sex was invented in 1962 by terry wogan to counteract a sharp decline in the population.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thought that was 1972 lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the height of "Star Wars" mania, the Queen gave her xmas day broadcast in a Chewbacca costume.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Apparently in our lifetime we eat on average 6 spiders in our sleep.

I've eaten 14 and I was awake, shhhh don't tell anyone hehehehehe

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *empnbunkCouple
over a year ago

south coast

it is illegal for taxis to carry rabid dogs or corpses in their car and by law they have to ask passengers if they have small pox or the plague

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Going to the local shops in a small town on a wednesday afternoon is a futile excercise

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oDownEasyMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire

A typical ant is 3 feet long, but they are veeerrryyy far away

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A typical ant is 3 feet long, but they are veeerrryyy far away"

its only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day that you realise how often they just burst into flames

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *TUDLY_GOOD_FUCKMan
over a year ago

mansfield

If everything is made of Attoms,

Then what are shadows made of ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *TUDLY_GOOD_FUCKMan
over a year ago

mansfield

If you drop a slice of bread, it always lands butter side down.

And if you drop a cat it always lands on it's feet,

So.......

What would happen if you buttered a cats back

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is that true?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

The average attention span of a typical male is

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"The average attention span of a typical male is"

You didn't day how lon..... Ooooh! A cloud shaped like bagpuss!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the other day i..oh,no...that wasn't me!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

If all the people in China were to jump off a chair at the same time, it would be very odd.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

The average attention span of a male is approximately 3.8 seconds, and even then they are only looking (usually vacantly) and not listening

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"The average attention span of a male is approximately 3.8 seconds, and even then they are only looking (usually vacantly) and not listening

Can someone please tell me what the second half of that sentence said, only I lost interest half-way through...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was little, my grandfather used to make me stand in a closet for 5 minutes without moving. He said it was elevator practice.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

when I was younger I used to lie on my bed staring at the ceiling, it was practice for married life

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Nostradamus predicted that if any forum thread ever hit 160 posts then the world would end.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nostradamus predicted that if any forum thread ever hit 160 posts then the world would end. "

Let's see

I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Funky Fact No.36

Winter is upon us but my favourite season of all has to be salt.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

"Nostradamus predicted that if any forum thread ever hit 160 posts then the world would end.

Let's see

I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car. "

My mistake, it was 1600!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I get bored, I like to drive to Bluewater and get a parking spot,I then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rasberry birth marks are caused by mum letting ou a little botty burp when giving birth & the gas reacting with the un-developed Stratum Coneum (pigment) part of the skin!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

In Cleveland, Ohio it is illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dust is just mud with all the juice squeezed out

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Before humans were invented giant blood thirsty lizards, some the size of houses roamed the earth for thousands of years!

I shit you not!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The actual Godzilla was only really 5 feet 6 inches. Japanese soldiers killed him in minutes

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

there are no words in the english language that rhyme with month, silver and purple

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"there are no words in the english language that rhyme with month, silver and purple"

there is

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"there are no words in the english language that rhyme with month, silver and purple

there is

blimey and theres me thinking all the posts in this thread are true

lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/11/10 16:22:54]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

The Indesits have over 400 words for snow, this despite them being largely white goods.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

the scientists that was heading the research to try to discover whether the fruit orange was named after the colour or the colour was named after the fruit was beaten to a pulp before his findings could be made public.

All appeals to find the murderer have been fruitless and his family are in bits

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The videogame Donkey Kong is based on a true story.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oDownEasyMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire

There are actually only 17 MPs in parliament-they share rubber masks to make it look like there are lots more.

The one who draws the short straw gets to be Anne Widdecombe.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

In the early 1970's the NASA conducted an experiment to see how long astronauts could live on water, vitamens and their own faeces. The experiment was conducted at SMU Campus in Austin, Texas with 14 first year law students. After 7 weeks the project was suspended. Conclusion: Indefinitely

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

some cats are not actually smaller than horses there just further away

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

if you eat grapes without removing the seeds you grow mini grape vines in your tummy that produce one litre of wine per annum

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you swallow chewing gum the streets wouldn't look sooo pretty

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

there was a 5th Beatle,. but he flipped over onto his back and couldn't get up again

you can still see him, legs kicking in the air if go down abbey road

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you ever get to meet your doppleganger, you will die!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a polar bear's liver is toxic to humans.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oDownEasyMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire

"a polar bear's liver is toxic to humans."

The reverse is also true, so Polar Bears will leave the liver when the disembowel any human they come across.

Alternatively, carry some human liver with you to wave in front of a Polar Bear & thus scare it off

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a kangaroo can't fart

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you make a cow laugh hard enough, milk will come out of its nose. "

Cows are the only mammals that pee backwards

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you make a cow laugh hard enough, milk will come out of its nose.

Cows are the only mammals that pee backwards"

A black cow is a chocolate soda with chocolate ice cream. The term dates from the Roaring Twenties, although it also came to be used to describe a root beer float. Another term for a black cow was a mud fizz.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

10% of humans are caused by accidents

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *adgeeMan
over a year ago

Dumbarton

George Foreman's 5 sons are called: George Edward Foreman Jr, George Edward Foreman III, George Edward Foreman IV, George Edward Foreman V, George Edward Foreman VI

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Stick insects are actually bits of tree that have come alive!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Fish sticks are made by snapping off the small branches of fish trees.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately