FabSwingers.com forum: Problems that didn't need solving

By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Top down bottles of ketchup/Mayo/salad cream etc.

Why?

What's wrong with just turning an ordinary bottle upside down?

Any other solutions to non-existent problems you can think of?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it too late to say Iraq, Libya and Syria?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre....."

Elbows

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

moaners about single guys contacting them...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"moaners about single guys contacting them...

Yes stay oot ma box

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre....."

Same reason toilet doors should open outwards, Just think of how many people don't wash their hands then touch the handle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them.

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By *o-jCouple
over a year ago

Outskirts of Notts

Contactless credit cards .

How hard to type in four numbers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"moaners about single guys contacting them...

Yes stay oot ma box

theres room for a few of us in there....

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

The Green Button

(Sorry couldn't resist

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them."

lol, I wonder what "Slimming World's" secret to success is?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them.

lol, I wonder what "Slimming World's" secret to success is? "

Crack is the secret ingredient. Allegedly......

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

My tooth was fine this morning

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Trent Barton who run bus services around here, used to have routes numbered 61, 62, 63, 64, 91, 92, 93, 94 etc.

One of their employees with more time on his hands than was necessary, must have found a batch of unused decimal points.

Now these routes are 6.1, 6.2, 6.3, 6.4, 9.1, 9.2, 9.3, 9.4

Give that man a payrise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My tooth was fine this morning

Muffle muffle

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"My tooth was fine this morning

Muffle muffle

Bietch!!!

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By *icky999Man
over a year ago

warrington

"Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them.

lol, I wonder what "Slimming World's" secret to success is? "

hope

if I could bottle that id be a rich man

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"The Green Button

(Sorry couldn't resist

Meant the green dot (which I no longer have)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Computers. "To cut down the amount of paperwork needed".

Really? Really???

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Crime fighting, Dangermouse sorted that one out years ago.

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Microwavable pots of beans.

Because pouring beans into a bowl is hard.

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By *o-jCouple
over a year ago

Outskirts of Notts

with penfolds help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

fun sized stuff..

essentially its the bits that fell on the floor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'best cooked from frozen'.

I buy my dinner sometimes at work..it'll thaw by the time I get home...it tastes no better or worse..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Polo the mint with the hole,

Why put the hole in it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Manly sports.

Ooooh err, nice knowing ye all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Polo the mint with the hole,

Why put the hole in it

worse...they sell the polo mint bits they take out...like its a separate product...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre....."

Not in the toilets in The Oracle in Reading!! You don't touch the taps or soap- just wave your hands under & they work!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre.....

Not in the toilets in The Oracle in Reading!! You don't touch the taps or soap- just wave your hands under & they work!!"

Sorcery

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Immigration

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre.....

Not in the toilets in The Oracle in Reading!! You don't touch the taps or soap- just wave your hands under & they work!!"

What happens if one waves one's willy about?

Do the cell doors open without one touching them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Automated checkouts at supermarkets. They never work!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Top down bottles of ketchup/Mayo/salad cream etc.

Why?

What's wrong with just turning an ordinary bottle upside down?

Any other solutions to non-existent problems you can think of?"

The design of the bottle is different.

The 'bottom top' is wider giving the bottle greater stability than trying to balance one upside down would.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Automated checkouts at supermarkets. They never work!"

Unexpected item under your jumper!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Automated checkouts at supermarkets. They never work!

Unexpected item under your jumper!"

Tina Titz beware.

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By *ibbyhunterCouple
over a year ago

keighley

why change the marathon chocolate bar into a snickers bar just not the same ,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre.....

Not in the toilets in The Oracle in Reading!! You don't touch the taps or soap- just wave your hands under & they work!!

What happens if one waves one's willy about?

Do the cell doors open without one touching them?

Don't get many willy's in the ladies toilets. Unfortunately

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By *o-jCouple
over a year ago

Outskirts of Notts

I've just seen that advert about a phone that charges wirelessly , I mean ffs how hard is it to plug a little lead in . and if you travel you'll have to carry something the size of a beermat around with you .

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By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Treadmills.

Just go for a walk FFS!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

(especially in scotland)the week ahead weather forecast...scorchio!

aye..right.

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

The BBC replacing Clarkson.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The Green Button

(Sorry couldn't resist

)

Meant the green dot (which I no longer have) "

Neither do I

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre....."

And the Door Handle to Get Out !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them.

lol, I wonder what "Slimming World's" secret to success is? "

Dunno but first week in and I lost 4.5lb woop woop

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

"Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them.

lol, I wonder what "Slimming World's" secret to success is? "

The secret is that most people don't get long term sustained weight loss, so keep paying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre....."

Unless it's paired with the sensing taps....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Contactless credit cards .

How hard to type in four numbers

Not hard at all, nor is it hard to read those numbers, film those number or have the machine record those numbers.

Now given that the type if place to skim cards and their details is usually a low value transaction (small shop, petrol station, small food place etc) it makes sense to remove the pin from that situation. The likes of a large store you're spending a large amount of money in being compromised however is much lower.

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By *ike4362ukMan
over a year ago

Cheshunt

"Contactless credit cards .

How hard to type in four numbers

"
And how easy to hack...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The Green Button

(Sorry couldn't resist

)

Meant the green dot (which I no longer have) "

Forgive me. Still clueless as to what you mean.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Computers. "To cut down the amount of paperwork needed".

Really? Really???"

Haha. I feel your pain.

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By *ike4362ukMan
over a year ago

Cheshunt

"I saw an advert for an automated dispenser for hand cleanser, simply hold your hand underneath and get an automatic squirt of soap in your hands.

Saves touching a dirty tap. The idea is all taps are covered in germs, so turn the tap on, then use the dispenser for your soap.

Perfect. But when you've washed your hands you still have to touch the tap to turn it off.

Bizarre.....

Not in the toilets in The Oracle in Reading!! You don't touch the taps or soap- just wave your hands under & they work!!

Sorcery

"
BURN THE WITCH!

Oh sorry, wrong forum...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Polo the mint with the hole,

Why put the hole in it

So if it gets stuck in your throat you can still breath. Simples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The Green Button

(Sorry couldn't resist

)

Meant the green dot (which I no longer have)

Forgive me. Still clueless as to what you mean.

The green dot that shows at side of profile to say you online. I've opted out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone asked me to invest in a diet cookie business.

Meal replacement, have a healthy cookie instead of a meal and lose weight.

I felt there was a flaw in the business plan.

If it works people will stop buying them.

If it doesn't work people will stop buying them.

lol, I wonder what "Slimming World's" secret to success is?

The secret is that most people don't get long term sustained weight loss, so keep paying"

Same as WW. they supply a range of targeted products that dont work that well, but rely on peer pressure to keep people paying. Smoke and mirrors in clever marketing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Computers. "To cut down the amount of paperwork needed".

Really? Really???

Haha. I feel your pain."

Yup. I have my own electric beach..4 computers with 6 screens. And 2 laptops.

Have been rewriting a lot of procedures to cut down on the amount of paperwork produced. Which produced more...

Cest la vie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dishwasher tablets with added salt. My dishwasher doesn't work unless the salt compartment is full, so what's the point in adding it to the tablets too?!

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Just seen an ad for squeeze bacon. Yes that is correct, bacon in a squeezy bottle that you squirt out like ketchup. I can't think of anything more eloquent to say other than WTF?

C...

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By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Dishwasher tablets with added salt. My dishwasher doesn't work unless the salt compartment is full, so what's the point in adding it to the tablets too?!

Our dishwasher works best with added wine.

I prefer red.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dishwasher tablets with added salt. My dishwasher doesn't work unless the salt compartment is full, so what's the point in adding it to the tablets too?!

Our dishwasher works best with added wine.

I prefer red.

A"
hahaha touché.

Banana hammocks.... Another of life's pointless inventions

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By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

One cup coffee machines.

What if you have a different sized mug to a standard one?

I have a two pint 'Size Matters!' Mug. I also have a large sports direct mug somebody at work bought me (may have been a whip round - they're fucking expensive at 99p!) neither of which gets filled via one push of the button.

Just boil a frigging kettle and if you need less water - put less in!

Meh!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it too late to say Iraq, Libya and Syria?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Oatsosimple now have about 3 product variants. Sachets for microwave, paper cups with it inside - add boiling water and other sachets to put in your own cup and add boiling water.

Its the same stuff, varying in price from a few pence a serving to closer to a quid, if you want their disposable cup.

Sell one product for boiling water or microwave use and let punters use their own cup. Seems overkill atm.

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

No need to get rid of the tax disc was there?

Served as a reminder

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By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"No need to get rid of the tax disc was there?

Served as a reminder"

Isn't that why it was scrapped?

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By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"One cup coffee machines.

What if you have a different sized mug to a standard one?

Just boil a frigging kettle and if you need less water - put less in!

Meh!

Designed for the U.S. market where a cup is a standard size?

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"No need to get rid of the tax disc was there?

Served as a reminder

Isn't that why it was scrapped?"

I dont know I havent looked into it

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