FabSwingers.com forum: Cringe

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Anyone got any sexual experiences they still dwell on and cringe? I remember in my early 20s going home with a girl and performing 'enthusiastic oral pleasure' for quite a while and in the morning after sobering up, seeing used tampons next to her bed.

To this day I still wonder (and hope) that they were not fresh! I didn't appear to have any war paint on next morning so I tell myself that I'm sure they weren't, but theres always that niggling doubt......!

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"Anyone got any sexual experiences they still dwell on and cringe? I remember in my early 20s going home with a girl and performing 'enthusiastic oral pleasure' for quite a while and in the morning after sobering up, seeing used tampons next to her bed.

Lol - that's bad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Done the very same thing in my army days, however I never saw any used tampons and walked back to camp through the town centre with said "war paint" on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Lol my first gf, with no warning, flicked me on one singular testicle! When I screamed "what the fuck was that for!?", she kinda looked surprised and answered, " I thought you might like it."!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick."

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once went home with a girl from a club, had a fantastic night of sex then went home. Got a text from her a few hours later to say she's enjoyed the night but was now in hospital as she'd forgotten to take her tampon out before we started and now it was wedged up and she couldn't get it out.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch."

I used to like beef monster munch :/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

I used to like beef monster munch :/"

Hahahahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh that is NASTY! (and why I use a Moon Cup.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

I used to like beef monster munch :/"

Scampy fries were marginally better

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!! "

This was more like a feeding frenzy in the Piranha tank

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch."
I've just sicked in my mouth a little bit

Poor girl. Bet she was mortified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

I thought you liked it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch. I've just sicked in my mouth a little bit

Poor girl. Bet she was mortified

Not so much!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/06/15 01:20:13]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

I used to like beef monster munch :/

Scampy fries were marginally better

"
they still are! And frazzles. I always make my dad buy me scampi fries if I gate crash him at the pub. He moans the entire time that I'm eating them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh that is NASTY! (and why I use a Moon Cup.)"

Off to Google Moon Cup!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh, then there was the time when I was learning how to squirt, said ex gf was fingering me and licking my clit at the same time. Thought I did squirt, instead I had straight up pissed on her face. Like, actual proper piss.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

I used to like beef monster munch :/

Scampy fries were marginally better

they still are! And frazzles. I always make my dad buy me scampi fries if I gate crash him at the pub. He moans the entire time that I'm eating them

Scampi fries are just wrong, on every level.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!! "

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I once went home with a girl from a club, had a fantastic night of sex then went home. Got a text from her a few hours later to say she's enjoyed the night but was now in hospital as she'd forgotten to take her tampon out before we started and now it was wedged up and she couldn't get it out.....

Bet she was thinking ,"Wow, this guy's HUGE....but with oddly varying girth?"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh, then there was the time when I was learning how to squirt, said ex gf was fingering me and licking my clit at the same time. Thought I did squirt, instead I had straight up pissed on her face. Like, actual proper piss."

These are supposed to be embarrassing stories not hot ones!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

I used to like beef monster munch :/

Scampy fries were marginally better

they still are! And frazzles. I always make my dad buy me scampi fries if I gate crash him at the pub. He moans the entire time that I'm eating them

Frazzles haha, the only time you can have a bacon roll without putting the cooker on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

These are supposed to be embarrassing stories not hot ones!

If that's what you like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

Well well well....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

Well well well....

Give me a kit Kat and I'll show ya haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

Well well well....

Give me a kit Kat and I'll show ya haha "

Will a Chomp work?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

Well well well....

Give me a kit Kat and I'll show ya haha

Will a Chomp work?

What about a nice bit of Fudge?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was fisting my ex girlfriend, pulled my hand out and it was covered with brown old blood that smelt like beef Monster Munch.

I used to like beef monster munch :/

Scampy fries were marginally better

they still are! And frazzles. I always make my dad buy me scampi fries if I gate crash him at the pub. He moans the entire time that I'm eating them

Scampi fries are just wrong, on every level."

What about Nik Naks, what level do you like yours at?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

Well well well....

Give me a kit Kat and I'll show ya haha

Will a Chomp work?

What about a nice bit of Fudge?

I do like a nice bit of fudge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't dwell on it, i try not to think about it, but someone thought that scraping their teeth down my cock mid BJ was erotic and pleasurable.....no, no,no, no,NO!!!!

Damn. That's my party trick.

Done correctly it is quite a trick!!

My party trick is being able to fit a whole 4 finger kit Kat in my mouth sideways

Well well well....

Give me a kit Kat and I'll show ya haha

Will a Chomp work?

Well it would certainly be an excellent start.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

These are supposed to be embarrassing stories not hot ones!

If that's what you like

I'm saying nothing without my lawyer present !)

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Ok.

So I met this guy last year who was a bit on the young side - 19 - but he was stunningly handsome so I couldn't help myself.

We meet, go out for some drinks. It's all fine, blah blah, chat chat. The convo turns increasingly sexual and I think, oh, I'm in here.

Then he flips.

Starts going on about how he wants me to beat him up. Not a bit of slap and tickle but proper bloodied & battered.

I was like, uh, you didn't mention *any* of this before?

To cut a long story short, he wanted me to drag him off to an alleyway, beat him, piss on him and r@pe him. :/

I've never finished a date before with "I think you should fuck off now and get your train"

He was only young.

Think what he'd be like after a bit of practice.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ok.

So I met this guy last year who was a bit on the young side - 19 - but he was stunningly handsome so I couldn't help myself.

We meet, go out for some drinks. It's all fine, blah blah, chat chat. The convo turns increasingly sexual and I think, oh, I'm in here.

Then he flips.

Starts going on about how he wants me to beat him up. Not a bit of slap and tickle but proper bloodied & battered.

I was like, uh, you didn't mention *any* of this before?

To cut a long story short, he wanted me to drag him off to an alleyway, beat him, piss on him and r@pe him. :/

I've never finished a date before with "I think you should fuck off now and get your train"

He was only young.

Think what he'd be like after a bit of practice. "

I blame the internet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok.

So I met this guy last year who was a bit on the young side - 19 - but he was stunningly handsome so I couldn't help myself.

We meet, go out for some drinks. It's all fine, blah blah, chat chat. The convo turns increasingly sexual and I think, oh, I'm in here.

Then he flips.

Starts going on about how he wants me to beat him up. Not a bit of slap and tickle but proper bloodied & battered.

I was like, uh, you didn't mention *any* of this before?

To cut a long story short, he wanted me to drag him off to an alleyway, beat him, piss on him and r@pe him. :/

I've never finished a date before with "I think you should fuck off now and get your train"

He was only young.

Think what he'd be like after a bit of practice.

I blame the internet"

I blame the sunshine, the moonlight, the good times and the boogie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't BEAT that

but I did meet a lass once found her fit we both got on well blah blah so I offered to give her a lift home on the way she slipped her thongs off pulled out her tampon and said fuck me! That was a bit off putting

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By *lewelyn23Man
over a year ago

swansea

"Can't BEAT that

At least she didn't throw it at you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can't BEAT that

At least she didn't throw it at you."
true I suppose it could have been worse

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By *lewelyn23Man
over a year ago

swansea

"Can't BEAT that

At least she didn't throw it at you.true I suppose it could have been worse"

Can always get worse.

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

Was at a local pub at Xmas and bumped in to a bloke I hadn't seen in 20 years.

First thing he says to me?

"Didn't you fuck that girl under the kitchen table at Chris' party?"

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

...then there was the guy who wanted me to 'cash r@ape' him.

I was like WTF? I'm outta here...

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

...mmm, and while I think of it, that guy with the dog fetish lolol

Wanted me to 'mount' him and breed him and call him my bitch.

Actually brought a proper dig collar & lead.

Had a lightly panicky txt from him a couple hrs before we were supposed to meet saying he'd 'forgotten his funnel' and could I bring one from home.

I politely declined. Good shag tho'

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"...mmm, and while I think of it, that guy with the dog fetish lolol

Wanted me to 'mount' him and breed him and call him my bitch.

Actually brought a proper dig collar & lead.

Had a lightly panicky txt from him a couple hrs before we were supposed to meet saying he'd 'forgotten his funnel' and could I bring one from home.

I politely declined. Good shag tho'"

OK you're winning...

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

"...mmm, and while I think of it, that guy with the dog fetish lolol

Wanted me to 'mount' him and breed him and call him my bitch.

Actually brought a proper dig collar & lead.

Had a lightly panicky txt from him a couple hrs before we were supposed to meet saying he'd 'forgotten his funnel' and could I bring one from home.

I politely declined. Good shag tho'

OK you're winning..."

Lol

Plenty more where that came from

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By *iamondjoeMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

That time when I was banging a chick on my bedroom floor and my mum *and one of her friends* came upstairs to have a look at the rug we were shagging on.

Everyone was mortified, except for my mother who twittered around as if nothing was happening :/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Diamondjoe is definitely winning

Can't top any of those

but cringe wise, even though I am cut, have split what's left of my foreskin (just below my bell end) on several occasions. Worst kind of stingy pain ever

And of course no sex until it heals up. All down to too much vigorous sex. Older and slower now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spent ages trying to make a big fat one night stand come with my tongue, nearly puked when i realised it wasnt her clit but a skin tag growth yuuuukkkkkk!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone I know honked up on their bfs cock before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting how so many of the stories involve tampons!

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

We met a guy once who had just got a new bed but hadn't attached the slats properly so every time any one went anywhere near it the middle fell through

I kept saying just leave it and we can play on the mattress but he was having none of it and kept trying to fix it.

I was playing with both guys when the bed fell through again just as my OH cum shooting all over us both as we fell into the hole

The guy is a good friend and we have met him lots of times since with no other incidents

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone I know honked up on their bfs cock before "

mine wasn't over a b/f ~ funnily enough he didn't seem interested in becoming one after that......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Interesting how so many of the stories involve tampons!"

was just thinking the thread had a certain lean to it

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

"Someone I know honked up on their bfs cock before

mine wasn't over a b/f ~ funnily enough he didn't seem interested in becoming one after that......

Wimp

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Someone please tell me that I'm not the only person who checks these threads just to see if any past meets have namechecked me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not particularly a cringe - but i lost my virginity to my ex - just after the first time we did the deed and he says - well lets have a look at you then - it must have been a lights off and under the duvet event

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When i was much younger i went home with a girl for a one night stand and it turned into a complete nightmare !!!

I'd been drinking since early afternoon and it was now 1am and i wasn't really up for it but she was adamant ! So get back to hers and straight at it and this is where it all went wrong .... First i fall asleep while being down on her and she flips ( my bad) then i need a piss so i go downstairs to the toilet in the dark and something squishy comes up between my toes ! Yep dog shit ! Fuming but feel so bad about falling asleep on her so wash it off and go again ( no sleeping this time) and the bloody bed breaks! then to top it off i call a cab and when i leave I'm confronted by a 6ft 5 bloke build like a Marine try to open the taxi door saying he's gonna rip my head off ( Boyfriend)

Seen her a few weeks later and had the cheek to ask if I'd like to go back with her !..... Another cringe moment was when a girlfriends Dad had taken all the doors off for sanding and her Mum walked in with a pile of clothes and I'm perched on the edge of the bed with her Daughter down to the base of my cock!!! Instant shock was made worse as she let out a "Ooooo" then carried on putting her clothes on the bed then left! Gotta be honest though my girl was a dirty little thing who just berated her and carried on but for me the moment was gone

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By *ittle Pocket PerveWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

This thread is my favourite this morning, I know I shouldn't but I can't stop laughing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone I know honked up on their bfs cock before

mine wasn't over a b/f ~ funnily enough he didn't seem interested in becoming one after that......

Wimp

Exactly!!

I did tell him to stop pushing my head down......

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