FabSwingers.com forum: Polygamy...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

If approched would you consider it?

If you are a women would you want 3 in the relationship

Same for men, would you want 3 in the relationship?

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

I wouldn't want more women. Most men struggle to keep up with MY sex drive alone, so having to share him with 3 other women I imagine would leave me extremely unsatisfied.

More than one man, on the other hand...

- Amy. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No thanks. That is more to do with love and marriage. Would not want either of us to be in love with another person!

Mind you less cooking and cleaning????

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

"No thanks. That is more to do with love and marriage. Would not want either of us to be in love with another person!"

This too, of course. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If approched would you consider it?

If you are a women would you want 3 in the relationship

Same for men, would you want 3 in the relationship?

Polygymy is the status of being married to more than one person (which is not permitted in the UK). I think you mean polyamory which is having multiple relationships with multiple people.

I am polyamorous. It's great. I couldn't imagine my life any other way.

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By *oward1978Man
over a year ago

Rotherham

As a man I quite like the idea of a whole hareem of women. The reality may not be so great though. Could you imagine all the nagging?! One woman's bad enough

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If approched would you consider it?

If you are a women would you want 3 in the relationship

Same for men, would you want 3 in the relationship?

Polygymy is the status of being married to more than one person (which is not permitted in the UK). I think you mean polyamory which is having multiple relationships with multiple people.

I am polyamorous. It's great. I couldn't imagine my life any other way."

Could 3 living the life of 3 in a marriage be classed Polygymy.

Is polyamorous not having more then one lover.

This is a question rather then stating a fact

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I was reading a magazine article about it.

This lady was with a guy (can't remember if married) and they lived together and dated others. He basically had more in common with one on the women he was dating, she couldn't handle it so they split. She has a boyfriend now who lives with her full time and they have 2 children. He dates other and she searched on line for another guy to join. She found another guy and he is a live in partner 3 times a week. She decides on the night whether she is going to sleep with boyfriend 1 or boyfriend 2.

She likes the idea for many reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could 3 living the life of 3 in a marriage be classed Polygymy.

Is polyamorous not having more then one lover.

This is a question rather then stating a fact

Polygamy is specifically the word for *marriage* to multiple partners. (Polygyny is being married to multiple women and polyandry is being married to multiple men).

Polyamory is the status of being open to multiple relationships with multiple partners - in various forms. It's basically the opposite to saying 'I'm monogamous'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was reading a magazine article about it.

She likes the idea for many reasons. "

One of my friends lives with two male partners (and their children) and they have a great life. It really works for them.

I don't live with multiple partners, but it's something that myself and my nesting partner aren't closed off to as an idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If everyone is happy then it sounds a great idea.

Why not live your life how you want and not how people presume you should.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If approched would you consider it?

If you are a women would you want 3 in the relationship

Same for men, would you want 3 in the relationship?

Polygymy is the status of being married to more than one person (which is not permitted in the UK). I think you mean polyamory which is having multiple relationships with multiple people.

I am polyamorous. It's great. I couldn't imagine my life any other way."

Oops, yes that's what I mean, thankyou

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"As a man I quite like the idea of a whole hareem of women. The reality may not be so great though. Could you imagine all the nagging?! One woman's bad enough

Ooooosh! If only you didn't have a great arse!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I don't think I could be in a polygamous relationship. I don't mind sharing but my toys are my toys at the end of the day

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't think I could be in a polygamous relationship. I don't mind sharing but my toys are my toys at the end of the day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't think I could be in a polygamous relationship. I don't mind sharing but my toys are my toys at the end of the day

Ah you see, I don't think of people as my toys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I much prefer a 1 - 1 relationship with possible additions from time to time.

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman
over a year ago

Hereabouts

I'd be lucky enough to have one person! I wouldn't say no to this type of relationship though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It can be a tricky one .... How can you share your love and emotions equally..... Just doesn't work... Someone somewhere will always feel the third.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It can be a tricky one .... How can you share your love and emotions equally..... Just doesn't work... Someone somewhere will always feel the third. "

1. How does that work when it comes to children for example? The reality is that you always prefer one child I guess, but that doesn't stop you from having two or three.

2. Why does everything in life have to be 'equal'? My partners know that I feel different things for different people. For instance I have more intense and deeper emotions for my sub who I've been going out with for three (four?) years. In contrast the partner I live with I feel less for, but it doesn't worry him. It's just how things work.

3. Emotions are abundant and self perpetuating. The more 'care and emotion' you give away, the more you have to give. It's not a limited supply, you can give out as much as you want.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

[Removed by poster at 01/06/15 12:44:54]

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I don't think I could be in a polygamous relationship. I don't mind sharing but my toys are my toys at the end of the day

Ah you see, I don't think of people as my toys.

Lol neither do I....just a figure of speech.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It can be a tricky one .... How can you share your love and emotions equally..... Just doesn't work... Someone somewhere will always feel the third.

1. How does that work when it comes to children for example? The reality is that you always prefer one child I guess, but that doesn't stop you from having two or three.

3. Emotions are abundant and self perpetuating. The more 'care and emotion' you give away, the more you have to give. It's not a limited supply, you can give out as much as you want."

The love for a child is uncondintonal be that your first or your fifth..... You are taking that out of context....

And you are putting up your opionion against mine.... I see things as equally... I personally have seen a lot have a primary relationship so there is a ratio already put in place.

True on your third point but still think at times that others would feel different to the primary relationship.

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

It's not for me. I love my husband and we play with other people, some of them we are very friendly with and we love them but as friends and not even nearly way as we love each other. I would be devestated if my OH loved another person the same way or more than he loved me.

We have chosen to spend our lives together but people we meet on here we chose to spend a finite period of time with usually 2 hours or 4 hours......not even nearly the same thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't mind the idea at all, as long as the dynamic of the relationship works, not too say it couldn't have significant pitfalls too deal with, I am a very emotionally deep person most of the time, but I think loving more than one person deeply at a time could be problematic, particularly if one or more parties changed rules or goal posts all the time.. relationships are always complicated, multiple people in one sounds difficult.maybe that is why manogamy is so popular.

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By *arlock69Man
over a year ago

Batley... (near Leeds)

"Could 3 living the life of 3 in a marriage be classed Polygymy.

Is polyamorous not having more then one lover.

This is a question rather then stating a fact

Polygamy is specifically the word for *marriage* to multiple partners. (Polygyny is being married to multiple women and polyandry is being married to multiple men).

Polyamory is the status of being open to multiple relationships with multiple partners - in various forms. It's basically the opposite to saying 'I'm monogamous'."

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By *arlock69Man
over a year ago

Batley... (near Leeds)

"It can be a tricky one .... How can you share your love and emotions equally..... Just doesn't work... Someone somewhere will always feel the third.

1. How does that work when it comes to children for example? The reality is that you always prefer one child I guess, but that doesn't stop you from having two or three.

3. Emotions are abundant and self perpetuating. The more 'care and emotion' you give away, the more you have to give. It's not a limited supply, you can give out as much as you want."

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I don't live with multiple partners, but it's something that myself and my nesting partner aren't closed off to as an idea."

Aww 'nesting partner' - I love that phrase, I want one!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The love for a child is uncondintonal be that your first or your fifth..... You are taking that out of context....

And you are putting up your opionion against mine.... I see things as equally... I personally have seen a lot have a primary relationship so there is a ratio already put in place.

True on your third point but still think at times that others would feel different to the primary relationship. "

I feel for my partners unconditionally. All of them.

It is true that many people have 'primaries' and 'secondaries' - and indeed many people are happy with that. But there are many of us who don't put hierarchies into our relationships in that way - roughly it's called Relationship Anarchy as a movement. And it's great.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't live with multiple partners, but it's something that myself and my nesting partner aren't closed off to as an idea.

Aww 'nesting partner' - I love that phrase, I want one!!

Ah he's fabulous. He's the only one of my partners who I allow to do the washing up.

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By *atcherofmyballsMan
over a year ago

hereford

I don't live with multiple partners, but it's something that myself and my nesting partner aren't closed off to as an idea.

Aww 'nesting partner' - I love that phrase, I want one!!

Tweet tweet

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By *ovely CummingsWoman
over a year ago

Peaky Nipples

"It can be a tricky one .... How can you share your love and emotions equally..... Just doesn't work... Someone somewhere will always feel the third. "

It works when you accept the concept that love is not a finite emotion and that, just in the same way as your love grows for each child you have, it can for others in your life

Love, is love, there aren't separate categories for differnt types of people, not unless you put them there for yourself

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By *ench and StripeCouple
over a year ago

Stenalees

Its something we have discussed a little. Potentially we like the idea of adding a 3rd person to our relationship but not sure if it will ever happen. Elley has a jealous streak that pops out now and then and would be a stumbling block no matter how much we loved our 3rd.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its something we have discussed a little. Potentially we like the idea of adding a 3rd person to our relationship but not sure if it will ever happen. Elley has a jealous streak that pops out now and then and would be a stumbling block no matter how much we loved our 3rd."

You have to want to work at eradicating things like jealousy.

I used to be a very jealous person. I didn't want to be a jealous person anymore. When I first went poly it took me about a year, perhaps 18 months to get over jealousy. It wasn't the easiest thing to do, but the reward is wonderful. You just have to get used to seeing things in a different way (and you have to learn to not put 'the couple' first, and instead see yourself as individuals).

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By *nvictusMan
over a year ago

Beeston

Tried it with a lovely couple and it was fun, but ultimately not for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could do it with men but not other women involved. They create too much drama. I would want us to all share a bed though and have sex as and when we want,with whomever we want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope if I'm in a relationship it would the two of us ...and the occasional extra now and again for fun frolics

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

I'm increasingly thinking this may be something I am interested in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't think of anything worse for me. I don't like people to play with my stuff. I couldn't even swing with a partner. I get all jealous and insane.

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By *ench and StripeCouple
over a year ago

Stenalees

You have to want to work at eradicating things like jealousy.

Yes very true. We have been together for 15 years now and we have swung for about a year seriously. We have learned quite a lot about each other during that year. Adding another person to our relationship would never have come up if we hadn't.

We have people we know both in and out of the scene that we would be interested in finding a more intimate balance with. However I (Mr) think its currently unlikely both as Elle gets jealous and finds it very hard and also social norms mean that those outside the swinging scene would be unaccepting of the situation.

Currently friends and playmates is all.

Maybe in the future.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I was asked if I wanted to join a couple a couple years ago.

She was a... Erm lets just say she got paid to do a lot of things.

They wanted another girl involved for the male of the couple whilst she was "busy"

I declined.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id have 2 wives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with Wasp_Hunter, relationships are what Polyamory is about. Can be different types of relationships. Trust, honesty, love and such attributes are at the core much more than just sex.

You seem very together Wasp_Hunter on this. Respect your perspective.

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"Polygamy...

If approched would you consider it?"

Ahh, Polygami, the art of folding parrots.

No, not since the RSPB got that injunction against me

We are very new to this whole thing, and though we've been surprised how little jealousy has entered into stuff, I still think you have to be remarkably self-confident and trusting to make it work. It's one of the reasons I like reading WH's posts, I find them very enlightening.

But personally I know 2 women'd just gang up on me, and it would be nothing but BGTalent and Corrie

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trusting? Yes.

Self-confident? No, I'm certainly not.

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Trusting? Yes.

Self-confident? No, I'm certainly not."

Compared to us you certainly come across well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trusting? Yes.

Self-confident? No, I'm certainly not.

Compared to us you certainly come across well.

I'm a writer by profession. By it's very nature it means that you have to have a talent for persuasion through writing!

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By *arlock69Man
over a year ago

Batley... (near Leeds)

I'd rather have poly relationship than just a fuck with a stranger

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By *andS66Couple
over a year ago

Derby

I don't live with multiple partners, but it's something that myself and my nesting partner aren't closed off to as an idea.

Aww 'nesting partner' - I love that phrase, I want one!!

Ah he's fabulous. He's the only one of my partners who I allow to do the washing up.

Why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't live with multiple partners, but it's something that myself and my nesting partner aren't closed off to as an idea.

Aww 'nesting partner' - I love that phrase, I want one!!

Ah he's fabulous. He's the only one of my partners who I allow to do the washing up.

Why?"

It was a joke based on the fact we live together.

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By *eavy Metal BallzMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I don't think I could be in a polygamous relationship. I don't mind sharing but my toys are my toys at the end of the day

Ah you see, I don't think of people as my toys.

Brilliant..

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By *rivate roomMan
over a year ago

Bracknell

in love with many people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It can be a tricky one .... How can you share your love and emotions equally..... Just doesn't work... Someone somewhere will always feel the third.

1. How does that work when it comes to children for example? The reality is that you always prefer one child I guess, but that doesn't stop you from having two or three.

3. Emotions are abundant and self perpetuating. The more 'care and emotion' you give away, the more you have to give. It's not a limited supply, you can give out as much as you want."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If approched would you consider it?

If you are a women would you want 3 in the relationship

Same for men, would you want 3 in the relationship?

Absolutely not.

Our relationship is ours. When we swing it is about the enjoyment of the act, not about love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wouldn't be for me, I would swing with a partner(if I felt incline to date again) but thats as far as I could go.

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