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Honest opinions wanted guys please

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So in June it will be my 20+20 birthday don't go out a lot to socialise because of commitment and was looking forward to planning something for my special day. Had an invite today for the surprise 30th party of another family member to be thrown on my birthday. Would you be annoyed or not?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I now feel obliged to go to this party rather than make my own plans to celebrate my own special day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How close is this family member.

If it was my 40th I would tend to be selfish and do my own thing.

A 30th isn't a big deal.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

She's quite close but she has got a lot of things planned to celebrate her special day spreading over a few days in June.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't think it's a trick and really a surprise for u?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No it definitely is for her. She loves the limelight which is great but just think it's a bit insensitive to be thrown on my birthday. Wouldn't care if it was any other birthday

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"So in June it will be my 20+20 birthday don't go out a lot to socialise because of commitment and was looking forward to planning something for my special day. Had an invite today for the surprise 30th party of another family member to be thrown on my birthday. Would you be annoyed or not? "

Without knowing the dynamics within your family I wouldn't like to say but as said above could it be a surprise party for you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"She's quite close but she has got a lot of things planned to celebrate her special day spreading over a few days in June. "

Sounds like she craves attention. If there's a few events she won't miss you at one of them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Too many of the "other side" of their family have been given invitations. I'm not so bothered about it being thrown on my birthday but that I now feel obliged to go to the party when I would have liked to have done my own thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally if u don't think its a surprise I would say something

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"No it definitely is for her. She loves the limelight which is great but just think it's a bit insensitive to be thrown on my birthday. Wouldn't care if it was any other birthday "

Say something, ask if they forgot it was your 40th. You might understand the reasoning behind this party then and feel better

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I don't want to upset anyone though as that would make me look selfish and I'm really not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people do like to over celebrate their birthdays.

You should do what you want to do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So do ye both share the same birthday then?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Too many of the "other side" of their family have been given invitations. I'm not so bothered about it being thrown on my birthday but that I now feel obliged to go to the party when I would have liked to have done my own thing "

You aren't obliged though, all you need do is say "I won't be able to come as its my 40th"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Too many of the "other side" of their family have been given invitations. I'm not so bothered about it being thrown on my birthday but that I now feel obliged to go to the party when I would have liked to have done my own thing "

If it was my 40th on that day.. I wouldn't hesitate to not go...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I don't want to upset anyone though as that would make me look selfish and I'm really not. "

Hmmm. Celebrating your birthday on the actual day isn't selfish. If you spend your life doing things so that you don't look selfish you're going to enter your forties feeling unhappy.

My advice would be speak up or go to the party with good grace.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June "

So hers is mid june but theyve organised all this for her on your actually birthday in early june??? Get to fuck...id go arrange my own thing for my own special day, bollocks to that!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June

So hers is mid june but theyve organised all this for her on your actually birthday in early june??? Get to fuck...id go arrange my own thing for my own special day, bollocks to that!!"

Yep she's got a number of different things planned with friends, family and then both combined.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I'd be a bit miffed OP. Get your friends together, much more fun!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So in June it will be my 20+20 birthday don't go out a lot to socialise because of commitment and was looking forward to planning something for my special day. Had an invite today for the surprise 30th party of another family member to be thrown on my birthday. Would you be annoyed or not? "

Try your Mother remarrying on your birthday because she wanted it to be a "Special Day"

But to be honest, did they know it was your birthday, and have you celebrated them in the past?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Wow that's a bit of a bugger too!! Yes they knew it was my birthday as it's quite close family. I don't celebrate as big as her but we are two different personalities.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Just say 'I'm sorry but its actually my (special age) birthday that day, and I have made plans'. Even if you haven't yet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How close is this family member.

If it was my 40th I would tend to be selfish and do my own thing.

A 30th isn't a big deal. "

^^ This. 40 30. Way more important to celebrate a 40th.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June

So hers is mid june but theyve organised all this for her on your actually birthday in early june??? Get to fuck...id go arrange my own thing for my own special day, bollocks to that!!

Yep she's got a number of different things planned with friends, family and then both combined. "

Just a twist. Are you not being as precious as her?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June

So hers is mid june but theyve organised all this for her on your actually birthday in early june??? Get to fuck...id go arrange my own thing for my own special day, bollocks to that!!

Yep she's got a number of different things planned with friends, family and then both combined.

Just a twist. Are you not being as precious as her?"

In what way ?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June

So hers is mid june but theyve organised all this for her on your actually birthday in early june??? Get to fuck...id go arrange my own thing for my own special day, bollocks to that!!

Yep she's got a number of different things planned with friends, family and then both combined.

Just a twist. Are you not being as precious as her?"

I'd be bloody precious when it comes to my birthday. How hard is it for people to make an effort? Its only one day a year!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This shouldnt even be in debate...its your birthday, not hers. Thats a no brainer!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No mine is the beginning of June hers is mid June

So hers is mid june but theyve organised all this for her on your actually birthday in early june??? Get to fuck...id go arrange my own thing for my own special day, bollocks to that!!

Yep she's got a number of different things planned with friends, family and then both combined.

Just a twist. Are you not being as precious as her?"

What an odd suggestion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its your 40th, just point out you would like to celebrate your own birthday, on the day, not someone elses a fortnight early.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Speak to the people involved. It's the only way you will understand what's going on, reading all the different inferences being made here won't help because none of us can possibly know their motives. do you really want to stew about it without letting them know you have a problem and spend your birthday feeling bad?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Speak to the people involved. It's the only way you will understand what's going on, reading all the different inferences being made here won't help because none of us can possibly know their motives. do you really want to stew about it without letting them know you have a problem and spend your birthday feeling bad?"

No I don't want to feel bad at all. I'm grateful for everyone's input as I thought I was a little selfish to be annoyed at what has been arranged. I'm sure it wasn't done with any malice as the person who organised it doesnt have a nasty bone in their body

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you told her you were planning your birthday event on that day? Dunno how close you are but i would have mentioned that first, and if she couldn't change the day then ask about making it a double celebration, party for both of you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ought I pop out of your birthday cake?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ought I pop out of your birthday cake?"

Now that would be a nice surprise

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