FabSwingers.com forum: How to spot fakes and timewasters

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Won't reply to messages when you ask them to name a place and time.

Only tell you the male is meeting at the moment.

Like to talk about what they plan to do with you.

Keep cancelling when you've arranged to meet them (mother in hospital, brother has just turned up, cat has gone missing etc)

Feel free to add your favourites

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Difficult getting time off work.

Haven't been told my shifts yet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask you to talk dirty or send pics

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

Tenbury Wells

Don't read profiles

Don't call ever

Don't have verifications

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By *epper123Woman
over a year ago

London

"Difficult getting time off work.

Haven't been told my shifts yet."

We have heard this from people we have met, does not necessarily mean they are time wasters.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Want to chat on kik or somewhere you can privately trade pics or cam. Despite your profile saying you don't do this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Arrange meet, then give them address and they either hide account, make excuses or just dont turn up, which proper freaks us out lol x

Last one was apparently lost asked to listen in on phone... blocked!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Difficult getting time off work.

Haven't been told my shifts yet.

We have heard this from people we have met, does not necessarily mean they are time wasters. "

No, but if used often it does draw you to that possibility.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was meeting people off here I never entertained nothing. If they matched what I was looking for physically, I'd ask for a coffee social and get it arranged, if they messaged asking what I was in to or what I'd like to do I'd just say "I'll tell you when I see you"

I wouldn't exchange pictures or fuck all until I'd met them in the flesh and rightly so cos out of the 40 or something people I've met socially in my local costa's, only one of them was worthy of fucking.

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By *ilmiss75Woman
over a year ago

Thornton

"Difficult getting time off work.

Haven't been told my shifts yet.

We have heard this from people we have met, does not necessarily mean they are time wasters.

No, but if used often it does draw you to that possibility."

I only get my rota one week at a time and can change at anytime. I do make this clear when arranging meets and have never let anyone down.

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By *icarswife45Woman
over a year ago

wiltshire town near Bath

I was on my way and had a car crash ended up in A&E,This excuse has been used twice now....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I was meeting people off here I never entertained nothing. If they matched what I was looking for physically, I'd ask for a coffee social and get it arranged, if they messaged asking what I was in to or what I'd like to do I'd just say "I'll tell you when I see you"

... "

I don't think the people sending the daft mails are the timewasters. It's the idiots that put up with that shit...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Telling you they really want to meet, speaking daily, saying they don't do clubs and group stuff, then reading via verifications about a club weekend in all its details...

What is the point? Lol I swear some people get kicks out of lying. Do what you want, it's fab, but don't lie about it!

Hook. Line and sinker. I'm a mug sometimes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use tineye for pic searching on cropped professional photos.

But the usual ones are those who want to cam or ask you for pics when you already have some uploaded.

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

Hmm, let's think a little....

Want to meet but don't have any pics or veris, been here for over a year and said many times they'll send their pic and update their profile but haven't done such.

At the last minute they change the venue to over 60 miles away knowing full well that isn't possible mid week.

Lost count of the number of wifes/gf setting up fantasy dates whilst they're at work, lol.

Oh, and the untraceable one time veris who have their profile hidden, sender has veris hidden (maybe real btw but you get that whiff), etc etc,. All of that stuff and plenty, plenty more. Funny and a fab place this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good on you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people should just trust their gut, if something or someone sounds too good to be true, if someone seems like all they want to do is message and exchange pictures and all that sort of caper. Ain't nobody got time for that!

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

"Want to chat on kik or somewhere you can privately trade pics or cam. Despite your profile saying you don't do this.

It's become a standard trademark of late, to do this. Long before I'm even much more than a little curious that they may hold any value for me at all.

You are wank fodder of the moment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/04/15 00:02:25]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So far it seems I am guilty of every one of these, am I a time waster?

Does anyone want to eat for a coffee?

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By *ral4bothMan
over a year ago

Harrow

People that have been on here over a year and have no verifications and you see them 2-3 times a week posting 'Meet Me' ads

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Though it can be fun playing 'excuse bingo'.

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Difficult getting time off work.

Haven't been told my shifts yet."

I work on an agency so only get my shifts a week in advance so I have used that one a few times

I must be a timewaster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unless someone has agreed to meet and didnt turn up then how are they timewasters? Just how long does it take to delete a message, must be all of 3 seconds!!!!!!

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By *.nottsbloke..Man
over a year ago

the vale

"I was on my way and had a car crash ended up in A&E,This excuse has been used twice now....

you should be on worlds most dangerous roads!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be wary of blokes in uniforms..

Fantasists..

The amount of crap they spin, hilarious.

They also latch onto disasters. Expect a run of I cant meet.. My cousin is missing in (insert latest natural disaster)

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

You can't always tell, that's the problem. I've been chatting away merrily with a couple of verified 'nice' guys recently who both went UNLOS after a month without any explanation shortly before we were due to meet. Married after all? Cold feet about a swingers site altogether? Who knows, it's the first time I've had that on here.

People are entitled to change their mind, for sure. But that is wasting my time regardless.

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By *ymph and ManicCouple
over a year ago

North East

We've had a couple(guy) message us and after arranging a social safe meet he failed to show up .. ... Lo and behold the same couple(guy) messaged us off a different profile three weeks later same pix etc asking for a meet ... site needs to police the crap element better and help improve site ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Freind requests without even saying hello.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

I've never had someone not turn up thankfully, but I do think people can waste your time if they chat with no intention of meeting.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

"Be wary of blokes in uniforms..

Fantasists..

I found one chap in the forum who was 'army' in a big way. Username reflected his job, pics of him in uniform, status update mentioning last chance of a meet before he went off to Afghanistan. The works. However, I just googled his username and found him on a fair few dating sites, where he was either ex army, a mercenary or something else

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Be wary of blokes in uniforms..

Fantasists..

I used to get so much of that on dating sites...Colonels in the British Army 'in charge of arminutions'....

Yea right!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can't always tell, that's the problem. I've been chatting away merrily with a couple of verified 'nice' guys recently who both went UNLOS after a month without any explanation shortly before we were due to meet. Married after all? Cold feet about a swingers site altogether? Who knows, it's the first time I've had that on here.

People are entitled to change their mind, for sure. But that is wasting my time regardless. "

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

I'm happy to kik on chat to people I intend to meet, if they then start constantly asking for pics, it's bye bye

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not even A

If someone doesn't turn up just shrug shoulders & go on to have a nice evening out...... Simple

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By *ricerMan
over a year ago

Stockton-on-Tees

I'm not particularly experienced when it comes to meets, though I have met a few off here, I've certainly not fucked my way through the site and despite being in several years only have one veri. Sadly you just can't stereotype real or fake, however a good majority of fakes would probably mirror my profile.

Generally (and now contradicting myself by offering stereotypes), the fakes on see are :-

No photo or veri;

Will upload photo and details Later(profile still same 2 years on);

Very basic details. Seemingly computer generated even ;

Standard 3 to 8 pics stolen from Facebook ;

Profiles with a phone number visible (these are usually revenge profiles created by ex's, or stalkers) ;

Users that have just split up with their ex (I know it does happen) and want to try something new;

Found one the other day that almost seemed genuine, until she quoted some Americanisms and offered an American phone number!!!

Looking at the site recently, I'd say that 75% of the profiles on it are fake - it's almost as if someone is paid to generate fake profiles.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

I've never had someone not turn up thankfully, but I do think people can waste your time if they chat with no intention of meeting."

But chat is just that - chat. If via message on here then unless you've specifically logged on for that one chat it's not wasting your time. If by phone - it's only time wasting if you had something more important to be doing than chatting.

It's easy to judge (using your own standards) if a conversation is going nowhere. At which point simply stop.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

I've never had someone not turn up thankfully, but I do think people can waste your time if they chat with no intention of meeting.

It's easy to judge (using your own standards) if a conversation is going nowhere. At which point simply stop.

Oh for sure, I have a very low boredom threshold and never feel obliged. But we will have to agree to disagree about the chatting wasting time. Conversations over several weeks can take a fair investment of time and energy, and are usually at the expense of other conversations - I have a limited capacity. So yes, if someone is deceiving me particularly, then I say my time has definitely been wasted.

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By *um4usbothCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

Lost internet connection so couldn't remember your address

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I live by 1 rule on here no one is real until i meet them at ie , club, social or face to face that why i never get bothered about all the true or untrue excuses you hear and it has worked wonders for me ever been let down yet .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

I've never had someone not turn up thankfully, but I do think people can waste your time if they chat with no intention of meeting.

It's easy to judge (using your own standards) if a conversation is going nowhere. At which point simply stop.

If it's enjoyable conversation overall then i don't feel i wasted my time, but yeah if it's someone only talking about meets and sex then that's a waste of my time.

Everyone will have their own idea of what enjoyable means and what is a waste of time. Interesting to see what people think is or isn't though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Want to chat on kik or somewhere you can privately trade pics or cam. Despite your profile saying you don't do this.

It's become a standard trademark of late, to do this. Long before I'm even much more than a little curious that they may hold any value for me at all.

You are wank fodder of the moment. "

I used to fall for it. Best ones are the ones who only try and dirty chat you and when you refuse to speak to them at all they start going on about 'when we meeting' like i'm gonna fall for that again.

I refuse to even add anyone to kik, skype or anything else now. There are guys who use these for meets though, bit unfair on them but i cba to find out which are genuine any more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"People only waste your time if

A.) specific plans have been made and they don't show up - everything else is just chat and easily deleted - hardly wasting time.

B.) you let them. If warning bells go off at any time cease contact.

Some peoples definitions of wasting time probably need a reality check.

I've never had someone not turn up thankfully, but I do think people can waste your time if they chat with no intention of meeting.

It's easy to judge (using your own standards) if a conversation is going nowhere. At which point simply stop.

If it's enjoyable conversation overall then i don't feel i wasted my time, but yeah if it's someone only talking about meets and sex then that's a waste of my time.

Everyone will have their own idea of what enjoyable means and what is a waste of time. Interesting to see what people think is or isn't though."

Yea, there are some people I just enjoy talking to who I may or may not meet one day, it matters not. But if the conversation is entirely directed towards meeting from the first...

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

From now on, you can all assume that I'm not ever ever gonna meet ya, so feel free to chat. That means if we ever do, it will be a happy bonus.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We've had a couple(guy) message us and after arranging a social safe meet he failed to show up .. ... Lo and behold the same couple(guy) messaged us off a different profile three weeks later same pix etc asking for a meet ... site needs to police the crap element better and help improve site ... "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Last weekend, on 3 separate occasions we had arranged a meet with a guy, all 3 where verified having met others, not one of them showed up and had blocked us, what are the odds of that happening!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" rightly so cos out of the 40 or something people I've met socially in my local costa's, only one of them was worthy of fucking. "

Maybe you've just been drinking in the wrong Costas

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

If someone was interviewing to fill a post and no candidates ever turned up .......

How long before they accept that they are either offering a crap proposition or simply have NO skills at picking the right people ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If someone was interviewing to fill a post and no candidates ever turned up .......

How long before they accept that they are either offering a crap proposition or simply have NO skills at picking the right people ?"

Aaaah I see what you did there, we must have no skills at picking the right people, but we are learning, just this morning i picked up on two separate bullshitters

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