FabSwingers.com forum: The absolute

By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Bollocks thread....yes let's just talk utter bollocks...I mean it's not as if that's new on the forums

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cheesy balls.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well la nuit dernière j'ai mangé une pomme

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By *hekaiserMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Bollocks thread....yes let's just talk utter bollocks...I mean it's not as if that's new on the forums

Erm..yer maw said naw...

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Cheesy balls."

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember knowing of a girl years ago that actually looked liked a "moomin"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well la nuit dernière j'ai mangé une pomme"

O ar your off for pint I get it!! ha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

my bicycle has a bell..

tra la la la la la..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Baldy balls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I remember knowing of a girl years ago that actually looked liked a "moomin"

Loved moomins, remember getting a book as a reading prize in middle school.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cojones

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today. "

Well I'm glad I made someone laugh today...if I die tonight I can think well I made Jim laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kiss my chuddies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today.

Well I'm glad I made someone laugh today...if I die tonight I can think well I made Jim laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cojones

Cotton Eye Joe's cojones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bollocks thread....yes let's just talk utter bollocks...I mean it's not as if that's new on the forums

Yip yip wibble wibble hatstand! Right said Fred

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I remember knowing of a girl years ago that actually looked liked a "moomin"

Do you know there's a new moomin film coming out

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature.

Bollocks! A moose is a cow drawn by a three year old.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cojones

Cotton Eye Joe's cojones."

Be careful not to confuse your conejos with your cojones!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kiss my chuddies "

Chuddies is chewing gum where I'm from

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature.

Bollocks! A moose is a cow drawn by a three year old. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fine words butter no parsnips

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

this site is full of fakes and anyone with verifications are fantasists

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today.

Well I'm glad I made someone laugh today...if I die tonight I can think well I made Jim laugh

"
if you die tonight will you come and be naughty with me so i can prove that there is an afterlife?

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today.

Well I'm glad I made someone laugh today...if I die tonight I can think well I made Jim laugh

if you die tonight will you come and be naughty with me so i can prove that there is an afterlife?

Ermmm no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was happily reading the thread till someone mentioned moomins.

I had a serious fear.of.those when i was little nightmares the lot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ohhh no problem monkey sox. your best bet is to follow your rubber duck . go right past the Christmas tree. then ya need..........................hang on let me think. yaaa , ya wanna follow your saxafone till ya reach the Y fronts and then bobs your teapot . alright ice-cream cone!

then what you want to do my china teapot is ice cream cone that top hat question and put it in your umbrella stand. ok snowflake

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today.

Well I'm glad I made someone laugh today...if I die tonight I can think well I made Jim laugh

if you die tonight will you come and be naughty with me so i can prove that there is an afterlife?

"
but no weird stuff!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I remember knowing of a girl years ago that actually looked liked a "moomin"

Do you know there's a new moomin film coming out

Nooooooo way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ohhh no problem monkey sox. your best bet is to follow your rubber duck . go right past the Christmas tree. then ya need..........................hang on let me think. yaaa , ya wanna follow your saxafone till ya reach the Y fronts and then bobs your teapot . alright ice-cream cone!

then what you want to do my china teapot is ice cream cone that top hat question and put it in your umbrella stand. ok snowflake "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like how nobody has so much as batted an eyelid by the fact that I was amused by Cheeky's cheesy cock.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

Always had a roof above me,

Always paid the rent,

I've never set foot inside a tent,

Can't build a fire to save my life.....

I lied about being the outdoor type

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheesy balls.

What to go with the cheesy cock and fishy fanny?

Your cheesy cock made me laugh earlier today.

Well I'm glad I made someone laugh today...if I die tonight I can think well I made Jim laugh

if you die tonight will you come and be naughty with me so i can prove that there is an afterlife?

Ermmm no

"
was only gonna ask for lotto numbers and national winner! You said talk bollocks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Went past a golf course today.."£10 for 9 holes"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, I went for a walk up to Williamsons park in Lancaster today...beautiful place, all landscaped woodland and ponds etc and climbed up to one of the higher little secluded parts of the park and just lay down using my rucksack as a pillow.

As the sun dipped and the light slowly faded five or six tiny flys appear, nothing much, the type of thing that gets in your eye when cycling down the canal you know....and they start flying random little patterns a few feet above me and it gets me thinking....why? Why here? Is it that I'm on the spot they would have been flying their random little flights anyhow? Or perhaps it's the imperceptible warmth I'm putting up to them?

And why ate they flying those patterns? They never seem to meet so I don't think they're mating...perhaps then a mating dance? Do flys do that? Do these particular flys do that? Do any? Do they know what they're doing and why? Does it make sense to them?

Are we the same? Living the random little dances of our lives? All dancing to slightly different patterns, all very different, but all making some sort of sense to us as people, but to the casual observer all essentially random yet the same as each other? I don't know...but still, the flys entertain me a while as I mull it over....

Much of the stuff we do is senseless and needless really, yet we do it...why? Does the thing that drives the fly to fly that pattern drive us to make our choices?

Then, from the darkening park....a bunch of f**king teenagers start shouting and being generally obnoxious....what t***s!

Time to go home...I'm gonna go back to that spot soon, see if my flys come out.

Or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spatula...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we got mice in the outside wall space - i am hoping thats bollocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Phenomenon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

then what you want to do my china teapot is ice cream cone that top hat question and put it in your umbrella stand. ok snowflake "
i like to make them into a sandwhich

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

I was mildly distracted with that geezer was impressed with a 'cheesy cock' post.

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By *educedWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I was mildly distracted with that geezer was impressed with a 'cheesy cock' post. "

*who

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I remember knowing of a girl years ago that actually looked liked a "moomin"

Do you know there's a new moomin film coming out

Nooooooo way

Yeah lol seen the trailer for it today at the cinema

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"we got mice in the outside wall space - i am hoping thats bollocks

Oh no where is Tom when you need him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, I went for a walk up to Williamsons park in Lancaster today...beautiful place, all landscaped woodland and ponds etc and climbed up to one of the higher little secluded parts of the park and just lay down using my rucksack as a pillow.

Much of the stuff we do is senseless and needless really, yet we do it...why? Does the thing that drives the fly to fly that pattern drive us to make our choices?

Then, from the darkening park....a bunch of f**king teenagers start shouting and being generally obnoxious....what t***s!

Time to go home...I'm gonna go back to that spot soon, see if my flys come out.

Or not. If you stand in cow shit they will

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

CLOSE YOUR EYES AND COUNT TO FUCK....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we got mice in the outside wall space - i am hoping thats bollocks

Oh no where is Tom when you need him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The sentence is about nothing.

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By *ngel n tedCouple
over a year ago

maidstone

I have poodle farm in new zealand

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"we got mice in the outside wall space - i am hoping thats bollocks

Oh no where is Tom when you need him

Can you hear them in the wall or something?

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

Posted a pic of my tits in a FB group, and the convo got round to a 3some with me and a chick eating bacon and melted cheese of a guys body.

Unfortunately the only guys in that group are in America.

So I am just crying into my spiced rum and now cause I really fancy summat with cheese and bacon without the hassle of walking out my front door.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

AXE WOUND!

For no other reason than I felt an irrational urge to shout it loudly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

Will have to detour past the garage i think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cheesy Dibbles, Skipper!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

Will have to detour past the garage i think

Bottle of Cabernet Shiraz now cracked open and I'm blaming it all on you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheesy Dibbles, Skipper!"

Haha, dibble me up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was going to write something and I got distracted by a teenager talking about golf. I can't play golf,I'd like to but I have arthritis so I can't. I'd like to ski too but my knees are dodgy so no joy there either. Ooh! I remember what I was going to say now,anyone see Eastenders last night? No? Me neither,it's a pile of shit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

Will have to detour past the garage i think

Bottle of Cabernet Shiraz now cracked open and I'm blaming it all on you

So unfair

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

Will have to detour past the garage i think

Bottle of Cabernet Shiraz now cracked open and I'm blaming it all on you

So unfair

"
fancy a glass?

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"Phenomenon"

doo doo de doo doo

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I'm now watching first dates

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im watching Skyfall, second time in two weeks

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By *uggarbunnyWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

I've just climbed into after mooching round medowhall shopping for hours and my feet are killing me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we got mice in the outside wall space - i am hoping thats bollocks

Oh no where is Tom when you need him

Can you hear them in the wall or something? "

yes - not tonight but the two previous nights - can hear them moving along

- apparently they can get in through a hole as thin as a pencil and they come in a t night to keep warm - we found a possible place but no way we believe a mouse could get in - so we put a stone in to see if they shift it or if it stops them -

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"we got mice in the outside wall space - i am hoping thats bollocks

Oh no where is Tom when you need him

Can you hear them in the wall or something?

yes - not tonight but the two previous nights - can hear them moving along

Oh I hope you have mice are horrible x.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't like to boast but I'm actually an astronaut.........

Professional space cadet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

Will have to detour past the garage i think

Bottle of Cabernet Shiraz now cracked open and I'm blaming it all on you

So unfair

fancy a glass?

Thanks

home and now have wine

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By *aughtySaucyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

margate

I'd like a few bollocks slapping against my ass now

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

"I'd like a few bollocks slapping against my ass now "

A few?? I can gather some up.. in a Tesco's carrier bag ok?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm on my way home from spending a couple of days with the in laws and the hard truth has just hit me. ....a damning realisation that there is no wine in at home

Oh no quick find an open offie

Will have to detour past the garage i think

Bottle of Cabernet Shiraz now cracked open and I'm blaming it all on you

So unfair

fancy a glass?

Thanks

home and now have wine

"
Enjoy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like a few bollocks slapping against my ass now

A few?? I can gather some up.. in a Tesco's carrier bag ok? "

Ya can fook right off with those shears!

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By *aughtySaucyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

margate

"I'd like a few bollocks slapping against my ass now

A few?? I can gather some up.. in a Tesco's carrier bag ok? "
a bag for life please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like a few bollocks slapping against my ass now

A few?? I can gather some up.. in a Tesco's carrier bag ok? a bag for life please

Ballbag for life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Labour will win the election by a landslide

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Labour will win the election by a landslide"

I see what you did there

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By *eerobCouple
over a year ago

solihull

Its at times like this i wish I'd listened to my mother

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Labour will win the election by a landslide

I see what you did there

Nothin clever intended

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Half past quarter to from. Caterpillars walking up walls changing lightbulbs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/04/15 07:08:42]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Bollocks removed by poster at 09/04/15 07:08:42]"

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"[Bollocks removed by poster at 09/04/15 07:08:42]"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bollocks, I've just hurt mine.

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By *isscheekychops OP Woman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Bollocks, I've just hurt mine.

Be more careful next time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bollocks, I've just hurt mine.

Be more careful next time

That's it, laugh it up at mans worst imaginable pain

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

mmm trimmed bollocks (and full) lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never mind the bollocks.

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