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advice regarding kids

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it's the kind of conversation you need to be having with the ex rather than a bunch of swinging strangers,

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

You see your son every OTHER weekend and a couple of hours ONE day a week. Your ex is a selfish cow expecting you to see your kid EVERY week.

Enjoy your beer...they'll get over it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you have set times to see him and you stick to that, then that should keep things simple. personally if I wasn't living with my kids I would jump at any opportunity to see them. However without knowing the situation, it is hard to comment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself"

Time to yourself ? You only see him a few hours and that's too much?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself"

only you know the real answer to that. my only very respectful piece of advice is whatever happens, however toxic it might get, don't let him know it's causing strife. too many parents (and you clearly aren't one) end up using the kids as weapons, or expecting them to join sides in a battle in which they are only victims.

but honestly, as a dad, you know deep down if you are pulling your weight. that's your call mate. best of luck

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By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

Confused by your post..not your turn but chose not to have him??....anyway, can only speak for myself but when I was in the same situation I missed my kids terribly so would have them with me at every opportunity. The way I saw it was if my wife and I were still together we would be bringing up the kids together...personal time becomes secondary. Paul

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By *ove bi guysWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

Look at it another way your ex possibly hasn't had any time to herself ... Easter holiday mean parent with care usually has them even longer.

Think you n ex need a conversation re expectations so you all know where you stand esp your child

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is completely the wrong place, as mentioned above. All that matters is your _iews, your ex's, and your sons.

For whatever reason, your ex is an ex, and that's not for our consumption either, but, seeing as you've asked,- I'd be wanting to see my son every day, not just once a fortnight for a day, and once a fortnight (alternative weeks) for a few hours. You have 6 nights a week for your own socialisation.. Bringing a child into the world means they come first. End of.

Sorry, but, you did ask for opinions. However, as I said, this is perhaps the wrong place to seek such opinions

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

son will see you as choosing footie and beer over seeing him - especially as ex wifey blown a fuse -

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Of course your allowed time to yourself and you get it 5 days a week, your ex needs a break too and relies on you for that at the weekends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself

only you know the real answer to that. my only very respectful piece of advice is whatever happens, however toxic it might get, don't let him know it's causing strife. too many parents (and you clearly aren't one) end up using the kids as weapons, or expecting them to join sides in a battle in which they are only victims.

but honestly, as a dad, you know deep down if you are pulling your weight. that's your call mate. best of luck"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have him every other weekend and the weekend I don't I see him for a few hours this is the first weekend I have not seen him since we split some need to read sorry if it not type right

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I have him every other weekend and the weekend I don't I see him for a few hours this is the first weekend I have not seen him since we split some need to read sorry if it not type right"

Oh I apologise do you see him even less than I thought you do and you still need time to yourself?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do those plans for yourself include the meet you're looking for on the site tonight? Your status and meet today give it away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope. You're not an A hole. In 10 years he's gonna choose beer over you I wonder what you gonna feel then

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Must state I can't see him during the week as I work 12 hour shifts on nights I would see him everyday if I could

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For whatever reason you only get to see your son once every fortnight, I presume he spends ALL of the remaining time with your ex? (He could live with a grandparent; I don't know)

I don't have kids but I would relish the chance to see them over the long easter weekend. Especially if I only saw them twice a month for less than a day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For whatever reason you only get to see your son once every fortnight, I presume he spends ALL of the remaining time with your ex? (He could live with a grandparent; I don't know)

I don't have kids but I would relish the chance to see them over the long easter weekend. Especially if I only saw them twice a month for less than a day."

. Millon times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Problem is you're usually seeing him on the weekends you never said you would. Which is good coz obviously you're seeing your kid when you don't 'have' to but the ex is probably getting mixed signals and expecting you to see him.

Like others said, sort it out with her.

Personally i think it's reasonable for you to make plans for yourself in your own time and it's not like it's an emergency and she has to rely on you to have him.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ok need to some thing up when I have him I pick him up on Friday night at 6 take him back Sunday night at 5 if don't pick him up Fri I get him sat morning at 9 the other weekends is see him for a few hours on the sat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also, your son might be expecting to see you as well seeing as he is used to this arrangement too, so he might have made a fuss or got upset and this might be why your ex is stressing and having a go at you.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Ok need to some thing up when I have him I pick him up on Friday night at 6 take him back Sunday night at 5 if don't pick him up Fri I get him sat morning at 9 the other weekends is see him for a few hours on the sat"

So why not plan your night out for the weekend he doesnt sleep over instead of the one that does?

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

what match is it ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never turn down the chance to be with your kids as time passes too quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Problem is you're usually seeing him on the weekends you never said you would. Which is good coz obviously you're seeing your kid when you don't 'have' to but the ex is probably getting mixed signals and expecting you to see him.

Like others said, sort it out with her.

Personally i think it's reasonable for you to make plans for yourself in your own time and it's not like it's an emergency and she has to rely on you to have him."

I'm inclined to agree with this. if you stick to agreed times you avoid this exact situation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Curvy this is my weekend not to have him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only you can decide if you're in the wrong.

This is not really the place to ask.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Also, your son might be expecting to see you as well seeing as he is used to this arrangement too, so he might have made a fuss or got upset and this might be why your ex is stressing and having a go at you."

Could be as simple as this if my twins dad doesnt turn up when hes supposed to they get terribly upset its heartbreaking, holding your child while they cry themselves to sleep over broken promises is infescribedly hard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Problem is you're usually seeing him on the weekends you never said you would. Which is good coz obviously you're seeing your kid when you don't 'have' to but the ex is probably getting mixed signals and expecting you to see him.

Like others said, sort it out with her.

Personally i think it's reasonable for you to make plans for yourself in your own time and it's not like it's an emergency and she has to rely on you to have him."

wise words, gently spoken

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I always tell him if I'm coming or not so he don't get upset

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Curvy this is my weekend not to have him"

So if the pub is tonight on the weekend you only visit him, why have you not seen in for a few hours in the day as previously arranged? surely there was time to pop home and freshen up afterwards before hitting the pub

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

[Removed by poster at 05/04/15 19:46:34]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's your decision. If conscience says you've seen enough of them to allow yourself a night off then do it, if not then the decision's a no brainer

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm not the perfect dad nobody is but have never let him down and never intend to start

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire


"I always tell him if I'm coming or not so he don't get upset"

I don't see the problem as long as you told your son you will do something nice with HIM next time you see him

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Curvy this is my weekend not to have him"

Right, sorry this wasn't clear to me from your opening thread. If this isn't your weekend to have hun then your quite entitled to do whatever the hell you like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm confused?? Why can't you have him for a few hrs anyway?? A few beers & football isn't going to take the whole day

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Obviously any extra time you spend with him is a bonus.. But you aee entitled to some time to yourself as im sure she gets when he's at yours.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

It's not agreed to have him the Friday night but I do most of the time to give her a break

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get my children every other weekend from Friday to Sunday (or Monday mornings during the summer school term) and half of school holidays, and I had a ling and hard legal battle to get that. Picked them up on Friday and have them through to this coming Friday.

Their mother and I live 40 miles apart, so it isn't entirely practical to see them during the week after school, otherwise I would see more of them.

Some might argue that you are rather fortunate that you and your ex are able to be mature enough to be able to make your own arrangements rather than involving solicitors and the courts

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

even if its not your weekend to see your child a little more often would be worth it

to choose your life and not the extra time with your child is your choice at the end of it

if the boot was on the other foot and you did not get to see them i wonder how you would react to that

please remember you only get one shot as they grow up seeing them do this is worth more than you can think of

if you get extra time with your child bloody enjoy it is my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not the perfect dad nobody is but have never let him down and never intend to start"

Just seen your post on the pre-eclampsia. I know what you went through.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

We do stuff every time bloody he'll he takes me roller skating lol

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire


"We do stuff every time bloody he'll he takes me roller skating lol"

then don't feel guilty you sound like a caring dad

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Additive yes it was very hard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always tell him if I'm coming or not so he don't get upset"

Ok was just a thought, i know my kids dad isn't that great and used to upset my kids by saying he'd turn up and he didn't, i forget some dads actually are considerate. I have kids with two exes and the other is ok but we're constantly in touch and flexible about a lot of things.

Don't worry too much. I know that when you split up things can't always go your way when it comes to your kids and you often have to do things you don't want to when you don't want or wait for the things you do want and trying to have a life around your kids and exes can be difficult, and it's not always as black and white as people make out.

But yeah sort something with the ex soon to make sure this stuff doesn't cause problems between you both. Is always best to be on good terms with an ex partner when kids are involved.

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

how old is he ...could he go with you ?

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I always tell him if I'm coming or not so he don't get upset"

You see my twins dad always tells them himself too they still end up crying in my arms over it after hes gone, problem is hes not there to see it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If your son knows the days he sees you, and has lots of reasurance of that, and something nice planned, of course you should have your time.

It is the fathers that let them down and mess them around that are a problem.

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Problem is you're usually seeing him on the weekends you never said you would. Which is good coz obviously you're seeing your kid when you don't 'have' to but the ex is probably getting mixed signals and expecting you to see him.

Like others said, sort it out with her.

Personally i think it's reasonable for you to make plans for yourself in your own time and it's not like it's an emergency and she has to rely on you to have him."

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Freelove I'm sure being the only 7yr old with 5 30 to 40 yr old in a pub is gonna look good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Also, your son might be expecting to see you as well seeing as he is used to this arrangement too, so he might have made a fuss or got upset and this might be why your ex is stressing and having a go at you."

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I'm confused?? Why can't you have him for a few hrs anyway?? A few beers & football isn't going to take the whole day"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

My ex knows I have never let him down so don't know the reason why she being like this I have tried talking to her but won't reply to my texts or calls and if she does its nasty comments and I won't put myself down to her level

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My ex knows I have never let him down so don't know the reason why she being like this I have tried talking to her but won't reply to my texts or calls and if she does its nasty comments and I won't put myself down to her level"

Perhaps she had plans and is pissed off she can't do that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As she's not here to defend herself, reinforces my stance that it's something to discuss between the two of you. We're only getting your side of the story.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"My ex knows I have never let him down so don't know the reason why she being like this I have tried talking to her but won't reply to my texts or calls and if she does its nasty comments and I won't put myself down to her level"

The point ive been trying to make is you think your sons ok with it you dont actually know wjat goes on behind those closed doors once youve left. Shes maybe trying to protect your feelings by not telling you how upset he gets over it, so then the protective mother in her lashes out at the person hurting a baby instead.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My ex knows I have never let him down so don't know the reason why she being like this I have tried talking to her but won't reply to my texts or calls and if she does its nasty comments and I won't put myself down to her level"

Like i i said before, it's what she expected because it seems to be what always happens. So she's upset, and probably being a bit manipulative to get her own way.

But yeah leave sorting out with her until she's calmed down. You'll have to judge when that is coz i don't know her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I understand she not here to defend herself the thing is I won't sit here and slag her of cause she does a good job with him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The point ive been trying to make is you think your sons ok with it you dont actually know wjat goes on behind those closed doors once youve left. Shes maybe trying to protect your feelings by not telling you how upset he gets over it, so then the protective mother in her lashes out at the person hurting a baby instead. "

Or this.^^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok not going to make any judgment on the rights or wrongs of your question.

As long as the time you do spend with him he knows how important he is to you, tell him you love him.

If you not going to see him this weekend maybe a chat on the phone, say hi etc.

Don't let your ex get between you and the same with you.

Kids are alot tougher than we give them credit for.

And as long as he knows both parents love him and he is taught right and wrong and given love. Then the amount you see him isn't as important as the quality of the time you do spend.

However it's difficult for everyone in situations like this and it's usually the kids who end up being used as emotional pawns.

What's done is done now.

I'm am sure he knows that you love him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The thing is, your child won't always be 7 , he'll be a teenager before you know it and more interested in his mates ...Make sure you make the effort while he wants you around ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I can understand if I am a father that does not give a shit about my kids but that is far from it

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"We do stuff every time bloody he'll he takes me roller skating lol

then don't feel guilty you sound like a caring dad "

You this can be a good or bad thing, the bonding time aspect is great but if its seen as putting your hand in your pocket to do somethimg special to make up for not seeing them, it isnt love its only buying love, and likely to breed resentment firther down the line

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Jools I ring him every other day or he rings me when he wants

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire


"We do stuff every time bloody he'll he takes me roller skating lol

then don't feel guilty you sound like a caring dad

You this can be a good or bad thing, the bonding time aspect is great but if its seen as putting your hand in your pocket to do somethimg special to make up for not seeing them, it isnt love its only buying love, and likely to breed resentment firther down the line "

ANY kid can be bribed lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Curvy sometimes we do stuff that don't cost anything like the park playing football or countryside walks it's not all about money and he knows that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A man not wanting to take his son to a sporting event is just so bad! Man up and get the lad to the footy it is was what you were born to do

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Curvy sometimes we do stuff that don't cost anything like the park playing football or countryside walks it's not all about money and he knows that"

You don't have to justify what you do with your son to anyone on here just to appease them and whatever issues or experiences they have with own exes

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands

Child

Beer with the lads

Child

Beer with the lads

Child

Beer with the lads

Mmmmm

Saying nowt me!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A man not wanting to take his son to a sporting event is just so bad! Man up and get the lad to the footy it is was what you were born to do "
first game this season he not going with me

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Curvy sometimes we do stuff that don't cost anything like the park playing football or countryside walks it's not all about money and he knows that"

Well thats good. Im not tryimg to be a bitch yo you im just tryimg yo.open your mind to other ideas you may not have considered.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I can understand if I am a father that does not give a shit about my kids but that is far from it"

My ex is a useless prick that don't see his son on the days he should let alone any extra. He's meant to have him one day out of 6 that's due to his shift patten .. If he wants him overnighr then that's fine and he brings him back next day.

He's seen him for 2 hours in total over the last 4 weeks. Was meant to have him tomorrow just for the day. Cancelled. Now he's off on holiday for a fortnight on Saturday. So it'll be 6 weeks and a grand total of 2 hours..

Sounds like you see your son for the time agreed and extras when you can. You ring each other often for a chat inbetween. If my ex did half of what you did my lad would be a lucky kid.

Don't feel bad about one weekend to yourself!!!

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By *ove bi guysWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Curvy sometimes we do stuff that don't cost anything like the park playing football or countryside walks it's not all about money and he knows that

You don't have to justify what you do with your son to anyone on here just to appease them and whatever issues or experiences they have with own exes

"

You have decided now so enjoy your day and maybe plan to have son for may bank holiday so ex can plan a day too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give the guy some slack. If it not his actual weekend to have his son then I see no problem with it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Good luck with whatever you decide

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

my ex had another family and never bothered with my daughter but now shes a mum and she wont even let him see her or her son

you are being a good dad so don't worry

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin "

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Not judging

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

Sensible question - ridiculous place to ask it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Not judging

"

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin "

Good since thats the case

Out of curiosity you did never answer if you could have had time to see him before the match kicked off and the drinking commenced.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can understand if I am a father that does not give a shit about my kids but that is far from it

My ex is a useless prick that don't see his son on the days he should let alone any extra. He's meant to have him one day out of 6 that's due to his shift patten .. If he wants him overnighr then that's fine and he brings him back next day.

He's seen him for 2 hours in total over the last 4 weeks. Was meant to have him tomorrow just for the day. Cancelled. Now he's off on holiday for a fortnight on Saturday. So it'll be 6 weeks and a grand total of 2 hours..

Sounds like you see your son for the time agreed and extras when you can. You ring each other often for a chat inbetween. If my ex did half of what you did my lad would be a lucky kid.

Don't feel bad about one weekend to yourself!!!"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change "
The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ex has two daughters even though we split I still get them birthday presents and stuff I won't treat th any different cause we have split cause I brought them up fro 2yr old and 4 yr old they are 11 and 14 now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could always have a listen to Harry Chapin's "Cats In The Cradle" and see if it influences you at all.

Time flies and all that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ex has two daughters even though we split I still get them birthday presents and stuff I won't treat th any different cause we have split cause I brought them up fro 2yr old and 4 yr old they are 11 and 14 now"

Stop justifying yourself. We don't need to know any of this.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment "

Not sure what a recreational sex environment has to do with anything.

If the guy wants one weekend to himself when he does more than a lot of dead beat loser dads so he can go out and have a few beers at a match with his mates then I really don't see the problem.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment "
who put you on ya high horse

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Not judging

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother. "

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Ex has two daughters even though we split I still get them birthday presents and stuff I won't treat th any different cause we have split cause I brought them up fro 2yr old and 4 yr old they are 11 and 14 now

Stop justifying yourself. We don't need to know any of this. "

You're right but it would appear that some people think that having kids means that you should never have a minute to yourself. Lol. Seems like he is a decent caring guy to me.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Not judging

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer "

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

Good since thats the case

Out of curiosity you did never answer if you could have had time to see him before the match kicked off and the drinking commenced. "
sorry I would of I said that but got told not to bother

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

you can have kids and a life its all about balancing things

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment

Not sure what a recreational sex environment has to do with anything.

If the guy wants one weekend to himself when he does more than a lot of dead beat loser dads so he can go out and have a few beers at a match with his mates then I really don't see the problem. "
ok a site that is not for WellCare advice

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment

Not sure what a recreational sex environment has to do with anything.

If the guy wants one weekend to himself when he does more than a lot of dead beat loser dads so he can go out and have a few beers at a match with his mates then I really don't see the problem. ok a site that is not for WellCare advice"

It's the lounge. People can ask for advice on anything. I've felt it helpful before getting opinions from strangers rather than friends/relatives who can't always be impartial

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ex has two daughters even though we split I still get them birthday presents and stuff I won't treat th any different cause we have split cause I brought them up fro 2yr old and 4 yr old they are 11 and 14 now

Stop justifying yourself. We don't need to know any of this.

You're right but it would appear that some people think that having kids means that you should never have a minute to yourself. Lol. Seems like he is a decent caring guy to me. "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment

Not sure what a recreational sex environment has to do with anything.

If the guy wants one weekend to himself when he does more than a lot of dead beat loser dads so he can go out and have a few beers at a match with his mates then I really don't see the problem. ok a site that is not for WellCare advice

It's the lounge. People can ask for advice on anything. I've felt it helpful before getting opinions from strangers rather than friends/relatives who can't always be impartial "

Thanks this is why I asked here cause our friends won't take sides that to me is good friends not ones that say one thing to one and another thing to the other

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

Good since thats the case

Out of curiosity you did never answer if you could have had time to see him before the match kicked off and the drinking commenced. sorry I would of I said that but got told not to bother "

Fair enough, obvious conclusion is that the answer is yes you could have but chose not to. Now you are living with the consequences of that choice.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment

Not sure what a recreational sex environment has to do with anything.

If the guy wants one weekend to himself when he does more than a lot of dead beat loser dads so he can go out and have a few beers at a match with his mates then I really don't see the problem. ok a site that is not for WellCare advice

It's the lounge. People can ask for advice on anything. I've felt it helpful before getting opinions from strangers rather than friends/relatives who can't always be impartial "

The day I take advice from the Fabs Forums is the day satan ice-skates to work.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Not judging

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter."

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Not judging

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

"

If my ex took my lad to spend time with him then palmed him off on a babysitter Id be fuming. Either have him and be there or don't have him.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

"

I see him every weekend even if he don't stay at mine this is the first weekend in about 3 months I have not seen him

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke"

Trust me a lot arent pitying him, hes had his fair share of backlash from people that see things from your point of _iew

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke"

Who mentioned a bird? He's off out with some mates to watch the footie on a day he doesn't normally even see his son. And trust me I have an ex and a son and know exactly what it's like to have a tosser with no thought for anyone but himself. And that's not this guy!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke

Who mentioned a bird? He's off out with some mates to watch the footie on a day he doesn't normally even see his son. And trust me I have an ex and a son and know exactly what it's like to have a tosser with no thought for anyone but himself. And that's not this guy! "

He's advertising for a meet

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke

Who mentioned a bird? He's off out with some mates to watch the footie on a day he doesn't normally even see his son. And trust me I have an ex and a son and know exactly what it's like to have a tosser with no thought for anyone but himself. And that's not this guy! "

I think the bird comment was in reference to the OPs status looking for a meet.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

I see him every weekend even if he don't stay at mine this is the first weekend in about 3 months I have not seen him"

I'm sure you do a great job

Then she's being unreasonable

But I used to go to a pub where I could take mine

Just saying

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke"

It's not about pity far from it

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke

Who mentioned a bird? He's off out with some mates to watch the footie on a day he doesn't normally even see his son. And trust me I have an ex and a son and know exactly what it's like to have a tosser with no thought for anyone but himself. And that's not this guy!

He's advertising for a meet"

On his weekend off from having his son

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm just feeling pissed off cause I chose to do something for myself for a change The second your son and or daughter(s) were born you ceased to be the most important thing in your life. Their well being and happiness is your main aim in life and you need to man up and get a grip! Take the lad to the game tell him how much you love him and rejoice in the fact that you can. If you don't agree with what I say then don't post on a forum in a recreational sex environment

Not sure what a recreational sex environment has to do with anything.

If the guy wants one weekend to himself when he does more than a lot of dead beat loser dads so he can go out and have a few beers at a match with his mates then I really don't see the problem. ok a site that is not for WellCare advice

It's the lounge. People can ask for advice on anything. I've felt it helpful before getting opinions from strangers rather than friends/relatives who can't always be impartial "
indeed but a conscience is far better guide than a recreational sex site!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Is this guy for real?

Why is ebeyine pitying him?

There is a 7 year old boy who probably wants to see his dad and due to the fact he ain't seen him for a week or so and he's dad is too busy going to the pub for a beer and trying to get his leg over with a bird he's never met.

Think of all these people that ain't fortunate enough to be able to have kids and then there's this bloke

Who mentioned a bird? He's off out with some mates to watch the footie on a day he doesn't normally even see his son. And trust me I have an ex and a son and know exactly what it's like to have a tosser with no thought for anyone but himself. And that's not this guy!

He's advertising for a meet"

Didn't see that but so what if he is.. He's not got his son. Is he meant to be celibate as well as not have any free time??

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

I see him every weekend even if he don't stay at mine this is the first weekend in about 3 months I have not seen him

I'm sure you do a great job

Then she's being unreasonable

But I used to go to a pub where I could take mine

Just saying

"
I did say to ex I would see him beforehand but she said don't bother

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

I see him every weekend even if he don't stay at mine this is the first weekend in about 3 months I have not seen him

I'm sure you do a great job

Then she's being unreasonable

But I used to go to a pub where I could take mine

Just saying

I did say to ex I would see him beforehand but she said don't bother "

Then tell her to grow up xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

I see him every weekend even if he don't stay at mine this is the first weekend in about 3 months I have not seen him

I'm sure you do a great job

Then she's being unreasonable

But I used to go to a pub where I could take mine

Just saying

I did say to ex I would see him beforehand but she said don't bother "

You said that further up the thread but people are choosing to ignore it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes I have advertised for a meet but this is nothing to do with not having my son cause he with ex and her family so what am I to do play chess

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I know when I posted this I was gonna get two sides but I can take it on the chin

They have babysitters in Worcester

Wonderful things

Don't they have those up north?

Just asking

Why does he need a baby sitter? The lads with his mother.

He'd could do both!

See his child

Go out for a beer

Still not sure what that's got to do with a baby sitter.

Doh

He could've get a babysitter for while he's out with his friends

And see him when he returns and before he goes out

I totally get it that it's not his turn to see him

But he sees him 2 weekends a month

Hardly the lions share

No offence meant whatsoever

Just saying

I see him every weekend even if he don't stay at mine this is the first weekend in about 3 months I have not seen him

I'm sure you do a great job

Then she's being unreasonable

But I used to go to a pub where I could take mine

Just saying

I did say to ex I would see him beforehand but she said don't bother

You said that further up the thread but people are choosing to ignore it. "

No

I missed it

You cannot ignore what you've not seen

Apologies to OP

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"Yes I have advertised for a meet but this is nothing to do with not having my son cause he with ex and her family so what am I to do play chess"

Lol

I can do both

Hope you find a meet

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

So glad youve said this now. Youve redeemed yourself as you did choose to do both things see him and have time for you, but she prevented you from seeing him (thats wrong of her).

Before this you looked to many like a guy that chose to put footy, beer and sex before even an hour with his child

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Yes I have advertised for a meet but this is nothing to do with not having my son cause he with ex and her family so what am I to do play chess"

I wouldn't listen to anybody on here. Only you can decide if you are a good father and have time with your son. If it's not your weekend to see him then go out. Sometimes kids are used as weapons in situations.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Yes I have advertised for a meet but this is nothing to do with not having my son cause he with ex and her family so what am I to do play chess"

Kudos to you op for keeping your head on this thread as IMHO you've been perfectly reasonable in what you've done. And that's from a single mum of a young boy. Keep it up. And remember don't treat yourself to a day out until at least October now

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself"

Firstly, without knowing the while story, I think both parents should put the need of their children before their own, but that also means having some boundaries and agreements in place.

If it is not your weekend to have him then that is your weekend to do as YOU please without feeling guilty. The same should apply when it is his mum's time off.

If you are being slagged off for not complying with his mum's demands in time your children will realise who is the more reasonable parent. But remember your child will always love both parents and does not like being put in the middle.

Hope this helps.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I personally wouldn't take a 7 year old into a pub especially if there is a football match. Wacky warehouse, family type pubs possibly but not other types of pubs. I could think of better places to take a 7 year old rather than to a pub...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself

Firstly, without knowing the while story, I think both parents should put the need of their children before their own, but that also means having some boundaries and agreements in place.

If it is not your weekend to have him then that is your weekend to do as YOU please without feeling guilty. The same should apply when it is his mum's time off.

If you are being slagged off for not complying with his mum's demands in time your children will realise who is the more reasonable parent. But remember your child will always love both parents and does not like being put in the middle.

Hope this helps.

"

I would never put my child in the middle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself

Firstly, without knowing the while story, I think both parents should put the need of their children before their own, but that also means having some boundaries and agreements in place.

If it is not your weekend to have him then that is your weekend to do as YOU please without feeling guilty. The same should apply when it is his mum's time off.

If you are being slagged off for not complying with his mum's demands in time your children will realise who is the more reasonable parent. But remember your child will always love both parents and does not like being put in the middle.

Hope this helps.

I would never put my child in the middle "
I did not imply you were - I was just talking in general that often children feel they are caught up in the middle even if parents are not deliberately doing that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad"

Eh?

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands


"I personally wouldn't take a 7 year old into a pub especially if there is a football match. Wacky warehouse, family type pubs possibly but not other types of pubs. I could think of better places to take a 7 year old rather than to a pub..."

I've got 3 children

a teacher

A nurse

And a beautician with her own business

All healthy

Moderate drinkers

Non smoking

Suffice to say it did them zero harm

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad"

Hes admitted he tried to see him today so he could do both as per their arrangements but was denied access by his ex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad"

Be quiet if you're not gonna contribute anything of value

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself

Firstly, without knowing the while story, I think both parents should put the need of their children before their own, but that also means having some boundaries and agreements in place.

If it is not your weekend to have him then that is your weekend to do as YOU please without feeling guilty. The same should apply when it is his mum's time off.

If you are being slagged off for not complying with his mum's demands in time your children will realise who is the more reasonable parent. But remember your child will always love both parents and does not like being put in the middle.

Hope this helps.

I would never put my child in the middle I did not imply you were - I was just talking in general that often children feel they are caught up in the middle even if parents are not deliberately doing that. "

I know you weren't

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad

Be quiet if you're not gonna contribute anything of value"

Lmao.. Post of the day

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad

Be quiet if you're not gonna contribute anything of value"

Welcome to the internet. You must be new.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yes I have advertised for a meet but this is nothing to do with not having my son cause he with ex and her family so what am I to do play chess

Kudos to you op for keeping your head on this thread as IMHO you've been perfectly reasonable in what you've done. And that's from a single mum of a young boy. Keep it up. And remember don't treat yourself to a day out until at least October now "

Thank you like I said I can take the good with the bad x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad

Be quiet if you're not gonna contribute anything of value

Welcome to the internet. You must be new."

Erm........not quite

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"I personally wouldn't take a 7 year old into a pub especially if there is a football match. Wacky warehouse, family type pubs possibly but not other types of pubs. I could think of better places to take a 7 year old rather than to a pub...

I've got 3 children

a teacher

A nurse

And a beautician with her own business

All healthy

Moderate drinkers

Non smoking

Suffice to say it did them zero harm

"

Well that's great I've just seen the opposite case to yours on so many occasions. We all have different ways in certain things but I'm happy your kids turned out ok...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad

Be quiet if you're not gonna contribute anything of value

Lmao.. Post of the day "

I thanks you, I'll be here all week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't judge you, OP, as I have never had ankle biters. But since you were asking for comments, I would say that you are selfish, Just my uninformed _iew.

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By *-4pleasureCouple
over a year ago

Belfast


"I have my 7yr old son every other weekend sometimes both Fri and Sat night sometimes just the sat night. On most occasions the weekends I don't have him I normally see him for 2 to 3 hours on the sat. This weekend it's not my turn to have I choose not to see him this weekend to make other plans for me . Tomorrow I have made plans to go for a few beers and to the football. My ex is slagging me of because I won't take him with me and that I have not seen him this weekend am I in the wrong or am I not allowed to have some time to myself"

If you have to ask.....nah I'm not gonna say what I really think .....

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"Disgraceful.

And not just the OP

All you turncoats are just as bad

Be quiet if you're not gonna contribute anything of value

Lmao.. Post of the day

I thanks you, I'll be here all week "

Jolly good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You see your son every OTHER weekend and a couple of hours ONE day a week. Your ex is a selfish cow expecting you to see your kid EVERY week.

Enjoy your beer...they'll get over it.

"

Are you serious it's a big thing for a father to see his sun your free all week whats the big deal should be glad to see him at the weekend couple of you numbers need to get your priorities in line

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent


"You see your son every OTHER weekend and a couple of hours ONE day a week. Your ex is a selfish cow expecting you to see your kid EVERY week.

Enjoy your beer...they'll get over it.

Are you serious it's a big thing for a father to see his sun your free all week whats the big deal should be glad to see him at the weekend couple of you numbers need to get your priorities in line"

Not free all week. Works 12 hour night shifts as said further up.,

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I can't judge you, OP, as I have never had ankle biters. But since you were asking for comments, I would say that you are selfish, Just my uninformed _iew."
selfish for having one weekend off in about 3 months to have time to myself plus tried to arrange to see him before hand with no avail

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just take your son to the match! It's right and proper

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago


"I can't judge you, OP, as I have never had ankle biters. But since you were asking for comments, I would say that you are selfish, Just my uninformed _iew. selfish for having one weekend off in about 3 months to have time to myself plus tried to arrange to see him before hand with no avail"

Don't bite nor justify

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"I can't judge you, OP, as I have never had ankle biters. But since you were asking for comments, I would say that you are selfish, Just my uninformed _iew. selfish for having one weekend off in about 3 months to have time to myself plus tried to arrange to see him before hand with no avail"

Seriously stop justifying youself to a bunch of people who is likely to have any impact on your life apart from a few words on a internet site. Only YOU can decide if you done the right thing.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"I can't judge you, OP, as I have never had ankle biters. But since you were asking for comments, I would say that you are selfish, Just my uninformed _iew. selfish for having one weekend off in about 3 months to have time to myself plus tried to arrange to see him before hand with no avail

Seriously stop justifying youself to a bunch of people who is likely to have any impact on your life apart from a few words on a internet site. Only YOU can decide if you done the right thing. "

Unlikely not likely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have read the thread but may of missed it, but, why has she asked you to have your son when it's not 'your turn'? Is she unwell, work emergency? ect......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You will have plenty of time to ponder that one when your son grows up knowing his Dad chose footy and beer over seeing him. He won't want to know you maybe.

Lots of Dads would kill for the chances you have. Don't waste a second. He will be an adult before you know it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have read the thread but may of missed it, but, why has she asked you to have your son when it's not 'your turn'? Is she unwell, work emergency? ect......"

I read the OP as having a full weekend in every two, and then in between when he doesn't have him, he still has him for 2-3 hours on a Saturday. Yet this time around, he's decided not to have those 2-3 hours 'cos he wants "time to himself".

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have read the thread but may of missed it, but, why has she asked you to have your son when it's not 'your turn'? Is she unwell, work emergency? ect......"
she never asked me to have him I put a status on fb if any my mates up for a few beers and the footy an hour later she text me asking could if I could take him I had already made plans with mates so I said I would have him before before I go and was told not to bother

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then I don't understand why you can't take him to the footy, isn't that what lads and dads do, season tickets and all that? It doesn't have to be a full on session with your mates! A quick drink before and after, and a bag of chips on the way home. It's what kids memories of their childhood should be made of.

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By *omaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

My kids come before any thing else but at the same time you have a life to live too and can't be at the Beck and call of you're ex.

It's a thing only you can decide.

Make it up to the child next time you see him/her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

He does come first I see him every weekend in what ever capacity if staying at mine for the weekend or a few hours when he don't I would see him more if I could but like said by others I do have to have a life aswell. Ex fails to see I do things for her when see wants to do things like next month she is going to a concert on a Thurs night I have booked the night off work so she can go so I can have him

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I am not sure why people are saying this isn't the place to ask, we have had many threads before now venting about male ex's and they didn't get the same comments.

To your OP...it sounds like you are a dad who spends time with his kid, lots don't bother, at least you do. If you had plans and it wasn't an emergency to see your child then I don't see a problem with saying maybe another day, I wouldn't take him with you in an adult environment with adults only for company though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP.

Seriously. ..STOP justifying yourself to a bunch of strangers on a forum.

Judgemental strangers (at best)...

.. and I say that with my tongue firmly in cheek.

Seriously. . Some of the comments on this thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Must state I can't see him during the week as I work 12 hour shifts on nights I would see him everyday if I could"

Yet you chose not to???

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire


"OP.

Seriously. ..STOP justifying yourself to a bunch of strangers on a forum.

Judgemental strangers (at best)...

.. and I say that with my tongue firmly in cheek.

Seriously. . Some of the comments on this thread. "

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"OP.

Seriously. ..STOP justifying yourself to a bunch of strangers on a forum.

Judgemental strangers (at best)...

.. and I say that with my tongue firmly in cheek.

Seriously. . Some of the comments on this thread. "

Your reasonable attitude and sense have no place round here.

LYNCH HIM!

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Wouldnt you rather see your child than go out with your friends.. easter is surely a family time for kids and grandparents .. easter eggs and treats. you have all the time in the world to go out drinking when he is at school

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OP.

Seriously. ..STOP justifying yourself to a bunch of strangers on a forum.

Judgemental strangers (at best)...

.. and I say that with my tongue firmly in cheek.

Seriously. . Some of the comments on this thread.

Your reasonable attitude and sense have no place round here.

LYNCH HIM!"

I know. Totally right!

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Wouldnt you rather see your child than go out with your friends.. easter is surely a family time for kids and grandparents .. easter eggs and treats. you have all the time in the world to go out drinking when he is at school

"

It's not his weekend to see his son

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Must state I can't see him during the week as I work 12 hour shifts on nights I would see him everyday if I could

Yet you chose not to???"
as stated plans were made before I was asked to take him and said I would have him before I went I would of took him but a 7yr in a pub full of men and alcohol is not a good environment for him to be in

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Must state I can't see him during the week as I work 12 hour shifts on nights I would see him everyday if I could

Yet you chose not to??? as stated plans were made before I was asked to take him and said I would have him before I went I would of took him but a 7yr in a pub full of men and alcohol is not a good environment for him to be in"

As much as you tried to to both things which is good. I know even if id made plans already, if i got offered an extra night with my child id cancel on the friends and have regularly in the past.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Oh to have a halo like all the utterly perfect people in this thread

Don't all go falling off your perfect pedestals will you,you may break those halos

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Must state I can't see him during the week as I work 12 hour shifts on nights I would see him everyday if I could

Yet you chose not to??? as stated plans were made before I was asked to take him and said I would have him before I went I would of took him but a 7yr in a pub full of men and alcohol is not a good environment for him to be in"

Agree.

Hope you had a good day. Don't let the grumps on here get you down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have an opinion I am reliably informed?

The OP should take his boy to the match Man up and enjoy the day. Read the original post

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"Oh to have a halo like all the utterly perfect people in this thread

Don't all go falling off your perfect pedestals will you,you may break those halos "

Im far from perfect its just when the choice is there I choose my girls, always will, If that in your opinion means im up on a pedastal then I quite like the _iew from up here. Once their tucked up for the night a good soak in the bath is adequate me time for me. Each to their own, afterall

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a single mum whos dad dont bother bout his kids i think your doing a grand job .

You have your son even on weekends ment for you even if its only for a few hrs . Some fathers on here and in real world would be better at taking some of your parenting skills and using them rather than slagging you off .

I as a single parent would be a liar if i said i didnt need time away from my lot never mind them from me ....

Take your day enjoy it and dont feel guilty about it either .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can you imagine the increase in a football teams match day attendance if that Jamaican feller the other day had to take all of his kids?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I would ditch the beers and football and spend time with the boy. Beer and football will always be there another time - your son may not be, especially if your ex uses this occasion, and others, to turn him against you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Must state I can't see him during the week as I work 12 hour shifts on nights I would see him everyday if I could

Yet you chose not to??? as stated plans were made before I was asked to take him and said I would have him before I went I would of took him but a 7yr in a pub full of men and alcohol is not a good environment for him to be in

Agree.

Hope you had a good day. Don't let the grumps on here get you down. "

They won't get me down I am stronger than that. Everyone has their opinions and I won't slag anyone for what they may see is a negative comment towards me cause it's all about respect to others and their opinions we all don't agree on things if we did the world would be a boring place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And this is why I have no kids.

I know the score with this shit.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn


"As a single mum whos dad dont bother bout his kids i think your doing a grand job .

You have your son even on weekends ment for you even if its only for a few hrs . Some fathers on here and in real world would be better at taking some of your parenting skills and using them rather than slagging you off .

I as a single parent would be a liar if i said i didnt need time away from my lot never mind them from me ....

Take your day enjoy it and dont feel guilty about it either ..... "

I agree.

I have also now have the inevitable happen that the eldest doesn't want anything to do with his dad because of how he has been with his son.

My one weekend a month has now become not visiting him at all.

Keep doing what you are doing OP

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