FabSwingers.com forum: Fab Care Home

By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

A few of us have reserved spaces in the Fab Care Home, a retirement complex for us swingers as we age not so graciously.

Complete with dungeon and a regular visiting clientele, similar to the Nanna Love show.

What other facilities should we provide and who's booking a space?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wide patio doors to each and every room (ground floor rooms only) so that the hearse can be backed in as needed.

H & S rule No 187621 : Reduce carrying whenever possible.

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

Definitely a wet room

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Meeee.. I could be one of the first guests... I'd like topless nurses in suspenders please..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hot young male physio for our arthritic limbs....

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

For the love of God don't let any of the old fuckers fuck anyone!! Apparently old people having sex is a fuck too far for some on here lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jacuzzi with a gentle ramp/slope fir entry and exit....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

May I have one of those chairs that raises me onto my feet please? I have dodgy knees.

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By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

All staff will be dressed, a la sexy nurse gear, of course.

And for the others, hung studs in minimal gear. Bed baths will be compulsory when a little tired or incapacitated, alongside some sexual pleasuring.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Definitely a wet room "

Every room is a wet room if you wee yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As long as someone can reapply my lippy and pluck my chin hairs I'll be happy

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

"Definitely a wet room

Every room is a wet room if you wee yourself.

I was thinking the same lol

fab idea this care home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex swings to take pressure of those sore joints lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can the nurses come round and administer a little oily hanjob for the gents or a slip of the finger for the ladies just prior to sleep and lights out as a nightcap?

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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago

Cambridge

Some sex swings might be needed. I've heard of bath lifts, but we might need some hot tub lifts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

converted baby bouncers to do the upward thrusting for us aging blokes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Definitely a wet room "

I think every room would be a wet room once incontinence sets in!!

suggest we all learn to love water sports by the time we hit our seventies - it'll save a lot of time and aggravation!!

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By *oconut2Woman
over a year ago

Nether regions of the back of beyond

Book me a room please

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By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Unlike some rest homes where clients are kept sedated, the typical medication provided may be viagra for some of the resident guys.

There must be a definite call for this service, so I'm saving up now.

So, facilities include dungeon, wet room, sex swings - bought to your room on demand, as well as group shag areas, so far.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Cock splints

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"converted baby bouncers to do the upward thrusting for us aging blokes

Now THAT'S an idea! Suggest you patent it before some other bugger steals it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A moist hoist? Perhaps

Ohhh teeth out parties! Yey gummy blowie's, line up guys!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Sex swings to take pressure of those sore joints lol"

They may need to be hydraulic - I have trouble getting into to them now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"converted baby bouncers to do the upward thrusting for us aging blokes

"
(c) YeOldeWitchDoc's Brain Farts 2015 All Rights Reserved

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sex swings to take pressure of those sore joints lol

They may need to be hydraulic - I have trouble getting into to them now.

Pmsl it's ok you can use the moist hoist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"converted baby bouncers to do the upward thrusting for us aging blokes

Now THAT'S an idea! Suggest you patent it before some other bugger steals it!

"
Done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Actually I think a swinging retirement village with an incorporated nursing home is an effing brilliant idea!! No age restrictions - you could go to live there as soon as your kids leave home! A purpose built town like Milton Keynes - but a darned site more fun! I'm gonna start saving up now in case it happens!!

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By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

"Actually I think a swinging retirement village with an incorporated nursing home is an effing brilliant idea!! No age restrictions - you could go to live there as soon as your kids leave home! A purpose built town like Milton Keynes - but a darned site more fun! I'm gonna start saving up now in case it happens!!

I've been thinking this for a while too, and spoke about in a forum post a while ago. I hope that we stay in Europe, as that could keep a stream of young fit care assistants, or varying nationalities, to help keep interest up, possibly as we learn some new languages.

In winter, we'd have some space in our mediterranean complex, so that we could enjoy the warmth, and anyone with aches and pains can get some relief.

No nosy neighbours, no trouble with profiles who can't accom, as we'd all have time share options on fuck rooms, if we didn't want to shag in our own spaces.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Sex swings to take pressure of those sore joints lol

They may need to be hydraulic - I have trouble getting into to them now.

Pmsl it's ok you can use the moist hoist

Can I have a dry one please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Definitely a wet room

Every room is a wet room if you wee yourself.

Mmmmmm

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I need a codger rogerer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Penis pumps that work at the push of a button, kind of modified BP monitors. In fact they could take your BP at the same time. Can't be doing with squeezing the bulb with arthritic hands.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In winter, we'd have some space in our mediterranean complex, so that we could enjoy the warmth, and anyone with aches and pains can get some relief.

No nosy neighbours, no trouble with profiles who can't accom, as we'd all have time share options on fuck rooms, if we didn't want to shag in our own spaces."

Well if it ever happens I'll definitely be there!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gummy blow jobs galore !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sex swings to take pressure of those sore joints lol

They may need to be hydraulic - I have trouble getting into to them now.

Pmsl it's ok you can use the moist hoist

Can I have a dry one please.

For goodness sake, your so fussy.. ok I'll wipe, before alighting what's a little foggie juice between freinds..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Self installing condoms and cock rings, perhaps remote controlled robots could do this

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Self installing condoms and cock rings, perhaps remote controlled robots could do this

If you go down the robot route then you might as well install the fucking machines.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Self installing condoms and cock rings, perhaps remote controlled robots could do this

If you go down the robot route then you might as well install the fucking machines.

hey I'm old...not completely incapable

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

Slide sheets stand aid and a rotunda to aid some positions

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By *inkxRabbitWoman
over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

Viagra freely available. Massage by fit young persons. Booking system to book your slot with your favourite person in their room.

All joking aside, I heard about a very elderly lady who was sexually active with male escorts organised by care home staff. I think that's an excellent service so I'd like on call fit young men just waiting for my call, 24/7.

I fear you guys wouldn't have the stamina to keep up with me

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By *abrina59TV/TS
over a year ago

moved to cuckold land

Will there be a couples only room lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If any ladies want to come and look round the suggested location of Milton Keynes, I'd be more than happy to act as guide (can accommodate too)

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By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Not sure about the gummy blowjobs, dental care is better than it used to be. I also heard in times gone by that young women often had their teeth needlessly removed, as dentures had low maintenance costs, compared to teeth. A bit scary if true. But endless gummy sucking for husbands.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Care homes are great for the old fellas. It's like fab in reverse. Lots of women to every man. Now there's a thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope the carers will not lie on their application forms to get a job at the FABS Care home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Porn jigsaws in the day room. A much better pace than video

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By *omaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Incontinence pants complete with matching suspenders?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh yes please - count me in - will have to adjust my likes to include food play and water sports -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'd best put my name down

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

As I intend to invest in a portrait that will age instead of me, I'll come and visit you all every so often.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

What age can we check in?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nurse! Nurse! Its time for my blow job.

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

"What age can we check in?"

Licketysplits you can be the manager and of course you will have to test all the equipment on all 3 shifts

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"What age can we check in?

Licketysplits you can be the manager and of course you will have to test all the equipment on all 3 shifts

I was hoping for a bed for tonight!

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By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

"What age can we check in?

Licketysplits you can be the manager and of course you will have to test all the equipment on all 3 shifts

I was hoping for a bed for tonight!"

Would be lovely to be open tonight Lickety - we'll have to get a squat going instead.

I think it's great for anyone who's not planning to be in a relationship, so wouldn't have partner to help care for them. And for couples it would allow them both to be cared for, removing any pressure from them.

We'd have to have a stuffy, pee smelling visiting room, for any friends and family who'd be visiting, who don't know that we like the finer things in life. It won't be the dungeon, nor have any swings in it

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By *ophieslut OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Age is open to any of us, whenever we feel like a more communal living style, with support and care, as well as sexual mores, nearby on demand.

We will have some day care slots too, so that temporary residents can get all the advantages of Sophie's care home.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

It must be time for Nana naps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"converted baby bouncers to do the upward thrusting for us aging blokes

"
that is funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will there be half price on gigolo days?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

book me a place please! and a hydrotherapy pool would be ideal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/04/15 15:12:06]

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Will there be half price on gigolo days? "

That really should be jigglyo days for those with the shakes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wonder if staff wages be better than i get now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want in, sounds perfect!

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By *iggy1Woman
over a year ago

DORCHESTER

Gin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonder if staff wages be better than i get now "

staff bonuses might be quite good - a few perks here and there -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As I intend to invest in a portrait that will age instead of me, I'll come and visit you all every so often.

I think Dorien Gray beat you to that one!

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

A large warm swimming pool for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As I intend to invest in a portrait that will age instead of me, I'll come and visit you all every so often.

I think Dorien Gray beat you to that one!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Wonder if staff wages be better than i get now

staff bonuses might be quite good - a few pokes here and there -

Ooo er matron!

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By *inkxRabbitWoman
over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

"Care homes are great for the old fellas. It's like fab in reverse. Lots of women to every man. Now there's a thought."

You can dream love.

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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago

south staffs

Please reserve room 69 for us, thanks.

We won't be long ! lol

T & J x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonder if staff wages be better than i get now

staff bonuses might be quite good - a few pokes here and there -

Ooo er matron!"

was supposed to say perks

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By *ristol HellfireMan
over a year ago

Bristol

Private or Council; everyone will smell of pee by 3 pm.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone suggested strip Bingo yet?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Will there be half price on gigolo days?

That really should be jigglyo days for those with the shakes"

Won't have to worry about teeth scraping though,shaky or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Will there be half price on gigolo days?

That really should be jigglyo days for those with the shakes

Won't have to worry about teeth scraping though,shaky or not

giggidy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The hoist will come in handy for reverse cowgirl

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By *ingle Beds LassWoman
over a year ago

Bedfordshire

I keep reading/seeing Cab fare home

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