FabSwingers.com forum: Whats the best / worst chat up line you've ever herd?

By *ush girl OP Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

"will you throw this drink over me before I offend you as your making me so hot" so I did then felt sorry for him & started talking - reverse tactic. Am I shallow, Considering I like the girlies?

Worst - after being asked for a shag & telling him to F off he then said can I use your fanny for a wank then!

Any cringers lately?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Worst - buy me a kebab and I will let you take me home. Bleurrgh

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By *adgeeMan
over a year ago

Loch Lomond

Do people still use chat up lines?

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Worst - buy me a kebab and I will let you take me home. Bleurrgh"

That's one of my best ones!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"do you have a webcam"

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Are you coming home with me tonight or what

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They should rearrange the alphabet so that U and I are together... if you think that's cheesy you should see my knob!"

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By *ush girl OP Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

""They should rearrange the alphabet so that U and I are together... if you think that's cheesy you should see my knob!""

eew! I hope that's acaped in the doctors ear & not an offer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"your dad must be a thief"

"why,because he stole the stars from the sky and put them in my eyes?"

"No,because you look like a pikey"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Used to use "you're so hot you make the cheese under my foreskin melt" - which received a 50/50 share in laughs and slaps round the face.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One that i fell for once- was, "I bet you a quid I can make your tits jiggle without touching them"

Then felt me up and said it was worth it and gave me a quid lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

''Hello, is that babestation?''

''How much for an hour of the kinky stuff?''

Tick tock, tick tock, what’s that I hear?

It’s your biological clock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I rivet you to the bed with my rampant love rod" achieved a much better success rate though.

7/10

"Here's a dice, if you roll between a 1 and a 5 you get to go home with me."

(they ALWAYS asked, "but what if I roll a 6?") to which I'd reply, "You get another go."

Success rate: 7/10

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"You were born to suck cock"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've put a smile on my face - time to return the favour

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Sometimes its the way someone says something to you that can be horny. I had a guy come up to me one night from behind put his arms round me and whispered in my ear how long would it take to get to my house, so i thought it was rude not to show him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I said you had a great body would you hold it against me

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By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"So will you feed us afters"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no one's ever tried to chat me up

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"no one's ever tried to chat me up

awwwww hes 10p ring your mum and tell her your not coming home tonight

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

are you celibate? cause if you're selling, i'm buying.

i bet you're a right filthy bitch

i might not be the most attractive man in the room, but i'm the only one talking to you

i dont want to talk to you or buy you a drink, just fuck you. you have a minute to let me know.

ever had a parakeet? bet you've had a cock-a-too

if i was ten years older i'd shag yer, yer well sexy you are love

can i have a prune? no.

can i have a prune? no!

can i have a prune? NO!!!

ok, how about a date?

show us it

oh, my personal favourite "roar like a tiger "..."?!"...then he licked my arm, roared and walked off, before turning around and sinking his teeth in my ass

these are the ones i can remember...can you guess how many worked?

if you start at one and work down....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"no one's ever tried to chat me up

awwwww hes 10p ring your mum and tell her your not coming home tonight

oh i forgot that one...but i got, here's 20p, go ring your mom...tell her i'll be another half hour.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From an Irishman..

Got any Irsh in you..Want some?

You look like you have a bone missing....Mine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cant remember ever having any corny chat up lines, woe is me, but reading this thread is making me laugh - i think the worst one is your so hot your making the cheese on my knob melt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hiya gorgeous, bet you've flattened some grass over the years, eh luv?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

You must be knackered youve been running through my mind all night.

Excuse me but ive lost my phone number can i borrow yours

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Worst - after being asked for a shag & telling him to F off he then said can I use your fanny for a wank then!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Eeh by gum - you don't sweat much for a fat lass! Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

10 years older babe i would

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

funniest i had was ~excuse me fuck me if im wrong ........ but have we met? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha ha ha

My mate said a good one to a girl in a nightclub. he asked her "Excuse me, is there a condom machine in the ladies loo's?" She said "Yes, why?" he answered "Get some cuz youve pulled"

Gave us all a laugh

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"Ha ha ha

My mate said a good one to a girl in a nightclub. he asked her "Excuse me, is there a condom machine in the ladies loo's?" She said "Yes, why?" he answered "Get some cuz youve pulled"

Gave us all a laugh

pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Since i'm an old romantic the one that got them melting was....

'If i made the alphabet i would put u and i together'

Its soppy but works all the time.

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

F&ck that looks a big cock in those jeans

Well it got my attention

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since i'm an old romantic the one that got them melting was....

'If i made the alphabet i would put u and i together'

Its soppy but works all the time.

Changed my name to Doug

Why cos is God spelt backwards whilst I wrap U up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hi how are you, fancy a pint n a fuk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/09/10 20:18:06]

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By *ush girl OP Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

C'mon it'll only take a minute!

Hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Call me a fanny but I can see my face in your knickers!

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

It's not particularly humorous but the psychology is strong behind it and I have had 100% success rate with it (it's worked 6 times). Mind, I put a lot of that down to the selection process before hand

Walk up to a girl point over at your friend (preferably less attractive friend) and say 'Hi it's my friend's birthday, can I have a kiss?'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tall bird looked right over me head and said "wheres that voice comin from" xx

(she soon found out lol xx

) xx

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By *hite SnakeMan
over a year ago

leeds

I said to a bird in Benidorm last week "I'm normally a boob man but you've got the best arse I've seen all week" worked really well (she also had the best tits I'd seen all week too).

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

There are 206 bones in the human body... do you want another one?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your nice wanna fuck ? but to be fair I haven't used it since Saturday night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When asked the question " What do you say to a little f..k?" she replied "Id say Good Night Sir" and walked off.

On the other hand I did once succeed with "Nice dress .... And it wont clash with my bedroom carpet"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so do you want me to do you then or what, i said i would so i will if you want me to"

This little pearl of wisdom after driving two hours to meet at his home a guy i had been talking to for weeks. He was everything your nighmares can conjour up. As well as a twat lo, i said thanks but no thanks and left as quick as i could. God the things we do for some fun lol xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If i said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me.

I know cheesy but i was thinking it was sweet xxx JO XXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" ... He was everything your nighmares can conjour up. As well as a twat lo, i said thanks but no thanks and left as quick as i could. God the things we do for some fun lol xx

Ffs... An I fought me lime mankini were a hot match fer me wellies...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

one that made me laugh my arse of was on a game actually

"nice legs, what time do they open"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LOL, these are priceless.

I think someone's been reading my little black book from when I was 17!

What about - "Do you come here often? - Would you like to?"

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By *mf4BxJCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

I (fem) have a single fem profile here to meet other single fems for ff fun alone.

A single man mailed me charmingly telling me he could get me pussy. I played along and it ended in him saying he could get me pussy whenever I wanted but 'he'd have to have a fuck at me as well'.

How could I resist?

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By *adcowWoman
over a year ago

kirkcaldy

"oh shit the elastic has gone in my boxers - do you have needle and thread at your place"

was from my ex and i was stupid enough to fall for it

my friend was asked "whats the chances of you and your friend playing with my balls -her reply " dpends if that s before or after the kick in them and turning them into your new earrings"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One received today: Want to see my big cock on MSN? And in text speak too, which I cannot replicate!

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By *lumsy colinMan
over a year ago

basingstoke

"no one's ever tried to chat me up

awwwww hes 10p ring your mum and tell her your not coming home tonight

oh i forgot that one...but i got, here's 20p, go ring your mom...tell her i'll be another half hour. if you guys gave him a quid he could jiggle testarosa,s tits

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excuse me?

I'm not falling for it twice!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When out horseriding I did get comments about lucky horse though!

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

A friend and I went out the other night, and we had a competition between us, we each had 1 chat up line, and had to see how successful we were.

This was in a bi/gay/transgender club in Milton Keynes. We both tried the chat up lines on females (I'm female, my friend is male).

His was "I broke my bed last night, can I borrow yours tonight?"

Mine was "I've lost my scarf, can I use your legs instead?"

Surprisingly (!?!?!?) none of us had any luck. We made quite a few people laugh though.

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By *ush girl OP Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

This worked for me as an ice breaker

'your hair looks gorgeous! Can I ask who cuts it for you? Intact your gorgeous. You must come from a beautiful family' conversation leads on.....

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By *ouple4funnewCouple
over a year ago

liverpool

here's two I've been guilty of:

" I have an intuition about you..."

" you have great energy...."

never compliment a gorgeous woman on her looks, she knows she's gorgeous and gets enough male attntion on that point as it is... get her attention with something unusual, get them curious first... but what do I know?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's your cum face look like? Show me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was in a club in Blackpool and asked a girl for a light - she said I dont smoke but I'll suck your cock anytime...

I must have looked a bit shocked cos a mate came over and I told him what she had said and she repeated it...

Found somewhere dark and she was pretty good... but spat!

So if you ever get stuck to the carpet in a club...

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