FabSwingers.com forum: LOL Chat up lines

By *eaton steele OP Man
over a year ago

South Norwood

What the best chat up line you haveused Guys , and whats the worst line you have heard girls ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Let's play titanic, I'll shout iceberg and you go down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I liked the one i see on here, where the bloke was going up to woman with a toothbrush and saying..WELL.

My sense of humour that

Her

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By *icky999Man
over a year ago

warrington

Fancy a fuck?

.. its nearly as big as a sky remote.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fancy a fuck?

.. its nearly as big as a sky remote. "

....if you don't, do you mind lying down while I have one

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Get your coat.....you've pulled

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By *eaton steele OP Man
over a year ago

South Norwood

" Fat penguin".!!!

Just wanted to say something to break the ice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U had ur tits weighed... no..

grab them and go way! Got a high 5 once for doing it and not kidding a punch another haha!

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Say to a woman "I bet you a drink that i can guess when you were born from touching your breasts"

Then carry on touching them until she gets fed up and says "come on tell me when was I born"

Answer "yesterday"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a filthy girl like you doing in a nice place like this... Wait! No, I meant... can I try that again?"

"Can I have your autograph?"

"I'm going to the bar, what can I get you?"

but the all time top of the list chat-up line has to be...

"Hello."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""What a filthy girl like you doing in a nice place like this... Wait! No, I meant... can I try that again?"

"Can I have your autograph?"

"I'm going to the bar, what can I get you?"

but the all time top of the list chat-up line has to be...

"Hello.""

the top one was used on me, made me laugh, and as we were both waithing at the bar to be served started chatting, ended up taking him home, and him not leaving till the following evening, still friends 6 yrs later,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I deeply regret that it is my unfortunate duty to bring it to your attention that you are above and beyond our maximum standards for looks. You are clearly a 9.5/10 and here we only allow 6/10 maximum.

Your account will be Closed unless you reply to this message with your name, your favorite flower, how many Monster munch you can fit in your mouth at once and if you prefer Chinese or Italian cuisine. This is very serious business and I would advise you not to take my message lightly or you might anger my boss Poseidon, the lord of the seas.

The End

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

do you like dragons..? cos ill be dragging my balls across your face tonight

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By *hyblueEyesMan
over a year ago

Daventry

The word of the day is 'legs'

Now let's go outside and spread the word

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I refuse to chat people up!

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By *trawberry-popWoman
over a year ago

South East Midlands NOT

I'd like to see you in nothing but a big smile and a thin layer of sweat.

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By *o-jCouple
over a year ago

Outskirts of Notts

Fancy going halves on a cheap hotel in Derby ......

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By *eaton steele OP Man
over a year ago

South Norwood

That's a mew one to me , Il use it tonight and see what happens , LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I deeply regret that it is my unfortunate duty to bring it to your attention that you are above and beyond our maximum standards for looks. You are clearly a 9.5/10 and here we only allow 6/10 maximum.

The End "

I had that today!!!

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

"Say to a woman "I bet you a drink that i can guess when you were born from touching your breasts"

Then carry on touching them until she gets fed up and says "come on tell me when was I born"

Answer "yesterday""

Thats fucking ace

. If you have tried this one - *high 5*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My favourite is....

"What's this cloth smell like?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you were a Macdonalds you'd be a Macgorgeous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you 2 sisters ?

Yes we are. !!!

Where's Cinderella ?

Now you see why I am single

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What the best chat up line you haveused Guys , and whats the worst line you have heard girls ?"
Pull up a dick and take a seat! Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you were a Macdonalds you'd be a Macgorgeous

"
That one made laugh lol

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By *eaton steele OP Man
over a year ago

South Norwood

Corny works sometimes LOL

Nice legs !!! What time they open .

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By *eaton steele OP Man
over a year ago

South Norwood

WOW What a post , !!!!!!!!

But you have to be a virgin , if you wernt you wouldn have time to write all that !! LOL

Ifu were a true swinger , Cool post LOL xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Let's play titanic, I'll shout iceberg and you go down "

Lmao that's brilliant, made me proper laugh!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a scale of 1-10

I'd give you one....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

looks wise you remind me of my dead gf she was awful in bed are you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On a scale of 1-10

I'd give you one...."

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By *omaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 18/03/15 00:49:29]

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By *omaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

My face will be leaving in 25 minutes. I want you to be on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe we could go out, have a nice dinner and I could book us a room somewhere.

I don't think my husband would like that.

Fine. It'll just be you and me then!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love these. Really made me giggle. Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Get your coat.....you've pulled"
address?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wanna go halves on a bastard ?

Just one I heard lol

Him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'Ere, somebody hold me chips!.....

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By *icky-discoMan
over a year ago

oxford

Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did you just fart? Coz you blew me away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you like diamonds ? Well suck my cock it's a gem.

Him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Let us take a chance and toss a coin.

If i win I will have sex with you. If you win you can have sex with me.

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By *ee340Man
over a year ago

Wallington

"is there a mirror in your knicker's , co's i can see myself in them"

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By *r Hung4funMan
over a year ago

craigavon

That's a nice pair of new heels !! I'd like to see them behind your ears !! And believe it or not that chat up line worked !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It wasn't deliberate, and not so much of a chat up line, but...

In a nightclub, me and my mate were approached by a very fit, gorgeous guy. He asked our names and I was half asleep (d*unk-ish) so my mate said her name and my name.

I didn't say anything.

He asked if I couldn't speak?

So I signed something to my mate as a joke (I know the sign language alphabet).

The guy was mortified and embarrassed and very apologetic!

So I laughed and said, or I could just talk to you directly?

Yeah we ended up fucking against a wall on the beach a couple of hours later. Yum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do u know algebra. Will u replace my Ex with U and not ask Y

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guy: Do you like math?

Girl: No.

Guy: Me neither...In fact, the only number I care about is yours.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like to teach u maths.

let add a bed.remove your clothes.divide your legs and multiply

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By *inkxRabbitWoman
over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

The response to my status that I had the day to myself:

him in a message:fancy a shag

Me:delete

The worst bit? No punctuation!

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By *inkxRabbitWoman
over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

"Maybe we could go out, have a nice dinner and I could book us a room somewhere.

I don't think my husband would like that.

Fine. It'll just be you and me then!"

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By *omaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Quite unintentional but was chatting to a female work colleague in a lunch break about pets.

She is a cat lover and said there is nothing more relaxing than a good movie, a bag of popcorn and stroking my kitty. . . . As soon as the word "kitty"left her lips she realised what she had said. . . . Her face went redder than a baboons ass !

The mouthful of coffee I had ended up all over the canteen. . .

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