FabSwingers.com forum: Foreplay

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have a slight issue.

Lady is far more about penetration than any kind of foreplay, So it often gets skipped. I like it (giving and recieveng), but it's hard not to be drawn in when a women just wants to be penetrated.

Lady cums much quicker than me, normally I would be proud of how long I can last but actually its a bit inconvenient. Because although she can cum several times, she has what you might call a 'final' cum, after which she wont have any more. And if I haven't cum yet, this can be frustrating as although she still enjoys the sex, its not quite the same for either of us.

Lady and I have discussed it, and whilst we do agree that giving me a head start with some foreplay would be a good idea, in the heat of the moment the plan is always forgotten.

How can I gently remind her before we start that it would benefit us both for a bit of a warm up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How can I gently remind her before we start that it would benefit us both for a bit of a warm up."

... by just getting on with it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How about her finish you off with a blow job after she has finished

Saying that I have met loads of guys who dont give a shit once they have cum so made me smile a bit to see a woman doing it

Sorry

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Just waggle your cock in her face while saying 'open wide'

That should do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remind her before you start?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How about her finish you off with a blow job after she has finished

Saying that I have met loads of guys who dont give a shit once they have cum so made me smile a bit to see a woman doing it

Sorry

Blow job would be a step backwards surely. We still have the sex, its just not the same.

I'm going to pretend the 'making me smile' comment as solidarity rather than gleeful schadenfreude.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Remind her before you start?

Was hoping to find something subtle.

Not 'Oi Darlin' don't forget to suck it first'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How about her finish you off with a blow job after she has finished

Saying that I have met loads of guys who dont give a shit once they have cum so made me smile a bit to see a woman doing it

Sorry

Blow job would be a step backwards surely. We still have the sex, its just not the same.

A blow jobs a step backwards?

really?

I love a guy to go down on me after I've had a shag, and before and during) I suppose it depends what you like, I've never seen oral as a step backwards

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How about her finish you off with a blow job after she has finished

Saying that I have met loads of guys who dont give a shit once they have cum so made me smile a bit to see a woman doing it

Sorry

Blow job would be a step backwards surely. We still have the sex, its just not the same.

A blow jobs a step backwards?

really?

I love a guy to go down on me after I've had a shag, and before and during) I suppose it depends what you like, I've never seen oral as a step backwards "

Maybe its a guy thing. Or me thing. Just always felt blow jobs were a step on the way to sex.

But then I'm more of a handjob guy.

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

In fact oral after she has cum can keep her rolling for ages.

As for the ops problem...cant help.

Oh hold on. How about some postits round the bedroom and some 'Don't forget to suck this' undercrackers

Sorry for not being serious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How about a 3sum so you have someone else to shag when

she's spent

OK I admit I'm running out of ideas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Remind her before you start?

Was hoping to find something subtle.

Not 'Oi Darlin' don't forget to suck it first'."

Your question was how to remind her before you start.

Unless you have a written memorandum prepared or are both fluent in sign language, I really can't think of a more practical solution than verbal communication. How you phrase it is up to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Remind her before you start?

Was hoping to find something subtle.

Not 'Oi Darlin' don't forget to suck it first'.

Your question was how to remind her before you start.

Unless you have a written memorandum prepared or are both fluent in sign language, I really can't think of a more practical solution than verbal communication. How you phrase it is up to you."

Suck this bitch?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Introduce sexy chat to your sex. Whisper stuff in her ear about how you'd love her to do *what you want* then you're going to do *what she likes*.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Dare I tell her she cums too quick so I'll have to sub her off...

Post its are unsubtle but might work.

Thanks for the ideas, the serious ones are definitely food for thought.

Just to be clear this is only really a problem when her last cum is siginifcantly before my mine. Often we time it nicely.

She also doesn't know if it'll be her last until its happened, so she can hold off. Not that she really can do it anyway.

Interestingly there is a lot of help out there for men who current to quick, a d ridicule to be fair.

Not a lot for women.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Remind her before you start?

Was hoping to find something subtle.

Not 'Oi Darlin' don't forget to suck it first'.

Your question was how to remind her before you start.

Unless you have a written memorandum prepared or are both fluent in sign language, I really can't think of a more practical solution than verbal communication. How you phrase it is up to you."

Well that essentially was the question. How could something like that be discussed at the time without spoiling the mood, baring in mind that by this point she is already turned on and craving penetration.

Its an easy conversation outside of the heat of the moment, but a bit tricky at the time itself.

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By *ath_Neil_bifunCouple
over a year ago

near cardiff

Grab her hair,tell her to get on her knees and then fuck her face for a bit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well that essentially was the question. How could something like that be discussed at the time without spoiling the mood, baring in mind that by this point she is already turned on and craving penetration.

Its an easy conversation outside of the heat of the moment, but a bit tricky at the time itself."

If you cannot communicate in or before "the heat of the moment," there are likely to be unresolved issues. Try it. You are about to get intimate so express that verbally. No need to feel embarrassed.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

OP - try orgasm denial.

You will get off on the tease - and she will explode on the final act? It can last exactly how long as you want... hours the whole day - I have lasted a full 12 hours of tease. Some talk on here of days of denial.. this is doable but on a regular sex life ... a good amount of tease will get you both off very well.

It is eruption, with scale!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Its an easy conversation outside of the heat of the moment, but a bit tricky at the time itself.

If you cannot communicate in or before "the heat of the moment," there are likely to be unresolved issues. Try it. You are about to get intimate so express that verbally. No need to feel embarrassed."

Thanks but its not about embarrassment, its about handling it sensitively, and not ruining the moment.

I don't think anyone would like to be told they cum too quickly just before sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"OP - try orgasm denial.

It is eruption, with scale!

Now that is an idea I like. Not only hopefully solving the problem but turning it to my advantage.

Its a different angle to why I was thinking, exactly why I asked on here really.

I have done this with her before, but not for this reason.

Top marks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Job done.

Got there in they end! No pun intended.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Now that is an idea I like. Not only hopefully solving the problem but turning it to my advantage.

Its a different angle to why I was thinking, exactly why I asked on here really.

I have done this with her before, but not for this reason.

Top marks."

dont tell her you are going to - dick in ... cock to mouth - finger to clit - holes, alternates, tempos, maybe some restraints to keep her hands steady or positioned. A good gauge chain and D-clips work well better than pad locks (as you can easily lose the key) if you get comfy mixing it up in the future. Otherwise there are obvious position changes, obvious toys, vibs... all that turn on and by accident - turn off just at the most inappropriate of peaks - just when you need a brew

You can be very wicked in leaving 'hot spots', but with denial it is in the mastery of the denial before the eventual giving that. Maybe discussion would be useful prior but all depends on the woman and how relaxed toward sex she is,

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Get her a small piece of leather to bite onto

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

Sometime I am satisfied before hubby is, so we finish things off with a BJ. That way we are both happy, I don't have to keep having penetration after I'm done, and he gets his happy ending too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its an easy conversation outside of the heat of the moment, but a bit tricky at the time itself.

If you cannot communicate in or before "the heat of the moment," there are likely to be unresolved issues. Try it. You are about to get intimate so express that verbally. No need to feel embarrassed.

Thanks but its not about embarrassment, its about handling it sensitively, and not ruining the moment.

I don't think anyone would like to be told they cum too quickly just before sex."

Then prepare how you will say it. I cannot add anymore. Surely the solution is, as they say, in your hands. If you are not embarrassed, then just work out in advance what words you will use. Noone here knows her like you do.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Its an easy conversation outside of the heat of the moment, but a bit tricky at the time itself.

If you cannot communicate in or before "the heat of the moment," there are likely to be unresolved issues. Try it. You are about to get intimate so express that verbally. No need to feel embarrassed.

Thanks but its not about embarrassment, its about handling it sensitively, and not ruining the moment.

I don't think anyone would like to be told they cum too quickly just before sex.

Not that I don't welcome your attempts to help. But what you're suggesting is merely the mechanism I was already, decided on. Without answering the question of how.

You've essentially repeated my question back to me as a solution to the question.

Once again, thanks, but I think we were at crossed wires.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With the proviso that the solution is in your own hands. Do you want people to dictate the words for you? That really would not work. Take responsibility.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Grab her hair,tell her to get on her knees and then fuck her face for a bit

That's what I'd do. aha!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"With the proviso that the solution is in your own hands. Do you want people to dictate the words for you? That really would not work. Take responsibility."

I was asking for suggestions, not exact instructions. Perhaps if that wasn't clear to you from the question, it could have been from the fact I have feedback I gave to you and others with suggestions.

I have explained the situation to you many times, if you haven't grasped it, perhaps leave it alone.

It seems to be only you who hasn't full understood my meaning.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"With the proviso that the solution is in your own hands. Do you want people to dictate the words for you? That really would not work. Take responsibility.

I have explained the situation to you many times, if you haven't grasped it, perhaps leave it alone.

It seems to be only you who hasn't full understood my meaning."

Ah, then I shall leave it alone. I hope you find the right suggestion from other more sensible posters.

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