FabSwingers.com forum: Shit the fucking bed

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I go for a wee wee to find my son has actually put the toilet roll on the toilet roll holder!!!!

He has never done that! I'm actually gobsmacked

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Is it the right way round though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to ask him what's he done lol

He's caused some mischief somewhere haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He's up to something!

Start questioning him!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's he after?

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooo ... Thats the wrong way round

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooooooooo OVER!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooo ... Thats the wrong way round

That's what I was thinking

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooooooooo OVER!!!!

This. ALWAYS over!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooo ... Thats the wrong way round

It has to be over.

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooo ... Thats the wrong way round

Correct, toilet paper goes over, everyone knows that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OVER - or instant death !!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This under or over is not all it cracks up to be.

Mine is upright on the tap. Easier to reach and pull off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OVER - or instant death !!"

sorry meant UNDER !

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Wrong answer

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

Hahaha thankfully no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OVER - or instant death !!

sorry meant UNDER !"

You're indivisible aren't you ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ermm what's toilet paper ??????

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Have two: one over and one under.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erm, isn't the toilet roll meant to be under the dress of that little red doll? I forgot where i saw that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It feels weird "over"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm a folder too, not a scruncher

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Erm, isn't the toilet roll meant to be under the dress of that little red doll? I forgot where i saw that.

We had one of those for the spare. She wore a crocheted white dress.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So you haven't actually shit the bed then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I go for a wee wee to find my son has actually put the toilet roll on the toilet roll holder!!!!

He has never done that! I'm actually gobsmacked

Definitely done something.......expect a confession soon! Ha

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

Has to go over...

and I have to admit to being worried to open this thread on here... lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It has to be under.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm a folder too, not a scruncher

Don't start that one again. You'll have the forum totally divided.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We solved the issue by having one that sticks up from the floor, spins round the way not down.

Actually think it's a kitchen roll holder but does the job!

Congrats on getting someone else to remember to replace toilet roll, we have the toilet roll fairy in this house.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a folder too, not a scruncher

Don't start that one again. You'll have the forum totally divided.

There's nowt worse than when the paper divides.

Apparently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm just wondering what's he done. It must have been bad.

I can imagine Afro going ape shit crazy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have two: one over and one under.

This is how it is in our house

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a folder too, not a scruncher

Don't start that one again. You'll have the forum totally divided.

You have to fold. Who doesn't fold?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Erm, isn't the toilet roll meant to be under the dress of that little red doll? I forgot where i saw that.

We had one of those for the spare. She wore a crocheted white dress.

My mother used to have a blue one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm just wondering what's he done. It must have been bad.

I can imagine Afro going ape shit crazy.

It's not a pretty site.

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

ours is some where in the bathroom ...i take the light bulbs out sometimes and write clues like aneka rice on treasure hunt ...we dont have a helicopter yet but all donations are welcome !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things "

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

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By *inkxRabbitWoman
over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

My son won't even go and get one if it runs out. He just doesn't wipe and then, predictably, one of the female members of the household gets marooned without any paper! I wouldn't mind, but we have a six roll stacker too. He uses more than a roll a day and blocks the toilet all the time but never, ever fills it up again.

Grrrrrrr

He's 14 and autistic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/03/15 21:50:47]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm a folder too, not a scruncher

Don't start that one again. You'll have the forum totally divided.

There's nowt worse than when the paper divides.

Apparently.

Not if you have decent toilet roll. And not just 1 sheet!

I have at least 3 for a wee and ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

"
hard to write laghing so much!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OVER - or instant death !!"

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

If I'm visiting a friend and notice its an under, I change it to over.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have two: one over and one under.

I have 3....all over!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine just sits on top of the cystern

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don't think he has done anything.. But he would like a pair of shorts for our holiday together in July (which Iv already said I'd get)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who cares if he put it over or under he put it on, that's all that matters!!

If you tell me your son leaves the bathroom exactly as he found it I'll hate you forever...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Mine just sits on top of the cystern

Can't stand that, reaching back, hurting my arm and back in the process!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

I don't believe there is such a thing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

I don't believe there is such a thing. "

There is!!! Iv seen 2!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

Nopety Nope nope can't deal with that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mine just sits on top of the cystern

Can't stand that, reaching back, hurting my arm and back in the process!

So you want it holding then

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Who cares if he put it over or under he put it on, that's all that matters!!

If you tell me your son leaves the bathroom exactly as he found it I'll hate you forever...

Not quite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody hell don't get me started for my routine morning after a curry!!!!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

I don't believe there is such a thing. "

Just Google vacuum cleaner doll covers for the most horrific things ever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

Lol I probably shouldn't say this but I have after a night out ha

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

I don't believe there is such a thing.

Just Google vacuum cleaner doll covers for the most horrific things ever.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

Lol I probably shouldn't say this but I have after a night out ha

Noooooooo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

I don't believe there is such a thing.

Just Google vacuum cleaner doll covers for the most horrific things ever.

Jaysus , what the dickens is going on there. Some are a little bit woo woo.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

Lol I probably shouldn't say this but I have after a night out ha

Noooooooo "

Haha! Ar ye was absolutely hammered and woke up in morning and... we'll put it this way I get piss taken out of me a bit ha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

Lol I probably shouldn't say this but I have after a night out ha

noooo some things we dont need to know

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Those dolls can fuck off. Weird looking things

Ha!

What about Hoover doll covers!

What is that? Sounds like some next level scary shit. Don't scare me. I just confessed to you I can't even watch horrors

It's fabric that looks like a lady and goes over the Hoover to make it look pretty.. Too scary for you

I don't believe there is such a thing.

Just Google vacuum cleaner doll covers for the most horrific things ever.

Jaysus , what the dickens is going on there. Some are a little bit woo woo. "

Dogs, cats, rabbits and other things dressed like extras from Little House on the Prairie... it makes you wonder about the mind that could think up such things.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

Lol I probably shouldn't say this but I have after a night out ha

Noooooooo

Haha! Ar ye was absolutely hammered and woke up in morning and... we'll put it this way I get piss taken out of me a bit ha!"

Having the piss taken out of you is not the same as the shit falling out of you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phew! There's no actual shit in the bed though... is there?

this was my thought

Lol I probably shouldn't say this but I have after a night out ha

Noooooooo

Haha! Ar ye was absolutely hammered and woke up in morning and... we'll put it this way I get piss taken out of me a bit ha!

Having the piss taken out of you is not the same as the shit falling out of you.

Ha I don't give a 'shit'! And I can assure u it didn't.... I'll say no more!

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

If I'm visiting a friend and notice its an under, I change it to over.

I thought I was the only person who did that in other peoples houses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

If I'm visiting a friend and notice its an under, I change it to over.

I thought I was the only person who did that in other peoples houses

I can believe that too

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

If I'm visiting a friend and notice its an under, I change it to over.

I thought I was the only person who did that in other peoples houses

My aunt used to change the cutlery drawer if it wasn't laid out the way she thought it should be. She'd move things around a bathroom without even thinking about it. She would change the toilet roll to her way too. Thankfully, she's dead now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

If I'm visiting a friend and notice its an under, I change it to over.

I thought I was the only person who did that in other peoples houses

My mother in law does this. She's even changed the sofas around. Her argument is that it works better her way.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"actually my fella is an under and I`m an over - it's a constant battle of the toilet roll - sends him bonkers when I change it around - which, of course, I do at every available opportunity

If I'm visiting a friend and notice its an under, I change it to over.

I thought I was the only person who did that in other peoples houses

My mother in law does this. She's even changed the sofas around. Her argument is that it works better her way. "

My aunt incensed one of my cousins when she stayed with them as she threw away his favourite mug because she thought it was ugly.

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By *umourCouple
over a year ago

Rushden

If you have the toilet roll in the "over" position, you only see the outside of the roll. If you have it in the "under" position, you see what is effectively the inside of the roll. Same as if you hang curtains, you hang them to face inwards for your benefit.

So, how does your curtain hanging equate to your toilet roll position?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's under!

That way when you FOLD it the nice quilted outside is the bit your arse gets to touch.

There is NEVER any reason to scrunch Ladies - 17 sheets screwed up into a ball is not acceptable.

Don't then moan when there's none left because there was only 1.8 sheets left on the roll when we sat down....

Put the seat back up when you've finished - we don't want to touch it either

Honestly - it's like herding cats sometimes....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

There is no right way as it depends on how one likes the paper to hang

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We solved the issue by having one that sticks up from the floor, spins round the way not down.

++++++++++++++++++++

ahh but does it spin clockwise or anticlockwise when you pull?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We solved the issue by having one that sticks up from the floor, spins round the way not down.

++++++++++++++++++++

ahh but does it spin clockwise or anticlockwise when you pull?

we have a loo roll pole - im right handed and daughter left handed - it shifts around something chronic - great when she heads back to uni

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's over and I'm a scruncher

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's under!

That way when you FOLD it the nice quilted outside is the bit your arse gets to touch.

There is NEVER any reason to scrunch Ladies - 17 sheets screwed up into a ball is not acceptable.

Don't then moan when there's none left because there was only 1.8 sheets left on the roll when we sat down....

Put the seat back up when you've finished - we don't want to touch it either

Honestly - it's like herding cats sometimes...."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep, I have a vertical one attached to the wall. So the question now is, should it hang to the left or the right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooooooooo OVER!!!!

Spanks, then runs off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooooooooo OVER!!!!

Spanks, then runs off

"
giggidy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it the right way round though

Yes under

Noooooooooo OVER!!!!

Spanks, then runs off

giggidy

Spanks you too!

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