FabSwingers.com forum: Falling for a meet

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Im wondering if this has ever happened to anyone. Having met and play with a single guy on here a few times, a couple of weeks ago i caught myself thinking about him romanticly.

Now i know that it was ment to be all fun and even myself i was quiet taken a back by what i was thinking

Trouble is im now worried that if i meet him again and these feeling arise and i setting myself up for a fall as i know FB is all hes interested in. Even tho are last meet he admitted that it wasnt just sex he was making love to me.

HELP!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

your only Human, speak to the Guy and good luck

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

You can either tell him what your thoughts are and chance him having the same thoughts, or you can decide not to meet him again to save you getting too involved and then hurt when it has to end.

Either way, if it was me, I would do it sooner rather than later.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know a few couples on here that have started like that lol

Personally it aint summat i would do cause im not lookin for romance

But if ya both comfortable with it why not see how it goes

Take it slowly and good luck xx

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I would talk to him, maybe he feels the same but if he is only looking for f/b you need to prepare yourself for the fact that he may not be reading from the same hymn sheet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you know he's only interested in fb? He probably thinks you are too. Now I'm not one to bang the drum about love, been there, done that & the one that I fell for is now a singleton on here & I avoid his profile to subsequently avoid the tugging of my heart strings but who said a meet from here can't turn into something more?

I've heard of several singles that have then become couples because they developed feelings.

Don't do the whole 'oooh keep the emotions seperate then I won't get hurt' thing. Love hurts. Life hurts. A lot of things hurt. But it's a risk we take on a daily basis and if you met him on here, in Tesco's or at a friends wedding, so what? Go with your heart honey & if anything more happens then brilliant!

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Hmmmmm or he could be one of those guys that love it when a woman falls for them,and will say all the things he knows a woman loves to hear but has no intention of ever being more than an FB

Best to try and deal with it now so you know where you stand

I think I have woken up with my cynical head on today

It may be the complete opposite of what I have just said and he feels a real connection with you xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh Honey, I was feeling all Notting Hill/Dirty Dancing then & now you've got me back to my grumpy 'all men are twats' thinking!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh Honey, I was feeling all Notting Hill/Dirty Dancing then & now you've got me back to my grumpy 'all men are twats' thinking!!!!

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

Give it a go.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the advice im going to chat with him tonight!

What have i got to lose???

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I would contact him and be honest.

Do it quick too.

Mail or text him and say that you had a great time but felt a real connection and just trying to work out if we are both still feeling it. Ask if he felt it too, also I would say in the mail/text to him that if you have read things wrong and he is just looking for a fook buddy and nothing more then say that if he feels it best to not meet again if your heart is there and his isnt.

Better to be honest and say it and see what happens.

Out of all the people I have met there has been very very few men that I have felt a massive connection with and have questioned myself.

One is was a single man and did speak to him about it as wasnt expecting it. I prefer to be open and get it all out there.

Then if it all goes great, lovely, if not then you may have to avoid the person or accept it is no more than just a f/b.

Good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

..or you could just keep on sucking his cock until he thinks, "Fuck me, she's good at this, I might as well marry her!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh come on Wishy, do men REALLY ever think like that???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh come on Wishy, do men REALLY ever think like that???"

I did. And I'm married now!

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By *tu23Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

Suppose its only natural to have feelings, also if he described it as "makeing love" it could also be a subcontios reaction. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for the advice im going to chat with him tonight!

What have i got to lose???

Good luck for tonight. You never know he may have read this forum post

Be honest up front & remember over a phone you hear a voice. you can't see facial expressions that show true feelings!

Be careful but most of all be true to yourself.

I have a few friends on here that have found love so it does happen - I also have some that have been hurt so remember keep your defenses low to allow him in but close by to guard yourself

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"..or you could just keep on sucking his cock until he thinks, "Fuck me, she's good at this, I might as well marry her!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you're meetings must be very intense and emotional for the l word to get a mention.

perhaps it's just me, but i associate love with something that's more deep rooted thasn sex and is more to do with respect, desire and a need to be with that person on top of having shared experiences with that person.

i've had intimate meets, being single it happens...sometimes people miss more than just the sex and if we're boh willing, why not? though i'm always careful to not mistake this for anything else.

sounds like intense lust to me...not trying to put a dampner on it, but how well do you know the person aside from the sex and beyond the asl?

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By *andoras DreamCouple
over a year ago

Swindon Area

its a bit like falling for a popstar or a main character of a film or (i do this all the time) falling for the main star of a show at the theatre.

although different because you have had sex with this person, but they make you feel very special and you end up fantasising about them being your partner, going for long walks, having pillow fights together and cosy nights in!! when he mentioned he was making love to you, he just a very sensitive guy that knows what women want to hear.

good luck if you choose to tell him, you just never know but as the post above says it could just be lust.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

be honest and tell him if he is still there chatting fuck his brains out and say god im hungry and fancy a beer trouble is if i eat and drink i get horny turn me down if you wish my bet is he wont leave your side an if your feeling really brave say if i ironed all your shirts we could go on the holiday of a life time you only get one shot so make it count if its love he wont go and if its passion all the way enjoy the ride honey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes there is the danger of 'falling' for someone you meet here.

It's intense, it's confusing and it hurts like hell. (yes I've done that too!)

But best to do as others say and talk... He may feel the same, he may be saying what you wish to hear.

Honesty with yourself and him is the best policy. But also be prepared to lose him.

You never know, love does happen with people who meet here.

I wish you luck and love if that is what you both want. xxxx

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By *pecial bbCouple
over a year ago

london

Enjoy the moment, but do expect poss rejection, you are still in the honeymoon period. Good luck! Bb

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By *uss PussWoman
over a year ago

east cheshire

"Im wondering if this has ever happened to anyone. Having met and play with a single guy on here a few times, a couple of weeks ago i caught myself thinking about him romanticly.

Now i know that it was ment to be all fun and even myself i was quiet taken a back by what i was thinking

HELP!"

Well if he reads the forums he now knows

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Good luck toptits!

Be prepared for him to be spooked and take flight, then anything else that happens will be a bonus!

Love can happen when you least expect it!

Incidentally, I once hurt my knee 'falling over a meat' as you put it. It was a frozen steak, very slippy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Incidentally, I once hurt my knee 'falling over a meat' as you put it. It was a frozen steak, very slippy.

Mwahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Be honest and I hope it works out for you both.

good luck xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"be honest and tell him if he is still there chatting fuck his brains out and say god im hungry and fancy a beer trouble is if i eat and drink i get horny turn me down if you wish my bet is he wont leave your side an if your feeling really brave say if i ironed all your shirts we could go on the holiday of a life time you only get one shot so make it count if its love he wont go and if its passion all the way enjoy the ride honey

If she offers to iron HIS shirts ? What fookin dark age do some of you live in ?

She want's to fuck him not butler for h im.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

If she offers to iron HIS shirts ? What fookin dark age do some of you live in ?

She want's to fuck him not butler for h im.

one of your finest Granny xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lol we have been out to dinner and i have cooked for him and made breakfast!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lol we have been out to dinner and i have cooked for him and made breakfast!

But.... but...... come on I'm dying from the suspense!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for the advice im going to chat with him tonight!

What have i got to lose???

Well you have a good meet to lose if he is scared off .

Me.i would go with the flow and see how things pan out.

But good luck with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

didya speak to him yet? i'm eagerly awaiting the outcome here!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well hes read the email and as of yet no reply but has signed on here and has not said hi for the past hour

So i guess i have my answer!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get the iron out kid.....

and ram it up his .......

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Well hes read the email and as of yet no reply but has signed on here and has not said hi for the past hour

So i guess i have my answer!

He may well be overwhelmed and reading all of this before he makes a considered response.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Well he may need time to digest it all.

Give him the space and hope it works

out.

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Get the iron out kid.....

and ram it up his ......."

Is that before or after ironing all of his shirts?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/09/10 21:18:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sorry to hear that he hadn;t even got the balls for a response toptits, I had similar experience last year, where we decided to date for a few weeks, then he did the i'm not going to get in contact with you trick, so i got over it, moved on had lots more fun and enjoyed myself, last night I get a phone call from him, saying he made a big mistake and do I fancy a drink sometime to try again..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bugger. well if you need consoling at all later on, you know where we are...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Difficult one this. I dont think it is about the swinging site or the life style, as somebody pointed out earlier this could happen anywhere that two people meet and attachments are formed in one person not necessarily reciprocated by the other. What is needed I guess I an element of decency and tact by the person who does not want the involvement in order not to hurt the other person. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The guy is on a no strings attached web site yet he's wrong for not reciprocating feelings and is a bad guy?

Seems a tad unfair...he's had one hour to digest info that the op has given lots of thought and taken advice on before commiting to, not unrealistic that he may wish for the same courtesy?

Hope he's not reading this....

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By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"The guy is on a no strings attached web site yet he's wrong for not reciprocating feelings and is a bad guy?

Seems a tad unfair...he's had one hour to digest info that the op has given lots of thought and taken advice on before commiting to, not unrealistic that he may wish for the same courtesy?

Hope he's not reading this...."

I think you have hit the nail on the head with this one. Every one still has a choice mind but he might not be too impressed if he reads this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The guy is on a no strings attached web site yet he's wrong for not reciprocating feelings and is a bad guy?

Agreed it is swing site, not a dating site and that must be borne in mind - just think that when a reply hopefully comes...it would be nice to think it was tactful.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A reply came n he was a gent till the end as he always is. Yes its a shame he doesnt want to act on how he feels but thats life i guess

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"A reply came n he was a gent till the end as he always is. Yes its a shame he doesnt want to act on how he feels but thats life i guess

good that he was lovely.. wish you both well in your seperate paths xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A reply came n he was a gent till the end as he always is. Yes its a shame he doesnt want to act on how he feels but thats life i guess

That is - although perhaps not the desired outcome for you - after all a good way forward - and becuase he has eben the gent you said he was...maybe you can put closure on the matter without being hurt xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

hugs...

((()))

(is it just me that thinks bracket hugs look like vaginas?)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/09/10 00:11:11]

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Well if it wasnt what he wanted, he still could have been nice about it.

Read up a few. I think he was.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lmao

didnt see that,

good man

wonder if he fancys a shag now

joke)))

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A reply came n he was a gent till the end as he always is. Yes its a shame he doesnt want to act on how he feels but thats life i guess

yay least he replied in a decent fashion, onwards and upwards and may you both have fun seperately after alll it's a swinging site, just enjoy yourselves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Even tho are last meet he admitted that it wasnt just sex he was making love to me.

HELP!"

Hmmm, I don't understand why he would say this to you if all he wanted was sex - that is going to plant ideas in your mind and lead you on to think he might want more.

Ok so he's not wrong not to reciprocate the feelings but I think he was wrong to tell you that.

I'm sorry he hasn't responded hun (((hugs)))

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooops just seen he did respond, I'm sorry he didn't feel the same way xx

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I see you got your responce.

Just now move on and carry on meeting people maybe other than him and either he will realise what he has missed out on or he will not be bothered.

God luck honey xx

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By *undebigaryMan
over a year ago

dundee

"Im wondering if this has ever happened to anyone. Having met and play with a single guy on here a few times, a couple of weeks ago i caught myself thinking about him romanticly.

Now i know that it was ment to be all fun and even myself i was quiet taken a back by what i was thinking

HELP!"
I would just go for it.an if he made that comment about making love hes maybe trying to gauge your reaction.take it slow tho x

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By *undebigaryMan
over a year ago

dundee

" Even tho are last meet he admitted that it wasnt just sex he was making love to me.

HELP!

Hmmm, I don't understand why he would say this to you if all he wanted was sex - that is going to plant ideas in your mind and lead you on to think he might want more.

Ok so he's not wrong not to reciprocate the feelings but I think he was wrong to tell you that.

I'm sorry he hasn't responded hun (((hugs)))"
thats exactly what i was thinking.you have said it better than i could have tho.lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I met a guy back in may 2009, i had feelings for him, and luckily he felt the same, we r now together and engaged

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I met a guy back in may 2009, i had feelings for him, and luckily he felt the same, we r now together and engaged

That is a lovely outcome - does not happen very often on a swing site so congratulations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hugs...

((()))

(is it just me that thinks bracket hugs look like vaginas?)

Don't be stooopid. It's an onion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had the exactly same thing happen to me. I told him and he basically said he was grateful for my honesty. Needless to say I don't think he felt the same way. It's a difficult one. I think if it happens again I'd do exactly the same. Honestly is the only way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive got a couple of shirts that need ironing

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Im sorry that it didnt work for you, but i still think it was best coming clean. If you had carried on seeing him your feelings would of developed further and you would of got more hurt. Good luckxxkarenxx

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