FabSwingers.com forum: I Know I Can Be a Bit Naïve, But...

By *erbyDalesCpl OP Couple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

...can someone explain the concept of 'wanting a swinging partner'?

You're a single man; after months of hard work and perseverance you finally find a woman willing to meet you, yet your first thought is:

"great, now I can trade her in for something better"?

Or is it just a job-advert for the trapeze?

Mr ddc

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Do you view your swinging as trading in for better then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im not sure i get what you are asking -

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

A man can meet people but he looking forbade partner to swing with at the same time in my opinion. To me swinging is about meeting different people, it would he nice to be comfortable enough with someone to make it longer term but we wouldn't look on it as trading up. Or have I misunderstood?

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"im not sure i get what you are asking -

Me neither.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"im not sure i get what you are asking -

Me neither."

im wondering what mr ddc thinks swinging is

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By *erbyDalesCpl OP Couple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"Do you view your swinging as trading in for better then?"

Oh-oh, minefield!

Nope, nothing could be better. But sharing new experiences is fun.

(Phew)

I think you miss my point, which was more to do with birds in bushes, and hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they wish to keep shagging around and if she is into it too every ones getting fun. But if the woman is just looking for that one man she will know its not him . lol

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By *erbyDalesCpl OP Couple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"im not sure i get what you are asking -

It's just something that pops into my head whenever there is a thread from a single man seeking someone to go wife-swapping with him.

Coupled with my own particular sense of humour, which some still don't get!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's nothing to do with trading. Some people want a swinging partner so they can share mutual sexual interests with others.

Say I had a swinging partner. Sleeping with her would be incredibly fun because we would more the likely have to same outlook and fantasies with. But we also love the idea of swinging, so sharing each other with others is fuelling that fantasy more.

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

I think I get what op is saying, it happens all the time that you meet a guy a couple of times then he starts wanting to meet couples with you or asking you to find another woman for ffm.... Just feels like they want to use you to open doors for other meets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want a swinging partner. A male one. I want this as I like to play in a 4 sometimes, this way would give me opportunity to do so.

I don't want a relationship as at the moment I haven't enough time! So this works for me! It depends on agenda I guess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I get what op is saying, it happens all the time that you meet a guy a couple of times then he starts wanting to meet couples with you or asking you to find another woman for ffm.... Just feels like they want to use you to open doors for other meets

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

Tenbury Wells

Fact as proven by many single women on sites such as this

Men get middle to small amounts of actual meets on the whole

Single women get as many as they can deal with offered every day all day

So the man thinks

I'll have some of what she's having by tagging onto her

It's a ploy to meet others simple

I'm not saying they all do it

But a high percentage try

That's my experience and I was in this site from 2003-2009

Good luck ing them out

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Do you view your swinging as trading in for better then?

Oh-oh, minefield!

Nope, nothing could be better. But sharing new experiences is fun.

(Phew)

I think you miss my point, which was more to do with birds in bushes, and hands

I don't think you're naive but I do think you're missing the point. If a man wants a swinging partner it could mean one of many things, he might just want cheaper entry to clubs, he might find the

idea of a four way swap a turn on, he might like ffm or mmf, or any one of loads more reasons.

I love your avatar by the way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get what your on about.. Which is quite scary

I saw the post this morning and thought Why ?

Gullible Gimp

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Do you view your swinging as trading in for better then?

Oh-oh, minefield!

Nope, nothing could be better. But sharing new experiences is fun.

(Phew)

I think you miss my point, which was more to do with birds in bushes, and hands

I don't think I was the only one to miss it lol

Why is it trading in when a single guy wants to swing with a regular buddy but not when you do it?

When I was single I partnered up with a few fuck buddies but we weren't exclusive. It just meant we were able to look for threesomes and moresomes with each other. Some couples don't like meeting fuck buddy couples because they don't believe there is as strong a connection between them which is their prerogative but I think they are wrong. My fuck buddies and I were constantly checking we were ok and would never go ahead with any situation either of us were uncomfortable with.

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By *erbyDalesCpl OP Couple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"I get what your on about.. Which is quite scary

I saw the post this morning and thought Why ?

Gullible Gimp"

Thank you!

I was thinking I was going to have to call for Tina to come rescue me with one of her forms!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I suppose if I had a swinging partner it would open more doors for sure. As a single bi guy who's 52 and smokes, there aren't a hell of a lot of them open anyway

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I get what your on about.. Which is quite scary

I saw the post this morning and thought Why ?

Gullible Gimp"

Oh! Is this referring to a particular situation? No wonder I don't understand

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get what your on about.. Which is quite scary

I saw the post this morning and thought Why ?

Gullible Gimp

Thank you!

I was thinking I was going to have to call for Tina to come rescue me with one of her forms!

Gimps top tip.

I order the Forms in bulk it saves on postage and it helps Tina keep on top of things

Gimpus

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

So! Is anyone going to give a brief idea without dropping themselves in it?

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

But isn't that the purpose of swinging? "

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

Tenbury Wells

"Do you view your swinging as trading in for better then?

Oh-oh, minefield!

Nope, nothing could be better. But sharing new experiences is fun.

(Phew)

I think you miss my point, which was more to do with birds in bushes, and hands

I don't think I was the only one to miss it lol

Why is it trading in when a single guy wants to swing with a regular buddy but not when you do it?

Hello miss Evie

You and I have met so we know each other a little

I totally get what you do and fair enough

I'm slightly different

I'll go with a man to a club, regularly if we both want to, but I meet up and have sex with so few couples that I now say we effectively enter a club as two singles so that

A you get in for a better price

B we can have fun in a swingers venue

C you can introduce yourself and have fun with as many people as you want without fear of me being possessive, but then so can I

Hope that makes sense

And I do also prefer to play wirh actual couples not fb couples because I feel more safe and secure that no one's actual other half isn't going to appear, maybe having followed them.

This happened to me once and I was told to, not even asked, to hide in the wardrobe.

Suffice to say that I just walked out and left them to their deceit

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By *eliciouslyNastyMan
over a year ago

London

I don't really see what difference it makes...

If it's a good thing for both involved then why not...

But.... You gotta love how supposedly free spirited people love to constrain themselves by rules...

Maybe deep down people need to be ruled?

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By *erbyDalesCpl OP Couple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

"So! Is anyone going to give a brief idea without dropping themselves in it? "

Actually I've just noticed my original post should have technically included the phrase "looking for" not "wanting".

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

Tenbury Wells

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks? "

That's my point exactly

Your sex life suddenly becomes just about what they want

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"So! Is anyone going to give a brief idea without dropping themselves in it? "

I assume it's to do with the thread about a guy from Hull looking for a swinging partner. I think it odd to advertise for one in that way, as if it doesn't matter who. All of my past ones have been guys I met frequently as singles but we decided to mic it up a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks? "

Understand that, but why would you feel used just because that is what the guy wants?

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

That's my point exactly

Your sex life suddenly becomes just about what they want "

Yep if I had a fiver for every guy who wanted to make a couple account I could retire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...can someone explain the concept of 'wanting a swinging partner'?

You're a single man; after months of hard work and perseverance you finally find a woman willing to meet you, yet your first thought is:

"great, now I can trade her in for something better"?

Or is it just a job-advert for the trapeze?

Mr ddc"

Sorry op , but this seems to be another example of couples seeing themselves as ssomewhat better than single guys .

You assume they have spent months finding the elusive meet and immediately want something better . This is not always the case . There are plenty of single guys who don't have any trouble getting meets and when they want a swinging partner they simply want to broaden their swinging experiences.

Nothing wrong with that - and there are just as many single women who want the same .

Not everyone is as lucky as couples like us who already have it .

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By *eliciouslyNastyMan
over a year ago

London

Another concept that amuses me...

Don't be afraid of people using you... If your strong you will always be used by others...

"Animals sidle up to the king of the jungle, cause the jungles a dangerous place"

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

Tenbury Wells

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

Understand that, but why would you feel used just because that is what the guy wants? "

You shouldn't

Simple

My profile states

Not looking for swinging partner EVER

I can get all the action I need by myself anyway so I don't need one

Lifts to clubs however are welcome lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So! Is anyone going to give a brief idea without dropping themselves in it?

Actually I've just noticed my original post should have technically included the phrase "looking for" not "wanting".

Right. My opinion? If a woman wants to partner up with a man as long as she they both want it I can't see a problem.

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By *afadaoMan
over a year ago

Staines

"It's nothing to do with trading. Some people want a swinging partner so they can share mutual sexual interests with others.

Ejay's nailed it from my perspective. Being single is being single - there are up side sides and down sides.

One of the down sides might be every day loneliness and the need for intimacy. So perhaps when these guys say swinging partner, perhaps they mean a regular partner that would like to join them in a swinging adventure.

I have found that it is quite tricky having been on here to have 'vanilla' dates. My thoughts invariably drift to how to broach the subject of a side of my life that I really enjoy and now find 'normal' - but that someone else may be horrified by!

I have met lots of lovely couples who are totally in love, totally committed to each other but swing. Without jealousy, without judgement. They have a great time but they go home together and they sleep together and they wake up together.

On the majority of occasions they were together already and then discovered swinging.

I for one would definitely never rule out meeting someone in this world with whom I shared something a bit more special, but with whom I could also swing. Very much easier said than done though.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

That's my point exactly

Your sex life suddenly becomes just about what they want "

Only if you agree to that dynamic surely.

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

Understand that, but why would you feel used just because that is what the guy wants? "

Because more often than not it's not about doing it with me but just wanting anyone to join up with, if I was meeting someone regularly and we both wanted it then it's a different situation

But as I said I've never had an interest in ffm or meeting other couples

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By *eliciouslyNastyMan
over a year ago

London

This is super common in all walks of life... People need a reason to see themselves as superior....

Couples often use the validation that they have a partner, as proof they are wanted, therefore better than a singleton.

We all do it though.... Just in different ways....

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By *ere-for-my-convenienceWoman
over a year ago

Tenbury Wells

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

That's my point exactly

Your sex life suddenly becomes just about what they want

Only if you agree to that dynamic surely."

It's not up for negotiation lol

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By *appyguy17Man
over a year ago

walthamstow

I know exactly where you're coming derby dales......

I've met a lovely girl on here and we are both happy at the moment......

Swinging can be interpereted in different ways...........

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By *erbyDalesCpl OP Couple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

Sorry op , but this seems to be another example of couples seeing themselves as ssomewhat better than single guys .

Nooooooo! It really isn't!

Gimp had it right.

It's just another example of someone being on at a different time to normal, and the daytime crowd not getting their sense of humour.

Quaking here in case someone spots my "I'm home alone" thread from last night!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry op , but this seems to be another example of couples seeing themselves as ssomewhat better than single guys .

Nooooooo! It really isn't!

Gimp had it right.

It's just another example of someone being on at a different time to normal, and the daytime crowd not getting their sense of humour.

Quaking here in case someone spots my "I'm home alone" thread from last night!

Which I thought was hilarious, I enjoy your posts ddc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But isn't that the purpose of swinging?

Not for me, I wasn't into meeting other couples when I was a couple or ffm, so why would I want to do it with every random guy who asks?

That's my point exactly

Your sex life suddenly becomes just about what they want

Only if you agree to that dynamic surely.

It's not up for negotiation lol "

Yes it is, no one can use you or manipulate you without your agreement whether it be complicit or otherwise.

I do think that somewhere along the line you seem to have decided that all single guys are trying to manipulate people and situations for their own ends and that simply isn't true

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