FabSwingers.com forum: You know when you're getting old when...........

By *win Peaks OP Couple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

You're watching a porn film and you think 'that bed looks comfy'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You start wearing your coat on a night out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U only want sex 3 times a day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And think "They'll catch their death out there with no clothes on"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pause the porn to make a cuppa

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By *anatee175Couple
over a year ago

Sunderland

When you sneeze and fart at the same time.

Claire

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By *iverview1Couple
over a year ago

gourock

you become a gran

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Make more groans when bending over to take a cock then you do actually taking the cock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have to have a nap before having sex before falling asleep again!

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By *win Peaks OP Couple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

"You have to have a nap before having sex before falling asleep again!"

As long as you don't need a knap half way through.

Dave

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

When you are a lass wearing the skimiest outfit ever on a cold winter's night and you think....

Get some bloody clothes on then!

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

When you're telling someone that you once ran a nightclub and then you realise it was ten years before they were born.

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By *issyblue321Woman
over a year ago

hove

When you're really looking forward to going on cam in the chat room but when the time comes have an early night instead ,,,,,

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By *verysmileMan
over a year ago

Canterbury

You wonder if you are working tomorrow before making a decision to go out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the mind is still willing but your cocks stays soft

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was just perving on a profile and realised that I was 19 when he was born

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

When you can rememb.....

What was the question again?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you lie about your age on here.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you buy a new Hoover and can't wait to test it out

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

You like an afternoon snooze

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

When The Mrs shouts 'Super Pussy' just as she strips and you choose the soup

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you feel horney but go no desire for sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You like an afternoon snooze "

i like an afternoon snooze too im not old x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you see a pretty girl and think "I wonder what your mum's like?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once woke my wife up to point out an antique bureau exactly like one I wanted from a shop I had seen, it was being used as a prop in a porno.

I paused it and we had a good look at it. Very nice red leather writing surface and plenty of drawers.

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By *ouplekinkCouple
over a year ago

kink town

When the two new blokes at work were born after I started work here!

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

When you worry about which bin day it is, 3 days before you have to put one out.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

You thought you had commented on the thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She gets naked and you worry she'll catch her death.....

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

... you have to scroll down to find your birth year

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By *igandanneCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

When you think mmmm the mother looks sexy too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You spend most of the year saving up for birthday cake candles.

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By *afadaoMan
over a year ago

Staines

When you take a sip from a cuppa and say "Oooh, that hit the spot"

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

i have just had a friend send me a clip from the classic film "house party" (all the kids in london of a certain age will know what an epic film that was)

it was released 25 years ago!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you have a comment to share on a thread titled, you know you're getting old when...

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"i have just had a friend send me a clip from the classic film "house party" (all the kids in london of a certain age will know what an epic film that was)

it was released 25 years ago!!!!!!!"

It's that with Kid n Play?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your filling in an online form and you have to keep scrolling further down for your date of birth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You buy a piar of cords...

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"i have just had a friend send me a clip from the classic film "house party" (all the kids in london of a certain age will know what an epic film that was)

it was released 25 years ago!!!!!!!

It's that with Kid n Play?"

yep....how bloody depressing... thats like the cult film from growing up...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You go upstairs and forget what you went up for.

You'd rather slip into your fluffy dressing gown than, sexy underwear.

You look in the mirror and see your mother staring back.

You get mega excited... When it's a good blowy, day yes I'll get loads of washing done today!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i have just had a friend send me a clip from the classic film "house party" (all the kids in london of a certain age will know what an epic film that was)

it was released 25 years ago!!!!!!!

It's that with Kid n Play?

yep....how bloody depressing... thats like the cult film from growing up... "

National Lampoons Animal House is on catch up..... soon tempted

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By *em4ejacWoman
over a year ago

Cougarville

When people that are contacting you on here are 10 years younger than your kids or 10 years older than you grand kid .

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"i have just had a friend send me a clip from the classic film "house party" (all the kids in london of a certain age will know what an epic film that was)

it was released 25 years ago!!!!!!!

It's that with Kid n Play?

yep....how bloody depressing... thats like the cult film from growing up... "

That's just reminded me of Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You buy a piar of cords..."

I'm the dope man yeah boy wear corduroy, money up to here but unemployed.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And think "They'll catch their death out there with no clothes on""

Do it all the time

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By *onguetastic1Man
over a year ago

Castleford

Eyeing up the neighbours 18 year old daughter and then realising you're 38 and must appear to be a dirty old man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You get excited about using a new fabric softener

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By *ighclassfunMan
over a year ago

Cheshire

"When you're really looking forward to going on cam in the chat room but when the time comes have an early night instead ,,,,,"

Haha - made me smile

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By *win Peaks OP Couple
over a year ago

Northamptonshire

When you find out you're older than some of your managers parents at work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When it tskes 3 days to recover from a night out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She you Tut and glare at young ones lack of Clothing...

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By *hooter McGavinMan
over a year ago

Exeter

It takes you longer to recover from doing something than it actually took you to do the thing or things yours recovering from

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you know its time you were in your nice tidy shed starting your onions off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you know its time you were in your nice tidy shed starting your onions off.

made me giggle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When some young pup at work tries to tell you something you had already done and forgotten about before they were even born

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By *adyGardenWoman
over a year ago

LONDON (se)

"When you take a sip from a cuppa and say "Oooh, that hit the spot""

Bloody hell that means I was old about 20 years ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When a lad at work is nervous about his driving test and you realise I was driving before he was born

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when your so looking forward to that well earned night out ....

then you think its wet n windy il just curl up with my book (again) instead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your chattin to a hot girl in the pub an ask her name.... Then you suddenly realise you were out the night her father celebrated the same girls birth lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when you realise the two lads you are working with, and their combined age is younger than you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"when you realise the two lads you are working with, and their combined age is younger than you

Experience will always trump youthful naivety

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"when you realise the two lads you are working with, and their combined age is younger than you

Experience will always trump youthful naivety "

Jesus thats a bit philosophical

and no I didn't spell check cos they taught us to spell when I went to skool

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By *uzzy NavelWoman
over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

"You go upstairs and forget what you went up for.

You'd rather slip into your fluffy dressing gown than, sexy underwear.

You look in the mirror and see your mother staring back.

You get mega excited... When it's a good blowy, day yes I'll get loads of washing done today!

Love this!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You go upstairs and forget what you went up for.

You'd rather slip into your fluffy dressing gown than, sexy underwear.

You look in the mirror and see your mother staring back.

You get mega excited... When it's a good blowy, day yes I'll get loads of washing done today!

Love this!!!

I saw some washing out yesterday and thought it's too cold it'll never dry in this

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

When you find out the original Karate Kid is 52 years old.

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By *p4funCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

"You start wearing your coat on a night out."

yep lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your still trying to put your socks on standing up and spend most of the time wobbling round or falling over

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you find out the original Karate Kid is 52 years old.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your look at as festival lineup you use to go to (reading) and don't recognise any of the bands on the linup.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you almost buy the nice pleated over the knee skirt with the elasticated waist like your nan wore from the charity shop

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By *ighland_RoseCouple
over a year ago

Brigadoon

When you can't wait to get home and put the electric blanket on and gather all your cats around you and drink tea. Ah bliss.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have to have a nap before having sex before falling asleep again!"

sex slumber

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When the two new blokes at work were born after I started work here!

I know that feeling, one is 19, the other just turned 21.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the girl at work you fancy and wondering whether to ask out is talking about something to do with years gone by and I mention I can remember that when it happened so could be old enough to be her dad, she asks me old I am I tell and she says "so's my dad...."

Now maybe there's a conundrum for the next thread....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and when you see someone from a distance that you admire and then realise that before you take that admiration to another level you would need to ask to see their birth certificate....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You wake up in the morning feeling more knackered than when you went to bed.

Or is that just me?

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By *odramafunCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire/staffordshire

You think Kik is what you do to a ball

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You go upstairs and forget what you went up for.

You'd rather slip into your fluffy dressing gown than, sexy underwear.

You look in the mirror and see your mother staring back.

You get mega excited... When it's a good blowy, day yes I'll get loads of washing done today!

Love this!!!

I saw some washing out yesterday and thought it's too cold it'll never dry in this

oh crap PP not you too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You go upstairs and forget what you went up for.

You'd rather slip into your fluffy dressing gown than, sexy underwear.

You look in the mirror and see your mother staring back.

You get mega excited... When it's a good blowy, day yes I'll get loads of washing done today!

Love this!!!

Close to home aye?

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By *lactontogMan
over a year ago

Clacton on Sea

"You're watching a porn film and you think 'that bed looks comfy'"

I shoot porn and think that,

I look at the decor / layouts of rooms and think about what's for dinner later as i go into auto mode...yep I'm getting old lol.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"It takes you longer to recover from doing something than it actually took you to do the thing or things yours recovering from "

It takes him all night to do what he used to do all night...

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"When you take a sip from a cuppa and say "Oooh, that hit the spot""

I have a theory about that - I never drank tea, always coffee, until I hit 40 or something and my body said 'Tea, I need tea now!!"

It's a craving for the anti-oxidants I reckon - tea, dark chocolate, and red wine!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An old fella I used to work with always said at his age you should never trust a fart and never waste an erection ha ha

God rest his soul

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

your out of a lot of younger women and couples age range preference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you lie about your age on here.....

When you stop lying about your age as it will all come out in the wash anyway

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When you could have legally given birth to a 34 year old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your knees creak going up the stairs more than the stairs do

When you are working with someone who was born after you passed your driving test

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By *ikki ShooterTV/TS
over a year ago

Epsom

"When you're telling someone that you once ran a nightclub and then you realise it was ten years before they were born.

So you're peter stringfellow.... nice to meet you xx

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By *ighland_RoseCouple
over a year ago

Brigadoon

"When you could have legally given birth to a 34 year old

Ouch!

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"When you could have legally given birth to a 34 year old

Fookin ell

bet he had a right hunger on when he popped out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you spend lunch time flicking between Fab and the news...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When your still trying to put your socks on standing up and spend most of the time wobbling round or falling over

I have to sit down now to do it

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By *ercy the Park KeeperMan
over a year ago

Chester

You remember porn with hirsute crotches.

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By *ust_for_laughsCouple
over a year ago

Hinckley

When you start University and realise you actually lived through what the rest of your cohort considers to be history!

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By *urreyfun2008Man
over a year ago

East Grinstead

When you start to worry whether Saga has you on their mailing list, but you are still looking for last minute breaks to Ibiza.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your bollocks hang lower than your cock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you start University and realise you actually lived through what the rest of your cohort considers to be history!"

This too. Definitely this!!

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By *ust_for_laughsCouple
over a year ago

Hinckley

"When you start University and realise you actually lived through what the rest of your cohort considers to be history!

This too. Definitely this!!

Not only that but you're older than the majority of your lecturers and your fellow students are only a few years older than your grandkids and considerably younger than your kids!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you start University and realise you actually lived through what the rest of your cohort considers to be history!

This too. Definitely this!!

Not only that but you're older than the majority of your lecturers and your fellow students are only a few years older than your grandkids and considerably younger than your kids!

When I was at uni I was like the young kids' 'mum away from home' sigh

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple
over a year ago

Derbyshire

When, trying to 'get down with the kids', you mis-read the car DAB radio text, and say "I really like that new song by DJ Fresh Feet"

Mr ddc

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

when you admire whiter than white teeth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going to the pub on a Saturday night and thinking that it is to loud and don't understand what the music is playing.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When you tell people your age and they all start clapping

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You get messages from women young enough to be your daughter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you know you only have one shot so you make it last as long as you can

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral

I think it is most of these and more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i have just had a friend send me a clip from the classic film "house party" (all the kids in london of a certain age will know what an epic film that was)

it was released 25 years ago!!!!!!!

It's that with Kid n Play?"
what's worse is that Ferris Buellers day off is nearly 30 years old...Anyone Anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You put your slippers on as soon as you get home.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

...you have a violet goatee

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