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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol" I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger" Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!! | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger" Not sociable at all. Share the love is my motto | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!!" If you want I'll stalk you for a while and send everyone you met a nice 'she's mine' pm? | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp"Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first   | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!! If you want I'll stalk you for a while and send everyone you met a nice 'she's mine' pm?" Would you?!?!?!?! You are fantastic!!!!!! Go for your life!!!!!! | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first "Yer a Woman Know ya place 
Gimp | |||
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"how do you know it was pissing up the lamp post message? " Because they could see from our veris we'd enjoyed the meet's company so were obviously trying to stir. From what I can gather, they haven't blocked our meet, so I can't really see what issues they have other than wanting us to not meet the meet again | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!! If you want I'll stalk you for a while and send everyone you met a nice 'she's mine' pm? Would you?!?!?!?! You are fantastic!!!!!! Go for your life!!!!!!" OK, but only if you do the same for me  | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first
Yer a Woman
Don't make me use my muscles.... I ain't 'fraid of you or your million veris!!!!!!
Know ya place
Gimp" | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first
Yer a Woman
Don't make me use my muscles.... I ain't 'fraid of you or your million veris!!!!!!
Know ya place
Gimp"Yer Yer bring it on, Il set me Woman on ya n She will chew on ya Kneecaps
Gimp | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!! If you want I'll stalk you for a while and send everyone you met a nice 'she's mine' pm? Would you?!?!?!?! You are fantastic!!!!!! Go for your life!!!!!! OK, but only if you do the same for me "Absolutely!!!!!! | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first
Yer a Woman
Don't make me use my muscles.... I ain't 'fraid of you or your million veris!!!!!!
Know ya place
Gimp
Yer Yer bring it on, Il set me Woman on ya n She will chew on ya Kneecaps
Gimp"You hide behind yer woman..... Typical | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first
Yer a Woman
Don't make me use my muscles.... I ain't 'fraid of you or your million veris!!!!!!
Know ya place
Gimp
Yer Yer bring it on, Il set me Woman on ya n She will chew on ya Kneecaps
Gimp
You hide behind yer woman..... Typical"Im a lover not a fighter, Anyway thats what women are for, Send em into battle while us blokes stand round cheering on n looking up skirts | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first
Yer a Woman
Don't make me use my muscles.... I ain't 'fraid of you or your million veris!!!!!!
Know ya place
Gimp
Yer Yer bring it on, Il set me Woman on ya n She will chew on ya Kneecaps
Gimp
You hide behind yer woman..... Typical
Im a lover not a fighter, Anyway thats what women are for, Send em into battle while us blokes stand round cheering on n looking up skirts "Yellow bellied perv | |||
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"Oooh! I had someone slating me to others, private messageing folk that I'm friends with! Does that count? Or not....as I am a bit of a w****r at times to so it could just be that......." I've not had that, not that I know anyway. I guess its all part of the fun! | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first
Yer a Woman
Don't make me use my muscles.... I ain't 'fraid of you or your million veris!!!!!!
Know ya place
Gimp
Yer Yer bring it on, Il set me Woman on ya n She will chew on ya Kneecaps
Gimp
You hide behind yer woman..... Typical
Im a lover not a fighter, Anyway thats what women are for, Send em into battle while us blokes stand round cheering on n looking up skirts
Yellow bellied perv "Errrrm Yep
Gimp | |||
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"Men I've rejected have messaged men I've met to try and discuss me. The men I meet tell me though, and report it. It's creepy. Two of the men I've verified have been refused meets by couples/women, and having met me was the reason. Some people are weird. "  It's totally bizarre. It doesn't make me dislike the person they're trying to turn me against - if they can badmouth people, it makes me wonder what they might be saying about me to other people | |||
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"Men I've rejected have messaged men I've met to try and discuss me. The men I meet tell me though, and report it. It's creepy. Two of the men I've verified have been refused meets by couples/women, and having met me was the reason. Some people are weird. " I've had men who can't get through my message filters message guys I've met to get them to ask me to message them... | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!!" Yeah just a word of warning, stay away from all the men who post on the forum as they're all diseased and your falula will turn green (and secretly they are all mine...MINE!!) {laughs manically} | |||
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"Oooh! I had someone slating me to others, private messageing folk that I'm friends with! Does that count? Or not....as I am a bit of a w****r at times to so it could just be that....... I've not had that, not that I know anyway. I guess its all part of the fun!" I've been forwarded screenshots of stuff they'd said about me....ah well, its all part of the shits and giggles on here ... Who was it that once said there's only one thing worse than being talked about? | |||
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"OK so what is the reference about? Clueless and not ashamed to admit it lol I think its where a previous meet of the person you're meeting messages you telling you to 'stay away', or 'they're mine' sort of thing. Posessive crap like that, very antiswinger Ohhhhhh right. Wow cool!!!!!! I want one!!!!! Yeah just a word of warning, stay away from all the men who post on the forum as they're all diseased and your falula will turn green (and secretly they are all mine...MINE!!) {laughs manically} "They told me it would go yellow!!!!! Keep em all if they wanna lie about somwthing important like a colour scheme | |||
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"I got a message from a guy saying I had let him down after I had a meet with an existing contact. He was peeved as he had "put the effort in.. " I then got blocked. Id only exchanged messages a few days.. So yes it happens...
"Just goes to show that, to many people - it never really is 'just sex' S x | |||
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I don't display my veris though, so no one really knows who I meet. | |||
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Sx | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned!" So are you suggesting that anyone wanting to meet someone you have met should message you to ask if that's ok? | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned!" I know exactly what you're saying hun but that's more appropriate for the poly world than the swinging world. Within swinging, people expect to have no ties, no strings attached and therefore remain 100% independent. Poly on the other hand, you would want to tell your partner(s) everything so you could have their blessing. crystal x | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned!" Huh? | |||
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"They are more common than you think. I've had a few. Never from fem/fem meets tho. Usually from females who are into males I would never touch with a barge pole, but have an interest in me. In fact I actively encourage my meets to contact friends of mine. Lots more fun that way. Think the pissing up a lamp post attitude smacks of insecurity and is against the whole swinging ethos. Those people should take their insecurities to a dating site instead." Lol
The message came from an M/F couple we'd once met. That we'd not been in contact with since meeting them. Not for any particular reason.
I had noticed though that they are on our 'looked at me' quite regularly.
I can't be certain, but I think it was from the female half. Moaning about our meet yet not blocking messages from the meet they/he/she proclaim to detest... odd.
S x | |||
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"Oooh! I had someone slating me to others, private messageing folk that I'm friends with! Does that count? Or not....as I am a bit of a w****r at times to so it could just be that......." New pic...slobber. | |||
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"how do you know it was pissing up the lamp post message? Because they could see from our veris we'd enjoyed the meet's company so were obviously trying to stir. From what I can gather, they haven't blocked our meet, so I can't really see what issues they have other than wanting us to not meet the meet again" More fish in the sea of fab. I would give them a miss ... if people get silly over small things they are not for me . | |||
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"Oooh! I had someone slating me to others, private messageing folk that I'm friends with! Does that count? Or not....as I am a bit of a w****r at times to so it could just be that......." I've had this too! One or two ladies on the club circuit who contact my friends to 'warn' them that everyone else has got it wrong and i'm a horrible, man-stealing bitch really! They tend to be 'don't like her- like me!' messages. I fend them very odd but they've had no success so far, to my knowledge. Ah well - nowt queerer that folk!! | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned!" I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with | |||
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"how do you know it was pissing up the lamp post message? Because they could see from our veris we'd enjoyed the meet's company so were obviously trying to stir. From what I can gather, they haven't blocked our meet, so I can't really see what issues they have other than wanting us to not meet the meet again More fish in the sea of fab. I would give them a miss ... if people get silly over small things they are not for me ." Yep true. The message came from a couple we'd met (had fun with) ages ago though, had no contact with since and had no intention of meeting again. Yet they felt compelled into sending a message badmouthing a recent meet (who's company we'd really enjoyed). They've deleted my replies so obviously don't want the other half of their couple to see that they're so hung up on the meet we met lol S x | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with " | |||
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Must have "Home-wrecker" written on my forehead or something.
- Amy. x | |||
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"Never on here, I get it a lot face-to-face in the vanilla world though where you can be talking to someone and all of a sudden their Missus starts giving you dirty looks and starts draping themselves all over them and trying to chew their faces off mid-conversation.
Must have "Home-wrecker" written on my forehead or something.
- Amy. x"Ha ha yes know exactly what you mean - that's so cringey. Just makes me want to laugh S x | |||
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"Oooh! I had someone slating me to others, private messageing folk that I'm friends with! Does that count? Or not....as I am a bit of a w****r at times to so it could just be that....... I've had this too! One or two ladies on the club circuit who contact my friends to 'warn' them that everyone else has got it wrong and i'm a horrible, man-stealing bitch really! They tend to be 'don't like her- like me!' messages. I fend them very odd but they've had no success so far, to my knowledge. Ah well - nowt queerer that folk!! "Lol me too. Tho how I can be a man stealer when I like the ladies more than K d Lang is a bit | |||
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"Never on here, I get it a lot face-to-face in the vanilla world though where you can be talking to someone and all of a sudden their Missus starts giving you dirty looks and starts draping themselves all over them and trying to chew their faces off mid-conversation.
Must have "Home-wrecker" written on my forehead or something.
- Amy. x"No Amy - you have it written accross those highly impreasive boobs! | |||
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"I'm jealous now, I sooo want to be vilified
Gimp
Get to the back of the queue!!!!! I'm first "erm HELLO I am now wait your turn | |||
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"Oooh! I had someone slating me to others, private messageing folk that I'm friends with! Does that count? Or not....as I am a bit of a w****r at times to so it could just be that....... I've had this too! One or two ladies on the club circuit who contact my friends to 'warn' them that everyone else has got it wrong and i'm a horrible, man-stealing bitch really! They tend to be 'don't like her- like me!' messages. I fend them very odd but they've had no success so far, to my knowledge. Ah well - nowt queerer that folk!!
Lol me too. Tho how I can be a man stealer when I like the ladies more than K d Lang is a bit "I was mystified - until I was told by people who know them that it was just plain old-fashioned jealousy! Guess it'a the same with you hun - i-m sure we'll both get over it!! Thing is i'm not remotely jealous or psesessive myself - if someone asked me which of my meets were well worth contacting i'd tell them with pleasure! In my opinion lamp-posts have no place in the swinging world!! xx | |||
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"Never on here, I get it a lot face-to-face in the vanilla world though where you can be talking to someone and all of a sudden their Missus starts giving you dirty looks and starts draping themselves all over them and trying to chew their faces off mid-conversation.
Must have "Home-wrecker" written on my forehead or something.
- Amy. x"Amy you can wreck my home anytime you want x | |||
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"I find anysort of behaviour like that really pathetic and immature,id tell whoever was stirring it up the same and i'd be put off from having anything to do with them again I wonder if they realise how ridiculous they have made themselves look?"
I think they regretted it as soon as they sent the messages, as they've deleted our replies, so most likely they've deleted their side of the conversation too - we still have them though ha!
It was always unlikely we'd have met them again - but it's a definite 'no' from us now
S x | |||
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"how do you know it was pissing up the lamp post message? " Because he sent a picture pissing up a lamp post | |||
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"how do you know it was pissing up the lamp post message? Because he sent a picture pissing up a lamp post "  | |||
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"We've had our first 'pissing up a lamp post' message! They had the audacity to give their view on a meet we had, issues they've had with them etc. I remained neutral. How common are pissing up a lamp post messages on here I wonder " Maybe they knew something about who you had both met that you didn't, I don't know why they would bother to message you about it though. | |||
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"We've had our first 'pissing up a lamp post' message! They had the audacity to give their view on a meet we had, issues they've had with them etc. I remained neutral. How common are pissing up a lamp post messages on here I wonder Maybe they knew something about who you had both met that you didn't, I don't know why they would bother to message you about it though." Yes especially when they could see we'd all had a good time (which is the problem i think). We dont know them well enough to care about who they meet, even if we did, we would still leave them to make their own conclusions. We certainly wouldn't try and stir. We'd just think good luck to them. S x | |||
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"Now I know the phrase that goes with the situations I've experienced. Thanks." Lol it's a very apt phrase. Seems quite a few on here need to try and intimidate to mark 'their' territory. Always makes me laugh when i hear it though as i get a silly vision of some daft dog cocking it's leg! | |||
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"Never on here, I get it a lot face-to-face in the vanilla world though where you can be talking to someone and all of a sudden their Missus starts giving you dirty looks and starts draping themselves all over them and trying to chew their faces off mid-conversation.
Must have "Home-wrecker" written on my forehead or something.
- Amy. x
Ha ha yes know exactly what you mean - that's so cringey.
Just makes me want to laugh
S x"I kind of take it as a compliment, but at the same time I find it sad that they feel so insecure. x | |||
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"We've had our first 'pissing up a lamp post' message! They had the audacity to give their view on a meet we had, issues they've had with them etc. I remained neutral. How common are pissing up a lamp post messages on here I wonder " If someone slags you off for meeting someone else, I can see them marking you as their territory. If they slag off someone you have met are they offering themselves as your territory? This is all umchartered territory for me... If someone I had met got a snotogram from someone else I met saying hands off, I would see that as lamp post pissing. Also highly unlikely... | |||
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"I got a message from a guy saying I had let him down after I had a meet with an existing contact. He was peeved as he had "put the effort in.. " I then got blocked. Id only exchanged messages a few days.. So yes it happens...
Just goes to show that, to many people - it never really is 'just sex'
S x" exactly this! Some show some very unsavory traits | |||
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"We've had our first 'pissing up a lamp post' message! They had the audacity to give their view on a meet we had, issues they've had with them etc. I remained neutral. How common are pissing up a lamp post messages on here I wonder If someone slags you off for meeting someone else, I can see them marking you as their territory. If they slag off someone you have met are they offering themselves as your territory? This is all umchartered territory for me... If someone I had met got a snotogram from someone else I met saying hands off, I would see that as lamp post pissing. Also highly unlikely..." It's all very bizarre, unsettling and unsavoury, not at all what we came on here for. I'm sure entanglements are inevitable somewhere along the line on here and to be expected sadly S x | |||
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"Is this watersports gone wrong? "lmfao! | |||
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"I got a message from a guy saying I had let him down after I had a meet with an existing contact. He was peeved as he had "put the effort in.. " I then got blocked. Id only exchanged messages a few days.. So yes it happens...
Just goes to show that, to many people - it never really is 'just sex'
S x exactly this! Some show some very unsavory traits " True, unfortunately | |||
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"I once had a guy I'd already met, set up a totally different profile ( yes I could tell it was him!), message me asking for my opinion on the username he'd had when I met him from my meet as he had a 'female friend' interested! Not sure what he was hoping to achieve, but seeing as he asked.... I did rather go to town on the scathing just for the hell of it! " | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with "It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?' I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk. | |||
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"I can't say I've ever had one. I'm happy to share a nice man though " | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk. "You message a girl that might be getting serious with a guy you've been with - to ask if it's okay to still him? | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk.
You message a girl that might be getting serious with a guy you've been with - to ask if it's okay to still him?"*see him... | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk. "I think you're kidding around ha ha. Cause that's some scary shit right there | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk.
I think you're kidding around ha ha. Cause that's some scary shit right there " | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk. "I understand exactly what you're saying. It's the right thing to do if someone is actually involved in a relationship with another person that you obtain consent from all involved (much like how here you would expect people to check with both halves of a couple before you have a solo meet with one half). With NSA, swingers aren't perceived to be (unless otherwise stated) in any form of relationships with their meets. People on their verification list are people they've met - not people they necessarily have a relationship with. I think the other side of it is because of privacy. I can imagine there are people who wouldn't want anyone telling other people that they were meeting. It's nobody else's business. They have no obligation to tell anyone else what they are up to. Very few people here seem to understand the concept of poly relationships so your suggestion of messaging previous meets to obtain consent is not something many people here would have considered. You're right to do it if you're meeting one half of a couple to ensure you have consent of both parties but not to message previous meets. crystal | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk.
You message a girl that might be getting serious with a guy you've been with - to ask if it's okay to see him?"This is normal in poly relationships. For everyone to voice consent before anything happens. For example... if you met the male half of a couple, would you be happy just taking his word that the lady half was ok with it or would you want to hear it from her directly? crystal | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned!" Are you saying that if you want to meet a man you contact women who have verified him and ask if it's ok? How do you know who the main woman is? | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk.
You message a girl that might be getting serious with a guy you've been with - to ask if it's okay to see him?
This is normal in poly relationships. For everyone to voice consent before anything happens. For example... if you met the male half of a couple, would you be happy just taking his word that the lady half was ok with it or would you want to hear it from her directly?
crystal"We keep all our meets to fab. Not interested in their lives beyond fab. Whether that be hidden partner, whatever. They can tell us about their lives - but we are not concerned with it. We find that keeps things simpler all round. We only impart details, regards ourselves, conducive to a meet with intended meet. Polyamory? Nah - count me out | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! Are you saying that if you want to meet a man you contact women who have verified him and ask if it's ok? How do you know who the main woman is? " She's the one by the lamp post - pissing! Seriously if they are a couple yes. Via their couples profile. If they are singles - no. They are not property. It's not about manners. It's often about an imbalance in the 'relationship' and one person reading alot more into it. | |||
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"I think its courtesy to ask a potential meet's other partners if its okay to meet, it seems more proactive and more friendly, less like a little secret? I know its different for everyone and each meet, but asking the other partners if its okay has got to be better than receiving hate mail off them? I know if my main man was off seeing other women, it would be nice if they took the time to get in touch? Just out of courtesy... Maybe I'm just old fashioned! I think that's more than old fashioned, I this is touching on possessive. If I've met someone I'm not expecting anything more from them except to say hello! Anyone going around asking my old meets for permission is probably going to get met with
It's not so much every single meet you have and you need to ask every other person who has met them before before, It's more in a sense of ... I know a guy, and he's seeing another girl, and it's beyond casual sex, so to show I pose no threat and mean them no 'harm' I'd message the girl, and ask her if it were okay for me to meet the initial guy. It's not about possessiveness, it's about cordiality and niceness... surely it's better to head off the 'pissing on lamppost' messages, with a friendly 'hi, I'm x and so and so, and I'd like to meet up with y, how do you feel about that?'
I understand that the swinging world is very different to poly, and everyone is different, and everyone does things differently and that's awesome. I understand as well that there are different degrees of swinging, from anonymous encounters to full on sexual and romantic relationships formed out of these meets; everyone's different, different strokes for different folk.
You message a girl that might be getting serious with a guy you've been with - to ask if it's okay to see him?
This is normal in poly relationships. For everyone to voice consent before anything happens. For example... if you met the male half of a couple, would you be happy just taking his word that the lady half was ok with it or would you want to hear it from her directly?
crystal
We keep all our meets to fab. Not interested in their lives beyond fab. Whether that be hidden partner, whatever.
They can tell us about their lives - but we are not concerned with it.
We find that keeps things simpler all round.
We only impart details, regards ourselves, conducive to a meet with intended meet. Polyamory?
Nah - count me out " easy n simple for us too... Not wanting drama , or crap ... Some do thrive on it tho!! | |||
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