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Overcoming obstacles.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I've been thinking a lot lately about how Jez and I have changed and adapted to pursue this wonderful new world of swinging we have discovered.

New things we have been brave enough to try, we have taken to like a duck to water and totally love it. Things that we never even imagined we would do a year ago.

As the title say's, overcoming obstacles that allow us to enjoy what this life has to offer. If someone told us a year ago what we'd be doing now we would've wet ourselves laughing! The fact that I am bisexual was a shock at first but not for long. Must've been something there before but just didn't except it. I think so far that's the best bit for me.LOL Never in a million years did I see that one coming!

Explaining to the children why Mum and Dad have started going out together is another obstacle we've had to tackle. I've been home bringing up the children for 19yrs and they(the younger two) think it's strange that we go out now and then and are not always at home in the evening.

I think the biggest obstacle I personally am still struggling with is my attempt to dress well and actually look and more importantly, feel sexy in what I wear. Before the kids, I had dress sense that went with the young slim figure I had then. That was 20yrs ago. I knew what looked good then, what my shape was and had clothes that fitted that shape nicely. After kids and the years between, my shape and size has totally changed, as expected really. I have spent years in 'Mummy clothes'. You know the comfy stuff like jeans, t-shirts, trainers or flatties that makes it easier to push a double pram! Clothes that are easier to wear cause you can't be bothered and just to tired to make the effort when the kids are small. Well that's changing slowly. I want the woman with dress sense back that I once was even if it's in a different shape body!LOL

It would be interesting to hear about different changes others have made in their lives to pursue this lifestyle. Were the changes worth it or would you approach it in a different way given the opportunity?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

First time i went to chams i wore a pretty chemise down to my knees as i was abit self conscious. The outfits ive put in today only just cover my arse lol how far one comes in four years lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

LOL Perhaps I will be just as brave in 4yrs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't share publicly or privately to be honest so I can't give you the pleasure that you gave me

That was one of the most worthwhile , meaninful and honest posts i've seen on here.

Thanks for the smile xxx Gran xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I don't share publicly or privately to be honest so I can't give you the pleasure that you gave me

That was one of the most worthwhile , meaninful and honest posts i've seen on here.

Thanks for the smile xxx Gran xxx"

Glad I could help with the smile. Must be to damn honest for my own good or just still to new!LOL Not sure if either of those are good or bad yet!

Was just curious really how differently people approach new steps they take in this lifestyle. Definitely not trying to pry into peoples lives and I can now see your point in what you said Gran, so if that is indicated in my OP I apologies as it wasn't intended as such.

Obviously still wet behind the ears!LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We can concurr with you OP Pretty much everything you have said, we have shared the same experiences, with the exception of the bi thing. Kate has tried it, but has decided that it's not for her.

Kate has always had a bubbly personality and I'm not ashamed to say that I have clung on and have been pulled along, lol while trying to build my own self confidence.

We have always gone out together though, so we haven't drawn attention to ourselves on that front.

We've come a long way in those two years and we are both at ease and comfortable with what we do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't share publicly or privately to be honest so I can't give you the pleasure that you gave me

That was one of the most worthwhile , meaninful and honest posts i've seen on here.

Thanks for the smile xxx Gran xxx

Glad I could help with the smile. Must be to damn honest for my own good or just still to new!LOL Not sure if either of those are good or bad yet!

Was just curious really how differently people approach new steps they take in this lifestyle. Definitely not trying to pry into peoples lives and I can now see your point in what you said Gran, so if that is indicated in my OP I apologies as it wasn't intended as such.

Obviously still wet behind the ears!LOL "

Gawd. Now you are seeing things that are not there. It was an HONEST thanks ... loved the post. Was just saying I don't divvy up me or my life until there is a real cemented trusting frienship ..... now i've said too much xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I honestly cannot remember any big changes, except acquiring a bigger dose of self-confidence to flaunt my body and a bigger wardrobe of sexy underwear!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"We can concurr with you OP Pretty much everything you have said, we have shared the same experiences, with the exception of the bi thing. Kate has tried it, but has decided that it's not for her.

Kate has always had a bubbly personality and I'm not ashamed to say that I have clung on and have been pulled along, lol while trying to build my own self confidence.

We have always gone out together though, so we haven't drawn attention to ourselves on that front.

We've come a long way in those two years and we are both at ease and comfortable with what we do. "

That is another adjustment to deal with isn't it? The self confidence in oneself has to grow to be able to enjoy the benefits of swinging. I would imagine the more outgoing and bubbly a person is the easier it is for them to change something to accommodate this lifestyle.

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By *assybutclassyCouple
over a year ago

Swingin seaside resort....


"I honestly cannot remember any big changes, except acquiring a bigger dose of self-confidence to flaunt my body and a bigger wardrobe of sexy underwear! "
....SNAP !!, i feel exactly the same way....xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I don't share publicly or privately to be honest so I can't give you the pleasure that you gave me

That was one of the most worthwhile , meaninful and honest posts i've seen on here.

Thanks for the smile xxx Gran xxx

Glad I could help with the smile. Must be to damn honest for my own good or just still to new!LOL Not sure if either of those are good or bad yet!

Was just curious really how differently people approach new steps they take in this lifestyle. Definitely not trying to pry into peoples lives and I can now see your point in what you said Gran, so if that is indicated in my OP I apologies as it wasn't intended as such.

Obviously still wet behind the ears!LOL

Gawd. Now you are seeing things that are not there. It was an HONEST thanks ... loved the post. Was just saying I don't divvy up me or my life until there is a real cemented trusting frienship ..... now i've said too much xx "

LOL No you haven't said to much and I'm glad you liked the post. I totally understand and respect what you said. You just made me aware that my OP might give the impression that I was possibly being to nosey.

I've always been very open with how I feel about things and don't mind talking about them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have yet to pluck up the courage to venture outside meeting and playing with peeps on a 1-1 basis, and in front of an audience.

Being a bit of an exhibitionist, I believe I will find that bottle one day, and probably very soon!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I honestly cannot remember any big changes, except acquiring a bigger dose of self-confidence to flaunt my body and a bigger wardrobe of sexy underwear! "

yep, this would be me. i was married and didnt have a single basque, didnt wear french knickers or thongs, pretty staid boring wardrobe and no self confidence

now i cant get my drawers closed for sexy undies, wear stocking and feel happy in them, and above all have dresses and heels which i never, ever wore lol

there are a lot of men on here who love BBW, so that in itself opened my eyes, and helped me feel good naked.

Gok needs to get women on here lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It helps big time when I discovered I am not that big, and there are bigger ladies out there who flaunt their curves without betting an eyelid.

So if they can do it, so can I, and have not looked back since!

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