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Struggling

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Having a bad day/week/month/year.

Anyone else have special needs kids or is a carer for someone?

I am just beyond wiped out. And I have to plaster that smiley calm face on and get on with it as soon as school kicks out. And I KNOW it's going to be a rough evening.

Last night was epic, very difficult.

And to top it off my friend, who has "typically developing kids" said "every bedtime is difficult when you have kids. Lol."

Grrrrr.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel for you, sometimes you just want a little rest.

Is there anything like respite care in your area, charitable associations or self help groups for your child's particular condition? My niece is 21 now but my sister still gets help from local groups and respite care for her. Even discussing it with your doctor may help you a little, it helps just to have someone listen. I hope you get some support. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My best friend is going through the same as you right now. Hard for her to stay strong too. Hugs xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bless you hun, sorry you are having such a tough time - and for your friend's insensitivity altho it probably wasn't intended, we all say crass things to people without thinking sometimes.

I can't offer any constructive advice other than what Laine has said already but always happy to "listen" if you want to chat via PM, even if its just to rant and let off steam.

Take care x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Home-start is a nationwide charity who will step in and offer support if you have a child under five. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't envy you. My eldest has autism and ADHD and it's been very tough at times, though it's getting a little easier as he gets older. He's in a special unit now too, which as much as I hate the idea has been a dream come true.

You could speak to the council regarding carers breaks and support, they can often point you in the direction of organisations who can help, even if they can't. In the meantime try not to forget yourself, give yourself small things to look forward to, like a nice bubble bath after the kids are in bed (yeah right, I know but one day may be possible).

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don't envy you. My eldest has autism and ADHD and it's been very tough at times, though it's getting a little easier as he gets older. He's in a special unit now too, which as much as I hate the idea has been a dream come true.

You could speak to the council regarding carers breaks and support, they can often point you in the direction of organisations who can help, even if they can't. In the meantime try not to forget yourself, give yourself small things to look forward to, like a nice bubble bath after the kids are in bed (yeah right, I know but one day may be possible). "

I have two with autism. It's beyond tough. I'm struggling because although they are very articulate, they are like 7 year olds in intellectual terms but 2-3 in emotional terms. So they come across as rude, spoilt brats when we are out.

When in reality I parent my arse off!

They are getting bigger and stronger and I don't think it will be long before one of them leaves marks on me when he goes for me.

I do have family to help out but it's still ridiculous with all the help I get. And I feel for the kids really most of all - to be anxious about every day events in life. It's hard to watch. Very mixed emotions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't envy you. My eldest has autism and ADHD and it's been very tough at times, though it's getting a little easier as he gets older. He's in a special unit now too, which as much as I hate the idea has been a dream come true.

You could speak to the council regarding carers breaks and support, they can often point you in the direction of organisations who can help, even if they can't. In the meantime try not to forget yourself, give yourself small things to look forward to, like a nice bubble bath after the kids are in bed (yeah right, I know but one day may be possible).

I have two with autism. It's beyond tough. I'm struggling because although they are very articulate, they are like 7 year olds in intellectual terms but 2-3 in emotional terms. So they come across as rude, spoilt brats when we are out.

When in reality I parent my arse off!

They are getting bigger and stronger and I don't think it will be long before one of them leaves marks on me when he goes for me.

I do have family to help out but it's still ridiculous with all the help I get. And I feel for the kids really most of all - to be anxious about every day events in life. It's hard to watch. Very mixed emotions."

I have a disabled child, most of it is to do with incontinence now and sorting that out and has got easier over they years, he isn't really able to be left unsupervised either and i wonder if my life is over sometimes. Have been times when i felt like cracking up though and it's been really hard, don't know how i even got through those times, think i switched off emotionally and always put myself last and got on with it and i shouldn't have, i should have come first sometimes.

Don't know if it will ever get easier for you, i've had a lot of hassle over me not coping (these people should fucking have helped then instead of criticising), i do think you have to hold yourself back emotionally just to cope and not slap the shit out of people who make comments and just try to focus on how good of a job you really are doing under the circumstances. Not got any advice really but don't worry what anyone else think because they are just ignorant- educate them if you can be bothered but i couldn't most of the time.

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