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" However, if one partner was being coaxed into playing, we are sure we would be able to spot it, and it would be a "no"." Sorry my English let me down there, my point was that in my experience with Thais and Cambodians, it is very, very *very* hard to tell the lengths they will go to, to mask a feeling. I agree that we can all spot coercion in a more Western setting. | |||
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"But how would you know she was a mail order bride unless they told you" A lot of experience of dealing the aftermath and fallout of Asian desperation, to be fair. | |||
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"But how would you know she was a mail order bride unless they told you" She may have forgotten to take her price tag off? | |||
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" However, if one partner was being coaxed into playing, we are sure we would be able to spot it, and it would be a "no". Sorry my English let me down there, my point was that in my experience with Thais and Cambodians, it is very, very *very* hard to tell the lengths they will go to, to mask a feeling. I agree that we can all spot coercion in a more Western setting." But surely you would say no to anyone that you felt was doing it against their will whatever their nationality or are you assuming that just because a lady is thai she wont be enjoying what she is doing | |||
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"But how would you know she was a mail order bride unless they told you A lot of experience of dealing the aftermath and fallout of Asian desperation, to be fair." Right, i get it now just because you have had experience every thai woman is now a mail order bride. | |||
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" But surely you would say no to anyone that you felt was doing it against their will whatever their nationality or are you assuming that just because a lady is thai she wont be enjoying what she is doing " You misunderstand (my aim was to find out how people felt about couples that fall into the "obvious" category of man goes to bangkok to find wife) but, as what I hoped might be a serious topic has already been derailed farcically, I don't think I'll post again. Thanks for contributing anyway. | |||
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" But surely you would say no to anyone that you felt was doing it against their will whatever their nationality or are you assuming that just because a lady is thai she wont be enjoying what she is doing You misunderstand (my aim was to find out how people felt about couples that fall into the "obvious" category of man goes to bangkok to find wife) but, as what I hoped might be a serious topic has already been derailed farcically, I don't think I'll post again. But what is the obvious category?? Just cause a woman is thai does not make her a mail order bride, this should really be on the sterotype thread. All thai women married to english men are mail order brides Thanks for contributing anyway." | |||
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" But surely you would say no to anyone that you felt was doing it against their will whatever their nationality or are you assuming that just because a lady is thai she wont be enjoying what she is doing You misunderstand (my aim was to find out how people felt about couples that fall into the "obvious" category of man goes to bangkok to find wife) but, as what I hoped might be a serious topic has already been derailed farcically, I don't think I'll post again. Thanks for contributing anyway." To be fair though, you mention you have seen a lot of fallout with Asian brides, and why people were joining in your discussion and asking questions. I suppose to assume every Asian bride is going to be here and put up with their husbands because it is a better life than they had would be contradicting what you said on another thread about assumptions. | |||
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" I think a woman knows when another woman is doing something she doesn't want to do." Yeah I would agree with that , even the submissive women can't be that enthusiastic as women who want to be there surely. | |||
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"lol @ Jane and mushroom" And just what's so funny about that idea? If i were 20 years younger, ( pst i wont mention 2" shorter ) she wouldnt have to try so hard, i'd most likely say yes. | |||
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" I suppose to assume every Asian bride is going to be here and put up with their husbands because it is a better life than they had would be contradicting what you said on another thread about assumptions." Not really, as I never said I assume that - I know of some very happy mixed race marriages, even ones that *are* mail order style. However, my point, perhaps not well made, was that I have seen many, many more negatives than positives. And, to whoever said it, as a western woman, I can assure that you can't always "read" an Asian woman. | |||
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" I suppose to assume every Asian bride is going to be here and put up with their husbands because it is a better life than they had would be contradicting what you said on another thread about assumptions. Not really, as I never said I assume that - I know of some very happy mixed race marriages, even ones that *are* mail order style. However, my point, perhaps not well made, was that I have seen many, many more negatives than positives. And, to whoever said it, as a western woman, I can assure that you can't always "read" an Asian woman." There you go again, how do you know you can read all western women. Some women are easy to read and some are not. Simple, what there cultural background has to do with it beats me | |||
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" I suppose to assume every Asian bride is going to be here and put up with their husbands because it is a better life than they had would be contradicting what you said on another thread about assumptions. Not really, as I never said I assume that - I know of some very happy mixed race marriages, even ones that *are* mail order style. However, my point, perhaps not well made, was that I have seen many, many more negatives than positives. And, to whoever said it, as a western woman, I can assure that you can't always "read" an Asian woman." So they are more submissive and want to please their husbands.............we don't have any dealings with any couples anyway, but doesn't the fact they are not joining in so much give it away or do they go for it anyway? If they do "go for it" anyway, how can anyone be sure that isn't what they want? | |||
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"lol @ Jane and mushroom And just what's so funny about that idea? If i were 20 years younger, ( pst i wont mention 2" shorter ) she wouldnt have to try so hard, i'd most likely say yes. " I am sure you would make a lovely couple lol | |||
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