FabSwingers.com forum: Verifications

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How much weight do people put on these?

I have had a few meets (which I am more than happy with) but I have never asked to be verified. I like to think that I am genuine and come across as such.

There are a few people who have blocked me as I don't have any but should I be bothered?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a great advert for you really mate, we have never asked for verifications but have received a few.

It does make me wonder, either if you have had meets and if so why haven't people offered a verification.

anyway, to answer your question, yes they do make a difference, only in that it shows the person in the profile is the person for real and that they are genuine.

after saying that, we have met non verified members before, and went on to verify them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We verify everyone we meet, even if we just chat to them socially at chameleons, our verification is about them not about had sex didnt have sex etc.

It is about them being what they say they are on thier profile not 10 year old and 10 more stones than thier pictures etc

It is about them being socially cool and easy to chat to.

Those we meet and have sex with we verify in the same way, if we had the best sex ever it doesnt mean the next person to meet them will even enjoy the sex as we all like different things so the sex side of it is imaterial, thier personalities and honesty is what we report on.

Those who wish to show the verification do so those who dont keep it hidden.

We dont verify people that dont match the criteria above, so if we found them to be pushy or not like thier pictures etc we would not verify them.

When someone tells us they have had a few meets off here and have no verifications we start to wonder ?

If people hide all verifications we just treat them as we treat unverified people (ie will still meet but are even more cautious)

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

Almost top of our list - we are very wary of people with no verifications

And those we only web cams verification we tend not to bother with either - we look for people who can walk the walk and not those whose piss us about...

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

It depends. Some people will not meet you if you have no verifications, some people will not meet you if you have too many verifications, some people don't care if you have a verification or not. You can't win either way lol.

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By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

Its simple if you think about it.

If you have no verifications there is no one to vouch on here for you. Men often won’t care but women and couples may be more wary.

If you have a few verifications but they are from hidden profiles. People get suspicious thinking all sorts.

If you only have 1 verification from 6 months ago then your not much of a catch.

If you have verifications from someone the person who is looking at your proile then they will be put off you.

If you have lots of verifications you are either a rabbit or not fussy.

If you have verifications from ugly people then you’re an any port in the storm sort.

If you have really nice verifications then your too good to be true.

So you can always hide your verifications!!

Ahhh but then your hiding something!

So whats the answer for a male?

Put up a really big cock pic you remodelled with photoshop

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont exclude people without verifications but must admit if there are none and someone has been on here a while i'd be more reluctant to bother. Plus it gives us women an idea that if someone has been verified a few time they are unlikely to be some mad axe man. So yes they do help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We'd def prefer verifications. We have quite a few and don't put them public but if we're in contact with someone we might meet we display them for them to look at and I'm sure that helps their decision making.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

verifications are not the be all and end all to getting meets... however they I do think help in the grander scale of picking between people...

They don't have to be graphic... I don't really like them to be and the people I have met know that...

some of mine are purely social... some a lot further gone....

in the end it is about verifications you are happy with and happy to show.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find profiles with hundreds of verifications off putting.

Profiles with no verifications after claiming to meet I avoid.

No verifications didn't bother me until I met someone in that position.

Suffice it to say I could see why he wasn't verified so tend to avoid non-verifieds now.

For me all I need to see is a straight male verified by a female/straight couple as genuine. One will do!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

For me personally, unless they have been on here since the year dot and not managed to get a tick, verifications don't mean a lot.

I like to think I am able to judge people for myself by what they type and say.

I am not bothered if I can't see someone's verifications. If I can see them, I do look to see what sort of people they have met and then look to see what they have written about the people they have met... rather than what people have written about them. If they write verificatins which sound like a bad porn script it puts me right off.

Anyway, I am of the opinion that many verifications are a pile of bollox. If they were honest, instead of saying "Ladies he has a tongue to die for and his fingers wow..." they'd say "Adiquate, but could do with a wider variety of skills and a bit more imagination"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/07/10 09:03:37]

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

We meet people without verifications, as we meet single men not all of them have them anyway......but I am surprised that you don't want verifications after a meet, as they will open the doors to people who do like to see verifications and possibly get you more fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

personally i won't meet anyone without a decent chat with them - thats not just a 5min chat, its over a period of time.

if the guys don't like to pursue that, then i'm not for them. i do have quite a few verifications. that doesn't make me a 'fuck anyone' girl, i'm just enjoying the time on here. The guys i've met will tell you how hard it is to meet me lol

At the end of the day, everyone has different standards. I'm not put off or attracted byt the volume of verifications. One will do me if it's positive and they are easy to chat to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends what sort they are,Phone and cam are not much use.

The if people have them on show, how long was the last one, are the off; men, women, couples?

Does the verifications match up with their profile, and if your really through, cross reference with the giving profile

Of course that's my view and other will have their own

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By *uckscouple2007Couple
over a year ago

Bucks

We do tend to walk on past couple profiles where they've been members for over a year but still unverified .. yet have a friends list a mile long

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By *ngieandMrManCouple
over a year ago

hereford

May I ask a question of all those who say they ignore profiles with no feedback… how did you get started in the swinging scene? And, when you first started and had no verifications were you a crap meet?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most of us are happy to meet people without verifications, we just set more store by those that have them, personally we just take more care over those without to check that they are genuine.

We are however extremely put off by the person who has been on here for over a year, has no verifications and simply sends us a friend invite, we can't help thinking they are just friend collectors.

Human nature dictates how people act.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"May I ask a question of all those who say they ignore profiles with no feedback… how did you get started in the swinging scene? And, when you first started and had no verifications were you a crap meet?"

Many of the people here join on recommendation from people they have met at clubs and therefore get verified within hours of joining the site. That was certainly true in our case and we also recommend a lot of people we meet at clubs to join this site, when they do we verify them immediately because we know they are genuine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we don't pay much attention to verifications as we like to make our own opinions on people. Someone elses opinion of a person or couple will not deter us from meeting, or indeed will it hasten our decision to meet.

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By *uckscouple2007Couple
over a year ago

Bucks

"we don't pay much attention to verifications as we like to make our own opinions on people. Someone elses opinion of a person or couple will not deter us from meeting, or indeed will it hasten our decision to meet.

Totally agree that verifys wont inform you as to whether you are compatible but if they have been on here for "over a year" and remain unverified then dont you ever ask yourself .... are they gen?

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I always think that if you go to clubs, parties and socials and you meet people that you want to play with you would'nt make them log on to Fab to check out their veris would you?

You would just get on with the fun without knowing any of their swinging history because you have made up your mind on your own that they're nice people and you want to play with them

This is why I don't get all the fuss about them

Obviously this does'nt apply to those that don't do the clubs parties or socials

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I always think that if you go to clubs, parties and socials and you meet people that you want to play with you would'nt make them log on to Fab to check out their veris would you?

You would just get on with the fun without knowing any of their swinging history because you have made up your mind on your own that they're nice people and you want to play with them

This is why I don't get all the fuss about them

Obviously this does'nt apply to those that don't do the clubs parties or socials

I couldn't agree more. The entire verification thing is simply to eastablish whether the people you're talking to is a genuine couple or not (I know singles have veris but I'm referring specifically to couples here). In a club it's different as you can see that there are two of them, so it doesn't need verifying.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"In a club it's different as you can see that there are two of them, so it doesn't need verifying."

You've been borrowing my beer goggles again...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Verifications are important, we always check out a persons varis before we respond or contact someone we are interested in, we ignore phone and cam varis as these do not mean a person is gen for meets and if their varis are hidden we ask to see them, it's not their performance we look at but that they actually do turn up for meets and we are very weay of people who have been on for over a year and have none, both of us also have separate profiles on here, one of us shows, the other doesn't but is happy to if asked, what annoys us though is when a person that has verified you leaves site & you loose what they have said about you, why can't the vari remain with the heading "user no longer on site", as messages do, until you delete them.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"Verifications are important, we always check out a persons varis before we respond or contact someone we are interested in, we ignore phone and cam varis as these do not mean a person is gen for meets and if their varis are hidden we ask to see them, it's not their performance we look at but that they actually do turn up for meets and we are very weay of people who have been on for over a year and have none, both of us also have separate profiles on here, one of us shows, the other doesn't but is happy to if asked, what annoys us though is when a person that has verified you leaves site & you loose what they have said about you, why can't the vari remain with the heading "user no longer on site", as messages do, until you delete them."

It doesn't show they "turn up for meets" though... it shows they turned up for 'that' meet (history)... they could have not turned up for 10 times the number of meets as they have turned up to.

I haven't encountered too many timewasters on this site, but every single one I have encountered was verified.

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

There are hidden warnings in verifications - check the history of those leaving them

There is a lot of difference between - "fantastic couple want to meet them again" and "we had a great time"

(we didn't know this but another couple put us onto it..)

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"There are hidden warnings in verifications - check the history of those leaving them

There is a lot of difference between - "fantastic couple want to meet them again" and "we had a great time"

(we didn't know this but another couple put us onto it..)

I think you'll find the vast majority of people don't know this... as it's bullshit.... unless a small group of people have decided to use a secret code. The trouble with secret codes is... they only work if generally people don't know them, and if people don't know them then what's the point? You can easily PM your mates and say how shite someone was.

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

It's not a secret code - but a way of differentiating feedback

Only being helpful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to get a feeling for someone as I chat and Message over a period of time, I meet People without Veri's if I think they come across as decent

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"It's not a secret code - but a way of differentiating feedback

Only being helpful."

So how does it work then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone *didnt* verify us, I'd worry that they had a shit time, and that we were shit hosts.

Similarly, we'd never be rude enough to not verify someone.

As to how we see verifications, well, if you've got a hand full of good ones, I think it's a definet plus.

If you've got 100s and it looks like you'll go with anything that offers it up, well, not so good maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and phone / cam verifications? Mean nothing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everyone refuses to meet the non-verified - we do, for instance. The difference is you might find we spend longer getting to know the people via email and the like beforehand, to a point where we are happy they are real.

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By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

"If someone *didnt* verify us, I'd worry that they had a shit time, and that we were shit hosts.

Similarly, we'd never be rude enough to not verify someone.

That's the crux - you feel you have to verify so show they actually turned up but it's how you verify that matters

You can't say something pants because they won't display the verification but more importantly it's rude

But you can verify they turned up and were a nice couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If someone *didnt* verify us, I'd worry that they had a shit time, and that we were shit hosts.

Similarly, we'd never be rude enough to not verify someone.

That's the crux - you feel you have to verify so show they actually turned up but it's how you verify that matters

You can't say something pants because they won't display the verification but more importantly it's rude

But you can verify they turned up and were a nice couple"

Absolutely and, as has been said, you can tell a lot by the verification language... for instance "Had a great time, looking forward to many more" does not read the same as "Met this guy today, was polite and nice, many thanks".

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"If someone *didnt* verify us, I'd worry that they had a shit time, and that we were shit hosts.

Similarly, we'd never be rude enough to not verify someone.

That's the crux - you feel you have to verify so show they actually turned up but it's how you verify that matters

You can't say something pants because they won't display the verification but more importantly it's rude

But you can verify they turned up and were a nice couple

That just says to me that they have met, he was real, but they may or may not have got on enough to meet again. I don't think it is a bad thing, as we won't all get on or want to play with everyone, and you won't know for sure until you meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does anyone else use potential meets verifcations to judge their potential meets standards?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If someone *didnt* verify us, I'd worry that they had a shit time, and that we were shit hosts.

Similarly, we'd never be rude enough to not verify someone.

As to how we see verifications, well, if you've got a hand full of good ones, I think it's a definet plus.

If you've got 100s and it looks like you'll go with anything that offers it up, well, not so good maybe."

I've met the same people several times and I've not verified them, or they me for the simple reason we don't see the point of having hundreds of verifications saying how wonderful we are.

We don't see it as rude, and certainly not in need of reassurances from every meet that we weren't shite!!

As with everything, people use the site in a way that suits them!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

We make our own mind up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How much weight do people put on these?

I have had a few meets (which I am more than happy with) but I have never asked to be verified. I like to think that I am genuine and come across as such.

There are a few people who have blocked me as I don't have any but should I be bothered?"

Yes. Be bothered. I find it quite amazing if not stupid that someone should think that others should just take them at their word.

I have met people without verifications and still will as I tend to make my own mind up from chatting on the phone.

On the flip side - I have not wanted to meet some people when i've noticed who has verified them. Nothing to do with whether they are fanciable or not ..that's personal but there are some I won't play with as they look unsanitary , messy or simply problematic and argumentative.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of the best things I've read here in ages. If people would just take some time to get decent photos, and a profile to go along with it, it'd be so good.

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By *undebigaryMan
over a year ago

dundee

"How much weight do people put on these?

I have had a few meets (which I am more than happy with) but I have never asked to be verified. I like to think that I am genuine and come across as such.

There are a few people who have blocked me as I don't have any but should I be bothered?"
I think they do carry a bit of weight.cos if somebody has ten verifacations that there gen an hot.then they probaly are.an i like getin them to.cos im just going to be totally honest here im shallow an its good for my ego.lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"an i like getin them to.cos im just going to be totally honest here im shallow an its good for my ego.lol"

I dont think it's shallow at all. Noone wants to think they are crap at things, especially this.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"If someone *didnt* verify us, I'd worry that they had a shit time, and that we were shit hosts.

Similarly, we'd never be rude enough to not verify someone.

That's the crux - you feel you have to verify so show they actually turned up but it's how you verify that matters

You can't say something pants because they won't display the verification but more importantly it's rude

But you can verify they turned up and were a nice couple

May be they only arranged to meet him for a chat.... may be he showed signs he wasn't interested so they didn't want to go over the top.... may be they were just not in the mood on the day.... may be he was having an off day.... may be they just didn't feel the spark.

We don't all fancy the same people. To write someone off because they didn't get "fantastic" "super" "amazing" typed in their verification is a bit sad really. I'd never use any of those words in a verification. What's more, I have read glowing reports in verifications, spoke to them on the phone and thought "what a boring, thick twat". I've met folk who are reportedly "WOW" and at best I'd say "lacked imagination".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't all fancy the same people. To write someone off because they didn't get "fantastic" "super" "amazing" typed in their verification is a bit sad really.

Noone even said that.

same ol same ol.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

We don't all fancy the same people. To write someone off because they didn't get "fantastic" "super" "amazing" typed in their verification is a bit sad really.

Noone even said that.

same ol same ol."

So what is it that the verification language is telling you alot about then?

same ol same ol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We make our own mind up."

We do too.

Also we dont read between the lines at veri's,thats judging someone without knowing that person.

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By *yber pimpMan
over a year ago

durham area

"How much weight do people put on these?

I have had a few meets (which I am more than happy with) but I have never asked to be verified. I like to think that I am genuine and come across as such.

There are a few people who have blocked me as I don't have any but should I be bothered?"

they are an essential part of your profile, it lets others know what the people you have met think of you.

i wouldnt as a rule invite anyone to one of my meets without at least one meet verification, not phone or webcam

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"they are an essential part of your profile, it lets others know what the people you have met think of you.

i wouldnt as a rule invite anyone to one of my meets without at least one meet verification, not phone or webcam"

Don't agree that they are essential. Ours are hidden, for reasons I have explained earlier in the thread. We take each contact on its own merit. First impression is the first mail and the response to our reply. We don't care what other people think of the person or persons we are speaking to.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"they are an essential part of your profile, it lets others know what the people you have met think of you.

i wouldnt as a rule invite anyone to one of my meets without at least one meet verification, not phone or webcam

Agreed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How much weight do people put on these?

I have had a few meets (which I am more than happy with) but I have never asked to be verified. I like to think that I am genuine and come across as such.

There are a few people who have blocked me as I don't have any but should I be bothered?"

if i meet someone i will verify them but if someone isnt verified im wary

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