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career change

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By *uitar_antihero OP   Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

I have decided to quit the uni malarkey & become a stand up comedian.

All I need is the right look, the clothes, a manager, stage presence, the ability to come up with witty & funny jokes, come backs & stories & the ability to deliver said jokes lines & stories with comedy timing & in a manner that makes people laugh.

Hmm.....doesnt look achievable.

What do you need to achieve your dream occupation?

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

I need my manager to stop kissing directors arse in the hope that she will one day become one, and actually start giving a shit about her staff, residents and working environment.

That is the only thing making my job difficult at the minute and making my dream job very unhappy.

Failing that, a couple of grand so I can get some more tandem jumps out of the way, then learn how to jump alone amd become a sky dive instructor.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A bloody miricale, and 3 A levels!

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

I'm lucky enough that I wangled my dream job this year... madly underqualified, but love it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To work out what my dream occupation is, so I can try and achieve it!

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By *iuliettaWoman
over a year ago

DEVIZES

I want to be a crazy cat lady so all I need is more cats!

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I'd love to be a stand up comic. I also need the right look, the clothes, a manager, stage presence, the ability to come up with witty & funny jokes, come backs & stories & the ability to deliver said jokes lines & stories with comedy timing & in a manner that makes people laugh.

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

A cellar

Skin scissors

Several lamp shade frames

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Loads of money, and the strength to watch it go down the drain, as running a restaurant is a heartbreakingly expensive endeavour.

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By *uitar_antihero OP   Man
over a year ago

Glasgow


"I'd love to be a stand up comic. I also need the right look, the clothes, a manager, stage presence, the ability to come up with witty & funny jokes, come backs & stories & the ability to deliver said jokes lines & stories with comedy timing & in a manner that makes people laugh. "

Want to be a double act?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"A cellar

Skin scissors

Several lamp shade frames"

Don't forget the lotion!

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden


"A cellar

Skin scissors

Several lamp shade frames

Don't forget the lotion!"

Of course! Never forget the lotion.

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

An oxy/acetalene torch, a jig and a shed load of tubes.

I would love to be a bicycle frame builder.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"I'd love to be a stand up comic. I also need the right look, the clothes, a manager, stage presence, the ability to come up with witty & funny jokes, come backs & stories & the ability to deliver said jokes lines & stories with comedy timing & in a manner that makes people laugh.

Want to be a double act? "

It's one idea. You'd need to be the straight guy

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By *uitar_antihero OP   Man
over a year ago

Glasgow


"I'd love to be a stand up comic. I also need the right look, the clothes, a manager, stage presence, the ability to come up with witty & funny jokes, come backs & stories & the ability to deliver said jokes lines & stories with comedy timing & in a manner that makes people laugh.

Want to be a double act?

It's one idea. You'd need to be the straight guy "

That's our first joke right there!! I come on stage introducing myself & then you come on. I say "who are you?" "I'm the straight guy" is your reply. The audience lol's

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

And then I say 'that's not what you told me last night, darling' and then to the audience - 'typical guy, as soon as you let him use your stomach as a paddling pool for his sperm, he loses interest.'

As it happens, I've just got in from seeing a gig tonight. Holly Walsh, Matt Richardson and Alfie Moore

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