FabSwingers.com forum: Constructive criticism

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Honestly I am not a bitch I am lovely lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

did she ask for comments?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Not many men take any notice of my profile advice anyway

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"did she ask for comments?

She did actually lol

She had put do you like this style I am in today what do you think

Her hair was great but as usual make up she just doesn't get

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Perhaps others don't think it looks bad and if she is happy with how she looks what does it matter?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Perhaps others don't think it looks bad and if she is happy with how she looks what does it matter?

I think they know it does but are too nice to say anything

But she obviously loves it so that's cool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People will often take written comments the wrong way. Then when one person speaks up others will smell blood and they'll steam in as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

You should do what most husbands do and that is lie.

When she says, 'does my bum look big in this?'. Instead of telling the truth, 'your bum looks big in everything', just say 'no'. That way everyone is happy and you can actually go out and have a bevvy together, rather than having one on your own, drowning your sorrows and wondering were it all went wrong.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"did she ask for comments?

She did actually lol

She had put do you like this style I am in today what do you think

Her hair was great but as usual make up she just doesn't get "

I think its a difficult call then. She probably didn't want criticism at all and was after a bit of validation.

On here people sometimes ask for honest advice and kick off when it isn't the "aww hun you're gorgeous" that they thought they were going to get.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

You should do what most husbands do and that is lie.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one likes being critisized, even if it was constructive!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know nothing of make up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Once some twins I was friends with where arguing and I was sat listening ( school days ) and eventually I piped up and tried to put their sides across and they both ended up walking off together in a mood with me ha ha

Me thinks me need to shut it lol

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

"
So you lied then offered advice? Cannot see why on earth you would block for that, obviously not a great friend then.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No one likes being critisized, even if it was constructive!

I didn't criticise I complemented if you read what I said lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I ever were to ask a person for constructive criticism, I think they'd respond with a moment of silence, followed by opening a packet of biscuits and putting the kettle on.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If I ever were to ask a person for constructive criticism, I think they'd respond with a moment of silence, followed by opening a packet of biscuits and putting the kettle on."

Ha ha ha ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone asks me to be honest i really will be..

But if i ask people to give me honest opinions i expect them to be brutally honest with me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on who is asking depends on if i pussy foot or be brutal..

Believe you can say things in different ways but can convey the same message..

Id be tactful with a stranger but more blunt with a friend

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends on who is asking depends on if i pussy foot or be brutal..

Believe you can say things in different ways but can convey the same message..

Id be tactful with a stranger but more blunt with a friend "

I think I always try to be nice I'm a quiet sort of person so I try to be nice and soft

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Once a lad I worked on nights with had a blog and the site had a function where you could click to go to a random blog. I did that and small world, came upon the blog of a temp lad on days, who was agonising about being in the closet. There were no secrets on nights on a 3 person crew and so we decided that being in the closest was no one's business, but his and we wished him all the best, despite him landing work on us every so often.

One of the commentators on his blog was a lass with issues. She was one of these peeps that seemed to feel as if she was constantly getting the shitty end of every stick. Every job she had had, the boss hated her. Every guy she met fell out with her and turned out to be an arsehole. In fab parlance, the one constant was herself. All of her friends had names like 'constantloser' or 'suicide is relief' and so on.

Ironically, I knew this girl from the 6th form, so I put an anonymous comment on, stating that she used to appear to be a really positive person and had she thought about standing outside the box and looking at decisions she had made, rather than just blaming everyone else.

It went down like a lead balloon. I ended up just shrugging my shoulders and leaving it with her.

I'm glad to say, she did turn her life around and is now on my facebook, living abroad with a husband and family.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

Criticism is hard to take, even if its nice criticism lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't give constructive critism on style or makeup etc, we are all different and no one way is the right way.

A woman I work with disagrees on my style, she constantly asks me whether I worry about what people say or whether it bothers me if people look at me. Of course it doesn't affece at all, I couldnt give a hoot on whether others like it, I never ask for other peoples opinions either.

OP I wouldn't have said anything, it dies come across as a little bitchy. it doesn't matter whether you approve of her makeup, in certain instances we should practice tact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honestly I am not a bitch I am lovely lol

Lol x she n her mates didnt have on their listening ears x sometimes it's beat to say nothing x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

Why did you feel the need to do it publicly rather than privately would be my question.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

How do you feel about.constructive criticism when it's directed towards you?

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I suggested to Sarah Millican on twitter that the girls in Bravissimo would do wonders for her. It was the best advice I'd been given, they are fabulous for girls with big bewbs and she properly went off on one. I wasn't being rude, I was entirely pleasant in sharing my good fortune and she lost the plot and told me I'd overstepped the mark.

Oops!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hey well done guys I was expecting more than one or two to turn against me as usually happens

)))))

That's brill you all read what I put (most of you ) that i commented in a really live friendly way

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I suggested to Sarah Millican on twitter that the girls in Bravissimo would do wonders for her. It was the best advice I'd been given, they are fabulous for girls with big bewbs and she properly went off on one. I wasn't being rude, I was entirely pleasant in sharing my good fortune and she lost the plot and told me I'd overstepped the mark.

Oops!

That's kinda what happened here lol

Oops

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Oops!

That's kinda what happened here lol

Oops "

Yeah... part of me thought well love... you keep your saggy tits and carry on wearing tents. Don't say I didn't try!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You just have to put yourself on the receiving end of it and think that if an acquaintance or a stranger messaged you on a social media site and said 'your hair looks scraggy, I can recommend a good hairdresser, or something similar, then would you say, god I'm so grateful that women has pointed out a fault publicly and I will do what she says to better myself or wold you reply, you cheeky bitch take a closer look in the mirror love, as would be my response.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You just have to put yourself on the receiving end of it and think that if an acquaintance or a stranger messaged you on a social media site and said 'your hair looks scraggy, I can recommend a good hairdresser, or something similar, then would you say, god I'm so grateful that women has pointed out a fault publicly and I will do what she says to better myself or wold you reply, you cheeky bitch take a closer look in the mirror love, as would be my response. "

Guess you didn't read the post lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't give constructive critism on style or makeup etc, we are all different and no one way is the right way.

OP I wouldn't have said anything, it dies come across as a little bitchy. it doesn't matter whether you approve of her makeup, in certain instances we should practice tact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would hope my friends would be honest with me, even if it may hurt a bit at first, I'd like to think they had my best interests at heart and wanted me to look as good as I can

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So today I thought I would comment "

Sounds like you've wanted to say something for a while and spotted an opportunity.

Obviously it's going to be a sensitive issue so never give advice (critisicism) unless you are directly asked for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Let her walk around looking like a twat lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oops!

That's kinda what happened here lol

Oops

Yeah... part of me thought well love... you keep your saggy tits and carry on wearing tents. Don't say I didn't try!

Yeah but maybe she likes wearing tents and doesn't mind having saggy tits.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like she was having a down day and wanted a bit of positive attention. I think it's good to be honest, but you could of in boxed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I keep out of it when people ask because my answers are blunt

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sounds like she was having a down day and wanted a bit of positive attention. I think it's good to be honest, but you could of in boxed."

If I in boxed I would be making an issue wouldn't i so I commented nicely under the pic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you do it ?

Has it ever back fired ??

I just tried to give a girl on my fb a helping hand on her make up as I have noticed how she looks horrendous but I have never said anything .

So today I thought I would comment . So I was really nice complemented her and her make up and hair and then said have you tried these techniques etc

Explained them

And bloooody hell

All her mates jumped on the band wagon saying she looks amazing ( she looks a twat ) and my really helpful comment got deleted lol

I blocked her as can't be bothered .

I was so nice about it so I find it quite funny as I could of been blunt really and said you look like your three year old has done your make up

Tut tut tut

( honestly I was nice and said it nicely and had the best intentions )

So you lied then offered advice? Cannot see why on earth you would block for that, obviously not a great friend then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you tell people things they don't like they can often get pissed. Is you do it tactlessly they nearly always get pissed with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It baffles me why any girl / woman wants to look like they have been tangoed and yet do and think that look good

Sometimes the truth as in you look like a right old rip or a two bob brass does not go down well

But if they were a real friend they would laugh and say you may have a point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey well done guys I was expecting more than one or two to turn against me as usually happens

)))))

That's brill you all read what I put (most of you ) that i commented in a really live friendly way

Well no you commented falsely as you were lying then said "oh try this".

Most people see through the fake compliments.

Basically what your complaining about here is that her friends are perceptive and dint fall for your fake flattery.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hey well done guys I was expecting more than one or two to turn against me as usually happens

)))))

That's brill you all read what I put (most of you ) that i commented in a really live friendly way

Well no you commented falsely as you were lying then said "oh try this".

Most people see through the fake compliments.

Basically what your complaining about here is that her friends are perceptive and dint fall for your fake flattery. "

Okies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It baffles me why any girl / woman wants to look like they have been tangoed and yet do and think that look good

Sometimes the truth as in you look like a right old rip or a two bob brass does not go down well

But if they were a real friend they would laugh and say you may have a point "

Its not a look I like but young people like different things. when I was a teenager my much older sister didn't like my makeup but I didn't care what anyone else thought especialy my much older plainer sister as she would be the last person I would take advice from because I didn't think she looked attractive.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It baffles me why any girl / woman wants to look like they have been tangoed and yet do and think that look good

Sometimes the truth as in you look like a right old rip or a two bob brass does not go down well

But if they were a real friend they would laugh and say you may have a point

I remember sitting for hours with my purple eye shadow and eye liner and lipstick with my magazines trying to get the look ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sounds like she was having a down day and wanted a bit of positive attention. I think it's good to be honest, but you could of in boxed.

If I in boxed I would be making an issue wouldn't i so I commented nicely under the pic "

Well technically you Constructiy criticised, meant with good intentions but not received that way. I'd die if that happened to me, I'd of taken it much better if you'd of in boxed me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have let her get on with it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would have let her get on with it

I will in future ha ha ha

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Oops!

That's kinda what happened here lol

Oops

Yeah... part of me thought well love... you keep your saggy tits and carry on wearing tents. Don't say I didn't try!

Yeah but maybe she likes wearing tents and doesn't mind having saggy tits.

She has a much better shape now so she's done something. I really did have the best intentions. At the time I was mortified to have upset her. It was good advice that friends gave me. I just wanted to make her feel better. She's forever going on about her appearance and she's in the public eye in comedy.

It would have come over better from her friends but they obviously hadn't said anything. (I think she has good tits but they could be (and are now) better.

Alls well. She unblocked me after that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guess you didn't read the post lol "

Yes I did read the post.

You were fake when you complimented her on her hair and make up, you really thought she looked horrendous, looked like a twat and looked as if a 3 year old had put the makeup on.

Your 'helpful' comments were seen though by this girl and her mates. They thought you were being a bitch.

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