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Fundamentalist Bullseye

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By *inaTitz OP   TV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Can you imagine an international religious fundamentalist version of Bullseye?

Host the legendary Jim Bowen, a man out of his depth putting the kettle on. The studio is located in the Celestial Court (J28 M1). The couples are made up of a pair of Jewish Fundamentalists, Christian Fundamentalists and Muslim Fundamentalists. Everyone has a beard, including the bronze bully, but not Jim or Tony Green, obviously, as they'd look silly.

In the first round the categories are: faces, spelling, sport, affairs, geography and books. This proved difficult for Jim, despite the high scoring of the dartsmen. Spotting the person behind the Niqab is pretty tricky and as the fundamentalists had banned sport that limited the scope in that question. When it came to Affairs, all contestants answered with 'by stoning', which wasn't what Jim had on his card. Spelling was controversial, as it was the word Messiah. The Jewish Fundamentalists spelt it as Messiah ben David, the Christians as Jesus and the Muslims as Muhammed. Jim had actually got Dagenham and Redbridge due to picking up the wrong card. Geography seemed a safe option, but instead ended up in a brawl as it related to which country Jerusalem was in. When it came to books, Jim fared no better, as all the fundamentalists only believed there was one book worth reading.

After peace had been restored they moved on to the second round.

Correction, Tony Green has just announced Peace wasn't restored, because all the fundamentalists were equally a pain in the arse and couldn't agree to just crack on with the game.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You get nothing for 2 in a bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Replace Tony Green with Tony Blair.

He's very adept with these things.

Apparently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Super smashing great

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First prize : a one way ticket to Mosul

Second prize : a return ticket

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Would the whole scenario be fundamentally feasible

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By *inaTitz OP   TV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"Would the whole scenario be fundamentally feasible "

I'd watch it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about the orthodox religions

And the Jedi?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would the whole scenario be fundamentally feasible

I'd watch it. "

Iiiiiiiiiiiin one, -

Tina, you seriously need to consider comedy writing!

......& I know that you're secretly a member of The Judean people's front - but it's okay, I wont tell a soul!!

........splitter! (Whispered)

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By *horltzMan
over a year ago

heysham

Look what you could have won !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fundamentalists would be burning bendy bullies and dartboards in the street.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Who won the speedboat?

A

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Who won the speedboat?

A"

Speedboat? The work of the Devil!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The fundamentalists would be burning bendy bullies and dartboards in the street. "

& they'll be throwing crafty cockneys off of big cliffs & horrendous stuff like that...........& stuff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And the Rastafarians ?

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By *inaTitz OP   TV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"And the Rastafarians ?"

Can you imagine a fundamentalist Rasta troubling anyone? They'd be way too chilled to want to impose their beliefs on the world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And the Rastafarians ?

Can you imagine a fundamentalist Rasta troubling anyone? They'd be way too chilled to want to impose their beliefs on the world "

Maybe maybe not Buddhists I would say are amongst the most passive of religions but you are now getting extreme Buddhists who are militant so who knows.

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By *inaTitz OP   TV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"

Maybe maybe not Buddhists I would say are amongst the most passive of religions but you are now getting extreme Buddhists who are militant so who knows. "

They have to be militant to get on this show. The same with the Hari Krishnas. They need a wing that's into Ultra Violence if they are to stand a chance.

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