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affirmation threads? why do people need them?

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By *abio OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

are people into.....

I always find these questions interesting... because it almost feels like the question asker's need some sort of affirmation...

tall or short?

fat or thin?

black or white?

single or married?

young or old?

ect..... ect.... ect....

you are not going to appeal to everyone.... so why try??? so I don't these threads help other peoples confidence in any way shape or form....

if you were going to ask a million people what they like, I am sure you would get a million answers! I think we lovingly call it.... erm.... preference

so if someone was white... and everyone said they liked black guys.... what ya going to do about it????

if someone was young.... and everyone said they likes older guys..... what you going to do about it????

so in reality... its not someone wanting to find out an answer.. because there isn't going to be a "one size fits all" answer..... its just basically a fishing exercise

p.s anyone like a large, black, approaching 40, sarcastic, tells it like it is, guy?????

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By *abio OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I do wonder that if people are that "fragile" is swinging really for them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooo look at you look at you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I do wonder that if people are that "fragile" is swinging really for them? "

So agree with you on this

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I just see then as canvassing threads....pitting the question out there to see who likes whatever and using that to contact any of those that they like.

I don't see them as threads where people will use the outcome to change anything.

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By *abio OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"Ooo look at you look at you "

I know... show off big long wordy person....

seriously though... its something where I think "if you are that fragile when you need to look to other people to affirm you, the rejection must crush!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think in politics its known as kite flying.

May be wrong.

They ain't feeling enough coming back from what there putting out which confuses them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just see then as canvassing threads....pitting the question out there to see who likes whatever and using that to contact any of those that they like.

I don't see them as threads where people will use the outcome to change anything. "

just this its a look a me thread they must work. ......least we haven't had a rate my wife etc for ages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with Fabio.

I mean, lets say a chap is 6'2, average build, white and single and asks what sorts of guys people are into, it's hardly as if he can get a height reduction, black up and put on the lbs to suit someone who might be into short tubby black fellas. (No offence to anyone)

Seems to me that such threads are nothing more than a 'look at me' vanity thread.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I do wonder that if people are that "fragile" is swinging really for them? "

I agree. I tend to avoid such threads: neediness on a nsa site is painful to watch.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

swinging takes a certain amount of ooomph, it is really not for the lily livered, meeting total strangers for sex.... if you constantly need reassurance, god help your meets

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"I just see then as canvassing threads....pitting the question out there to see who likes whatever and using that to contact any of those that they like.

. "

This for me too

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's more of a attention thing I feel. They probably already know that some women/men like their type, they are just looking to attract them on the forum by pointing out what they are.

It is a poor effort, but people can do what they like within the rules.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"

but people can do what they like within the rules."

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

Some need affirmation and some don't. There are few in these fora who never explain or justify and many who will try and fit in, I think it's part of that way of thinking.

Those threads are a good way of bringing oneself to the attention of similar folk.

I'm off to start a "who's into cheese scones, fresh from the oven with an inch of Lurpack?" thread.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"Some need affirmation and some don't. There are few in these fora who never explain or justify and many who will try and fit in, I think it's part of that way of thinking.

Those threads are a good way of bringing oneself to the attention of similar folk.

I'm off to start a "who's into cheese scones, fresh from the oven with an inch of Lurpack?" thread. "

Have you got any fruit ones?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

There are other people on here ? Why didn't someone tell me?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Some need affirmation and some don't. There are few in these fora who never explain or justify and many who will try and fit in, I think it's part of that way of thinking.

Those threads are a good way of bringing oneself to the attention of similar folk.

I'm off to start a "who's into cheese scones, fresh from the oven with an inch of Lurpack?" thread.

Have you got any fruit ones?"

Ooer Mrs. I have plenty of fruity ones....scones too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Agree with Fabio.

I mean, lets say a chap is 6'2, average build, white and single and asks what sorts of guys people are into, it's hardly as if he can get a height reduction, black up and put on the lbs to suit someone who might be into short tubby black fellas. (No offence to anyone)

Seems to me that such threads are nothing more than a 'look at me' vanity thread."

You do know you cannot say 'tubby'?

You need to say 'calorifically challenged', just so you know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's more of a attention thing I feel. They probably already know that some women/men like their type, they are just looking to attract them on the forum by pointing out what they are.

It is a poor effort, but people can do what they like within the rules."

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies."

Any particular cliff View? I can be on my way in 5

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's more of a attention thing I feel. They probably already know that some women/men like their type, they are just looking to attract them on the forum by pointing out what they are.

It is a poor effort, but people can do what they like within the rules."

I think you have a fair point there and there never seems to be a shortage of people to give an answer although like you said most already know it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies."

Yep! That's true of any group of people though but more so in a competitive environment such as this. It reminds me of the school playground where everyone sides with the most popular regardless of right or wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies.

Yep! That's true of any group of people though but more so in a competitive environment such as this. It reminds me of the school playground where everyone sides with the most popular regardless of right or wrong."

Sad though, isn't it. We are all supposed to be grown up.

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia


"I do wonder that if people are that "fragile" is swinging really for them? "
do make ya wonder don't it

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies.

Any particular cliff View? I can be on my way in 5 "

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies."

as others look on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they aren't asking for their own benefit. Could just be a discussion point for bored or interested people to join in with. Or maybe they are genuinely interested in why people prefer certain things. It looks to me like some start threads to make themselves seem intelligent or interesting. I don't question why people start threads,I don't comment with clever dick condescension on threads to belittle people like some do. The reason being I don't really care

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies.

Yep! That's true of any group of people though but more so in a competitive environment such as this. It reminds me of the school playground where everyone sides with the most popular regardless of right or wrong."

such a good observation, it can be very much like that sometimes on here to the point I can feel really frustrated with some people that I feel are 'playing the forum game'.

That's when I know it's time to take a step back...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"plus there is a overwhelming desire to be part of something, not sure what that something is but sometimes I do think if a few key people were to say let's jump off this cliff'.........

the rocks below would be awash with bodies.

Yep! That's true of any group of people though but more so in a competitive environment such as this. It reminds me of the school playground where everyone sides with the most popular regardless of right or wrong."

I always sided with the underdog at school,I would stick up for the picked on and the popular people were nothing to me. They still are

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

A lot of these thread questions can be answered with a generic "some will, some won't" answer and the majority of answers won't be helpful anyway, either deliberately so (and I have been guilty of this on occasion) or otherwise and I see some threads, as stated above, a poorly disguised phishing ploy. I've always said that if a person is willing to get naked and have sex with a stranger, then they need to be reasonably self confident and have a high level of emotional intelligence.

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