FabSwingers.com forum: when meets go bad

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

what do you do when someone you met a couple of times suddenly turns on you and starts getting possesive? Then when start giving grief back they threaten you (trust me in a mouthy way not to be taken seriously... well i hope not anyway) and won't stop texting saying they're gonna get revenge? ignore or report. If report, who to?

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By *adcowWoman
over a year ago

kirkcaldy

if they threatening you thru the site report to admin. go to their profile then click on report button option.

good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

he's already blocked me so can't access his profile to report him, and it was through text and answerphone messages he threatened me anyhow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"what do you do when someone you met a couple of times suddenly turns on you and starts getting possesive? Then when start giving grief back they threaten you (trust me in a mouthy way not to be taken seriously... well i hope not anyway) and won't stop texting saying they're gonna get revenge? ignore or report. If report, who to?

There is no telling the tone of a text.

Text them and say you don't want any more texts and you find them threatening.

If they've any sense they will stop.

If they don't stop. Get witnesses contact your phone company AND above all else go to the police.

DONT ANSWER ANY TEXTS after texting a request for them to stop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Invite the twat to a hotel for some fun and frolicks, tell him you want to experiment with bondage, tie him to the bed, put your bra and knickers on him - and fookin leave him there for the maids to find! (but take some photos of his shame first to plaster over his home town if he bothers you again)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"he's already blocked me so can't access his profile to report him, and it was through text and answerphone messages he threatened me anyhow

If he has blocked you on site he doesn't want contact.

If he uses the phone dont reply to him.

Too many people ENJOY getting this kind of text and telling people for the attetnion of it. Make sure you are not encouraging him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Invite the twat to a hotel for some fun and frolicks, tell him you want to experiment with bondage, tie him to the bed, put your bra and knickers on him - and fookin leave him there for the maids to find! (but take some photos of his shame first to plaster over his home town if he bothers you again)

Christ..........

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

the major threats were on the phone through voicemail and direct. told him to grow up and move on but he's texting today saying he wants revenge first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no telling the tone of a text.

Text them and say you don't want any more texts and you find them threatening.

If they've any sense they will stop.

If they don't stop. Get witnesses contact your phone company AND above all else go to the police.

DONT ANSWER ANY TEXTS after texting a request for them to stop. "

If its not too inconvenient, change your number. I think you can ask your phone company to block his number, but then again, he can still use another phone.

Report him to the police, you dont know where this is going to.

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By *yber pimpMan
over a year ago

durham area

was thinking of asking you for a meet, but changed my mind now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Report it to the police if they are threatening you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had this a few times, not the threats but the frequent contact when I've not wanted to play, or didn't want to play anymore!

I've just entered into any further communication with them. Texts go unanswered, messages deleted without listening: they soon get bored!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

nervous that reporting it to the police could just aggrevate the situation even more. he threatened me then the next day was asking if i was in a more sensible mood to talk and perhaps shag later. think i found a bit of a psycho, cos as soon as i said it was over he got aggressive again talking about revenge.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I had a very similar situation.

Verbally abusive voicemails and same for texts. He would ring me and I just didnt answer or put it direct thru to voicemail then not listen to them and delete them immediately.

I did go and spek with the local police and they gave me a direct number to complain to if I needed to.

I was also advised by my mobile company to change numbers but I refused to as the man was the one with the problem and why should I go to the inconvience of doing all that.

I decided to text him politely informing him I expected to get no more text,phonecalls or anything from him as had been in touch with the police and that was their advice. I had also given his mobile number to the police and kept note of all texts and voicemails.... and was going to pass all of that to the police which no doubt they would go and have a polite chat with him about it.

I told him all that in a polite to the point text.

It died down after about 3 weeks.

I got stressed everytime my phone rang and felt nervous and frightened.

Its not worth it and you dont deserve it so get in touch with your local police.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"nervous that reporting it to the police could just aggrevate the situation even more. he threatened me then the next day was asking if i was in a more sensible mood to talk and perhaps shag later. think i found a bit of a psycho, cos as soon as i said it was over he got aggressive again talking about revenge.

Oh well if you won't seek help outside of a forum ........ I'll leave you to fate. Tra xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds to em the police are possibly your only real answer.

He feels he has or should have a hold over you, get the police involved and he will have that taken away, the police may also be able to advise you further, especially if he has previous.

failing that, come stay with my partner and I for a little while, you'll have to squash in with us though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wonder if he is reading all this and having a laugh, or taking notes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Revenge... for what?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that crossed my mind too ........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

did yu meet him at your home ?

does he know where you work ?

if not.. nothing to really concern yourself with.

ignore his texts, he will get bored and go back to boardgames, xbox or the world cup.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"I wonder if he is reading all this and having a laugh, or taking notes?"

I would guess both Laine.

Got to say to the OP if it is that bad then I would not hesitate to go to the Police and get them to put an end to it!

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By *eppersCouple
over a year ago

telford

Sorry to read this about you, but in all honesty he is relying on the fact that because your a swinger and the circumstances of the meet etc, that you will be too embarrassed to go to the police,

The don't care what you get upto the fact of the matter ub=nder the laws governing telecommunications he is committing an offence so keep all messages and voice mails and go to the police.

secondly use a pay as you mobile no just for swinging.

hope everything gets sorted quickly.

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By *ddiddyMan
over a year ago

kilkenny

well firstly set up a new account on here just to report him to addmin then if that dosent work get a few friends to ask him very firmly in person to back off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Report to admin and block!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

asked him myself revenge for what. just had another friend on here told me he wouldn't take no for an answer on meeting him again and she blocked him on msn. he knows where i live and he told me about his shady past before which is why i'm nervous about contacing the police. i'm hoping he's all mouth but you never know.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"well firstly set up a new account on here just to report him to addmin then if that dosent work get a few friends to ask him very firmly in person to back off "

You dont need to set up a new account to report any profile, even if you have them blocked or they have blocked you.

Open the profile in question and click on the "Report User" button that is still there on the left hand side of the page (looking at the screen

) saying you can't view this profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

thanks to all who have offered advice through here or pm's. 90% of the swinging community are fantastic and i've made some friends for life on here. it's nice to know i'm not alone.

I think it's time to put a stop to this bully doing it to anyone else. Needs taking down a peg or two eh guys? Just needed to know i wasn't being a wuss by involving police

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"asked him myself revenge for what. just had another friend on here told me he wouldn't take no for an answer on meeting him again and she blocked him on msn. he knows where i live and he told me about his shady past before which is why i'm nervous about contacing the police. i'm hoping he's all mouth but you never know."

That should be the very reason you should NOT be put off going to the police .... and btw, posting on here (as he is also a member) that you don't want to go to the police is pretty much giving him a green light.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"thanks to all who have offered advice through here or pm's......

..... Needs taking down a peg or two eh guys? "

And the undertone of that was my other thought on the matter.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"thanks to all who have offered advice through here or pm's......

..... Needs taking down a peg or two eh guys?

And the undertone of that was my other thought on the matter."

sorry for my ignorance but i'm not sure what you mean by that....?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sounds like he needs his balls for earings

then go 2 the police

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

"thanks to all who have offered advice through here or pm's......

..... Needs taking down a peg or two eh guys?

And the undertone of that was my other thought on the matter.

sorry for my ignorance but i'm not sure what you mean by that....?"

Well let's say someone (a female) was feeling a bit vindictive towards a guy (for whatever reason)… how could they use the site to work against a guy who has blocked them?

Well they could write what a bastard the guy is on their profile… but they might end up look like a bit of a bunny boiler then; and it could go against them as much as work for them…. especially if he finds out and reports the profile.

So they ‘could’ post a very one sided story… gather up some support, start talking to people via pm, where there are no restrictions on naming and shaming, and really put the boot in and put people off of meeting him… with him being none the wiser if he doesn’t look at the forums.

But as I said it was just a thought.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

I thought the Undertones sung "Teenage Kicks"!

You learn something new here everyday!

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By *xstephbxxCouple
over a year ago

hyde

At the point where he said he wants revenge, contact the police. Don't think for a second you are the 1st person who has had to speak to them about this kinda thing because sadly i now happens on a weekly basis. We have a friend who is in the police force and knows we swing. Without him mentioning any names or anything he has told us about the things hat get reported to his station and the incidents he has had to deal with discretely.

Trust me, they are the ones to turn to before something happens, it comes under the heading of call his bluff because he obviously thinks you are in fact ' alone ' in all this.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Even if someone has you blocked on the site, you can still click on their profile and to the left where the menu bar normally is, there will be a REPORT button.

If someone is harrasing/ threatening you on the site, then use that button.

If someone is harrasing/ threatening you away from the site, then you need to contact the relevant authorities...the police being the obvious solution and then your phone provider to block any calls or texts if your phone doesn't have that option.

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