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Vanilla dating

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Why is it you agree to 'date' then get questioned about what you have done. I know this is not a dating site but having looked at the forums a lot of people are not adverse to the idea and you already know that intimacy is important or that you have high sex drives. So why then do people get arsey about whether you have met anyone if you have not agreed to be exclusive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

human natures a funny old thing. I suppose you could feel flattered that they are interested.

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By *lan43sumMan
over a year ago

Leicester


"human natures a funny old thing. I suppose you could feel flattered that they are interested. "

A great question/observation from the OP.

I take a lot from the forums on here and often wonder how many shades of grey there are between the 100% monogamous sex at one extreme and the "ffs I have an itch..anyone want to scratch it" at the other.

In the 20-40s age group 100% monogamy is nature's ideal isn't it? In the 60s to 80s...ermm who knows?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"human natures a funny old thing. I suppose you could feel flattered that they are interested.

A great question/observation from the OP.

I take a lot from the forums on here and often wonder how many shades of grey there are between the 100% monogamous sex at one extreme and the "ffs I have an itch..anyone want to scratch it" at the other.

In the 20-40s age group 100% monogamy is nature's ideal isn't it? In the 60s to 80s...ermm who knows?"

I don't think monogamy has ever been nature's ideal.... Society maybe but not nature's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am 22 have no desire to be in a relationship and couldn't give a monkeys who meets who. I only get bugged when someone cancels a meet with me then I notice they've met another person. especially if a lie has been told 100% honesty with me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooo.. I can put my little mark on this one.. Been here myself!! It was never about who they were meeting it was more about the way they went bout it.. Sex is sex and it didn't bother me who they met... My issue was they went behind my back and didn't tell me who they were seeing and even lied and denied the meet... On more then one occasion cancelled our meet because a better offer came along and then expected me to be ok with it... I think if you have an open relationship then that's what it should be.. But some guidelines need to be addressed so each party know where they stand... Talking from experience; its not that easy when emotions get in the way... I have never experienced jealousy before until i started a swinging relationship... And its an emotion i hope i never have to injure again

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ooo.. I can put my little mark on this one.. Been here myself!! It was never about who they were meeting it was more about the way they went bout it.. Sex is sex and it didn't bother me who they met... My issue was they went behind my back and didn't tell me who they were seeing and even lied and denied the meet... On more then one occasion cancelled our meet because a better offer came along and then expected me to be ok with it... I think if you have an open relationship then that's what it should be.. But some guidelines need to be addressed so each party know where they stand... Talking from experience; its not that easy when emotions get in the way... I have never experienced jealousy before until i started a swinging relationship... And its an emotion i hope i never have to injure again "

Jealously is awful to either suffer from it

Personally or the person you are with being jealous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooo.. I can put my little mark on this one.. Been here myself!! It was never about who they were meeting it was more about the way they went bout it.. Sex is sex and it didn't bother me who they met... My issue was they went behind my back and didn't tell me who they were seeing and even lied and denied the meet... On more then one occasion cancelled our meet because a better offer came along and then expected me to be ok with it... I think if you have an open relationship then that's what it should be.. But some guidelines need to be addressed so each party know where they stand... Talking from experience; its not that easy when emotions get in the way... I have never experienced jealousy before until i started a swinging relationship... And its an emotion i hope i never have to injure again "

I don't need to know who they have met either but it can be annoying when they cancel because they aren't so keen to meet you after the first few meetings. you just think why bother its easier to just meet other men instead, less complicated from the sound of it too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"human natures a funny old thing. I suppose you could feel flattered that they are interested.

A great question/observation from the OP.

I take a lot from the forums on here and often wonder how many shades of grey there are between the 100% monogamous sex at one extreme and the "ffs I have an itch..anyone want to scratch it" at the other.

In the 20-40s age group 100% monogamy is nature's ideal isn't it? In the 60s to 80s...ermm who knows?

I don't think monogamy has ever been nature's ideal.... Society maybe but not nature's "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people want a fb, They do like been a friends with the fun bits. And you do get people who care about their friends ( Dont mean the inlove way)

Plus Some people are possesive

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By *onbons_xxMan
over a year ago

Bolton

For me it maybe comes down to honesty, trust and therefore respect for each other. The nature of the site shouldn't detract from that but I may be being a little naive.

So long as everyone is on the same page I think that helps ....sometimes it's like they're not even on the same chapter though!

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