FabSwingers.com forum: Manners cost nothing

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends what you class as manners I would say 90%+ have manners here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people think manners are only for relationships I think. Like because this is a sex site manners aren't needed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Even a no thanks is better than nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely. The only time I won't respond at all is when the person hasn't done two simple things I ask in my profile which is must be verified, and must send a face pic, because it shows they either haven't read it or just ignoring neither impress me. But it may be different for a man :/

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

I suppose it HAS been a while since we've had one of these threads...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing "

Ahhhhhhh you mean in replying to messages!

So junk mail through your do do you ring up every company who sends you one? After all its rude not to reply!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing

Ahhhhhhh you mean in replying to messages!

So junk mail through your do do you ring up every company who sends you one? After all its rude not to reply!

There's a junk mail box on here??????? Not seen that one

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing

Ahhhhhhh you mean in replying to messages!

So junk mail through your do do you ring up every company who sends you one? After all its rude not to reply!

It's clear in the site faq it's not rude to not reply.

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

It could be your asking the wrong questions. Just a thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing

Ahhhhhhh you mean in replying to messages!

So junk mail through your do do you ring up every company who sends you one? After all its rude not to reply!

There's a junk mail box on here??????? Not seen that one"

The companies who mail you trying to get your interest don't see it as junk mail so again do you reply to every piece or mail sent to you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing

Ahhhhhhh you mean in replying to messages!

So junk mail through your do do you ring up every company who sends you one? After all its rude not to reply!

It's clear in the site faq it's not rude to not reply.

The reality is first messages are unsolicited messages no different from what comes through your door so its not rude to reply. It is petulant to whinge about it though and doesn't put anyone in a good light.

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By *uitar_antiheroMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

1 message in your inbox - easy to reply to.

5 messages in your inbox - *sigh* better reply

10 messages in your inbox - one word replies

50 messages in your inbox - skim them, reply to a couple

100 messages in your inbox - who even are these people?!?! *mass delete*

You'd do that, I'd do that, why would a woman who has other things to do away from fab be any different? They're not being rude, they're being "human"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But of course us women should reply to EVERY message, no matter what it says, just because someone has taken 10 seconds to send us one, god forbid we are arrogant and rude!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But of course us women should reply to EVERY message, no matter what it says, just because someone has taken 10 seconds to send us one, god forbid we are arrogant and rude!

Errr it goes for guys too you know not just women! I have been known not to reply to messages and nobody should have to reply if they don't want.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I suppose it HAS been a while since we've had one of these threads..."

Yes, it must be a few hours, at least

OP, a no reply is a no thanks, or at least an I'm not interested at the moment.

Nobody is owed anything on here. You're not in anyone else's shoes to be able to understand why they do or do not reply.

It's more arrogant to think that decisions you made (to send messages) should be able to dictate how others must behave and use their time.

I'll never understand how getting numerous written rejections is better. You're still not getting a meet.

You don't know why someone didn't reply. There are lots of reasons other than arrogance. It's pretty rude and petulant to insult people because they didn't do what you wanted.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"1 message in your inbox - easy to reply to.

5 messages in your inbox - *sigh* better reply

10 messages in your inbox - one word replies

50 messages in your inbox - skim them, reply to a couple

100 messages in your inbox - who even are these people?!?! *mass delete*

You'd do that, I'd do that, why would a woman who has other things to do away from fab be any different? They're not being rude, they're being "human""

Quite.

Time is valuable. I'd rather use mine chatting to those I am interested in than writing a load of "no, thank you" messages, especially when a lot of the messages I get are from men who haven't read/have ignored my profile.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

"OP, a no reply is a no thanks, or at least an I'm not interested at the moment.

Nobody is owed anything on here. You're not in anyone else's shoes to be able to understand why they do or do not reply.

It's more arrogant to think that decisions you made (to send messages) should be able to dictate how others must behave and use their time.

I'll never understand how getting numerous written rejections is better. You're still not getting a meet.

You don't know why someone didn't reply. There are lots of reasons other than arrogance. It's pretty rude and petulant to insult people because they didn't do what you wanted."

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing "

Really?

So if you'd sent 50 messages and woke up next day to 50 'No thanks' that would make you feel much better?

Somehow - I honestly doubt that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/08/14 01:27:18]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive answered all my messages today except one which consisted of 'hi' so I'm arrogant, slapped wrist for sheri

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing

Really?

So if you'd sent 50 messages and woke up next day to 50 'No thanks' that would make you feel much better?

Somehow - I honestly doubt that.

The next moan would be why do people judge from a message and a profile? Why won't they chat a bit, get to know the person and give them a chance? Or why won't they meet and give someone a chance since it's difficult to get your personality across in a profile and messages? And why be so blunt as to just say "no thanks"?

Some people seem to think it's only fair they are given enough chances to win over those they are interested in. Their ego can't accept that someone in whom they are interested, isn't interested in return.

A better example than the junk mail one is to ask if they message people they aren't interested in, (perhaps to give them that fair chance). The answer is of course they don't. So why would they expect different from anyone else?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use to aswer all messages but because i get quite a few and got pissed off with abuse of some of them when saying sorry your not my type, i just delete now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few "

Hi Chancer, no thanks.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"A better example than the junk mail one is to ask if they message people they aren't interested in, (perhaps to give them that fair chance). The answer is of course they don't. So why would they expect different from anyone else? "

Love it!

(Might have to steal that for future use!

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I suppose it HAS been a while since we've had one of these threads..."

If you call 2 days a while lol.

OP if somebody does not reply to your email it is not rude. Would getting a no thanks email really make you feel better than not getting a reply?

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

I read every word of every letter that comes through our door. Then I sit down and craft a well thought out reply to each explaining why I don't want their windows/insurance/pizza etc. Doing this takes up about 4 hours every day and makes my life complete.

Oh wait

No I don't

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing "

Take nothing as a "No thanks" then you will be able to rest at ease

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks but no thanks. Takes less than 30 seconds to write

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Thanks but no thanks. Takes less than 30 seconds to write"

Takes even less time to view a profile, realise they've not read your profile at all, know you'll never be interested - and delete the message before opening.

And block.

And if it hurts somebody's feelings, dents their ego or doesn't meet their expectancy level - then I'd suggest they need to reevaluate their attitude to a site where complete strangers can message each other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can see that the OP has had a few verifications and meets, so actually, despite the ratio of meets to replies you make, it would seem to me that you're doing ok on here compared to your peers!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few "

Yes but we can be arrogant because we're fucking awesome and way better than most people on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We reply when we can. But what you have to realise is both the sheer number you get and then when you do reply to the negative you get the inevitable why won't you meet me messages etc etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks but no thanks. Takes less than 30 seconds to write"

A single female friend of my joined here the other day and has had nearly 300 messages. You really can not reply to every one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If there was as much energy and thought put into messages as there is in the gripes about not replying then I'm sure more of us would reply. We don't reply if we don't feel like it, our choice, deal with it and move on!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks but no thanks. Takes less than 30 seconds to write

A single female friend of my joined here the other day and has had nearly 300 messages. You really can not reply to every one. "

Wow really? I've never had that volume of messages heance why I do ##feeling unpopular

lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If there was as much energy and thought put into messages as there is in the gripes about not replying then I'm sure more of us would reply. We don't reply if we don't feel like it, our choice, deal with it and move on!!"

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing

Really?

So if you'd sent 50 messages and woke up next day to 50 'No thanks' that would make you feel much better?

Somehow - I honestly doubt that.

This is an excellent summary but it won't stop determined moaners from seeing it only from their own perspective which is the real arrogance here.

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By *eithoWoman
over a year ago

Chatham

If i replied to a married man on here betraying his wife it certainly wouldn't be a polite 'no thanks'. If I were you I'd be grateful people simply don't reply to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the problem here is that by not replying it cuts all communication off.

People are happier with a no thanks as that will then allow them to send another mail asking why. So you inform them why and they send another trying to persuade you to change your mind.

So rather than go through all that crap we choose the first option of not replying.

There are exceptions like any rule. If they have obviously read profile and send a decent mail we do reply.

But to be honest dont see many of them. Most say free now fancy a fuck. How could we resist such well written mails

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

I think I 've awoken in a parallel universe this very same topic was covered only hours ago,,

No reply = no meet

no thanks = no meet

Instead of reading your no thanks messages use the time productively to seek those that say 'yes please'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks but no thanks. Takes less than 30 seconds to write

Takes even less time to view a profile, realise they've not read your profile at all, know you'll never be interested - and delete the message before opening.

And block.

Excellent response! Sums it up beautifully

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By *nigmatic1Woman
over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

"1 message in your inbox - easy to reply to.

5 messages in your inbox - *sigh* better reply

10 messages in your inbox - one word replies

50 messages in your inbox - skim them, reply to a couple

100 messages in your inbox - who even are these people?!?! *mass delete*

You'd do that, I'd do that, why would a woman who has other things to do away from fab be any different? They're not being rude, they're being "human""

This

thank you for your support and understanding

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You say manners cost nothing but the kids next door had a Nanny, went to public school and then finishing school. £80k per child over 15 years it cost. posh bastards!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will never understand the need that some people have to see rejection spelled out. Would a no thanks really make a difference to your life?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I will never understand the need that some people have to see rejection spelled out. Would a no thanks really make a difference to your life?"
I would always hurt coming off those sexy eyes xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even a no thanks is better than nothing "

So it's more about entitlement than perceived manners?

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

"I suppose it HAS been a while since we've had one of these threads...

If you call 2 days a while lol.

OP if somebody does not reply to your email it is not rude. Would getting a no thanks email really make you feel better than not getting a reply? "

2 days is pretty impressive, lol. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What annoys me is when someone is advertising for a meet and you send them a message and they read it and don't reply, it's just plain rude. And can make you feel worthless.

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By *ordonBennettMan
over a year ago

dover

"I suppose it HAS been a while since we've had one of these threads...

If you call 2 days a while lol.

OP if somebody does not reply to your email it is not rude. Would getting a no thanks email really make you feel better than not getting a reply?

2 days is pretty impressive, lol. x"

I wonder how many do actually research previous threads on this topic where you'll find identical questions answered by identical answers with identical advice.

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By *issy louWoman
over a year ago

Staffordshire Moorlands

It always makes me wonder on these threads - why are you even spending the time moaning and whining about the people who by not replying are making it obvious they aren't interested? Why not concentrate your time and effort on the ones that DO want to meet you??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few "

You mispelt women... Arrogant women not people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spin it around,why not say...Isn't it great there are some lovely people on fab? instead of having the manners cost nothing groundhog day thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few

You mispelt women... Arrogant women not people

Haha got a death wish today?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few

You mispelt women... Arrogant women not people

That's right. Not one arrogant man on here at all. Never.

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

"A lot of arrogant people on here, thank god for the friendly few

You mispelt women... Arrogant women not people

Ha ! Good luck from now on

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