FabSwingers.com forum: Anyone have bigger balls??

By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

Than me?

I have just caught and released a spider to fucking big, I had to use a bloody Tupperware container!

The thing was in my friikkken bedroom!

It came from behind my radiator!

WHERE MY BATH TOWEL IS!!!!!!!!!

faaaaaaaaaaaaaak! I could have had been drying myself in the morning on that fuck!

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

*a spider so fucking big

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Yes, my balls are bigger. I've had a mouse in my hair that was in my towel.

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

this shit was the size on my fucking palm! fak a duck!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"this shit was the size on my fucking palm! fak a duck!"

I had a ginormous one sitting on my toilet seat. When you've got to go you've got to go.

They do seem to be really large at the moment. I have to break through a web at my front door every morning to leave the house.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had a 100 people attend one of my balls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've bigger balls..cos I leave them alone(and take pics of them)

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I've had a 100 people attend one of my balls "

Is that because you only have the one?

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By *atsnCorsetsCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I had a ginormous one sitting on my toilet seat. When you've got to go you've got to go.

They do seem to be really large at the moment. I have to break through a web at my front door every morning to leave the house.

We've noticed more of them about! Thankfully we've a fully trained Spidey Slayer of a cat. You shout "Spider!" And she will not rest until she's eaten it. She's a heck of a climber too!

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

Yeap... A cornered mouse jumped ( yeap jumped!!) from the floor.. onto my left tit, over my shoulder and off to the floor behind me! My balls so big i got a wheelbarrow! (Mrs!)

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I've bigger balls..cos I leave them alone(and take pics of them)"

There is no way you leave your balls alone but I'm quite prepared to believe you take pictures of them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got Swedish meatballs

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"I've bigger balls..cos I leave them alone(and take pics of them)"

I did actually take a pic of it ... I'd never be believed - so I'm gonna scare the shit out of a few tomorrow ... wwwwwwwwwuuuuuuuuuurrrrghhhhhhhrrrrr

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

I've been bitten (repeatedly) by a rat as I tried to extracate it from a Fenn trap.....

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"I had a ginormous one sitting on my toilet seat. When you've got to go you've got to go.

They do seem to be really large at the moment. I have to break through a web at my front door every morning to leave the house.

We've noticed more of them about! Thankfully we've a fully trained Spidey Slayer of a cat. You shout "Spider!" And she will not rest until she's eaten it. She's a heck of a climber too!"

I need one, this shit waited till I was comfy then thought it's take a bloody stroll. Only took a few steps and it was 6ft up!

Arsehole bit is trying to wrestle a spider in a dressing gown that isn't tied properly uerrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!! dont know how I didnt fucking cry!

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"Yeap... A cornered mouse jumped ( yeap jumped!!) from the floor.. onto my left tit, over my shoulder and off to the floor behind me! My balls so big i got a wheelbarrow! (Mrs!)

pmsl ... creepy bastard things!

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

So not a man - eating tiger? Great White shark? Grizzly bear?

Nope. Little incey wincey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey, at least it came first... Even if it was behind the radiator

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"Hey, at least it came first... Even if it was behind the radiator

have to say, it put my wank right off

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

Dude........it's just a spider....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have cried and moved out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I bet it's whole family live behind your bed... Mum dad... Siblings, aunts uncles... And cousins twice removed.

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

I had the fear, it subsided around 2:30am and guess what? It's just returned!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would have cried and moved out "

Leaving most of my possessions so it didn't hitch a ride.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had the fear, it subsided around 2:30am and guess what? It's just returned!

If it had a suitcase, it's definately moving in

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By *aceytopWoman
over a year ago

from a town near you

iv cleared dead smelly rats out from under the floorboards when three hunky men couldn't,one was actualy sick,now thems what you call balls

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

A boa constrictor bit my face and I didn't even notice till someone pointed out I have blood running down my cheek

I'm well 'ard me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A friend of mine has 23 tarantulas and 2 bearded dragons. I look after them while he's away on holiday, they're fun to handle but it frikkin hurts when one bites...

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By *aceytopWoman
over a year ago

from a town near you

"A friend of mine has 23 tarantulas and 2 bearded dragons. I look after them while he's away on holiday, they're fun to handle but it frikkin hurts when one bites..."
you win!! 23 tarantulas

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I got Swedish meatballs

A pack of six? ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A friend of mine has 23 tarantulas and 2 bearded dragons. I look after them while he's away on holiday, they're fun to handle but it frikkin hurts when one bites...you win!! 23 tarantulas"

Two of them cant be handled as their bite is quite nasty, the others are fine it just leaves you a bit numb.

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

I'd rather give my thumb to the homeless than a tarantula

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"I'd rather give my thumb to the homeless than a tarantula "

Why would you give your thumb to a tarantula?

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I cant rest is spiders are in the house, they give me the right heebeejeebee`s, shivering at the thought and the memeory of getting out the shower and drying myself off to feel something tickling my arm, thought it was a hair till I looked down and there it was crawling up my arm, I proper freaked out and my ex came running up the stairs as he thought I had had an accident or something

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bending over washing the youngest's hair in the bath the other night and had a spider lower it's self right by my eye

Not sure who screamed louder me or the kids

Funny thing was it's always me that catches the things and puts them out

As others have said they seam to be lots bigger this year

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, my balls are bigger. I've had a mouse in my hair that was in my towel.

lol xxx

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

ITS BACK!

How am I not supposed to swear! SHIT ME!

fakkin bollox - they are scary bastard things.

If it comes back a 3rd time - I'm twatting it.

(and it brought a friend)

bastard. oooooph

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

Anyone know any spider remedies?

concers in your windows or something .... but it's not the season for em!

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

Plain flour

Butter

Caster sugar.

Dismembered spider

Oh, sorry. You said remedy not recipe.

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

I might put some kind of tape on my ledge or something. No idea why or HOW they are attracted to MY 2" window gap, 20ft up a wall!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once took a crap and a frog came out of the bowl.

hate frogs ever since!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a beach ball!

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"I might put some kind of tape on my ledge or something. No idea why or HOW they are attracted to MY 2" window gap, 20ft up a wall!"

Old-fashioned fly paper?

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"I once took a crap and a frog came out of the bowl.

hate frogs ever since!"

lmfao .. that would be something!

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"I might put some kind of tape on my ledge or something. No idea why or HOW they are attracted to MY 2" window gap, 20ft up a wall!

Old-fashioned fly paper? "

mmmm but fuck. what a bloody cheek! It will decorate my wall if it comes back

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

That's nothing, Toshn slayed a dragon or a griffin or a moth last year

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I once took a crap and a frog came out of the bowl.

hate frogs ever since!"

Sounds like you ate one before you went

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By *oodmess OP Man
over a year ago

yumsville

"That's nothing, Toshn slayed a dragon or a griffin or a moth last year

David Attenborough would cease going to the Galapagos Islands if he knew the species in my bloody room!

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By *heOwlMan
over a year ago

Altrincham

Got a couple of itsy bitseys living here, I employ then to take care of the flies. They appear to be quite happy.

Now me wee pyranah, well that was a bit of a tought nut, or at least it was until it's pal ate it

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