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Self confidence.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have many of times skipped passed profiles and felt the same also.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't wanna meet you because you have hot pics and I would feel intimidated . But I know you are really nice so I would lol

Someone who puts themselves down all time is a turn off , even though I know I do it myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can relate to that lady. Absolutely. Ive turned down meets because of guys who I thought were 'out of my league'.

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

It def puts me off..

I like confident people, although there is a very very fine line between confidence and arrogance.

People who continually put themselves down, whether it's due to genuine lack of confidence or whether it's fishing for compliments, I tire of very quickly and won't choose to spend time with them.

I know everyone has bad days with their self confidence, but I'm talking about the constant offenders.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes lots of times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can relate to that lady. Absolutely. Ive turned down meets because of guys who I thought were 'out of my league'.

"

same here xx.

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Oops... wasnt finished typing..

There are many guys who's profiles and pics I see and think Wow... If they're local and I seem to match what they're looking for I'll mail them.

If they say no (or delete without reply) I can cope! I don't have fear of rejection and my own self confidence can take it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

Ejay god handcarved you hisself mate! i bet loads of women are i timidated by the look of your body. ive heard loads of women say how goodlooking you are and you seem like a really nice bloke so i bet that you do lose a fair few because they imagine that you wouldnt look at them mate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not confident about certain areas of my body at all but if a hot guy wants to meet me, I would definitely not decline because he was too good looking. Just because my body isn't great doesn't mean I won't be an enjoyable meet x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldn't wanna meet you because you have hot pics and I would feel intimidated . But I know you are really nice so I would lol

Someone who puts themselves down all time is a turn off , even though I know I do it myself "

I've been put off by people saying how they can't find meets, no one wants them etc etc

But being intimidated by another profile, I thought I was alone on than one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Many times I am afraid... I have been messaged by athletic couples and said, "I am flattered, but I am not your type" To the OP, you have a fine body (nothing bi or gay intended), I would feel intimidated in your presence in a MMF situation, though I am sure you are a relaxed nice guy.

These days I look at their verifications and if I ain't up to what they are used to, I pass quickly by (after fabbing a pic or two)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If someone wants to meet you how can you be out of their league or not good enough purely on the basis of what they look like?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can relate to that lady. Absolutely. Ive turned down meets because of guys who I thought were 'out of my league'.

same here xx."

And were the guys sympathetic? Did they think you were being daft?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"
I'm a big girl and can handle rejection. If I liked someone I woukd message them.

Iv had guys away from fab say I'm intimidating and I ask why as I'm totally confused, I never look for compliments and when I get them I get embarrassed but, say Thankyou.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But on the other hand I have met ladies on here and have dates to meet others who I never thought I would stand a chance with . So I will never say never

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I did but not now....I just think fuck it I'll message them.....I am strong enough to take rejection on the chin

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

Loads of times, mainly through not being good enough for someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is there more to life other than being really really ridiculously good looking?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone wants to meet you how can you be out of their league or not good enough purely on the basis of what they look like?

"

Because of my own insecurities I think, rightly or wrongly, someone I consider good looking isn't really going to be interested in a plain jane like me. What I don't do though is bang on about it and do woe is me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dislike arrogant people but dislike people who put themselves down all the time too. I havnt got much confidence but I don't take myself too seriously and it doesn't put me off meeting very attractive men if I think they are nice people as I don't think attractive people are any better than less attractive people.

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By *eedelightsWoman
over a year ago

London

Many out of my league. And with a few things has knocked my confidence in a big way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep, I've rejected people, especially couples, on this basis. I don't think it's lack of self confidence as such, just being realistic and if I was with someone with an exceptionally gym chiselled body it would make me feel like a right porky lazy bastard!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats when i generally send a wee wink

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

god i do that all the time, i even do it if they mail me first, i have a terrible habit of deciding for people if they will like me or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loads of times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My confidence is high, cos I got a buff body with a 6pack .

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"If someone wants to meet you how can you be out of their league or not good enough purely on the basis of what they look like?

Because of my own insecurities I think, rightly or wrongly, someone I consider good looking isn't really going to be interested in a plain jane like me. What I don't do though is bang on about it and do woe is me. "

I see. I sometimes feel the same way about people who are very intelligent or well read .....daft isn't it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say it's always with a view of the guys in a couple or the guys in a ladies verifications. If they are chiselled and toned gents, then I guess that I am not going to be the ladies type and won't trouble them. Having said that I have met many wonderful ladies who appreciate a "slight" framed man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I first came on here I did not take rejection well . But now if someone thinks they are too good for me . I think " Well maybe I was to good for them anyway " . Works for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would say it's always with a view of the guys in a couple or the guys in a ladies verifications. If they are chiselled and toned gents, then I guess that I am not going to be the ladies type and won't trouble them. Having said that I have met many wonderful ladies who appreciate a "slight" framed man.

"

I do this too...if all their verifications are from petite slim women it kind of puts me off going there because I don't want the unfavourable comparison!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone wants to meet you how can you be out of their league or not good enough purely on the basis of what they look like?

Because of my own insecurities I think, rightly or wrongly, someone I consider good looking isn't really going to be interested in a plain jane like me. What I don't do though is bang on about it and do woe is me. "

Same here well the plain jane bit so am always amazed when a good looking man fancies me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone wants to meet you how can you be out of their league or not good enough purely on the basis of what they look like?

Because of my own insecurities I think, rightly or wrongly, someone I consider good looking isn't really going to be interested in a plain jane like me. What I don't do though is bang on about it and do woe is me.

I see. I sometimes feel the same way about people who are very intelligent or well read .....daft isn't it "

Yes its daft

But an interesting thread all the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't wanna meet you because you have hot pics and I would feel intimidated . But I know you are really nice so I would lol

Someone who puts themselves down all time is a turn off , even though I know I do it myself

I've been put off by people saying how they can't find meets, no one wants them etc etc

But being intimidated by another profile, I thought I was alone on than one "

Nope you're not alone, I have certainly been to worried about rejection to mail some people, there are a couple of guys who post on the forum who make my stomach knott and my toes tingle.

Stupidly I might not be Marilyn Monroe but I know I can hold my own against most women in the flesh, it's getting that across online I struggle with.

A minor disfigurement does not help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't wanna meet you because you have hot pics and I would feel intimidated . But I know you are really nice so I would lol

Someone who puts themselves down all time is a turn off , even though I know I do it myself

I've been put off by people saying how they can't find meets, no one wants them etc etc

But being intimidated by another profile, I thought I was alone on than one

Nope you're not alone, I have certainly been to worried about rejection to mail some people, there are a couple of guys who post on the forum who make my stomach knott and my toes tingle.

Stupidly I might not be Marilyn Monroe but I know I can hold my own against most women in the flesh, it's getting that across online I struggle with.

A minor disfigurement does not help "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have body image and confidence issues so I'm always intimidated by any gorgeous man that message and often can't believe my luck when they genuinely want to meet me

I'm getting better though and the last few social meets I've had have made a huge difference

I've not had the confidence to message anyone with a view to meet - yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

Is a shame when it happens but there is little you can do about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My confidence is high, cos I got a buff body with a 6pack ."
You should mention your 6 pack more mate

I don't think people realise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have body image and confidence issues so I'm always intimidated by any gorgeous man that message and often can't believe my luck when they genuinely want to meet me

I'm getting better though and the last few social meets I've had have made a huge difference

I've not had the confidence to message anyone with a view to meet - yet "
Awww thanks lol

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

I've never been put off by looks... "he who dares, Rodney"...

Although the way I am wired means that I am incapable of messaging people in a sensible/usual manner relating to their profile, I have to find something (maybe a status) to be sarcastic about/take the piss etc and I'm positive it has lost me meets, but I'm not going to lose any sleep over it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes all the time.. After reading their profile and looking at their pics I check out the people they have met... If they are all slender younger women it screams out to me that's their preference and I won't meet.. Not because I'm not confident, I feel that they are only asking coz it's available.. And if there was a slender woman offering I wouldn't be in the picture... Happened to many times in the clubs ... Good job I have broad shoulders and don't offend easy

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By *iguy39Man
over a year ago

manchester

I have felt like that loads of times. What I tend to do is be a bit brash and make out that they are the luckiest person in the world to get a message from me. Most of the time they ignore me! You have to remember that we are all on here for a reason, including beautiful girls. I'm a chewed up, dog eared old mutt! But some women like that!

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By *Kgirl80Woman
over a year ago

South Coast

In my day to day life, I consider myself to be a confident woman, but when it comes to exchanging photos and chatting on here, I get really nervous.

I'm smart enough to know that we can't all be attractive to everyone, but it just feels a little like setting yourself up to fail. I rarely message first, for this reason

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By *iguy39Man
over a year ago

manchester


"I have many of times skipped passed profiles and felt the same also. "
Your one of those rare people, nice person and modest and thoughful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is me making a massively sweeping generalisation here, but I think it tends to be women who are put off/intimidated meeting someone they think to be out of their league, more than men. Like I'll take good pictures then find myself talking myself down when chatting to someone so I don't leave them disappointed when they meet me in real life. Whereas I've found a lot of men will exaggerate their...charms...

Again...I know this is a total generalisation and not everyone is like this!

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford


"In my day to day life, I consider myself to be a confident woman, but when it comes to exchanging photos and chatting on here, I get really nervous.

I'm smart enough to know that we can't all be attractive to everyone, but it just feels a little like setting yourself up to fail. I rarely message first, for this reason "

I don't reckon you've got anything to worry about, myself....

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By *iguy39Man
over a year ago

manchester

[Removed by poster at 10/08/14 21:24:17]

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By *iguy39Man
over a year ago

manchester


"This is me making a massively sweeping generalisation here, but I think it tends to be women who are put off/intimidated meeting someone they think to be out of their league, more than men. Like I'll take good pictures then find myself talking myself down when chatting to someone so I don't leave them disappointed when they meet me in real life. Whereas I've found a lot of men will exaggerate their...charms...I tend to do myself down too, it's a very English thing to do

Again...I know this is a total generalisation and not everyone is like this! "
I tend to do myself down too, it's a very English thing to do

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By *Kgirl80Woman
over a year ago

South Coast


"In my day to day life, I consider myself to be a confident woman, but when it comes to exchanging photos and chatting on here, I get really nervous.

I'm smart enough to know that we can't all be attractive to everyone, but it just feels a little like setting yourself up to fail. I rarely message first, for this reason

I don't reckon you've got anything to worry about, myself.... "

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better change my profile name then and profile in general lol!

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I contact anyone I like the look of or like the way they speak in the forum or by what they have written in their profile. I'll only get ignored if I'm not their type for any reason. I think even the most fantastic looking people like compliments on occasion so I give them out too.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

No. There are some people who I wouldn't contact because they aren't into TG, as opposed to wouldn't be into me personally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would say it's always with a view of the guys in a couple or the guys in a ladies verifications. If they are chiselled and toned gents, then I guess that I am not going to be the ladies type and won't trouble them. Having said that I have met many wonderful ladies who appreciate a "slight" framed man.

I do this too...if all their verifications are from petite slim women it kind of puts me off going there because I don't want the unfavourable comparison! "

I'm the same when I see that all their verifications are of men 6 ft plus,

I just move on

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/08/14 21:56:03]

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have many of times skipped passed profiles and felt the same also.

Your one of those rare people, nice person and modest and thoughful"

Thanks mate. Very nice of you to say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you connect you connect..

I dont worry....

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

There is always a little bit of me that thinks 'God, they're going to run a mile when they see me in real life' but I man up and ignore that little voice most of the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is always a little bit of me that thinks 'God, they're going to run a mile when they see me in real life' but I man up and ignore that little voice most of the time."

I'm well acquainted with that voice, myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

Yes... I don't think so I would dare to go for a meet with you.. Many great pics and body..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If there is someone i really want to meet, then i'd get myself out there and try and get that meet. At least i can say i gave it my all.

I just don't like profiles where someone gives out the vibes of being arrogant. I may be wrong in the tone that i sense from these profiles but arrogance certainly does put me off.

I'm not here to jump through hoops for a meet. You either like me for me, or you just move on to the next profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is me making a massively sweeping generalisation here, but I think it tends to be women who are put off/intimidated meeting someone they think to be out of their league, more than men. Like I'll take good pictures then find myself talking myself down when chatting to someone so I don't leave them disappointed when they meet me in real life. Whereas I've found a lot of men will exaggerate their...charms...I tend to do myself down too, it's a very English thing to do

Again...I know this is a total generalisation and not everyone is like this! I tend to do myself down too, it's a very English thing to do"

Hmm yeah you're right there.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

No, never, but then I've met some gorgeous men on POF and on here, and I never go hunting anyway. So if they approach me, I already know they are interested! Easy peasy!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

What I've learnt from this thread is a woman could skip a profile and feel like she isn't good enough. She would show up on the recent viewed list but the guy could assume she wasn't interest as she looked and didn't send a message. Both then missing out on what could potentially be a great meet.

Time to be more daring

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What I've learnt from this thread is a woman could skip a profile and feel like she isn't good enough. She would show up on the recent viewed list but the guy could assume she wasn't interest as she looked and didn't send a message. Both then missing out on what could potentially be a great meet.

Time to be more daring "

i have never had a reply from a guy i have sent the first message to

What i concluded from that was guys who i am attracted to enough to mail obviously are not attracted to me

that's why i let men mail me first

in my cause I'm no good enough for the guys who catch my eye lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can relate to that lady. Absolutely. Ive turned down meets because of guys who I thought were 'out of my league'.

"

On a number of occasions....you have to stick to the rules and never bat above your score.

For example I'm a 4 and a 5 in good light & if I've made an effort, therefore I only feel properly comfortable meeting 7s or below. I have met many 8, 9 and 10s but I never feel quite good enough & think it's some sort of charity shag on their part.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did at first, but my self confidence has grow hugely since being on fab.. Now I just go for it whether it is a yes or no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One puts their heads above the parapet in the front trenches and to be sure, your ego is gonna gets plenty of slapping, However, a civil ,polite enquiry retains yer dignity and if you don't ask , you don't get. You have to believe , someone out there will want to collide with you. Don't let them grind you down folks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What I've learnt from this thread is a woman could skip a profile and feel like she isn't good enough. She would show up on the recent viewed list but the guy could assume she wasn't interest as she looked and didn't send a message. Both then missing out on what could potentially be a great meet.

Time to be more daring "

But I perve in stealth mode

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Arrogance: I am better than everyone else.

Confidence: No one else is any better than me.

I quote this on any thread that mentions either, but that's just because it sounds cool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What I've learnt from this thread is a woman could skip a profile and feel like she isn't good enough. She would show up on the recent viewed list but the guy could assume she wasn't interest as she looked and didn't send a message. Both then missing out on what could potentially be a great meet.

Time to be more daring

But I perve in stealth mode "

I think most do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On here I think you need to have full awareness that you are a wonderful person as it is easy for your confidence to be knocked and remember they don't know you only the persona you portray here

Basically don't give a fuck what anyone thinks hold your head up and be confident

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have insecurities about my size and body , some of it is caused by comments from men in the past but I also know I'm not a minger and have a good heart and wicked soh, I wouldn't meet someone who was body beautiful or younger than me as I would be too self conscious and wonder why me .... very sad I know.

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

Yep! And.. you are one of those guys, as it goes

Its hard to explain why. I think the phrase 'if it looks too good to be true....' comes into my head .

I had a proper hotty message me a few days ago, and after I picked myself up off the floor, I had to say to him 'surely you can't be real'

Usually, I am quite confident myself!! Good looking guys just floor me lol. Fear of rejection? you bet your ass lol

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I appreciate all attention and recognise that we all want something different. No point being put off when someone sees that you're hot. Even better when you are told that you are the most beautiful in a place, though we may not get this all the time - many can be in awe of us, but if you have an open heart then others sense that you are not over bearing. Arrogance is certainly a turn off, Id drop it like a shot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What would you class a person who is a bit too proud of themselves. Filled with pride as opposed to someone who likes to be humble?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What would you class a person who is a bit too proud of themselves. Filled with pride as opposed to someone who likes to be humble?

"

a cocky twat?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What would you class a person who is a bit too proud of themselves. Filled with pride as opposed to someone who likes to be humble?

a cocky twat? "

Pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off

her, she was obviously put off by me.

Ive just looked at your profile and pics. I don't think I would message you as you are out of my league....but Id just keep going back to look at your pics

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Coming from a guy who's not got the best body in the world and is insecure about his size in the trouser department, if I look at couples profiles and see the guy is athletic or has a bigger penis then I think 'no point in messaging'. So that's lack of self confidence (although I will admit reading the profiles of people who are size queens and only want VWE guys don't help matters too much haha!)

There's actually someone i'm friends with on here and who I actually really, really like. We've been talking for a long while and she wants to meet me and I want to meet her but I look at all of the guys that have given her verifications and they're all slim or athletic guys with great bodies and they're all vwe.

I also read the verifications she leaves on their profiles and they're all ecstatic about the meet they had and where i'm inexperienced I don't know if I could satisfy her the way those guys have.

I start to get pretty panicky cos I might not be good enough for her.

I'm not really like that with anyone else, I just really like her and don't want to disappoint her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What would you class a person who is a bit too proud of themselves. Filled with pride as opposed to someone who likes to be humble?

a cocky twat? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't turn someone down with the excuse of not feeling good enough for them,im not going to question why men message me,the answer is always going to be the same,sex

I can sometimes feel a little intimidated by profiles but never to the point where I wouldn't message them,even if its nothing more than a compliment on a good profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I just love meeting people and exploring. Sure Attraction, Banter and Chemistry are key, but pictures are an awful representation, written word to brief and Chemistry is impossible to predict until you meet in person.

So, I'd rather meet (social initially) and experience the excitement of meeting, especially as it just might lead to more when meeting someone from here.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Coming from a guy who's not got the best body in the world and is insecure about his size in the trouser department, if I look at couples profiles and see the guy is athletic or has a bigger penis then I think 'no point in messaging'. So that's lack of self confidence (although I will admit reading the profiles of people who are size queens and only want VWE guys don't help matters too much haha!)

There's actually someone i'm friends with on here and who I actually really, really like. We've been talking for a long while and she wants to meet me and I want to meet her but I look at all of the guys that have given her verifications and they're all slim or athletic guys with great bodies and they're all vwe.

I also read the verifications she leaves on their profiles and they're all ecstatic about the meet they had and where i'm inexperienced I don't know if I could satisfy her the way those guys have.

I start to get pretty panicky cos I might not be good enough for her.

I'm not really like that with anyone else, I just really like her and don't want to disappoint her."

Yes but if you are friends and have a real connection you may be offering her something she finds way more appealing than simply good looks and even hot sex. There are deeper ways to satisfy. Go for it! !

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"What would you class a person who is a bit too proud of themselves. Filled with pride as opposed to someone who likes to be humble?

"

Quite possibly someone who is deeply insecure and protecting themselves by hiding behind an arrogant persona.

Or they may be a true narcissist.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't turn someone down with the excuse of not feeling good enough for them,im not going to question why men message me,the answer is always going to be the same,sex "

I agree. My confidence is totally crap but I've never turned someone down because I think I'm not good enough. I spend plenty of time chatting and getting to know men. I have pictures in my friends that show I'm far from body perfect but I hope my personality makes up for that in some small way

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By *uperGuy68Man
over a year ago

Southampton


"I did but not now....I just think fuck it I'll message them.....I am strong enough to take rejection on the chin "

Would be surprised if you and rejection meet very often.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"I did but not now....I just think fuck it I'll message them.....I am strong enough to take rejection on the chin

Would be surprised if you and rejection meet very often. "

You'd be surprised

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still feel very new to all this, But after a few social/meets and club visits I know my conference will grow,

So be prepared for my messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes all the time.. After reading their profile and looking at their pics I check out the people they have met... If they are all slender younger women it screams out to me that's their preference and I won't meet.. Not because I'm not confident, I feel that they are only asking coz it's available.. And if there was a slender woman offering I wouldn't be in the picture... Happened to many times in the clubs ... Good job I have broad shoulders and don't offend easy "

Oddly enough I have the reverse, is rather confusing when guys who state they love bbw's/curvy/big boobs send me a message yet its obvious (when I had pictures up) that I am slim. Maybe a cue for a forum post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a fine line between self confidence and arrogance. But looking at the opposite end of the spectrum does the sheer lack of it put you off?

I was recently rejected because she felt like I was "to good looking for her" it made me feel a little bad actually and she was such a lovely woman. She said she felt intimated and not good enough, although it didn't put me off her, she was obviously put off by me.

My question is, have you ever felt quite not good enough to message someone and skipped passed their profile?

"

Frequently.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

i like to chat to anyone .. and i hope i can perform in any league ..but you have to get to know me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's a very British trait to be reserved, even here it happens!

And if this means turning down a meet because I think I'm not good enough, yeah I've done it!

But that doesn't mean I'm right, I have some confidence issues but not enough to hold me back from a hot meet now, I was newer here then and didn't know how hard it is for "normal" looking guys to make an impression. We are 10 a penny!

You flaunt wat ya got! If peep don't like it then maybe it's not meant to be

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By *leasures4Couple
over a year ago

East midlands

I (fem) shy away from messaging some profiles, yes.

I see lots of very sexy people with pretty amazing bodies on here which I would love to explore and pleasure but find them out of my league as I'm a size 20.

Although when we are in a club, Im much more confident?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I (fem) shy away from messaging some profiles, yes.

I see lots of very sexy people with pretty amazing bodies on here which I would love to explore and pleasure but find them out of my league as I'm a size 20.

Although when we are in a club, Im much more confident?! "

Prefer your victims more captive do we? Lol

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By *leasures4Couple
over a year ago

East midlands

No...Iol! My confidence is better in a club atmosphere, plus its easier to get to know someone face to face...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"On here I think you need to have full awareness that you are a wonderful person as it is easy for your confidence to be knocked and remember they don't know you only the persona you portray here

Basically don't give a fuck what anyone thinks hold your head up and be confident "

I like your attitude.

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By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago

Dublin and London

I tend to shy away from the really fit couples. But I prefer to chat to anyone that fancies it and try get to know them as look although important are not the most important thing for me. I much prefer a genuine cheeky couple who are relaxed and up for a laugh. J

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By *ittleBitOfFunCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff


"On here I think you need to have full awareness that you are a wonderful person as it is easy for your confidence to be knocked and remember they don't know you only the persona you portray here

Basically don't give a fuck what anyone thinks hold your head up and be confident

I like your attitude. "

Yes I agree it's easy for your self confidence to get knocked on here. Confidence is very attractive and we only look for people who have a friendly personality with a sense of humour. You can be the hottest person in the world but with no personality it doesn't get you anywhere really. In answer to the OP's question, yes I have been intimidated but we have still tried our luck

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say I am quietly confident it's not something I feel the need to bang on about.

I rarely message new people I spend most of my time boring my existing friends

Most of those I send come back marked return to sender anyway.

For those of you who say someone is out of your league so you won't meet them.

Would you say to someone you did not feel was up to your standards. "Sorry I am out of your league" ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For those of you who say someone is out of your league so you won't meet them.

Would you say to someone you did not feel was up to your standards. "Sorry I am out of your league" ?"

no id not say that as to me that would be quite rude, i would say they arent my type though.

in a way though saying to someone 'id not meet you because your outta my league' in a way is a back handed compliment that they are the ones too good for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For those of you who say someone is out of your league so you won't meet them.

Would you say to someone you did not feel was up to your standards. "Sorry I am out of your league" ?

no id not say that as to me that would be quite rude, i would say they arent my type though.

in a way though saying to someone 'id not meet you because your outta my league' in a way is a back handed compliment that they are the ones too good for me "

A bit like being turned down because your cocks too big.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For those of you who say someone is out of your league so you won't meet them.

Would you say to someone you did not feel was up to your standards. "Sorry I am out of your league" ?

no id not say that as to me that would be quite rude, i would say they arent my type though.

in a way though saying to someone 'id not meet you because your outta my league' in a way is a back handed compliment that they are the ones too good for me

A bit like being turned down because your cocks too big."

Or you might have misheard and they said your a big cock

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

I am always insecure about my looks, but if I know someone likes me then I just relax. The initial attraction hurdle is my sticking point.

Sexually I am reasonably confident as I have very good control and am very attentive.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I have confident phases and less confident phases. Yes, I've passed by profiles and declined meets because I've thought the person too hot to be interested in me, or likely to be disappointed by me in person.

OP, if you messaged me I'd wonder what the heck you were thinking tbh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to add another part to this.. along with others id think 'wtf' whys that a muscular guy (like the OP) messaging me?

This is also down to the fact that i am attracted to people with similar interests to myself (its not just about the physical, mental connections are just as important) and for me who neglects my body and have become over weight i find it baffling that a gent who eats well and dedicated time to the gym would even consider myself for sexual pleasure when we are so opposite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would say I am quietly confident it's not something I feel the need to bang on about.

I rarely message new people I spend most of my time boring my existing friends

Most of those I send come back marked return to sender anyway.

For those of you who say someone is out of your league so you won't meet them.

Would you say to someone you did not feel was up to your standards. "Sorry I am out of your league" ?"
you are far from boring

I would say I'm fairly confident.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i like woman body and mind i do like a toned body but cant help my self when it comes to a fuller fingered woman a woman with some flesh to grab bite and nibble on

the words of Freddy fat bottomed girls you make the rocking world go round i like biggish smallish and toned so shoot me if im a freak lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've turned down guys plenty times cause they are way to good looking! My body next to their body would be embarrassing! Altho I love to look at a fine 6pack, I would save myself the embarrassment and not meet them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have to say i would be happy to to have your body next to mine i might not have the 6pack but i do have 12 cans of stella in the car lol wanna share a tin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmmmm this thread is making me think less of getting down the gym and more ordering pizza tonight!

Anyone want to share? Meat feast? Lol

I'm by no means out of shape but I have a little extra that I don't need, I'm happy to share my time with someone that excites my mind as well as other things

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

I find arrogance a total put off, I'm confident with who I am... I don't have a fantastic body but it's mine and I like both my self and my body.

I'm happy to meet people I find hugely physically and mentally attractive and have a playmate from another site who just stops talk when he walks in as he is (shy) but seriously about as physically hot as can be ( many would say).

He enjoys playing with me and if we are both happy I don't see it as anything to be bothered about.

I have also met someone who was very lush but just didn't do it at all physically at for me as I just didn't feel the chemistry at all.

I think just enjoy and if you like someone don't be out off by their good looks... Let them chose what they like... It can be in the eye of the beholder anyway....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i know this the wrong post but i do like the red boots awesome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A shy man can have sexual confidence. Like Clark Kent in the bedroom turning into Superman

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.


"i know this the wrong post but i do like the red boots awesome "

If that's my boots.. Many thanks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes your welcome!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A shy man can have sexual confidence. Like Clark Kent in the bedroom turning into Superman "

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By *ratty_DamselWoman
over a year ago

London.

There is a difference between being shy and having low self esteem.

The way a person is in public when shy can be vastly different when with people in a small group or 121.

Self esteem however is a lot more tricky and the person feels inferior to others.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I think its a shame. So many people on this thread could be missing out on a good time.

Unlike quietly confident men

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

Quietly confident is the one that works for me.

The shy guy I refer too is sexually confident and has no esteem issues.

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By *renchbambi xWoman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

If he/she likes me and I like him/her..it will be what it will be! I do not complicate encounters, they just are!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have loads come see

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think its a shame. So many people on this thread could be missing out on a good time.

Unlike quietly confident men

"

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By *eliciouslyNastyMan
over a year ago

London

Are we sure this actually happens?

And it isn't just a polite way is saying "no thanks?"

After all define "out of league"...

An Olympic athlete or a PhD, but the rest of is are in the same boat?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am self confident. I guess others just don't see what I see in myself. Perhaps I'm just deluded

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have had men explain that they only have a small cock,like it's something to apologise for. I reply with it's ok I have a small mouth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If he/she likes me and I like him/her..it will be what it will be! I do not complicate encounters, they just are! "

That's a great way to be I prefer personality over looks like it has been said before looks doesn't always mean an attraction ?

Each person has their beautiful ! Which can be just the fun and laughter that can be shared with a " beautiful person "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I turn down many a fit guy as i feel that im way out of their league. And message me out of sheer desperation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"to add another part to this.. along with others id think 'wtf' whys that a muscular guy (like the OP) messaging me?

This is also down to the fact that i am attracted to people with similar interests to myself (its not just about the physical, mental connections are just as important) and for me who neglects my body and have become over weight i find it baffling that a gent who eats well and dedicated time to the gym would even consider myself for sexual pleasure when we are so opposite"

Yeah I think this too. Feel like gym bunny men and women will judge me for my greedy habits

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I like the look of a woman/couple, whether it be from the forums or chatroom and I think we could make a connection after reading their profile, I'll message them.

I can handle the rejection as there always is someone for everyone.

I would stop myself from messaging someone only if they specifically state I'm not what they're looking for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a chance would I feel too intimidated to contact someone based on their looks.....I am no better than anyone else but Im certainly as good as anyone else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I skip many profiles because I think guys are too good for me and 9 times out of 10 I am right

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE


"to add another part to this.. along with others id think 'wtf' whys that a muscular guy (like the OP) messaging me?

This is also down to the fact that i am attracted to people with similar interests to myself (its not just about the physical, mental connections are just as important) and for me who neglects my body and have become over weight i find it baffling that a gent who eats well and dedicated time to the gym would even consider myself for sexual pleasure when we are so opposite

Yeah I think this too. Feel like gym bunny men and women will judge me for my greedy habits "

You have nothing at all to worry about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not a chance would I feel too intimidated to contact someone based on their looks.....I am no better than anyone else but Im certainly as good as anyone else "

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