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Tip of the day!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Whats your tip of the day?

mine is don't fold clothes, roll them up this should reduce creases

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't sign up to a swingers site at 3am when pissed and expect a blozzer within minutes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Double check the red can your spraying on your hair is deffo dry shampoo not the deep heat you placed next to it in the drawer the other day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Double check the red can your spraying on your hair is deffo dry shampoo not the deep heat you placed next to it in the drawer the other day "
bet that smarted a little

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Double check the red can your spraying on your hair is deffo dry shampoo not the deep heat you placed next to it in the drawer the other day "

I made that mistake once, I thought it was deodorant. I'd also just shaved my chest.

I'm fairly sure you could hear my discomfort on Pluto!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

When the weathers nice head to Kestrals and pretend you are at Cap D'arge

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

Dont use a wand on full power for too long.

The lady may cum soooo hard that she can hardly stand anymore and just wants to cry for 5 mins.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone "

now that is something I didn't know. Very useful thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone

now that is something I didn't know. Very useful thank you "

Same principle as dry shampoo

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone "

same with if you spill of baby oil on your front room carpet

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE


"If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone

now that is something I didn't know. Very useful thank you

Same principle as dry shampoo "

But not Deep Heat ?

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Don't compere a comedy event and whisper your material 3 foot away from the microphone.

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

I'll go wit hthe same one we did/I used on Monday's version. Cant remember what it was but it was from VIZ

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Double check the red can your spraying on your hair is deffo dry shampoo not the deep heat you placed next to it in the drawer the other day "

Pmsl

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By *eard-lincolnMan
over a year ago

near lincoln

If you have a screw you can't get out as the thread is worn. Put an elastic band over it then try

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

RECREATE the Ryanair experience by getting mates to try &; flog you scratchcards with a megaphone while you're trying to sleep.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Double check the red can your spraying on your hair is deffo dry shampoo not the deep heat you placed next to it in the drawer the other day

Pmsl "

Yes only me , knew you would like that one....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ENSURE all your work emails are read by the recipients by marking them NSFW.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you bury your ex under the patio....plant him vertically leaving his head exposed. Add a hosepipe to his mouth and you have a stunning water feature.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When you bury your ex under the patio....plant him vertically leaving his head exposed. Add a hosepipe to his mouth and you have a stunning water feature..... "
pmsl....brill..

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Spilled a little red wine on your carpet you stupid twat?

Try a splash of white wine, hey presto the stain should go with a little dabbing.

Also you can follow the same process if you spill ketchup on your carpet by smearing it with mayonaise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone

now that is something I didn't know. Very useful thank you

Same principle as dry shampoo

But not Deep Heat ?"

Deep heat isn't absorbant. It works for lube too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spilled a little red wine on your carpet you stupid twat?

Try a splash of white wine, hey presto the stain should go with a little dabbing.

Also you can follow the same process if you spill ketchup on your carpet by smearing it with mayonaise. "

The opposite works too. Spilled white wine on your posh new carpet? Simple just throw some red wine on it and watch those stains disappear

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By *nigmatic1Woman
over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

If you see your ex running round the garden holding his head...shoot the bastard again!!

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By *ucky1Man
over a year ago

a straightjacket

When mowing the grass, always avoid going over dog/cat poo as it sticks to your blades and stinks the whole mower out..... as I've just found out!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Steal chips from other people's bags. They taste better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep away from squirters cos once the novelty wears off it becomes an inconvenience. Take me anywhere but put some towels down first !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

SPAGHETTI HOOPS make great edible loom bands for hungry children.

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By *imply_SensualMan
over a year ago

warrington

If you are having trouble working out percentages, swap the figures around, it might make it easier, e.g.

32% of 25 - tricky

but 25% of 32 = 8, easy!

or

42% of 50 - tricky,

but 50% of 42 = 21, easy!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Steal chips from other people's bags. They taste better "

So true!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Steal chips from other people's bags. They taste better

So true!"

They do that to my fucking chicken!!! Get your bloody own!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men only

Never leave your cuppa on the side of the bath when getting out

It takes tea bagging to a whole new level

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

RAN OUT of Branston Pickle? Simply mix vomit with HP Sauce.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Steal chips from other people's bags. They taste better

So true!

They do that to my fucking chicken!!! Get your bloody own!!

"

But it tastes so much better!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Top tip is "never eat yellow snow"

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By *ondcpl4meetCouple
over a year ago

North of the river


"If you drip oil on clothing cover liberally with talcum powder and leave overnight. Brush off in the morning and the oil will be gone "

Does this work for cum too???

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Ok a serious 1 now. If you have very bad sunburn do the following to take the sting out of it.

Run a cool bath and to the bath add half a glass of vinegar and soak in it for a while - we also washed a T shirt in it and then slept in it. it wont remove the redness but it will turn off your bodies auto protect system off till the burn has gone away but please dont do this and go back in the sun it could seriously harm you. Done it and tried it and trust me it works.S

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Keep away from squirters cos once the novelty wears off it becomes an inconvenience. Take me anywhere but put some towels down first ! "

Toddlers disposable bed pads....£2.99 for 10

For the squirter in YOUR life.......

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield


"Ok a serious 1 now. If you have very bad sunburn do the following to take the sting out of it.

Run a cool bath and to the bath add half a glass of vinegar and soak in it for a while - we also washed a T shirt in it and then slept in it. it wont remove the redness but it will turn off your bodies auto protect system off till the burn has gone away but please dont do this and go back in the sun it could seriously harm you. Done it and tried it and trust me it works.S

"

Natural live yoghurt rubbed onto sunburn takes the sting out of it.

However make sure it's unsweetened or you'll stick to the sheets.

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

Saw this recently. The spring coil in old type pen? Are great for putting over your phone charger leads ( end where lead plugs in phone) gives it support and stops it bending/ breaking..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When buying fruit by the kilo, buy grapes instead of apples. Apples are much heavier.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Wash your cock it won't then end up being a cheesy wosit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Paint your nails just before its time to prepare dinner so your OH has to do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Keep away from squirters cos once the novelty wears off it becomes an inconvenience. Take me anywhere but put some towels down first !

Toddlers disposable bed pads....£2.99 for 10

For the squirter in YOUR life....... "

It's the carrying them about on the name of spontaneity thats the problem

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't use your finger tips to stop a circular saw blade

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Keep away from squirters cos once the novelty wears off it becomes an inconvenience. Take me anywhere but put some towels down first !

Toddlers disposable bed pads....£2.99 for 10

For the squirter in YOUR life.......

It's the carrying them about on the name of spontaneity thats the problem "

But the look of awe and admiration as you whip one out of your top pocket will more than compensate. Us ladies love a thoughtful gentleman......

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

If you are susceptible to burning in the sun consider P20. It's a one application sun screen which was recommended to me years ago by a very pale red head.

You apply it once, thoroughly, let it dry, wait 15 mins and you're protected for the rest of the day. And it really does work! I've got very fair skin which burns easily and I've used it in India and Egypt and not burnt.

You can get it from major chemists in a variety of levels of cover from factor 15 to factor 50. It's not cheap but remember it's only once a day and lasts through swimming and only washes off with soap.

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield


"Keep away from squirters cos once the novelty wears off it becomes an inconvenience. Take me anywhere but put some towels down first !

Toddlers disposable bed pads....£2.99 for 10

For the squirter in YOUR life.......

It's the carrying them about on the name of spontaneity thats the problem

But the look of awe and admiration as you whip one out of your top pocket will more than compensate. Us ladies love a thoughtful gentleman...... "

Asda smartprice shower curtains! £2.99 and will cover a double bed with ease and can be washed in the machine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Top tip - don't fight with crocodiles !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Keep away from squirters cos once the novelty wears off it becomes an inconvenience. Take me anywhere but put some towels down first !

Toddlers disposable bed pads....£2.99 for 10

For the squirter in YOUR life.......

It's the carrying them about on the name of spontaneity thats the problem

But the look of awe and admiration as you whip one out of your top pocket will more than compensate. Us ladies love a thoughtful gentleman......

Asda smartprice shower curtains! £2.99 and will cover a double bed with ease and can be washed in the machine."

Bloody hell ! I'd be like Roy Cropper, turning up for a meet carrying my plastic bag of goodies. Some flowers, bottle of wine, condoms, bath towel, baby wet pads, shower curtains, swimming suit !

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

If it doesn't work, hit it with a hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer.

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By *ilkynmyzzyCouple
over a year ago

Bridlington


"If it doesn't work, hit it with a hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer."

Does that work on a lazy OH

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If it doesn't work, hit it with a hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer.

Does that work on a lazy OH "

Only if you are already planning a new patio

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By *ilkynmyzzyCouple
over a year ago

Bridlington


"If it doesn't work, hit it with a hammer. If it still doesn't work, hit it with a bigger hammer.

Does that work on a lazy OH

Only if you are already planning a new patio "

I was only planning on having him make me a brew

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To chuck the milk u left on the side all day in the bin. Before someone tries to drink it ooopppps

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Want to eat more healthily and lose weight? Nettles are an incredible source of Iron and vitamin C. Harvest a bagfull and eat raw, and watch as your desire to eat ebbs away. As soon as any need to eat surfaces, hold a compress of fresh stems and leaves to your mouth and lips, and sit atop your tongue.

For massive savings against the dentists extortionate charges, supermarket own brand bleach will have your teeth gleaming for just pennies. Best done whilst your teeth have been immersed in nettles, so are nutrient rich.

Need fuller lips, for that gorgeous pouting look? Look no further than those nettles. A few fresh sprigs wafted upon those shriveled lips will plump em up in no time at all. Then just use your standard lipstick, and recreate that model look, without needing complicated booking of appointments and expensive surgery trips to salons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When you bury your ex under the patio....plant him vertically leaving his head exposed. Add a hosepipe to his mouth and you have a stunning water feature..... "
hahaha love it !!! Can you make it a hike big enough for 2 or maybe 3 . In fact make it 4 there's someone else I'd like to get rid if

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When you bury your ex under the patio....plant him vertically leaving his head exposed. Add a hosepipe to his mouth and you have a stunning water feature..... hahaha love it !!! Can you make it a hike big enough for 2 or maybe 3 . In fact make it 4 there's someone else I'd like to get rid if "

It'll be like the fountains at Versailles Shell if we plant them all!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my tip is ...... shhhush x to me though x

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

A ladder turned upside down can be used to climb down off things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine is don't reach out for your coffee whilst still looking at your laptop screen. ...

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"A ladder turned upside down can be used to climb down off things."

Credit to VIZ

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden


"A ladder turned upside down can be used to climb down off things.

Credit to VIZ"

Just got it tweeted, had to share.

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By *ourbonKissMan
over a year ago

a land up north..... of leicester

Eating an Apple a day will keep the doctor away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes, you shouldn't trust a fart

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep yer tips clean, in case you chance upon a favorable meet.

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